•26• Stupid Games, Stupid Prizes

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L e l a n i

Hands clutch around the small of my waist, steering me from behind through the warmed sand of a disclosed location I've become all too familiar with. I giggle as his fingers playfully tickle my sides, and despite the months I've had to get used to the excitement that comes when he's around, my stomach still swirls with butterflies nearly every moment I'm with him. My hands part the palm leaves and tree branches lining our found path in the woods at the far corner of the beach. We walk the newly-trodden path until we reach a clearing in the trees, and my eyes skim across the foliage and greenery hanging above us, thankful for the secluded shelter and privacy it grants us.

His hands twirl me around, pulling me against his tanned, bare chest and I fall against his heated skin, loving the feeling of it brushing against mine.

"We could just stay here forever, Jay," I smile up at him, loving the sight of his eyes peering down on me. "Just make a home in the trees and no one would ever find us. We could live like this forever, and we wouldn't have to hide anything from anyone because there'd be no one for us to hide it from."

He chuckles at the absurd notion, placing a quick kiss against my lips before replying, "You're crazy, kid."

"Don't call me that," I say seriously, still managing to keep the tone in my voice playful. "I'm not a kid."

"You kind of are," he laughs, brushing my hair behind my ear, "but you're my favorite kid."

He allows his blue eyes to skim across my features, and I feel giddy, loving his effortless way of making me feel like the most important girl in the whole entire world with just a single look. Jason carries his own magnetism, not even having to speak a single word to cause me to draw my mouth up to his. Our lips brush against one another in a fiery kiss, and his fingers tousle in the shoulder-length curls on the back of my head, pulling me into him deeper. With his other hand, he allows his touch to smooth down my back and his fingertips bring goosebumps against my skin. Our bodies lower, our knees falling to the earth as our kiss grows more and more intimate.

Breathlessly, he pulls his lips away from mine, admiring my bikini-covered body as he hushes out, "You know how beautiful you are? The most gorgeous thing I've ever laid my eyes on."

The compliment has me blushing, and I bite against my lip to stifle the love-sick grin threatening to rise to my face. "How long do we have to keep this a secret, Jay? Can't you just talk to my Dad? I think he'd be willing to hear you out and listen."

As soon as the proposition leaves my mouth, he jerks his hands off of me, biting out defensively, "See, Lelani. This is what I'm talking about. You're just a kid."

"I said to quit calling me that," I spit back.

"I'll quit calling you that when you quit acting like one. You're a junior in high school. 17 years old. I'm 20. Do you not understand how much trouble I could get into just for insinuating having a romantic relationship with you?"

"So what, then? I'm just some dirty little secret that you get to keep having fun with and not tell a soul about? It's not fair to me, Jason!"

"Life isn't fair, Lelani! Get that through your head."

I drawback as the harsh words hit my ears, gulping back the lump I can feel beginning to rise in my throat. He can clearly sense my dejection, and his guilty gaze meets mine as he rushes out an apology, "I'm sorry, Lelani." I pull away from him, still recovering from the sting he just placed on my heart. "Look at me," he requests, and I willingly do as he asks, waiting in silence for him to continue. "I really like you. I like you so much that I can't risk your Dad finding out about us, okay? Do you understand what I'm saying?"

I nod, even though I don't fully comprehend the situation we're in. His hand cups my jaw as he keeps a solemn stare on me. "This feels wrong," I mutter out, "I feel so confused."

"When you get older, you'll understand better," he assures me. "Don't let this ruin all of the good times we've had together. We can keep having fun, Lelani. Just give it time."

My mind spins as I try to grapple and sympathize with his standpoint on the matters of our relationship, but suddenly what's felt so natural and easy these past few months is making me feel uneasy. Trying to console me, his palms smooth against my hips but instead of falling into his touch like I usually find myself doing, I withdraw from it.

"Hey, come on," he urges, tilting up my jaw. "What's the matter?"

"I- I don't think I want to do this anymore," I contemplate out loud.

"What do you mean? You're overreacting, Lela. Be more mature about this."

I rear my head back at his subtle dig, rising to my feet as I fire back, "Screw you, Jason."

His hand grips against my wrist, halting me from stomping away as he informs me, "You leave, and I'm not chasing after you."

"I never asked you to."

"What is your deal, huh?"

"My deal is that you keep hiding me like you're ashamed of me. I'm in love with you, Jason."

The three words make him wince, and he scoffs back, "You don't know what love is, Lela."

And now my throat is starting to burn because the way he's looking down on me makes me realize that I've been a naive and stupid girl this whole time. I've convinced myself that I should feel honored to be so seen and desired by a man older than me and that he was telling me the truth when he said he actually cared for me because he's more mature than I am, but I was wrong. I'm just another pawn piece in the board game of society's male gaze.

"Fine," I abruptly respond, not wanting him to see the tears threatening to spill from my eyes. "Whatever the hell this is going on between the two of us is over."

"You're going to regret ending what we have, Lela. I promise you that."

The statement makes me nervous because now I'm afraid of the things I've given him that he can use against me. "Delete them," I demand, yanking away from his firm but gentle hold. "Delete them, now."

"What are you even talking about?" He asks, with an annoyed tone lingering behind his voice.

"The pictures! Delete them, right now!"

