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Hi Soulmates!

It's been a long week, thanks for coming back.

Please leave me a *wave* here? :)

What have you been up to?

I missed you so much ><

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Sept 03, 2019

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Flashback chapter.
POV retold.

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Jungkook

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Hi, are you still there?

Jungkook presses send before he steps into the elevator.

He had been in vocal recording with Namjoon all morning,

and during their breaks Namjoon had given him plenty of advice about this Soulmate Bond.

And now...

Jungkook felt grounded.

Solid.

Confident, finally.

His phone buzzes as he exits onto the 3rd floor.

Hey. I'm out having pizza with Tae.

She was with Taehyung again.

Jungkook sighs.

Yes.

Are you back at Bighit? Want me to bring you some pizza?

Are you guys eating in a restaurant?

Jungkook wonders if he can get a driver to take him to them.

We're parked on the side of the street, eating in the car lol.

In front of that pizza joint Taehyung loves.

But we're almost done.

It's OK I'll just get delivery food here.

I just heard from Namjoon hyung that Bangtan is going to Japan.

For how long?

We leave the day after tomorrow.

Gone for two days.

I think we will be OK if we Heal right before I go.

Jungkook's fingers linger over his keyboard.

He did it.

He told her he was going without her.

Just an hour ago, he would have asked her to go with him.

Just an hour ago, he wouldn't have wanted to separate.

But after his talk with Namjoon...

It was easier to tell her over text.

He doesn't think he can handle seeing the surprise on her face.

Maybe he would cave.

Maybe he would ask her to go with him after all, if he saw her eyes widen with hurt.

She wouldn't invite herself.

She was too polite for that.

His job was done.

Jungkook slides his phone back into his pocket,

ignoring it with pang to his heart,

when it vibrates briefly.

He was going to do what he promised Namjoon.

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         You

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Setting your phone down, you nibble on the pizza in your hand.

It no longer tasted as good.

Was something off with Jungkook?

Of course you understood if he was going away for work.

But for him to just decide that he would go two days without Healing...

You shake it off.

He was strong enough.

He would be fine.

And you couldn't let your hurt feelings get in the way of his freedom.

"Why do you look so sad?" Taehyung blurts.

He tears his eyes away from his pizza to look at you.

"You boys are going to Japan?"

Taehyung freezes, a string of cheese hanging out of his mouth.

"When?"

"The day after tomorrow, Jungkook says."

"Oh. They didn't tell me."

Taehyung chews thoughtfully, wiping tomato sauce from his chin.

You rip open a packet of wet wipe, cleaning your fingers.

"You barely ate any," Taehyung frowns.

"What's going on? You usually..."

The man in the driver's seat, also one of the managers,

turns around to face you.

"Are you going? To be with Jungkook?"

You swallow past the lump in your throat.

"No."

Taehyung looks up from grabbing his third slice.

"Why not?"

"I don't... I don't think he needs me. He told me he is going and said we can Heal beforehand."

You try to keep your tone nonchalant,

but you can see the manager raise his eyebrow.

He pops the last bite of crust into his mouth, not arguing, but his face said otherwise.

"Ah, because you can go two days now without Healing," Taehyung nods.

The manager shakes his head.

"Two days is the limit. It's risky.

If the flight gets delayed due to weather or something else happens...

Well, I know you are strong in the bond, but Jungkook could fall sick without you if something goes wrong."

His tone is glum as he starts the car.

"Jungkook didn't... ask me to go," you whisper toward the window.

"He might feel it's a burden to you," he replies, shoulder checking and pulling out of the side lane.

That's true.

Jungkook has always been sensitive about how much he needed Healing.

It's just that... he sounded so sure that he would be fine.

Would it insult his pride if you doubted his confidence?

It couldn't hurt to ask gently, you decide.

You pull out your phone to text Jungkook,

frowning as Taehyung drops half a slice of pizza onto the car floor.

Of course, it lands topping side down,

sauce smearing the carpet.

Taehyung twitches, his eyes darting to his driving hyung, who was busy watching the road.

Taehyung puts a finger to his lips, wincing at you as he picks up the pizza and throws it onto a napkin.

He rubs at the sauce covered carpet with a wet wipe,

and you bite your tongue because it looks worse and worse as he spreads out the cheese and sauce.

You sigh, tearing your eyes away from the crime scene.

The poor manager would have a surprise later.

You stare down at your screen until you find a not so offensive question to ask.

Two days might be pushing it. We might feel too tired?

