I stared up at the living room ceiling as I listened to Stokeley and Gabe talking to their live stream. I'm laying on the couch and Isaiah is sitting by my feet. I forgave him. I know what it looked like. We kinda talked and thankfully we are okay again. I think.

Jahseh comes home today. It's been too long of a week without him. I miss him so much.

"There isn't nothing we can't handle. We're making it to the top" I heard Stokeley say. "All of us are" he added. They all have so much love for their fans. I think it's amazing. I sat up and grabbed my phone. I didn't see a text from Jahseh. Maybe he's still on the plane.

I was about to put my phone down, but I saw Ki texted me saying hey. I don't know if I really want to talk to him right now. I love him, but maybe I should distance myself from him a little bit. For the sake of my relationship. I stood up and walked into the bathroom. I'm so tired. I haven't been sleeping well. I don't know why. I heard the front door open and heard the boys yell a bunch of things.

"Yo!" I heard Jahsehs voice with a laugh. My eyes widened and I quickly opened the bathroom door. I saw the boys standing around Jahseh. I guess he heard the bathroom door open because he looked my way. His smile grew bigger as he saw me.

"Babe!" I yelled and ran over to him wrapping my arms around his neck. He grabbed onto me tightly. He lifted me up so I wrapped my legs around his torso. I pulled away to look at him.

"I missed you so much" he mumbled against my lips before kissing me softly.

"Y'all look at this" I heard Stokeleys voice. I pulled away and smiled at Jahseh who's smiling back at me. He put me down gently and I looked over at Stokeley who's facing his phone at us. I forgot he's on live. "They cute" He said before putting the camera back on himself. I giggled and shook my head. I went to walk back over to the couch, but I felt Jahseh put his hands on my waist pulling me back. He pulled me close to his body so my back was pressed against his chest. He leaned his head against mine. I put my hands on his hands that were around me.

"How is everyone?" Jahseh asked them. They all have different responses.

"Good. How was LA?" Gabe asked him.

"It was a lot of fun" I turned around in his arms and pressed my head against his chest hugging him tightly. His grip got tighter as well. I don't want to let him go. "I'm just glad to be home"

***

I sat up quickly, breathing very heavily and putting my hand to my head. I tried to take a deep breath. I just had a nightmare. It was probably the worst dream I've ever had.

"What's wrong?" I heard Jahsehs raspy voice. I must have woken him up. I looked over at him and went to talk. "Why are you crying?" He asked and sat up. He rubbed his eyes and tilted his head a little.

"Just a bad dream" I told him. I wiped my tears. "It was just so vivid and scary, Jah" I said and covered my face with my hands. I took slow deep breaths. I felt his hand on my back. He ran his hand up and down my back and he moved closer to me.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He quietly asked. I let out a sob as I tried to talk. "Shh it's okay babe. It was just a dream. It's okay now" he moved even closer and wrapped both arms around me. I felt his head lay on my shoulder. "I'm here. Don't cry please. It's all okay" He quickly picked up his head, placed a kiss on my shoulder then laid his head back down.

"Instead of seeing my brothers dead body, it was yours" I started. He picked up his head and I looked over at him. He just stared back at me sadly. "And there were no police or ambulance at the scene either. Just me and you. I couldn't run to you. I couldn't move. It was like I was stuck. I couldn't help you. I couldn't save you" I explained and started to cry again. He sighed and wiped my tears.

"I'm here. I'm alive" he said quietly then kissed my forehead.

"Don't you ever leave me" I said making him chuckle softly.

"I'm not going anywhere babygirl" he told me. I wrapped my arms around him. He ran his hand through my hand and kissed the top of my head. "I'm not going anywhere" he repeated, but more quietly. He pulled me down gently so we can lay down. I just laid my head on his chest holding him tightly. As if I'm scared to let go.

I don't know what I'd ever do if he died. I would want to die too. I've developed such love for him. I'm so in love with him. I don't ever want to leave him. I picked up my head and pressed my lips against his. As I pulled away, I looked him in the eyes.

"Thank you for always taking care of me"

"I'll always be here for you" he told me as he tucked some of my hair behind my ear. "I'm grateful for you" I couldn't help, but smile a little.

"I love you Jahseh. I used to be so upset all the time. About everything. Then I met you and somehow you managed to make me positive and- and it's like I know how to have fun again. You've changed me for the better. You're like my best friend too and I got so extremely lucky to have met you. You've done so much for me and I'll forever be grateful. Thank you" he smiled widely.

I could tell how happy that made him. He cupped my face with both hands then pressed his lips to mine. We kissed passionately. We both smiled through the kiss. I felt butterflies in my stomach just like the first time we kissed.

"I fucking love you, Anastasia. You make me a better person as well. I don't know what I'd do without you" He told me. Again, we kissed. It felt so right being with him. I really think he's the one.