He goes still for a moment, keeping quiet as he reflects on my commands. Slowly, I watch a cocky, devilish smirk come to his lips and he scorns, "Don't flatter yourself. I never saved them."

Feeling my stomach twist at the mere sight of a face I thought I once knew, I force myself to turn away as I stomp my way back to the beach. "I'm so stupid," I start to whimper underneath my breath.

My lungs feel as though they're on fire as I run back out onto the hot sand, my eyes blurring with the tears that are starting to fall down my cheeks.

"Kid, wait," Jason's voice shouts after me from behind, but the sound only triggers me to start running because I know with just a single look he holds enough power to convince me to stay.

"Lelani," the voice hollers, but this time it sounds more distorted.

A palm meets against my shoulder, shaking me from my daydreaming and bringing me back to the reality that's actually surrounding me; my home. "You okay, kid?"

Coming to my senses, I dart my eyes over, my vision flooding with the image of my Dad's glass award case, displaying all the certificates, awards, and medals he's been presented with throughout his years serving in the United States Marine Corps. All the things I almost practically stole from him, due to my immature and careless mistake.

I glance over beside me, to the person trying to grab my attention. "Uncle Robbie," I smile, allowing myself to finally notice his comforting and familiar presence.

"You daydreaming again, kid?" He chuckles.

"Sorry," I laugh, trying to get rid of the awful memories still swarming in the back of my head. "I don't know what's up with me lately."

"As long as you don't plan on running out on me again," he teases, alluding to the weekend cookout I fled from a couple of weeks back. "You were supposed to help me sear the kebabs like you always do. Don't tell your Dad I told you, but he doesn't do it like you."

"Oh, I'm telling him alright," I joke, jabbing a finger against his side. I nod towards the filled trophy case sitting in front of us both, "He gets all those awards, I think I at least deserve a prize for something."

Our chuckles fade out, and in the silence, I can't help but feel compelled to apologize. "Uncle Robbie, I'm sorry for running out on our cookout the other week. It's just- I hate it when Dad brings up- you know what- you know? I feel like I can't ever escape it. I feel like it's going to be branded on me for the rest of my life, and he won't ever be able to look past it. I feel like because of it, he and Momma won't ever take me seriously."

"Oh, Lelani," he hushes back, looking over to me with sympathy swimming in his green eyes. "You're too hard on yourself about that. You were just a kid. Mistakes happen, alright? Trust me, I can testify to that. Your Dad is just looking out for you. He was broken when he found out about everything."

"Yeah," I sigh, "because I almost cost him his career."

"No, he was broken because he hated seeing you hurt the way that you did. What happened wasn't your fault, you have to understand that." I let his words soak in and as badly as I want to believe them, I don't think I ever will. I'll always feel responsible for the consequences that came from my and Jason's relationship. I can tell Robbie senses my doubt because he continues, "You know, your Dad has worked hard to get where he is in the Marines. He's always stood out from the rest of us; always carried the lead and achieved everything he ever set his mind to. He carries a pride about his job that the rest of us wish we could have, but you know what, kid?"

I cut my gaze up to Robbie, his blonde, high and tight haircut, and emerald eyes staring me back. "What?" I finally have the bravery to ask.

"He would sacrifice it all for you. He really does love you so much, Lelani. He doesn't try to hold what happened against you; he is just trying to keep you safe."

I feel the muscles in my shoulders soften because everything he's saying to me is everything I didn't even know that I needed to hear. All this time, I've felt like a disappointment to my parents after what happened and Robbie is finally helping me see it all differently.

"But it feels like because I screwed up with Jason, they don't trust me to make any decisions for myself," I say sadly. "I don't want to go to college, Uncle Robbie. I want to surf. It's all I've ever wanted, and they don't believe in me."

He shakes his head, "That's not true, kid. You're talented, they know that. You just have to give your parents time."

"Competition is in January," I argue, feeling helpless. "I don't have much time."

"Look, Lelani. Bottom line is, in life, you have to chase what you want. There will be people in this world who will constantly try to step in your way and make you feel unsure about your plans, but that doesn't mean that you just stop chasing your dreams. It means that you work even harder to attain them so that you can look back and show them the potential they underestimated in you all along." He throws an encouraging grin my way, making me suddenly feel hopeful again. "Don't you worry about your Dad, kid. I'll talk to him, okay? You just worry about kicking ass at competition in a few months, alright?"

He slings his arm around my shoulder, squeezing me into a playful hug. "Thanks, old man. You're the best."

"And don't you forget it," he chimes back, starting his way through the house towards the backyard. He slips through the backdoor, peeping his head through the sliding panel one last time. "If I do this for you, you've gotta promise me one thing, alright?"

I smirk at his proposal, crossing my arms across my chest as I play back, "And what would that be?"

"No sneaking around behind our backs."

My heart drops inside my chest because deep down I already know that I've broken that promise. The back door slams shut before he's able to gauge my reaction or before I have a chance to respond, and I'm left to sort through Uncle Robbie's deal on my own. My pulse intensifies in my neck as I come to another realization.

 Brodie and I have more eyes on us than I thought. 

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A/N: Lelani and Brodie's secrets are getting juicer and juicier 🤭😂

What did y'all think about Lelani's backstory??? WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK HAPPENED??

I hope y'all enjoyed this week's chapter! I got some lovey-dovey and hot and spicy chapters coming up so prepare yourselves!! 😉

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