08.

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It's an early morning today.

Hockey practice on Wednesdays is scheduled before class. Luckily for me, my classes don't start until later, so I have enough time to be here and catch all my afternoon classes after practice.

Del offered to drive me there, but I declined.

I need to exercise a little, so I wanted to jog there. As a physiology student, I know exactly how important it is to exercise daily, and I try to do as much as I can.

I often go at night when it's nice and quiet.

I get into the shower to wake myself up for the long day that's ahead of me. Chase isn't in at this hour, much to my disappointment. I would've loved to talk to him right now.

Talking and singing with him brightens my mood and my day is a little better when I communicate with him in our little way.

I need to talk to him soon and figure out what all this is before something happens.

I should ask him what to do about Del. Maybe he encourages me to pursue him. If he does, I will know he is not interested in starting something between us.

If not, I don't know what will happen.

I am not looking to be in a love triangle with two guys. However, if I need to make a decision, I also wouldn't know who I'd choose.

Maybe I should tell them both I'm not looking for anything exclusive and see where it goes with the two of them. I'd feel bad to do that. It's already unlike me to hang out and experiment with one guy, let alone two at the same time.

I'm more of a relationship person. That's when I'm in my comfort zone.

Ugh.

Why does it all have to be this complicated?

I turn the shower off and take out the towel I had set on the counter. I dry my body before putting on my underwear, it's a matching set.

I bought it to impress my ex-boyfriend, but now I wear it for myself.

I like wearing pretty lingerie. Looking at myself in the mirror with it on, I get a little confidence, and I feel good—sexy even.

Who says you can't dress up for yourself, so that's what I've been doing. Every time I wear lingerie, I wear it for me and me only.

But I have to say I would love to see the reaction of—

Fuck. I need to choose.

On top of that, midterms are in two weeks, and I think I'm still on schedule. People who've already taken the class told me that as long as I won't fall behind on the course material, I'll be fine, so I am not worrying.

My hair is in a high ponytail, I have put my running clothes on, and I'm ready to go.

I leave the room and get into the elevator. As I get downstairs, I press start on my tracking app and take off.

The fresh air fills my lungs as I start at a slow pace to warm up.

The leaves on the trees are starting to change colors as they get ready to fall now that autumn is approaching. However, when I see the first leaves from trees start to fall, I am reminded of Halloween coming up. And even though autumn is my favorite season—I have resentment towards Halloween.

It's so overrated.

I don't even know what it's good for. What's the point behind it? I guess kids get candy, and students dress up as extra as they can.

I'm not a fan of parties, and as a kid, I was too afraid and shy to go door-to-door and ask for candy. So, I have never had any attachment to the holiday—if you can even call it a holiday—I would be okay with it disappearing in America.

I jog at a good relaxed pace on the sidewalk. I pay attention to keeping my breathing steady.

Cars occasionally drive past me. I wouldn't be surprised if some are people from the team. They should be going there around the same time as me. 

I think about the dinner and party they invited me to on Friday.

I invited Del to the dinner, was that the right move to make? I like Del, I just don't like that he has a history with Tamara, but I can't do anything about that or judge him for it. I used to be her friend once too.

I had expected him to push me to the side the moment we ran into her. He surprised me by not doing that. Instead, he took my side and not hers. He seemed a little hesitant at first when we ran into her, and he unwrapped his arm from around my shoulder, but maybe that is because he was caught off guard.

He took my hand, displaying affection for me in front of her. Holding hands is something intimate to me—feeling someone's palm against my own, it's such a couple thing.

I wonder how today's practice is going to be. I hope it won't be too obvious that I'm thirsting over Del at practice. I'm not going to put my full attention on him. He might be the star player, but there are still other people on the team I'm interested in and might even consider my friends.

It's only my second time at practice, and there are so many more to come. The first game I'm attending will be this Saturday. I don't know what to expect, but I have heard the after-parties are intense. Not particularly the team that goes wild—during the season, they stay pretty chill—it's the people throwing them parties that go wild.

