The flight back seemed faster and we were back by late evening. We all headed home and straight to our rooms.

Despite feeling physically and emotionally exhausted, I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep. So I changed into a pair of sweats and thick sweater before grabbing a book and heading to the balcony.

I pulled the blanket off the chair and wrapped myself in it. I laid back in chair and started reading. I had gotten half way through the book when Joshua's balcony door opened and he walked out.

He jumped over the small gap and landed on my side.

"Why don't you enter through the room door like a normal person?" I asked as I started reading again.

"You wouldn't open it."

"So this way you force your presence on me?"

He didn't say anything and I looked up from my book. He had walked back into my room and was poking around. I heard the distinct sound of fire crackling and realized he had started the fireplace.

The cold wind blew and ruffled my hair. I discarded the blanket and headed back inside. I shut and locked the door before joining Joshua on the floor by the fireplace.

He had dragged my blankets and pillow on the floor and made a makeshift bed.

"Please don't tell me you plan on sleeping here again." I asked wishfully.

He smiled and laid down on the blankets. "Goodnight Amira."

"Why do you insist on sleeping in the same room as me? I told you a thousand times that I'm fine on my own."

"I'm going to do what it takes to not let you have nightmares, even if it means sleeping in the same room."

"But why?" I asked.

He opened his eyes and looked at me. "Because despite what you think, I do care about you."

I felt my heart beat faster at his words. We stayed that way staring at one another before he closed his eyes and tried to sleep.

I was about to get up when I realized that last night, not only had I slept, I didn't have any nightmares.

But what was so different about last night? I mean Joshua slept in the same room before and even slept beside me before. So what was so different.

When his arm brushed against my leg, I suddenly realized what it was. Last night was the first time that he held me while we slept. Every other time he has just been in the room.

What was so special about this man? By being in the room, I could fall asleep and by holding me, I didn't have any nightmares.

Than I had the stupidest idea. I tried to talk myself out of it but realized I wanted one more nights sleep without any nightmares. I would go back to kicking him out from tomorrow.

So pushing my inhibitions aside, I not only laid down beside him, but I grabbed his arm and wrapped it around my shoulders. I laid my head down and his chest and closed my eyes.

I felt him freeze when I did that and also heard his heart rate picking up. For a while he didn't even move. But slowly he put his other arm around me and pulled me in closer.

For the first time in months, I felt safe. With that thought, I went into a deep and peaceful sleep.

*******************************
The next morning, I awoke both refreshed and peaceful. I tightened my hold on Joshua and sighed contently.

When I looked, I saw he was already awake and looking at me. He brushed the strands of hairs away from my face.

"Good morning princess."

He was looking at me so intensely that I began to feel uncomfortable.

"Morning." I said as I untangled myself from him and got up.

I ran a hand through my hair and walked into the closet to get a pair of clothes before heading to shower.

"So there is a reason you decided to spoon me last night?" He asked as he leaned against the door.

I felt my cheeks heat up but continued looking for something to wear.

"I didn't have any nightmares the other night when you held me. I wanted just one more night without them." I said.

Might as well be truthful, he won't believe anything else. I grabbed a wool sweater dress and walked out.

"You can show yourself out," I said as I headed in to the bathroom.

After my shower, I quickly got dressed and went to the kitchen. There was room service trays on the table.

"Really? One day I don't make breakfast and you order room service?"

They all shrugged and went back to eating.

"Honestly, is Joshua the only one who knows how to cook?" I asked.

"Well, you two sure know lots about each other. How many times has he cooked you breakfast?" Lucas asked.

"Well considering how you eat everything she makes and barely leave any for her, I'd say quiet often." Joshua said as he walked into the room. He grabbed Lucas's plate and started eating.

Lucas grabbed Elliot's plate who in turn grabbed Johnathan and he grabbed Ron's. Then they each grabbed their plates back.

Rolling my eyes, I grabbed a plate and filled it with food before passing it to Ron when his got taken away again.

