Chapter 49: Too

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Becca

The door to the locker room opened and out came Brett. His eyes immediately found mine and his face broke out into a smile. He looked radiant, like he had swallowed the sun and its light was spilling out of his every pore.

My heart was beating so quickly I was expecting someone in the crowd to turn to me and say tell your heart to quiet down, would you? My palms were sweating, the world felt like it was shrinking around me as Brett made his way closer, his eyes locked on mine the entire time.

The crowd parted for him as he walked through it. People were slapping him on the back, holding their hands up for high fives, yelling congratulations and other words of admiration, but Brett didn't acknowledge any of them. His eyes and his smile were directed only at me, as if everything else faded away and we were the only ones here in this moment.

I blinked and he was standing in front of me, too perfect to be real. I could see the droplets of water sliding off his hair and down his cheek. I could smell his soap and his freshly washed skin.

"You came," was all he said, his eyes searching mine desperately, as if he were expecting me to disappear any second.

"Brett, I-" My apology was cut short because before I knew it, Brett was kissing me. And not just a soft, slow kiss, but the type of kiss that we most definitely should not be sharing in front of all these spectators. I stood there frozen, and then my instincts kicked in and I couldn't help myself.

I kissed him back, knotting my fingers desperately in his hair and pulling his face even closer to mine. Brett's hand slid down to the small of my back and he leaned forward into me, my body leaning backwards until I was dipped over and his hands were the only thing holding me up.

I couldn't breath, my lungs needed air but my heart needed Brett. I held his face in my hands, marvelling at how real and how mine he was. His tongue brushed against my lips, enticing me to open my mouth for him. I stilled, hesitant to kiss him like that right here.

Oh, what the hell. People were watching, might as well give them something to talk about.

I parted my lips and Brett's tongue was everywhere, mingling with mine in a slow dance. People were whistling, cheering, screaming words I couldn't make out. But all that noise was secondary, the only thing that mattered right now was the boy I was in love with. 

"Get it, Wells!" Someone in the crowd yelled, interrupting our moment. I smiled against Brett's mouth, pulling my face apart from his as I laughed harder than I had in a while. He was watching me so intently, his blazing with a love so fierce. After a second, Brett chucked too, rolling his eyes at me as he held his middle finger up to the person in the crowd, then leaning in and kissing me again slowly as the spectators erupted.

My heart had left my chest at this point, if I looked up into the sky I could probably see it flying past the moon and into another galaxy.

I stared at Brett. He stared at me. We didn't say a word, we simply stared at each other with these gigantic, goofy smiles on our faces and it was like the last piece of our puzzle clicked into place. Just like that, we were back.

Brett grabbed my hand and leaned forward, speaking into my ear loudly so I could hear him over the crowd. "Can we please go somewhere to talk?"

In that moment, I would have gone anywhere with him. To the ends of the earth and back again. Wherever he wanted to go, I was there in a heartbeat.

"Yes!" I shouted over the crowd, making Brett laugh, the booming kind of laugh that makes the world seem a little more alive.

He wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me down the slope of the grass towards the parking lot. I could tell he was impatient to get away from the crowd, he was walking so quickly I was running to catch up.

When we were walking through the parking lot and the crowd's noise was a distant hum, I turned my head to glance at Brett and he was already watching me, smiling that smile that made my heart flip in my chest.

I giggled. He laughed. His hand held mine a little tighter. Good, I thought, don't ever let go.

"I heard you told off Jenny today," Brett said, sounding impressed.

I shrugged like it was no big deal. "Someone had to."

Brett stopped walking suddenly and I jerked to a halt beside him. He quickly wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me against his body, his other hand cupping my cheek.

"You're incredible, Becca." He breathed, his eyes scanning my face. Smiling, I stood on my tiptoes and gently placed my lips on his, kissing him softly to make up for lost time.