It doesn't take long for me to get to the arena. Maybe it wasn't that long, or I had gotten too much into my thoughts.

I walk up to the door—this time, I'm not knocked over by a group of kids as I approach—I open the door and navigate myself to the ice without running into any of the players. As I get there, I only see Coach and Matt. They are waiting for the players to get out.

"Hey, Kiya!" Matt greets me first, and Coach does the same. "So I'm going to walk you through the equipment today. And a little explanation about each player and their weaknesses as they stand on the ice."

I smile and nod before he goes back to talk to Coach about the upcoming game.

I look around. The last time I was here, I didn't get to look around as I was so nervous and didn't want to get distracted as everything was new.

"Babes, you're here." I hear someone howler from behind me.

I quickly turn around to see Gabe and Taylor walking up here. Gabe is the one that screamed at me. Gabe wraps his arms around me and hugs me tightly, not giving me a chance to respond before he releases me.

"Hey," I greet them back excitedly, and Taylor pulls me into a friendly hug next.

The two broad guys stand in front of me in their hockey attire, making them look even more buff than they actually are, and I'm just this tiny girl.

"Good to see you again, are you still up for dinner on Friday?" Taylor asks and then wraps an arm around my waist as he smiles down at me.

Is this the time I should mention I invited Del to come along?

"Yes, I am but I wanted to say... I sort of invited Del to come too. I hope that's fine, I assumed it would be since you're all on the same team." I blurt out.

The both of them slightly frown, not out of disgust but just out of confusion. If I were them, I would too. Del and I, at the party, didn't get along. And other than that, they haven't seen us interact much.

Not that we have hung out a lot—just yesterday.

"Um sure that's alright, I would've asked him anyway but I hadn't realized you two had gotten close?" Taylor speaks, and Gabe stays silent as he seems to be in thought.

It still looks like confusion and not jealousy or anything.

"Yeah it sort of happened after practice on Monday and then we hung out on Tuesday. But he is nice, I liked him." I admit.

It's better to get this all out right away—before they assume things. I don't think they catch on to me liking him, but they probably think I like him just as a person.

"Alright then, you know he is my roommate right?" Taylor then says.

I did not.

Roommates. That means Taylor also lives on the same floor as me. As do more other boys from the hockey team, I heard most of them live together. I could've known that when I found out Del lives on my floor, but that didn't register with me back then.

"You live in my building?" I ask, confused.

"Mahogany house? Yeah I do, you live there too?" he says with a smile on his face.

"Yeah, I live on the same floor as you then. This is great." I smile.

Is it great, though?

I wonder what other players live in that apartment.

What if—

No, no. My Chase is definitely not on the team.

I wonder if he is looking for me. I want to stay oblivious to who he is for as long as I can hold it off.

Taylor starts to say something else but is cut off by Gabe.

"And I am being left out yet again." Gabe sighs in fake exasperation—in his tone, you can hear he is just joking and not truly sour about it.

"Where do you live?" I ask.

Okay, so I can cross Gabe off my list. Thank god for that.

It's not because I wouldn't want it to be him, well I don't, but it's the fact that I gave Chase an orgasm. I can't see Gabe in that way. From the start, I knew we would have a strictly platonic relationship. He and I don't reach that level.

Not because I think Taylor would, but he is still a little different from Gabe. He would more likely be my type.

"I live with a few guys off-campus, the party is at my place after the dinner on Friday so you will see then." Gabe smiles.

I am about to ask who else lives in that apartment, but before I get to ask, Del walks out and walks up to us as he eyes us standing that close together and Taylor having his arm around my waist.

His eyes slightly narrowed at that sight, and I can't help but wish Taylor didn't have his arm around me.

"My boy," Gabe greets him, "Kiya was just telling us she invited you over to dinner on Friday," Taylor adds.