I didn't feel that hungry so I just grabbed a banana nut muffin and sat down.

"So what's the plan for today?" I asked as I started eating my muffin.

"We have to input the trips data in the system and then we're free for the rest of the day." Lucas explained.

"Yeah but I don't feel like just spending it at home, so I'm going to go visit a few of my parents old friends." Ron said.

Johnathan explained he'd be doing the same thing.

"Lucas and I are going to go get some suits for tomorrow and then probably just head over to a club." Elliot said as he shrugged his shoulders.

I nodded my head as they all stood up and headed out.

"I've got office work, so don't bother me for the day." Joshua said standing up and leaving.

I guess that means I'm on my own for today. I quickly cleared the mess away and messaged house keeping to take the food trays away. I decided to pick a dress for tomorrow and then do some office work as well.

I spent over an hour deciding on a dress. I had pulled out nearly half my closet trying to find one. I was growing frustrated and started throwing my dresses around. When I was about to throw another one, one dress caught my eye.

It was a tan coloured lace chiffon dress with a high neck bodice. It also had a thigh slit. The dress was perfect and I rushed to try it on. But before I did that I cleaned up the mess I made of my closest.

When everything was back in order, I stripped down and put on the dress. However I couldn't reach around back all the way to pull up the zipper. I was struggling and my arms were starting to get tired.

Suddenly I felt a hand come up and pull the zipper up for me. I swirled around and tripped on the bottom of my dress. Joshua's arms circled around my waist keeping me upright.

"Easy there princess," he said as he brushed hair away from my face.

"I thought you were working and didn't want to be disturbed."

He smiled. "It's not disturbing if I'm the ones who's doing it." He pulled me closer until our noses were almost touching.

"This dress is perfect, do you plan to wear it tomorrow?" He asked.

Although I couldn't get any words out as he was tracing lines on my exposed skin.

"Cat got your tongue princess?" He asked smiling innocently.

I hated being teased, especially by him. Well Collins, two can play at that game.

I placed my hands on his chest and leaned up on my toes. I saw the smile drop from his face when I hovered by his mouth.

"My my, how the tables have turned huh Collins?"

I turned my face until it was near his ear. "I quite like this position, don't you?"

I felt him freeze and I knew I had accomplished what I wanted to. With that done, I pushed him away.

"Well this was fun, but I've got some office work to do now too. So if you'll excuse me," I said as I walked back into my closet to change.

I closed the door and started taking off the dress. This time around, it was easier to get the zipper down. I changed back into my clothes and put the dress away.

When I opened my closet door, Joshua was still there in the room, sitting on my bed.

I just rolled my eyes and went to my desk to start working. I logged onto my company's server and looked through the new files.

A message in one file caught my attention. When I read it I realized it was from Cameron.

Amira, I know you're reading this. Please, where ever you are and whatever you're doing, just come home. I miss you, we all miss you. Mom and dad are miserable without you. I can't stand knowing you're alone and hurting. Just please, come back.

I felt my eyes tear up at the message. He sounded miserable. Uncle David and Aunt Monica missed me too. I wanted nothing more to go back and be with them but I had a job to do and I won't leave until it's done.

Although, it wouldn't hurt to call Cameron once. I just wanted to hear his voice. I missed my best friend more than anything.

"Who's Cam?"

I jumped a little in my chair when Joshua spoke from behind me. I quickly logged out and closed the computer.

"No one." I said getting up.

He grabbed my arm and pulled me back. "That's the second time I heard of him, so who is he?"

"Like I said," ripping my arm from his hold, "no one. Especially not someone you need to know about."

"Really? After all this time, you still can't trust me to tell me anything? I told you my entire life story and I only know the basics about you." He yelled as he followed me.

"I never asked you to tell me anything so I'm not obligated to tell you either. Besides, if he was someone you need to know about, you would. Now let it go."

I walked up to the library and looked around for a book to read.

"This is my house princess and if I ask you something then you have to tell me."

He blocked my path as I tried to get past him.