I was going to ask him to tell me everything, allow him to explain why he had been so distant these past weeks. But right now, I didn't want to ruin this moment where everything felt right in the world.

Seconds later we arrived at his car and I nearly hugged the darn thing, I was so excited to just be back in the same world where I rode in Brett's car. Brett, being the gentleman he was, held the door open so I could enter. The smell of the leather took me back to so many months ago when I sat in this car for the first time, driving to school with Brett - my pretend boyfriend. Now, here I was, same car, same me, same Brett. The only thing that changed was pretend turned into real. Very, very real.

I would have never guessed I'd see the day where my reality was better than any fictional book I could ever read.

The driver's door opened and Brett sat beside me, and the car felt a little more right with his body in it. I could feel his warmth, feel the electricity vibrating off of him.

He turned towards me. "There's something I want to show you," was all he said, his voice serious.

"Then show me," I replied. He smiled a lazy grin that made my heart race and our eyes locked for a minute, neither of us wanting to turn away.

Brett put the key in the ignition and the car roared to life. He reversed out of the parking lot and we were driving down the road, the windows open and wind blowing.

With one hand on the steering wheel and the other on my knee, we drove into the night to an undisclosed destination - but the where didn't matter, it was the who that mattered. And right now, the who I had beside me made me feel like the luckiest girl in the world.

* * *

Brett pulled into a cul-de-sac lined entirely with small, run-down homes. The street was quiet, the darkness temporality lit by the lamp posts scattered throughout the neighbourhood.

I wondered what we were doing here, glancing at Brett for an answer to an unasked question but he remained silent, his eyes searching the houses in front of us like he was looking for something. An emotion decorated his face, one I couldn't quite decipher.

The engine was cut and I was overwhelmed by the heavy silence. The street seemed to be dead, with no sign of life whatsoever. These were houses - not homes.

A sudden chill ran down my spine as a feeling of unease settled in my stomach.

Brett's hand found mine and I let out a breath.

"Can you tell me what we are doing here now?" I asked, arching my eyebrow questioningly.

Brett's head tilted slightly to the side, his eyes meeting mine but his attention was elsewhere.

"Not yet." His eyes returned back to the street. I noticed that they were no longer searching. Now, his eyes remained on one specific house.

The house was directly in front of us, with a one-car-garage and a driveway leading up to it with holes in the asphalt. The garbage bin at the end of the driveway was knocked over, cans rolling aimlessly around in the wind. Shingles were hanging off the roof, a few lay broken on the driveway. The glass in the windows was shattered, with large cracks running through it, surrounded by rusted bricks.

The house looked dark. Broken. I wondered who lived there and what their life was like. And I suddenly felt sad that I would never know.

The sound of Brett's door opening caught my attention. I watched him walk in front of the car to my side, his hands shoved in his pockets and his gaze still locked on that house. His hair was blowing lightly in the wind. He looked out of place, too perfect for a rugged street like this.

Brett opened my door and outstretched his hand, an invite that I willingly accepted. He smiled at me as I exited the car, but he remained distracted.

As badly as I wanted to pry and ask about the house he kept glancing at, I willed my mouth shut - knowing that Brett would tell me all about it once he was ready to.

We walked hand in hand through the street, neither of us saying a word. I was grateful for Brett being by my side, thankful I wasn't wandering these eerie streets alone.

The wind blew and I shuddered again, feeling cold even with Brett's warm hand in mine.

Suddenly Brett turned down a pathway in between two houses, pulling me alongside him as we walked to whichever destination he had in mind.

The pathway had no lampposts, it was completely dark aside from the few rays of light pouring in from the street and the moon. Brett pulled me closer to him and I wrapped my arm around his waist, a million questions running through my mind.

As we walked, the pathway opened up into a small park surrounded by open fields on all sides. The park had a single slide, a swing that creaked in the wind and a wooden bench. The entire display was sad.