There's no reply until fifteen minutes later when the car pulls into the Bighit parkade.

You mean I might feel too tired.

But I'll be fine.

I meant both of us.

I need Healing too.

I know you don't need it the way I do.

Jungkook...

Don't worry.

I'm OK.

I'm JK.

You sigh and slam the car door behind you.

"He doesn't want me to go," you say quietly to the manager, as the three of you head for the elevator.

"I'm surprised," he replies, tilting his head.

"I guess I am too, a little," you admit.

"I don't understand Jungkookie sometimes. I really don't," Taehyung tuts.

He slithers his arm around your shoulder, pulling you in.

"Don't let him get to you. He's just moody sometimes."

The manager eyes Taehyung's arm around you as you all stand silently in the rising elevator.

"You two are friendly. Does that bother Jungkook?"

You blush at the blunt question.

"I... we're just friends."

The manager shrugs.

"But does Jungkook know that?"

Taehyung laughs.

"She told him, like a thousand times! We are elementary school friends.

But Jungkook still gets jealous ALL the time."

"I don't blame him, the bond makes people intense," the manager answers.

He makes a waving motion at Taehyung as the elevator doors open.

"Go to the studio, they're waiting for you."

Taehyung's eyes widen and his mouth drops open in shock.

The older guy sighs.

"Did you forget about rehearsal?"

"N-no," Taehyung replies, his eyebrows gathering together tragically at the accusation.

He headlocks you and rubs the top of his head against your temple back and forth,

messing up the entire left side of your hair.

He laughs and points at your head as he runs off.

"Hahahahahaa bye!"

His own head is a mess.

"You better run," you call after him.

You thread your fingers through your hair, rolling your eyes.

Turning to head for the coffee room and your laptop,

you pause only to see manager-nim still watching you.

"Jungkook is a very competitive boy," the older man smiles.

"Tae-Taehyung dropped pizza in the car," you immediately fluster.

He sighs.

"I know. There's always a fifty percent chance that he drops food in the car."

You fall into step together, and you know you can't put him off forever,

because his office is the other direction yet he's clearly walking with you.

Suddenly, at the intersection of hallways, a girl is crossing your path.

It's Adora.

It's Adora.

She wriggles her eyebrows at you as you fangirl gawk at her.

She lowers her head to bow at the older manager, and then disappears around a turn.

Manager-nim chuckles beside you as you walk backwards to watch her.

"This is a big company. We have a lot of talented and hard working people here."

You nod fervently.

"But with that, comes the need to know everybody's personalities,

so we can work well together."

You nod again.

He looks sideways at you.

"While he is very very talented, Jungkook is not the easiest person to get along with."

You slow down in front of the coffee room, and he walks right in, sitting down on the sofa.

You sit down across from him.

The manager looks at you seriously.

"Jungkook left home very young.

In a way, he's the most insecure, because he has to live up to the most.

Everyone expects a lot of him. He's the Golden Maknae. He can do everything. He's good at everything.

Everyone knows that.

So... Jungkook doesn't feel like he can make mistakes.

He's competitive and brave, yet sensitive and self-conscious.

He didn't grow up around a mother and father. So please forgive and understand him if he is a little possessive and jealous.

He's used to sacrificing and losing family and friends.

He is just scared he will lose you too."

He sighs when you say nothing.

"I heard your bond is complicated. It's not my place to tell you what to do.

But please just remember that even though Jungkook looks strong on the surface...

He is still a boy who lost everyone he loves at age 14."

"I will remember that," you whisper.

For some reason, his words brought tears to your eyes.

You lower your face so he wouldn't see them.

He pats you on the shoulder as he gets up and leaves the room.

You wipe your eyes.

You had always thought Jungkook jealous.

But you never stopped to consider why.

He lost all the people he loves

all the people who love him

when he was 14 years old.

Of course he was hurt.

Of course he was afraid.

Of course it made him possessive.

And while Jungkook had no reason to be jealous with you,

because even the thought of loving a man other than Jungkook

made you want to laugh,

sometimes people are simply just haunted by the pain of their past.

The fear and pain lives inside of them,

a part of who they are

forever.

You wipe your eyes again,

and pull out your phone.

You go straight to your conversation with Jungkook,

typing him a message,

and hitting send before you can get embarrassed and change your mind.

You'll go to Japan without me,

and we'll be fine without the Healing.

But just know that I'll miss you.

You blush alone in the coffee room as the message is immediately marked "read".

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