"I'm sorry."

My eyes shot open wide as I sat up in my bed.

Kallie was standing at the door with a sullen look on her face, hugging her purse to her chest.

I let out a small sob of relief as she made her way over. "I'm sorry. I should've told you."

"You should have," she nodded curtly as she sat next to me. "But I shouldn't have reacted the way I did."

"So you don't hate me?" I asked in a whisper.

"A little," she lifted a shoulder before giving me a small smile. "I love you more, though."

I choked out a small laugh and rested my head on her shoulder, making her curls tickle my forehead. She lifted her other arm to wrap it around my neck, squeezing until I could barely breathe.

I didn't care though. She could strangle me to death and I'd die happy. I had my best friend back.

Everyone is going to leave eventually.

I cleared my throat as the chilling voice from this morning invaded my thoughts again, sitting up straighter when she pulled away.

"I have something for you," she said as she reached in her purse.

"Meal replacement powder?" I furrowed my brow, picking up one of the packets she tossed in my lap.

"Yep," she chirped. "You just mix it in water or milk — or if you're my mom, milk and ice cream. Technically it's for people trying to lose weight, but I figured it could help us move in the right direction."

My chest tightened when I flipped the packet over and saw the calories.

"Chad has an endless supply of these bad boys, so there's many more where that came from," she nodded at the pile in my lap.

"Okay," I said quietly, despite my irregular heartbeat. "I'll try it."

"Good, I wasn't really giving you a choice anyway," she smirked at me.

I forced out a nervous laugh as she scooted over to stretch her legs out.

"So, how was Thanksgiving?" Kallie asked, and I snorted.

"It was an unforgettable one, for sure."

"I missed it, didn't I?" She slumped her shoulders, and I nodded with a grimace.

"Dammit," she growled, smacking her leg dramatically.

"You missed a lot, actually," I said, laughing lightly at the disappointment on her face.

"Oh my gods, what else?" She asked, sitting up straighter.

"Well, I think more food was thrown than eaten," I pursed my lips, trying not to laugh as Jackson's pudding covered face flashed in my mind.

"No way! I missed a food fight? I bet your mom had a cow — no, more like the whole farm."

"Surprisingly, no," I said, flexing my foot to subtly relieve the sudden cramp in my calf. "Jackson can get away with anything, apparently."

"He started it?" She laughed as she fell back on the pillow Jackson was using earlier. "Why am I not surprised?"

Then she squinted her eyes and sniffed loudly. "Are you wearing cologne?"

"No," I said hesitantly before pressing my lips together.

Kallie slowly sat up, lifting the pillow to her nose, then dropped it in her lap with wide eyes.

"Did he...sleep here?"

"Let's not make a big deal about it, nothing happened," I said hastily as a shit eating grin spread across her face.

"Nothing happened," she deadpanned. "So you just...slept? There was no tonsil hockey or anything?"

I feigned a gag. "Ew, never say that again. And no, none of...that."

Kallie puffed out her cheeks as she blew out a long breath, and I fell back onto my pillow. "Well that's disappointing."

"I don't know what's wrong with me — I don't know what's wrong with him," I threw my hands up before dropping them on either side of me.

She looked down at me and raised her eyebrows expectantly, so I sighed.

"I wanted to kiss him, and I think he wanted to — we almost did, actually. Then I opened my damn mouth and ruined it all, and now he's mad at me."

"He's always mad," she waved a hand dismissively.

"No, you don't understand — you didn't see his face. I fucked up, and I'm desperate. Hell, I'm getting a freakin' cat!" I threw my hands over my face.

"Wow," Kallie said simply, and I peeked through my fingers.

"What?"

"You love him," she responded in a singsong voice, doing a little shimmy.

"What?" I sat up quickly with wide eyes.

"You —"

I held a hand up to stop her. "No, I heard you."

"Well?" She raised a brow. "You aren't denying it."

Love?

No, there's no way.

I care about him, that's it. I just don't want to see him sad.

Sure, his smile lights a fire in me, but that's just because it's nice. He has a nice smile. It probably does that to everyone.

"That's a big word," I frowned at her.

"Hm. L-O-V-E," she said thoughtfully, lifting a finger as she spoke each letter before holding them in front of me. "Only four letters — that's kindergarten level."

"We haven't even kissed," I smacked her hand away from my face.

"I think it's sweet," Kallie shrugged with a far away look in her eyes. "This way, you know you like him as a person, not just...you know."

"Personally, I don't see what the big fuss is with all that touchy-feely crap," she continued, scrunching her nose.

"The real dream is to have someone love you for you, not because you're good in bed. I mean, what does that even mean, anyway? I'm not a saint by any means, and I don't know — maybe I've just gotten the short end up the stick or something, but I'd choose talking to the person I love over wrestling in the sheets, any day. No doubt about it."

"Why do I feel like that was just a long way of telling me to keep my legs closed?" I asked with a small laugh.

"Maybe it was," she shrugged again, giving me a sly smile. "I gotta say though, those would be some pretty babies."