Brett lead me onto the field and sat down on the grass, pulling me down in his lap so that my back was to his chest and his legs engaged me. The houses we just walked past backed onto the field, their backyards completely visible from where we were sitting.

Brett propped his foot on the grass, bending his knee up. I shifted, leaning my side against his knee so that I could face him.

His eyes were still locked on that house.

I watched him, waiting for him to say something, anything.

"See that house, Becca?" Brett raised his arm, his finger pointing to the house occupying his attention.

I followed his gaze and nodded, watching him as he watched the house.

"I used to live there."

My eyes widened at his words, expecting him to have said anything but that. Before I could open my mouth to speak, Brett continued.

"When I was five-years-old my dad bought me a football for my birthday. I remember being so happy, pulling it out of the gift bag with a huge smile on my face," Brett smiled at the memory, his voice full of nostalgia and sadness that reflected the look in his eyes.

I squeezed his hand in mine, gesturing for him to continue the story. He glanced at me, reaching up slowly to tuck a loose strand of hair behind my ear before he continued.

"We spent my entire birthday in this exact field, throwing the football around until the sun set and my mom was calling for us to come back inside for dinner." Brett's eyes met mine and he smiled sadly, a sadness that always decorated his face when he spoke about his father. "I never wanted that day to end, Becca. That was my favourite birthday. You know why?"

"Why?" I asked.

"Because I spent it with my dad. He was always working, rarely home during the day. But that day, I got to spend my entire birthday out here with him. That's all I wanted."

"That's why you love football," I stated, nestling closer into Brett's chest and tilting my head upwards to stare at him.

I could feel him nod, his chin bumping against the top of my head.

"I loved football because I loved my father," Brett said simply, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"And now?"

He paused. "Now I don't love either."

The first thing I realized was that I never knew that Brett disliked the sport that seemed to define him at Eastwood High. I furrowed my eyebrow in confusion, asking the question on my mind.

"Why do you still play?"

Brett paused for a moment, twirling a strand of my hair around his finger absentmindedly as he thought.

"I joined the team freshman year for my dad. I wanted him to come to all my games, Becca. I just wanted him to be proud of me." His voice broke, heavy with emotion. "Junior year, when my parent's marriage fell apart, I wanted to quit the team but I couldn't do that to the guys. I couldn't just abandon them."

"So you continued to play even though you hated it. Even though each game was a reminder of your dad," I finished, knowing I was right.

Brett wrapped his arms around me, pulling me tightly to his chest as if I could take the pain away.

"What about the house?" I asked curiously, nodding towards Brett's old home across the field.

"We moved out when I was ten. My dad got a promotion at work and he could finally afford to give us a better life." Brett stopped speaking and I glanced up at him, noticing a smile on his lips. "My dad always used to say that his family deserved better than that house. That -" his voice deepened, mimicking what I believed to be the tone of his father "- the Wells are destined for greatness!"

Brett laughed, shaking his head back and forth. His jaw tensed as the smile faded from his face, even quicker than it had come, and I could see the anger behind his eyes.

"I think he let the money get to him, Becs. I think..." Brett took a deep breath, his breath shaky as he exhaled. "I think he began to believe that he was destined for greatness, not my mother and I. That we were just holding him back from living the life he always dreamed of."

My heart squeezed in my chest and I tilted my head, pressing my cheek into Brett's chest and wrapping my arms around his torso. He kissed my forehead gently before resting his head on mine.

"Your father may not have seen your greatness, Brett, but I do." I told him honestly, staring into his eyes and desperately wanting to take away the sadness in them. "You're full of so much life, so much love. If your father couldn't see that, it's his loss. I don't know how he could possibly think his life could be better without you in it. A life without you isn't a life I would want."

Neither of us said anything for a moment. We sat there, staring at each other and feeling like the only two people alive in the entire universe. The love in Brett's eyes made me feel at home. His eyes were the ones I wanted to look into for the rest of my life.

"Sounds like you're in love with me, Hartwell." Brett teased, grinning widely.

