I'm sorry it's short but I wanted to give y'all something for being so patient with me 🖤
(or at least acting like you are lol)

The staged laughter coming from the tv was the only sound in Jackson's room.

Once the words left his mouth, he didn't make any moves to continue, so eventually I nodded to tell him I was listening.

All he did was nod back.

It was quite comical, honestly. But it was also one of the most awkward moments we'd ever shared.

Normally, the reason for our silence was due to one, or both, of us being pissed off at the other. Now, we were finally on the same page, we just...didn't know what to say.

It was almost like a silent agreement that yes, we needed to talk about this, but...do we have to?

Yes, not that long ago I broke down in front of him because I wanted answers, but did we really want to relive that day? Could we just pretend being on good terms now was enough?

No. I didn't only want answers, I needed answers if I wanted to continue anything with Jackson.

I needed to know what was going through his head to make him believe it was necessary to hurt me the way he did.

There was a good chance I wouldn't like the answer, but he was different now. I firmly believed people were capable of change, and I could see it happening before me.

But then there was still that small part of me that was holding onto the pain, and wanted him to know just how much he hurt me.

"Uh..." Jackson finally spoke, rubbing the back of his neck to show his discomfort. "Fuck, I don't know where to start. I-I didn't plan this far."

"The beginning sounds like a good start," I offered softly, nervously twisting my hands in my lap.

"The beginning..." Jackson nodded and rested his arms on his knees. "That's the thing — I don't know what the beginning was."

I knitted my brow, tilting my head in confusion. He looked at me before closing his eyes and sighing through his nose, dropping his head to look at his lap.

"You already know Papa and I got into...a disagreement that mornin'. There was a lot more that went into it, but I feel like that was the main reason I...did what I did."

Anger swirled in my chest at the mention of his father.

"I've been through some shit, Lee," Jackson shook his head, still looking down, "but that was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. It wasn't what I planned at all."

"Then why?" My voice cracked. "Why do it at all? What did he say to you that made you feel like you had to do that?"

"It wasn't what he said," he paused, looking up at the ceiling and blinking rapidly.

Fuck. Is he about to start crying again?

"It was...it was what it made me realize — how it made me feel," he breathed shakily as his glassy eyes met mine. "I felt worthless. Like I didn't deserve anything. Like all I was good at was fuckin' shit up."

I shook my head as tears filled my own eyes. "That's not true, Jax."

"I don't feel that way anymore," he gave me a sad smile and grabbed my hand, then he looked down as he ran his thumb across my knuckles. "Not all the time, at least."

"You should never feel that way," I spoke softly. "Things would really suck if you weren't here; I think that's the opposite of worthless."

Things would also be a little less aggravating and stressful. But way more boring and unsatisfying.

"See, that's another reason," Jackson laughed humorlessly, playing with my fingers. "I was tryin' to make sure things didn't suck if I wasn't around."

"W-what?" I asked, but it was hardly audible.

Jackson sighed and dropped my hand so he could run his through his hair. "Back then, I thought my only two options were to leave, or join the Kings — both risked hurting you, and I couldn't let that happen."

I snorted before I could stop myself, smacking a hand over my mouth. Jackson narrowed his eyes at me in confusion.

"I'm so sorry, I shouldn't laugh," I spoke through my hand, laughter obvious in my voice. "But that's the stupidest shit I've ever heard."

He furrowed his brow, jutting his head forward. "I'm sorry?"

I dropped my hand and cleared my throat, tilting my head down to look at him sarcastically through my lashes.

"You hurt me...to keep from hurting me? That's so stupid." I giggled softly as I straightened, then lifted my brows. "Do me a favor and never listen to my brother again, 'kay?"

Jackson shook his head, smiling down at his lap like he was thinking of some inside joke.

"Yeah, yeah I did. It wasn't because of Elliott, though," he sighed, looking at me with a small frown. "All he did was make me promise to keep you away from drugs and the Kings, which I planned on doin'. But that day, I realized I couldn't be close to you without you getting hurt. As cliché as it sounds...I thought it'd be easier for both of us if you hated me."

"That..." I pursed my lips and nodded slowly. "That does sound very cliché."

Jackson chuckled softly before reaching for my hand again. Then he breathed in deeply through his nose, blowing out shakily.

"It all sounds stupid now, but back then it made sense — I thought I was protecting you."

He leaned down, pulling my hand up to place a long kiss to my knuckles. He stayed with his back hunched, elbows on his knees, tilting his head to rest his cheek against the back of my hand to look at me.

I don't think I could've said anything if I tried; I was shocked beyond belief that he was telling me all of this.