"I hate you," I deadpanned.

"You love me," she laughed, "just like you love —"

I smacked her with my pillow before she could finish.

"So, a cat, huh?" She asked, brushing her hair out of her face with a pout.

"His cat," I nodded. "Are you working Wednesday? I might need some help."

"So we're planning this big, romantic gesture, but you're trying to say you don't —"

"If you say that word one more time, I'm going to kick your ass," I cut her off with a glare.

"Fine, whatever. I don't go in until four Wednesday, so we might have time. If you're really trying to win him over though, we have some work to do," she said with a mischievous grin, reaching over to pick up my hair, inspecting the frizzy ends.

"Do you trust me?"

I looked away from Kallie's bathroom mirror and turned to her.

"Do I have a choice?"

"Good answer," she pointed her scissors at me with a smirk.

"Just tell me when you're done," I said, squeezing my eyes shut.

"Stop freaking out," she reached from behind me and smacked my cheek, so I snapped my eyes open to glare at her in the mirror.

"Remember when Jesse said I should be an artist?" She waited for me to nod. "Well, I've been watching a bunch of videos since then, and I think I've found my calling. So just close your eyes, relax, and let me work my magic."

"Okay," I whispered hesitantly, closing my eyes again.

I flinched when I heard the first snip.

"Don't move," Kallie ordered, and I bit my lip. "When's the last time you got a haircut?"

"I don't know. I got a trim a couple months ago, maybe?" I scrunched my brow together, keeping my eyes closed. "Why?"

She hummed as she snipped some more.

Is it really that bad?

"How did you hide it for so long?" She asked quietly. "I mean, how did no one notice? How did I not notice?"

"It was easy for a while," I frowned and my stomach twisted uncomfortably.

She paused her movements, so I opened my eyes to peek at her. She was already looking at me in the mirror, eyes shining with unshed tears.

"I should've noticed sooner — I mean, look at you! I'm a terrible friend."

I didn't know what she was seeing, but all I saw was too much. Too much roundness on my face. Too much flab on my arms. Too much stomach hanging over my pants. Too much...me.

"You're not a terrible friend. Would a terrible friend be doing this?" I pointed to my hair, and she choked out a laugh.

"Ask yourself that again when I'm finished."

"Okay!" Kallie piped up, making me jump slightly and open my eyes. "I think I'm done."

I watched her cock her head to the side, admiring her handy work, before I forced my eyes down to look at myself.

"Wow."

"Do you like it?" She bit her lip nervously, watching me through the mirror.

I ruffled my hair with my hands, a joyful laugh bubbling up when it bounced lively. It was barely grazing my shoulders now, but it looked fuller than it had in a long time.

The ends were kind of choppy, but not in a bad way. It was effortlessly stylish — all I had to do was run my hands through it, and it looked perfectly tousled.

"Definitely your calling," I nodded approvingly, and she released her lip from her teeth, stretching them into a big smile.

I looked back at myself, noticing how the shorter hair made my neck look longer, slimmer.

Normally that would make me ecstatic, but now my gut twisted as the girl from my dream flashed in my mind.

Soon you'll be just as beautiful as me.

Pushing the fear down, I matched Kallie's smile.

"I love it."

Kallie pulled up to my house around ten that night, turning to me when she parked.

"There's something I have to tell you," she bit her lip, and I raised my eyebrows at her.

"I'm going on a date tomorrow," she all but squealed.

"With who?" I tried to copy her excitement, but it proved to be harder than I thought.

After we finished my hair, I was thoroughly interrogated about my habits. Kallie was well prepared with notes and everything.

There were lots of shared tears, and many breaks to calm myself before I had a panic attack, but I promised I'd be as open and honest as she wanted me to be. And I was.

I couldn't decide which one of us was in more pain by the end of it, but after we watched a comedy to kill the tension, we were okay again.

I was just drained.

"Well, he's a little older — tall, luscious brown hair. Oh," she snapped her fingers and pointed at me with a wide grin. "You know him, you call him dumb ass most of the time."

"Elliott?"

"Yes!" She bounced in her seat.

"Oh my God!" I was suddenly full of energy again. "When did this happen? How?"

"He texted me last night and asked me!"

Last night? He was drunk last night.

Shit. He better remember this.

"That's great, Kal! I'll be waiting for every detail — aside from, you know, the tonsil hockey," I cringed as I used her disgusting phrase.

"Oh, don't you worry. You'll get the full play by play," she laughed at my disturbed face.

"Ew," I grimaced as I opened my door. "Thanks for the haircut, I love you."

"Love you more!" She called out before I shut the door.

The tv and lamp by the couch were the only lights on when I walked in.

Mom turned to me and smiled. Jackson was sitting a couple feet from her, never looking away from the tv.

I went over to the other couch and plopped down next to Elliott, giving him a knowing grin.

"What's wrong with your face?" He squinted his eyes at me.

"Nothing," I laughed and shook my head.

"Brylee, your hair looks amazing," Mom gushed, so I turned to smile at her, running my hands through it.