"Fine, if that's the case, then I'll just leave." I stated.

I tried to head back down but he grabbed my arm and pushed me against the bookshelf. He pinned my arms and put his leg between mines so I couldn't move.

"You're not leaving until you tell me who Cam is."

I tried to move my wrist but his grip tightened each time.

"Why do you care?" I yelled.

"Just answer the question." He said ignoring me.

I glared at him as he looking at me with just as much anger.

"I hate you," I spat.

"Feelings mutual. Now answer the question."

His grip on my wrist was so tight, I was losing feeling in my hands now. I winced at the pain but it made no difference to him.

"You're hurting me."

His grip tightened some more. "Answer the question, who is Cam?"

"I'm not going to tell you so just fucking let me go!!!" I yelled.

His eyes turned darker and the grip on my wrist was completely unbearable now.

I was crying and tried to move but it was no use, he wasn't budging.

"Joshua!" Elliot shouted as he ran over.

He tried to pull him away from me but Joshua still wouldn't move. Lucas ran over as well and together both pulled him away from me.

I fell to the floor crying. I looked at my wrist to see there was blood and that they had started to bruise. Elena's bloody body passed before me eyes, her slit wrists etched in my memory. I inhaled sharply at the comparison.

I looked up to see that Joshua was still being held back my Elliot and Lucas but he had finally snapped out of whatever had gotten into him. He looked completely guilty when he looked at my wrist.

"Amira..." he tried to reach out to me but I quickly stood up and backed away.

"Stay the hell away from me!" I yelled.

I took off running to my room and Elliot yelled my name and ran after me. I ran straight into my room and shut the door just as Elliot caught up to me.

"Amira, please open the door. I'm sorry about Joshua, just please open the door." He banged on the door but I was already on the floor crying.

I knew I shouldn't have gotten to close to them, too close to anyone. People just know how to hurt.

"Amira..." Joshua said from the door.

I sobbed harder when I heard his voice.

I heard a faint don't cry and backed away from the door. I pulled myself up and walked to the balcony door. I locked it to make sure he couldn't come in.

I grabbed a first aid box from the bathroom and bandaged my wrist, something that couldn't be done when Elena slit her own wrists. I cried harder at the thought and had to struggle with the bandages. I changed into some pyjamas when I finished as there was some blood on clothes.

I closed the lights and pulled myself under my covers. It was only 3 in the afternoon but I was already done with the day.

Around 5, I heard knocking come from the balcony door. I didn't need to look to see it was Joshua. I squeezed my eyes shut and turned to my side away from the door. After a few minutes of knocking he realized I wasn't going to open the door and left.

It soon became dark outside and I heard Elliot knock on my door.

"Amira, um... I brought you some dinner."

I tried to ignore him and wanted to do nothing more but get him to leave. But he was the only one I had come to truly trust. I couldn't push away the only thing keeping me sane in this house.

I slowly got out of bed and walked to the door. I switched the lights on as I opened the door. He had put the food tray on the floor and was walking away when he heard me open the door.

I picked up the tray and set it on the desk. I motioned for him to come in and after some hesitation he came in.

I locked the door behind him. He hovered in the middle of the room before I told him to sit on the bed.

He picked up my food tray first then sat down on the bed. I tentatively sat down beside him.

"Thank you for letting me in." He said as he removed the cover from the tray.

"To be honest, I wasn't going to. But you're the only reason I'm tolerating living here."

He smiled slightly and picked up the spoon to feed me. I returned the smile and took a bite.

"You know Joshua didn't mean to hurt you. He feels terrible-"

I held up my hand to stop him. "Please, if you are going to stay then don't talk about him. I don't care what he meant or how he feels, I'm just not interested."

He nervously nodded his head and picked up the spoon again. After a few bites, I pushed his hand away.

"You barely ate."

When I opened my mouth to protest he beat me to it.

"Don't try saying you aren't hungry. You had only a muffin for breakfast and skipped lunch. So be quiet and finish the food."

