Chapter Ten - That's a Rough Version

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"I don't think we can be friends anymore," I wrinkled my nose at the maraschino cherry ice cream he was currently licking out of a cone.

He winked at me before the cashier handed me my chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream cone. My eyes widened in anticipation. The last time I had this flavor was when Aaron and I got into a fight and he went to the ice cream store to grab me a pint of my favorite. He came back with it and handed it over with a brash "here". I just remember how routine our fights had become at that point. He would flirt with someone, I'd get upset, he'd ignore me for a couple days and then get me a gift - ice cream, flowers, chocolate. All of it made me feel cheap. We never resolved our problems. We covered them up and hung out with our friends, pretending to have moved on. I guess it catches up with everyone.

I reached into my wallet to pay for the ice cream before Alexander handed cash to the woman behind the counter.

"Please, let me pay. You paid the last time we were together!" I insisted, trying to pull his arm back before he handed the cash over.

He laughed, handing the cash over and dragging my hand along with his in the process. "You'll catch the next one."

"You said that the last time." I crossed my arms in frustration.

"Maybe one day I'll mean it."

I shook my head at him before leading us outside to sit on a bench. Alexander sat next to me on the bench and we enjoyed our cones in silence. My mind was still swirling with what had happened with Aaron. I wondered where Heather was waiting for him for her pint of ice cream. Not a month ago, that was me. It was the most abnormal thing to have to cut yourself off from someone you knew for two years, having to make the distinction between them being yours, to them being nothing at all.

My mind traveled to what they would do when Aaron got to Heather's house. My heart clamped up. Aaron had never been very affectionate with me. He wasn't fond of public displays of affection in the least. He preferred to hold rather separate lives and I understood because we were always around the same friends. But, when the girl he just happened to be sleeping with was also in that same group, it made things awkward.

"What's on your mind over there?" Alexander asked quizzically.

I turned to face him, "I want to hear step two." I stated confidently.

He raised an eyebrow at me, "I've never been so proud," he smiled gently at me.

"Shut up," I rolled my eyes but a smile tugged at my lips. "Where are those papers that you're perpetually hiding?"

He stood up biting the last piece of his cone before pulling out his wallet and opening it to tug out a piece of paper that had been folded and re-folded numerous times. He sat back down next to me.

He cleared his throat. "Rule number two: set healthy emotional boundaries with people. Each time you say yes to something you don't want to do, you're giving the other person power over you."

My mouth gaped open, "It does not say that," I grabbed the paper out of his hands and it stared me in the face.

"The first step to admitting you have a problem is to say it out loud." Alexander teased.

"It is pretty much hitting the nail on the head," I admitted glumly. I never wanted to believe that I had a problem confronting my problems. But recent events had forced me to admit that this wasn't a personality trait. It was a flaw that I was determined to work on.

He snatched the paper back, "Well it won't be for long." He folded it back up and placed it back in his wallet. "So the next time that ass comes up to you, speaking in a tone that implies things are your fault, what would you say?" He gazed at me encouragingly.

"I'm not the one who cheated." I murmured quietly. I felt lighter just saying the words out loud, like a weight had been lifted from my mind and my heart.

"My God," he began grinning, "this must be what it feels like to see your child walk."

I shoved his shoulder, laughing while I finished off my ice cream cone.

"What are you up to today?" Alexander asked.

I shrugged, "Not much. My mom left for Paris this morning and Avery's hanging with Nathan."

"Great. Do you want to come with me?" He asked standing up and extending his hand to me.

I smiled, "Sure." I placed my hand in his and he pulled me up. Something about holding his large, warm hand made butterflies appear in my stomach. His fingers were rough, no doubt from all the wood carvings he had worked on, but there was a gentleness to his touch that always surprised me. Aaron had been rough all around - in his actions and his words - and he never liked holding hands, especially in public.

I was more than happy not to go home to an empty house. It was times like this when I missed my old friends. They were always hanging out so it felt like I always had support around me. But, lately I wasn't missing that so much anymore. In fact, I was starting to see that the group had its flaws as well. And they weren't there for me when I needed them the most, which was the biggest flaw of all. You should be able to count on your friends.

Alexander didn't let go of my hand as he led me to his bike. He tugged the extra helmet off his bike and without hesitation, gently slipped it on over my head. He did the same with his before swinging his leg over the front and helping me climb onto the back. My arms slithered around Alexander and I clamped my eyes shut in anticipation. The bike revved forward and I clung onto Alexander tighter.

Eventually, the bike began to slow down until it had completely stopped. I opened my eyes to see that we were at an apartment complex. I climbed off the bike before removing my helmet and placing it back on the bike.

"Where are we?" I asked curiously.

"My place," Alexander replied before reaching for my hand and tugging me across the courtyard into the building. He held the door open for me with one arm and I walked in before him, hands still interlaced.

"I should warn you that I live with two roommates." Alexander cautioned as we got on the elevator. He pushed the bottom to third floor.

I nodded, "You and Nathan live together right?" I recalled Avery mentioning as much once. The elevator dinged and we walked off.

"Yeah and Bryan. He's a little on the quiet side, just so you're aware. It's nothing personal." Alexander dropped my hand and took his key out before opening the door for me. He stood aside and let me walk in before him.

The apartment looked as though three men were living together. The kitchen and living room seemed to take up the majority of the space, with three doors on each end. There was a grey couch in the middle of the living room. A black coffee table was littered with pizza boxes, beer cans, and energy drinks. The TV was on and playing some sports channel and a tattered reading chair was shoved into the corner. Sitting on the reading chair was a tall and lanky looking man with shaggy brown hair, a loose flannel shirt and grey sweatpants.

"Hey man," Alexander greeted at who I presumed was Bryan. "This is Olivia."

"Nice to meet you," I called.

Bryan glanced over at me and nodded before turning back to the TV.

"Come on," Alexander called as he walked into a door on the far end of the kitchen.

We walked into what could only have been Alexander's room. The room was brimming with unique wood carvings from animal figures to faces of people I'd never met. He had sketches hanging in frames of the most beautiful buildings I'd ever seen. The floor was cluttered with books piled on top of each other from Tchaikovsky to Hemingway to Bronte. 

I sat down at the chair at his desk while he moved papers on his bed so he could sit. I smiled at the room, "This room looks like you." I could imagine him carving his art pieces or studiously sketching his buildings. He really was so talented. 

I swiveled in the chair before my eyes caught a sketch that was half hidden under a drawing of a sky scraper. I pulled it out and my eyes landed on what looked like the rough tracings of my face. I touched the pencil work gently. He had outlined my heart shaped face and my brown hair draped around my face elegantly, rather than limply like what I was used to seeing. My lips were full and tugged upwards, rather than clasped tightly to avoid speaking. My eyes were glimmering, rather than scared and cautious. This version of me looked beautiful. 

Alexander noticed where my eyes had landed before he jumped up off the bed and snatched it from my hands, "Er, that's a rough version." He scratched the back of his head in embarrassment.

"You drew me." I stated dumbfoundedly. 

"I did."

"It looks beautiful." 

"You are." 

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