It's not officially night time yet, so I might as well go do my daily business. Tonight will just be a night about me. A few hours of peace all to Ashlyn Neil. 

So be prepared. 

This is going to get boring. 

I walk out, wearing the same clothing I had on. Still comfy and simple. 

I strut out my bedroom with my car keys and my wallet and leave my apartment. I head into the elevator and wait to get down to the ground level. As I exit the elevator and walk across the parking lot of the garage, I get a text from Ellie. 

E: OMG. I forgot the milk is expired n i forgot 2 tell u.

E: Pick some up pls? i wan sum 4 my cereal tmrrw hehe ly

I roll my eyes, classic Ellie. 

Always putting fun before chores. 

Wait, what did I just say?

Goddammit I'm becoming a mom. 

Or like a responsible adult. 

Adult. That's the first time I thought of myself like that. 

How grown up of me. 

I decide to keep walking to my car and text back. 

A: Ye, i gotchu i guess i'll run and do errands 2day lmao 

HONK!

"AHHH HOLY SHIT!" I screech, almost falling at the bright light beaming on me. 

I literally almost just died. 

This car almost just ran me over!

I yell at the car and stand with my hands angrily pointing at it, "HEY, WATCH IT!"

The car honks again. 

What. A. Douche. 

"I'M WALKING HERE!" I shout, stomping up closer to the hood of the dude's car. 

The door of the car, I hear, unclicks. 

I'm about to give this son of a bitch a piece of my mind. 

Then out walks the most cutest, probably one of the most attractive people I've ever seen.

He was adorably hot. 

"Hey lady, I'm trying to drive!" The gorgeous stranger yells at me.

Snapping back into reality, "W-wha, yeah okay well are you so blind you can't see a pedestrian that is obviously right in front of you?"

"Look, I wasn't paying to much attention, I'm just... running late," He shrugs shyly.

"Yeah well, be careful because you almost cost me my life!" I exclaim.

"I know, I'm sorry," He mumbles sincerely.

This boy looked around my age, maybe a little older, and I honestly wouldn't mind spending my night with him... just kidding, he may be hot but he's a blind asshole.

"Doesn't sound like your sorry," I retort. 

"Look, I'm trying not to be a dick. I'm in a rush to go on a-"

"A date?" I ask, suggestively.

"How'd you-"

I pull in with the sympathy, "A girl knows, and you're nervous, anxious, and testosterone filled. Have fun on your date," I half smile and walk to my car. I don't know why or how I turned so friendly so quickly but this guy looked like he needed a little support.

"T-thanks, didn't expect you to be-"

"Understanding? Even though you almost just killed me?"

"Pfft, I wouldn't say I almost just killed you.."

I interrupt with, "Point is, I'm not trying to be a dick either, go on your date dude. Good luck," I say, reaching my car. 

"Right, right,.... wish me luck!" He mumbles nervously getting back into his car.

"I already said good luck man," I laugh. 

"Yeah aha, I knew that..."

"Oh and be yourself stop being an idiot, chicks love that!" I shout, getting into my BMW and closing the door. 

He gets back into his Jeep and drives out the parking garage. 

What a dork. 

/////

I wait in line at Dunkin Donuts for my sandwich. 

If you couldn't already tell, I'm obsessed, and if you haven't had one on a croissant... agh it's delicious.  

And lo-key fattening so I should probably hit the gym soon. 

The woman calls my name and I grab my bag and head out to the nearest Starbucks. I arrive and order a hot chocolate like Sam had the other day.

I think hot chocolate now reminds me of Sam because he's so sweet. Honestly, I want to be his girlfriend, but... I can't and don't know how we could make it as a couple when I don't think I like him that way. Trust me, I want to like him, I want to learn to love him, but you can't learn to love someone and that's the truth. 

Learning to love someone is so forceful, it's like forcing Colby and I to be friends. He can't learn to love me. I can't learn to love him. In fact, we can't even learn to like each other. It's not doable nor morally right to do. I love the thought of Colby, but the reality is, he's the one person I can't stand. One can't learn to love unless they have real love to give; and if there's no love to give, why even bother to try? 

Loving someone, now that takes the flutter in your stomach to let you know that you're fond of them; that they're the one. If I were to love someone, I want to devote all my time to them, be there when they need me, be the anchor to their ship; and wouldn't you want someone to treat you the same way? When you love someone, they need to love you back. 

If they don't love you back,

what is the point in loving them in the first place?

What is the point in liking Colby in the first place?

/////

After finishing my sandwich and drinking my hot chocolate, I drive out to the supermarket. 

Time to go buy milk for Ellie. 

As I walk into the dairy section and grab a carton, I find a card on the ground, ripped into two pieces.

Words were inscribed in a sloppy manner. 

