19 - Megan: Last August

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Megan thought her ex might trip and break a bone by the reaction he gave. She told herself she had no reason to feel humiliated. She knew for a fact he had not been living the life of a monk since their divorce. The events leading to their divorce surfaced. Letting her mind go backwards always led to anger, which wasn't healthy for anyone, especially her children.

She knew he was seeing someone, because the twins had mentioned her. In the past, he kept his social life away from the twins, but apparently this one must be serious. Megan was tired of hearing her name. "Victoria, Victoria." Every time they came home it was, "Victoria played Super Mario Bros with me," or "Victoria braided my hair."

Megan had grown very jealous of this Victoria. It didn't help that she pictured her as perfect where Megan was lacking - flat, stretch mark free tummy, beautiful hair rather than hers which couldn't seem to decide on a color. Was it brown or red? Her mother called it auburn, but Megan always wished it was blonde. Then there was the skin, she probably had smooth, milky skin and not a face full of freckles. They were adorable on Sophie, who unfortunately looked like her. Luckily her hair was more brown than red. Nick was the spitting image of his father. It was strange how that worked out. She used to wonder who their third child would look like, but that would never happen.

The weeks she spent with Evan had helped her feel better about herself. It was nice to know that a man could find her appealing. He didn't seem bothered that pregnancy and breastfeeding had ruined her breasts forever. If they disgusted him, he would have avoided them, but he didn't. She was sure that Victoria's were perfect.

What bothered her about Victoria was that she was with her children when Megan was missing them. She was afraid she would become their stepmother, and Megan didn't want to share them. It was hard enough sharing them with their father.

The weeks flew, and school was about to start. She had to explain that although her children were not with her on Sunday night, he couldn't come over. "I have to be at work at seven-thirty in the morning. They're with their father, because I work and they don't start school until the next day. I'll have next Friday and Monday off for a long Labor day weekend."

For Megan, summer always ended in fits and spurts. Teachers reported back on the last Monday of August. After four, typically very hot days, she would have four days off. She would take the kids to the beach after school to hang onto the last days of summer. The feel of fall came early and although early September could be very warm and the ocean temperatures peaked, the nights quickly cooled down.

Driving back across the marsh on the first day of school was always emotional. It was like leaving wonderland for the real world. It seemed crazy, because she crossed the marsh multiple times during summer. All shopping took place on the other side, and trips to the library and anything else they needed to do aside from the beach.

Megan was in bed with Evan on the Sunday of Labor Day weekend, when he told her he was leaving.

"I thought you would be here through Columbus Day."

"I got an offer to work at a resort in the Bahamas. I have been trying to get a job there for years. A friend pulled some strings for me, but I have to start right away."

"Well, that's great."

Megan had been looking forward to some bonus time with Evan in her bed on the weekends through mid-October.

"This resort is busy year round, so it's more permanent. I won't ever come back to Maine."

"I'm not sure I ever thought you would. So you never see yourself settling down."

"I might stay in the Bahamas, but I'm not one to settle. The whole family thing that you have, that's not for me. Hanging with you this summer showed me that kids are a burden. Even that guy who runs, all he does is work and hang out with his kids. Even part time, I never want that."

He was talking about Peter, but even he had a girlfriend.

"Don't worry. I told you I'm on birth control. We've had fun and neither of us expected anything more than that." She assured him. "When do you go?"

"Tuesday."

"Tonight is it then. We might as well make the most of it."


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