"So you guys just hung out?" Avery asked, her eyes laser focused on painting her fingernails a bright red. She sat on my bed with her long legs folded beneath her.
"Yeah," I replied from the floor while painting mine white. I didn't tell Avery about Alexander's art because I felt like it would betray his confidence, but boy did I want to scream about his accomplishments to everyone I saw. It was that amazing. I was still mesmerized by the intricate carvings and the fine details that he had put into his work. "How was the rest of your evening with Nathan? When we left you it was looking pretty serious." That was one way of putting it.
"I told him I loved him," she told me, grinning giddily.
"Avery, that's amazing! What did he say?" I was so happy for her that she had found someone who was good to her and for her. It was so like Avery to say that she loved someone first. She was fearless. She didn't worry whether it was reciprocated, she just knew how she felt and wasn't afraid to express it. Avery was a strong woman and not many guys that she'd dated in the past were able to handle that. I envied her confidence and the way she could just say what was on her mind. It was amazing.
"That he loved me too." She sighed dreamily.
"I'm so happy for you guys!" I reached up and wrapped my arms around her in a hug, forgetting about my wet nail polish for a moment.
"So how are you feeling about things?" She asked raising an eyebrow.
"What kind of things?"
"Aaron things. Alexander things?" She asked mischievously.
"There are no Alexander things." I blurted quickly. "And Aaron things just are what they are. There's nothing more to be said about it." The truth was that I was just now coming to terms with the fact that things between Aaron and I were likely over for good. I still missed the moments that we'd never have again - laughing together, driving together, going out for our morning coffee at Jitters. It killed me that he was so okay. That he could hang out with our friends like everything was normal. That he could hang out with her like nothing had happened.
"Did I tell you I saw Heather at the restaurant after you left?" Avery blew on her newly painted nails.
I paused, "No. What did she say?"
"The same thing they all say," Avery frowned, referencing our old friend group, "He didn't mean it, she should take him back, think about the friend group." She rolled my eyes. "So I told her if she ever came up to me again I'd send everyone that video of her talking about sleeping with Stacey's boyfriend that one time," she laughed. "You should have seen her face. Fifty shades of red."
I laughed. Avery was such a strong person. I wished I had her strength sometimes. Her phone beeped and she looked down at it with a giddy smile so I assumed it was Nathan. She placed her phone down and glanced at me. "So your mom's gone again?" She inquired.
"Yeah. To Paris and then checking out random spots with her friends." I blew on my own newly finished nails trying to dry them more quickly.
"You should get your own place," Avery insisted.
"Honestly, I'd feel too bad leaving my mom on her own. I know she has her flaws but she's still my mom. She has no one else." I explained twisting the cap to the polish bottle closed.
"You're too nice, Olivia. She's hardly home and when she is, she shows no interest in you or in what you're doing. Does she even call you when she's away traveling 300 days out of the year?" Avery sighed in frustration.
"Of course," I lied automatically. Avery shot me a skeptical look.
"All I'm saying is that it's okay to do selfish things that make you happy. This is a repeating pattern that spilled over into your relationship with Aaron, too." Avery stated matter-of-factly.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"It's supposed to mean that you romanticize all these relationships. Aaron was an ass to you the majority of the time but he'd pick up the ice cream that you asked him to and you thought he was your knight in shining armor. You let people treat you a certain way because you don't think you deserve better. You let your mom talk down to you and mock your future job and your clothes because you think she has a right to. She doesn't. Aaron doesn't. No one does." Avery's phone dinged again.
I thought about what she was saying. Aaron wasn't a perfect boyfriend, but he was good to me for the most part. He listened most of the time and he was never awful to me. Sure, we had our problems, but who didn't? I thought back to those times that we hung out on the couch together and it was true that I had to nag him to sit with me or spend time with just the two of us, but we made the time in the end, until he cheated that is. "Is that Nathan?" I asked.
"He wants to meet up with me," she replied typing away on her phone.
"You should go." I jumped up and smoothed out my short shorts.
