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20-02-2023

(Un)requited Love

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I was with you all the time.
I came first to your life.
I've been showing you how I feel.
How come you didn't notice?
How come you can't reciprocate mine when you give your all to someone you just met? You're selfish, you're numb.

I tried not to love you, I tried not to fall for you.
But what can I do? It's not like I can control my feelings.
It's not like I can just tell my heart not to.
Even if I tried not to love you, it's still you.
You still make my heart beat faster, even with your simple smile.
You still get my attention even with your simple speech.
What did I do in my past life that make me crazy for you?

"How do you define your existence?" I've been asked repeatedly.
But my answer never changed "I exist for someone, I exist for something. I exist to give love." I answered without thinking twice, without any doubt.

But I was stunned the moment they asked.

"If you exist for someone, who exists for you?" They don't know anything about my past, but I always wonder why it hits me hard.

Why do I feel like my heart started to beat for you again? Why does it feel like all the feelings I had came back, rushing towards me like a flood?

"Ma'am? Miss Sana? Are you okay?"

It echoed inside my head 'Sana?! Ma'am! Miss Sana! Are you okay?!' repeatedly...

And then everything went dark...
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