Grudgingly, I ate the food. But I had to admit, it tasted amazing.

"Good girl." He patted my head and I let out a chuckle.

"I'm not a dog E."

His smiled widened and pulled me in for a hug.

"That's how my A should be. Smiling and happy."

He got up to leave after but I pulled him back down.

"Want to watch cartoons? I'm tired of laying in bed. But if you want to leave it's fine."

He moved the food tray to the desk and came back and laid down in my bed. I smiled and grabbed the remote before laying down beside him.

We debated whether we should watch Scooby Doo or Spongebob. In the end we decided to watch both, alternating between the shows.

It was around 1 a.m. when Elliot had fallen asleep. He was snoring lightly and I turned off the TV. Slowly, so I didn't hurt my wrist, I pulled the covers on him.

I walked out onto the balcony to get some fresh air. The cold air blew my hair into my face and I brushed it behind my ear.

I looked out at the snow covered mountains and thought of the time Joshua and I had fallen down and spent the night there.

I shook my head and scolded myself for thinking of him.

The door to his balcony opened and he walked out. He froze in his steps when he saw me standing outside.

He opened his mouth to say my name but I walked back into my room. I heard him jump over and knock on my door. I ignored him and started the fireplace.

The knocking woke Elliot up who rubbed his eyes before looking around the room.

Joshua stopped knocking when he saw Elliot. Elliot stared back at him before shifting his eyes to me. I turned back to the fireplace to stroke the fire and make it bigger.

Elliot got out of bed and walked to Joshua at the door. I heard him open the door and close it behind him.

I heard their muffled voices before Elliot came back in and slammed the door shut. I raised a questioning eyebrow at him but he just muttered incoherent words under his mouth.

I stood up and walked over to him. "You should get some sleep."

He started to protest but I told him I was going to bed now too. He said okay and went off to his room but not before making me promise to come to him if I needed anything. I nodded and pushed him out of my room.

I locked the door behind him and sat down at my desk. I opened my laptop and logged back into my company server.

I reread the message Cameron had sent over and over again. I really wished he was here with me, I needed him now more than ever.

Sighing to myself, I worked on the files until it was morning. I decided to go on a run to get rid of my tiredness.

I could have used a good nights sleep but if that meant letting Joshua near me again then I'd rather never sleep again.

I changed into warm jogging clothes and headed out. The sun was just beginning to rise and no one was out on the streets, save for the few early morning joggers.

I ran double the amount I usually run and my sides were killing me. I doubled over on the bench and spent over 20 minutes just catching my breath.

The sweat was beginning to sweep through my bandages and they were irritating the cuts.

I would have to rethink my dress for tonight as I couldn't go with two bandaged wrists. Or maybe I could just cover it with jewellery.

I thought of that the entire walk home. I took the elevator up to the penthouse and walked in.

As I passed the kitchen, I saw everyone was already awake. Joshua was sitting at the table with a large cup of coffee in front of him. He looked terrible and was holding his head in his hands.

I walked into my room and took a quick shower. As I got changed, Elliot knocked and left breakfast for me outside.

I ate the bowl of cereal he had left for me as I re-bandaged my wrists. The bruises were darker than yesterday and the cuts had dried over. Makeup wouldn't be able to cover this and neither would jewellery.

I walked into my closet and looked for a new dress. I had to choose one that didn't hurt my wrists when I put it on but made sure they were covered as well.

After a while of searching, I found a tan coloured dress with a sequenced bodice. It was a long sleeved v neck with a thigh slit. The sleeves were sequenced as well but the design at the wrist would cover the bandages.

Once my dress was picked out, I found some nude high hells and accessories to match the dress. This would save me time when I had to get ready for the party.

I then spent the rest of the day playing Mario cart with Elliot in his room. He was really good at the game and could have easily beat me every round but saw me struggling with the pain in my wrists and let me win some.

Although that stopped when I yelled at him to quit it and play normally. After that, he didn't let me win once race.

"You suck," I said as I tossed the controller on the