"Are you sure you're okay?" Avery asked skeptically.
"Of course. Go make out with your boyfriend. Tell him you love him again." I teased.
She sighed dreamily. "I'll check in with you later," She chirped as she walked out of my bedroom.
I tidied my room after she left, spending time dusting out the tops of the trim at the edges of my room. If I saw myself dusting the trims of my room on a Saturday afternoon, I'd feel an abundant amount of pity for myself. I reached into my pocket and pulled out my phone.
Olivia: What are you up to?
I threw my phone onto my bed and huffed. He probably wouldn't reply. I wouldn't expect him to. My phone dinged and I leaped across my bed for it excitedly, my heart thumping in my chest. Dr. Alexander flashed on my screen.
Alexander: Forever sketching. You?
Olivia: Contemplating ice cream to combat the boredom.
Alexander: I'm down.
Olivia: What about your sketching?
Alexander: It can wait.
I grinned giddily as I ran down the stairs and walked out the door, beginning the short walk to the ice cream shop. There would be no way Aaron would be there. He only ever got ice cream for me when I begged him to and everyone else in the group was too carb conscious to walk into an ice cream store. I opened the door to the ice cream shop and I leaned against the glass counter glancing at the different flavors.
"Olivia, hey." Aaron's voice rang loud and true. I froze in my spot. There he stood in front of me, a pint of ice cream in his hands. Aaron hated chocolate, yet there he was with a tub of rocky road.
"Hi," I squeaked desperately wishing I could evaporate from where I stood.
"Of course you're getting ice cream," He grinned at me.
"What are you doing here? You hate ice cream." My heart clenched in anticipation.
"It's for uh-Heather," He mumbled at me.
I nodded, "That's great!" This would be my burial spot. I'd die here. I couldn't escape from this.
"Are you dating now?" He asked me, frowning in my direction.
"Um-" I began just as I heard the rev of an engine. I didn't think I'd ever be happier to hear that noise in my life. I wanted to run out and kiss that god-awful bike. The bell chimed and in walked Alexander looking concerned.
He walked over to me and swung his arm over my shoulder. I just stood there, shocked at Alexander, dreading Aaron's reaction. My heart thumped.
"Hey baby," Alexander drawled pulling me into his side, "Sorry, I took so long."
"Ah- I," All I could do was stutter. I had no words.
"Well, I guess you got over us quickly, eh, Olivia?" Aaron lashed out before turning on his heel and walking out.
I twisted to look at Alexander, frowning at him. I pulled away from his arm and put space between us. "What the hell was that?"
He lifted an eyebrow, "I'm pretty sure that was a rescue."
"A rescue! Aaron was so upset."
"So what, Olivia?" Alexander asked me. I knew he was goading me on. I knew he wanted me to tell him off. So instead I just walked out of the store. I heard Alexander's steps behind me. "Say what you're feeling, Olivia! Just fucking shout it."
I turned around abruptly to glare at him, "That's not who I am, Alexander."
"See, I don't think that's true. I think you're desperate to say something - anything. I'm sorry if you weren't happy with how that went down but Aaron doesn't deserve any of your kindness. He's a fucking asshole and you deserve so much better."
"You don't know me, Alexander!" I fumed at him. My chest was heaving from anger at this point.
"I think I'm beginning to." He said quietly. He reached out to touch my waist, "And I'm sorry I upset you."
My heart was still thumping with anger, but my demeanor softened at his words. "You shouldn't have done that."
"I'm sorry," He repeated sincerely.
I sighed and looked away, "I suppose that could have gone worse." I admitted remembering Aaron's face, red with anger. I got a little pleasure from that look.
"There you go," Alexander grinned. "I'll wait for that thank you," he winked at me.
I rolled my eyes at him, "Sorry I freaked out at you." I still had to remind myself that Aaron didn't have a right to get upset. That he wasn't mine to worry about anymore. It would just take time.
"I was promised an ice cream date though,"
I laughed, "ice cream, no date."
"We'll work out the details later."
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