"Thanks, Kallie did it," I said happily, and my eyes flicked over to Jackson.

The corner of his mouth lifted slightly, but his eyes still stayed glued to the tv.

Then Dad walked in, sighing as he buckled his belt. "They're having problems with the computer system, so I have to run over to the hotel. Oh, hey sweetheart. Your mother told me the news!"

I widened my eyes, and Mom quickly cleared her throat before he could continue.

"That you were getting your hair cut," she clarified. "Doesn't it look great, honey?"

"Uh, yeah," Dad said slowly, leaning over the back of the couch to ruffle my hair. "Beautiful."

"Thanks, Dad," I laughed lightly as I fixed it.

"Sorry I can't stay for the movie, duty calls," he continued, groaning as he headed for the door. "Goodnight guys."

"So, what're we watching?" I asked after everyone said bye to Dad, tucking my legs underneath me.

"I made the mistake of letting Jackson pick, so horror it is," Mom sighed dramatically, looking at Jackson. "I don't see how you sleep at night after watching this stuff."

"I manage," he shrugged, giving her a halfhearted smile, making me raise my eyebrows.

"Well," she reached over and patted his leg before standing. "I'm going to the bathroom before we start; be right back."

I watched her walk down the hall before turning to Elliott, giving him the same grin as before.

"Would you stop lookin' at me like that? It's weird," he covered my face with his hand, lightly pushing me back.

Ignoring his remark, I scooted even closer to him when he dropped his hand, bumping his shoulder. "I heard about your plans tomorrow."

"Yeah, you know what? I think I want some popcorn for this movie," he said enthusiastically as he pushed me away again, standing up.

Well, at least he remembers.

"You can't ignore me forever!" I called after him as he walked into the kitchen.

"I can try!" He yelled back before I heard the squeaky voice pantry door open.

I rolled my eyes, glancing over at Jackson as he pulled his phone out of his pocket. The light illuminated his features as he unlocked it.

"You're a liar," I mimicked his teasing tone from this morning.

He glanced at briefly before returning to his phone. I chewed the inside of my cheek as I watched his fingers dance across the screen.

Who the hell has he been texting so much?

"I'm sorry," I breathed out when he finally dropped his phone on the cushion next to him.

He propped his foot up on the coffee table, looking forward for a moment before turning to me.

"Noted."

"What's noted?" Mom asked from behind me, making me jump.

"Lee was just warnin' me that she's probably gonna scream like a little girl during the movie," Jackson smirked as Mom sat back down.

So I'm still Lee. That's a good sign, right?

No, that doesn't mean anything. He used to call me that just to get on my nerves.

"Oh whatever," I scoffed. "I love scary movies."

Yeah, everyone knows that's a lie.

I'll watch every cheesy scary movie ever made if he wants me to, though. I'll even pretend to be scared, so he'll hold me.

Suddenly I was wishing Mom and Elliott weren't here, so I could do just that.

"You'll love this one then," Jackson said, voice dripping with sarcasm.

"What's it called again? Rings?" Mom asked, settling into the couch.

"The Ring," Elliott chimed in, walking back to the couch with a bowl of popcorn in one hand, soda can in the other. "He's made me watch it a bazillion times already — tv static still freaks me out."

"Don't be such a cobarde," Jackson rolled his eyes. "It was made in 2002, it's not that scary."

"Everyone knows older movies are scarier," Elliott defended himself, throwing a piece of popcorn at him.

Jackson flinched as it hit him in the forehead before falling in his lap. He picked it up and tossed it in his mouth. "Thanks."

"Let's just hurry up and start this thing before I change my mind," Mom said, turning off the lamp and gesturing for Jackson to hit play.

As the room went dark for a moment, I reached over and grabbed a handful of popcorn from the bowl in Elliott's lap. He didn't notice until he heard my loud crunching.

"Hey! This is mine," he snapped as the tv screen lit up the room, letting me see his glare.

"You gave him some," I retaliated, pointing at Jackson, who had a half smile as he watched me shove more popcorn in my mouth.

Mom hushed us, so Elliott snapped his mouth shut, and I munched on the popcorn with a proud smile.

I'd only had half of that granola bar this morning, so I wasn't too upset about a little bit of popcorn. Aside from all the salt, I was actually enjoying it.

Keeping my eyes on the tv, I reached over and grabbed Elliott's soda from him.

"I swear to God, B," Elliott whispered harshly, snatching the can from me after I took a sip, making soda slosh on his arm. "Get your own."

I just shrugged and turned back to the tv as he scrubbed his arm with his shirt.

Mom didn't even make it thirty minutes into the movie, before saying it was 'too much' and went to her room.

I was starting to agree with her.

There hadn't been any moments that made me laugh at the bad acting. There had been many that made me look away, though.

Fuck this movie.

And fuck Jackson for laughing every time I jump.

"So," Jackson piped up when the credits rolled across the screen. "Did you love it?"

"I hated it," I said seriously, looking over at