And I could see even more in his eyes.

Pain. Guilt. Adoration. Love.

He straightened, gripping my hand tight as he pressed his lips together.

"Lee, I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry," his voice cracked at the end and my chest tightened. "I'm sorry for everything. And I'm sorry for how fuckin' long it's taken me to apologize."

My lip wobbled as I watched a tear slowly roll down his cheek, so I leaned forward and wrapped my arms around him.

He stiffened in shock before wrapping his arms around me in return, tucking his face into my neck.

"I forgive you." I squeezed my eyes shut as I tangled a hand in his hair, eyes burning with hot tears — while a burning urge began building inside me.

"I don't deserve it," he cried into my neck. "I don't deserve this — I-I don't deserve you."

The burning urge was building. It almost made me feel like I was going to throw up as I pulled away to look at him. Instead, the next three words came out in a choked sob.

"I love you."

We both stopped breathing.

Jackson's red, glassy eyes widened as his lips parted slightly.

Oh, fuck.

Embarrassment started running through my veins like ice cold water.

Oh, fuck. No, no, no.

"Y-you don't have to say anything — we can actually completely forget this if you want. You know what? Yeah, that sounds like a great idea, let's—"

Jackson cut me off by putting his hand on the back of my head, pulling me forward to roughly press his lips to mine.

I instantly melted into him, putting my hands on his chest before slowly trailing them up to lace my fingers behind his neck.

His lips tasted like a combination of salt and chocolate; a perfect, chaotic mixture of heartbreak and heaven.

He lightly ran his tongue across my bottom lip, so I opened for him, letting out a small whimper when he brushed his tongue against mine.

It started out fast and rough, but when he tilted my head to the side, the kiss turned slow and purposeful.

Like he was trying to tell me everything I knew he was too afraid to say.

One hand was in my hair, while his other arm wrapped around my lower back, pulling me closer, but I regretfully broke our lips apart.

"The door," I gasped out quietly, pressing my forehead to his. "Mom knows I'm in here."

Jackson pulled back to glance at the cracked door, his chest rising and falling quickly. Then he turned back to me, eyes searching mine.

"I couldn't care less right now," he said breathlessly. And before I could register what was happening, he was pushing me to lay down, laying on his side next to me.

He gave me a soft smile as he brushed my hair out of my face, tucking it behind my ear. "Eres tan perfecto."

I was no expert in Spanish, by any means, but I think anyone could guess what perfecto meant.

But before the goofy grin could completely form on my face, Jackson's lips were back on mine.

I gasped when he roughly pulled me against him, gripping my leg to drape it over his hip.

He gladly took advantage of my shock, slipping his tongue back into my mouth as he lightly trailed his hand up the back of my thigh.

Fire burned in my core as his fingers tickled closer and closer to my ass, and for once, I was wishing there was more there for him to grab.

That thought sobered me up a little and I found myself pulling back, desperately trying to catch my breath as he pressed his forehead to mine.

"You..." I panted before swallowing and trying again. "You deserve so much more than you think, Jax. You don't have to feel obligated to say it back, but I really do love you. My whole family loves you. We all care about you, and it's about damn time you learn to accept that."

Jackson pulled his head back to look at me, and I could see tears forming in his eyes again.

"You can't hate yourself for mistakes you made years ago; you aren't the same person anymore. And I'm so fucking proud of you — we all are."

I gave him a small smile as I wiped a tear that rolled onto his temple from the corner of his eye, and he placed his hand on top of mine to hold it there.

He was slowly leaning forward before we heard footsteps coming up the stairs, so we jumped apart and tried to pretend we were watching the tv.

A few seconds later, there was a light knock at the door before Mom walked in.

"Jackson, honey, how're you feeling?" She asked in a soothing tone.

Jackson sniffled and rubbed his eyes before smiling at her. "I'm good — uh, better."

She gave him a huge grin then glanced at the tv. "Ah, Friends makes everything better, right?"

Jackson gave me a quick, secret smile. "Yeah."

"Well, I came to see if y'all were feeling up to making some chocolate covered pretzels now, but don't feel like you have to."

"No, that sounds great," Jackson said as he climbed off the bed, gesturing for me to follow.

"Hey, Ma, before we go down there," Jackson nervously ran a hand through his hair, making me eye him curiously. "There's somethin' I wanna say."

"Of course, sweetheart, what is it?" Mom asked as she leaned against the doorframe.

He huffed out one of his almost laughs as he looked between us.

"I wanna take your daughter on a date."

I would love if y'all would go to Twitter and tell me your fave Skinny Love / Unlawful moment so far 🥺👉🏼👈🏼