"Yeah she did," he says and then walks up to me to give me a light hug as a greeting while giving Gabe and Taylor one of those bro hugs where they slap each other's backs real hard.

I will never understand why they feel the need to hurt the other while saying hi.

"You knew she also lives on our floor, why didn't you say so?" Taylor asks. He doesn't sound offended, but something else is laced in his tone.

"It wasn't anything that came up, also I don't see why it matters?"

Del sounds irritated and sounds snappy.

Am I the cause of this behavior that he is showing to his friends now? He has no reason to act this way, he is just being rude, and it doesn't make him attractive.

"Well, we could invite her over to our place more often,"

"Sure whatever," He answers before turning away and walking up to Coach to discuss something, not paying attention to me anymore.

Ouch. That was rather rude, is he regretting our date?

Maybe he came to his senses and realized Tamara was the better option. Or he is just bitter about my friendship with the boys?

"He's clearly in a mood," Gabe comments as he watches him walk up to Coach.

A mood, that's for sure.

I'm not sure if I should ask him about it later or just leave him be.

We hung out once. Does that mean we're friends now? Or was it a one-time thing? I did invite him to that dinner, so I guess we still have plans together.

I sigh exasperatedly. Let's get this practice over with first.

Gabe and Taylor soon get on the ice. I take that as my cue to walk up to Matt and start with whatever he wanted to tell me.

Matt takes me to the back; to show me where they keep everything—in case something happens and a player requires treatment. I already am familiar with most of the equipment he shows me as I used it back in high school.

I don't think this job will be very different from what I did there. It's mainly treating injuries they get out there. Hockey and football are both physical sports, so I assume the job more or less deals with the same.

After having shown me everything,  he takes me back on the ice; to get me acquainted with the players and their bodies—not in a dirty way.

We stand behind the glass, observing the players. We watch as they do an exercise Coach had commanded them to do.

Del is going at full-force shot after shot and seems to be blowing off some steam.

That was very necessary.

The team consists equally of freshmen, sophomores, juniors, and seniors. I am guessing they have the same acceptance rate for the team each year.

The freshmen and sophomores are the ones with the least complications. They are still relatively fresh and never had any injuries back in high school.

Some juniors have had more of a hard time; for example—Del once had his left shoulder dislocated, but thankfully it was only partially and not completely. He didn't need surgery. It does mean it is a weakness, and I know he hates that. His shoulder is more likely to be dislocated again.

Taylor, one of the oldest players on the team tore his ACL, it almost meant he was done but luckily he recovered.

The others I don't know yet also seem to have some hockey-related injuries—some have had muscle strains or basic concussions, a broken wrist, AC joint injuries, and that is it.

All in all, there are quite a few injuries within this team.

I know hockey is a pretty rough sport, and I'm afraid of what I will experience at the game this Saturday. I know already I will never play hockey, I am way too fragile for that, and my pain tolerance is very low.

I didn't even notice time was passing that quickly as the boys got off the ice again. Matt went into detail on each player, so that was time-consuming.

Before I manage to get out unnoticed, Del catches me and jumps in front of me—blocking any way I had to get out of the building.

"I'm driving you," He says as a statement rather than a question.

"Is that so?" I boldly ask. I don't want to put up with his behavior, not after him being so rude when he got here.

"Yeah, you didn't allow me to take you this morning and I'm not assuming you're going for another run. So my car it is."

"Alright, I'll wait outside the locker room. You can take a quick shower, I don't mind waiting." I tell him not wanting to challenge him on the car ride.

"No, I will just shower at home, I am guessing you still want to shower before class since you went on a run so it would make more sense for us both to shower at home, same time and place. Rather than you being late to class for having to wait up for me and then take a shower yourself." He quickly tells me.

He doesn't give me any time to object as he runs off to the locker room still on skates, making it look a little funny, to grab his bag and change into normal shoes.

And that is how I end up riding home with him—the guy I'm slightly crushing on by now—again.

//

Merry Christmas!! Xx


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