I bit my lip to hide the smile creeping its way onto my face. I had never felt so content before. Any second, the happiness would come bursting out of me - I could feel it.

Brett ran his finger across my lip. "Don't do that, love. You know what it does to me," he whispered, his eyes trained on my mouth.

I wanted to kiss him so badly. I had been deprived of his love for too long and I felt like I would die if I didn't have him right now. Before I could inch my face closer to his, Brett grabbed my face in his hands, his eyes softening as they returned to mine.

"I know we've both had bad experiences with parents, Becca. We were shown that love is dangerous, that it's destructive. But..." He trailed off, rubbing his thumb across my cheek and making the butterflies flap their wings in my stomach.

"But what?" I asked, my voice breathless.

"But I think our love can be beautiful," Brett finished, watching me nervously. 

"I know it can be, Brett, because it already is."

Brett grabbed my face in his hands gently, his eyes saying a thousand things at once while he smiled at me. I wanted him to say it, to say those three words one last time so I could finally say them back.

"Tell me you love me," I whispered, pressing my face into the palm of his hand.

Brett chuckled, raising an eyebrow at me.

"I love you, my Becca. I love you too much."

I watched him for a moment, letting his words wash over me and sink into the cracks of my heart. And then, I told him what I should have told him weeks ago.

"I love you too," I said, grinning ear to ear as the words left my mouth.

Then, Brett smiled and I swear he pulled the stars from the sky because I had never seen anything so bright before.

My heart expanded in my chest, as if it grew a little bigger to make room for the magnitude of love I have for this beautiful boy in front of me. Brett was watching me as if I was the sun his world revolved around and I couldn't quite fathom how I ended up here - how on a planet with billions of people I managed to capture the heart of the most beautiful one.

I tiled my chin up as Brett leaned down, our lips yearning for each other's. His mouth met mine and my world exploded into a million tiny fragments. He tasted like peppermint and every good thing mixed into one.

His lips were soft, gentle as they moved with mine. His mouth felt like home and I had been homesick for too long. I pressed his face closer to mine, scared that if I let go for just one second he would disappear like a beautiful dream gone too soon.

Brett's hands left my face, running down to my waist before they slide beneath my thighs, lifting me up gently as he straightened his legs, positioning me on his lap in one swift movement as his mouth never left mine. I wrapped my legs around his waist, knotting my hands into his hair as I desperately pulled him closer to me, wanting so much more. Brett's fingers grazed the bare skin on my back and his touch burned in the best way possible.

"I want you, Becca." He whispered into my ear, his breath sending a chill throughout my entire body.

For the first time, I wanted Brett in all the ways he wanted me.

"I want you too," I told him shyly, voicing the exact thoughts running around in my mind.

Brett's body went rigid for a moment, frozen. He pulled away from me, his eyes wild as they met mine.

"You do?" He asked. I didn't miss the shock in his voice as he ran a finger down my arm, goosebumps decorated the skin his finger just touched.

"I do," I confirmed, smiling awkwardly at him and suddenly feeling very aware of his body pressed into mine.

I gazed up at him shyly, my heart beating so quickly in my chest that I was sure he could hear it.

Brett stood up suddenly, pulling me up with him. I brushed the grass off my legs and averted my gaze as Brett readjusted his pants.

A moment later he took my hand in his, leading me back up the pathway to his car. Brett was walking quickly and I struggled to catch him, eventually breaking out into a jog just to keep up with his long steps.

Suddenly Brett stopped and turned to me, sweeping me up into his arms impatiently before I could protest. I laughed, completely giddy, smiling up at him as my body shook with each step he took.

"Where we you taking me?" I asked, my mind wandering with all the possibilities.

"My house." Brett replied quickly. His eyes met mine and they blazed with a deep fire I had never seen before.

But this time, I didn't want to let the flame die. I wanted to douse it in gasoline and see how bright it could burn.

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