It read, 

Dear Kai Brooks,

I took the opportunity. I'm moving to Africa, but I'll always love you. I'm sorry, I hope you can understand Kai. You know how much this means to me to take that award because of my clinical trial research. Those children need me, and being a doctor is my job. Kai, you'll go far and I know we've only been together for a short amount of time but we had something special and I don't even deserve your love even though I love you. You're too good to be mine and I don't want to hold you back. But leaving this note is because if I told you in person, you'd be holding me back. 

This is my dream. 

Again, I'm sorry how this has to be goodbye. 

 Best Wishes, Dannie Jennings

I finish reading... Dannie Jennings. You're a heart breaker! I hate to see the guy whose heart was cut into two. I take the letter with me and arrive at the checkout line. As I'm self checking out, I couldn't help but notice some dude buying two packs of Corona Beers. The stranger's back was facing mine but then he turned around. 

And it was the adorably hot stranger who almost killed me with his Jeep. 

I smirk, "Hey stranger, fancy seeing you not running me over with your car."

I then realized he looked terrible, his buttons on his shirt were undone and his hair was a mess. How'd he get so hideous in such a short time is beyond the understanding I can comprehend.

"Woah, did someone run you over with their car?" I ask. "Thought you had a date to get to?" 

"I did, and the girl stood me up before even getting there," He sighs, running a hand through his distraught strands. "In fact, she's standing me up for life."

I nod, "Tough... but how would she be standing you up for life?" 

"She got a job," He bitterly puts, "In a different continent. And, in fact again, she's in Africa."

Then I got the memo. I glance slowly down at the letter tucked beneath my elbow. Fuck. He's the guy who got his heart ripped into two pieces. 

"Kai..." 

"That's my name...How'd you-"

"Uh, is this your letter?" I cautiously ask, holding up the torn in two pieces of paper. 

He looks away and puts his hands on his hips. 

Kai looks back at me, "Yep... did you rea-"

I wince, "Yeah..."

He pinches the bridge of his nose, "Do you want to get a coffee with me?" 

/////

So Kai and I went to Barnes and Noble which has a little cafe for us to sit at. We got to know each other a little bit more and he's telling me the whole little back story. 

"Tell me everything."

"I can't believe I'm revealing something completely personal to a girl I almost ran over," Kai sighs. 

I smile, "You can trust me dude."

"Yeah, I think we established that Ashlyn. You just spent the last ten minutes telling me all about your great accomplishments. Of course I'll trust a goody goody." 

I gasp, "I'm not all good, I can be rebellious, you ass!" 

"Ahuh. Like?"

"My friend Sam and I spray painted the Hollywood sign!" I exclaim.

"Okay, that's pretty cool," He shrugs.

"I know, now tell me your love story," I plead, folding my hands beneath my chin and resting my elbows on the table. 

He grins, "Well, I have a few doctor friends because I am a pre-med student. But I met a beautiful resident at the hospital my sister works at and I observe at. I'm not an intern quite yet, but I'm almost done with school."

"Woah, that's amazing. I'm attending UCLA to become a pre-med student! Wait, how old are you?" I ask. 

"22 and a half years old."

I hope my mouth didn't gape open. "I'm almost 19! W-wow."

"Okay I hope this isn't too weird, I feel way too lonely right now to have nobody to talk to," He says. 

"No no, keep going. I can still listen. Get it all out of your system," I reply.

"Okay," He half smiles, "I met Dannie officially at my sister's birthday party and she and I hit it off. We became best friends later on but lost contact after she started this clinical trial. She's trying to find the cure to degeneration of body parts for children. We weren't speaking for months, but then she cracked the case and she thinks she found the solution. She called me up to celebrate after receiving an award. Later, she turned in an application to get some type of famous Grant to continue her study in Africa and with its children and we started "dating' for a good few months. It was a short amount of time but I was falling in love for her. I thought she was falling for me too! I was going to ask her to officially be my girlfriend today, since she was always so conscious and iffy about dating a boy many years younger than her."

"I'm sorry that that was how she had to shut you down through a letter..." I sigh sadly.

"Yeah but I guess when you love someone you have to set them free. Dannie had her devotion and time primarily to her job. She loves it more than anything. More than me."

"At least she didn't break up with ya over text."

"Feels like she broke my heart over text, Ash."

"At least you have a copy of, a remembrance of someone who impacted your life in a loving way."

"You're right. Thank you, really," He smiles, putting a hand over mine across the table. I look up and smile back. 

"Well, it's getting late. I should really go home before my milk expires in the hot night's temperature," I groan, getting up from the table. 

"Right, let me walk you to your car," Kai agrees, standing up. 

We get to my car and he thanks me for being someone to talk to. 

"If you need anybody to talk to ever, you can always call me or come over to my apartment since we live in the same complex," I giggle. 

"Yeah, definitely," He chuckles. 

"Oh you should come to this party my viner friends are throwing! They hit a million followers and we're celebrating at this beach house. I can so text you the details!"

"Sure, when is it?"

"Tomorrow night. Think you can make it?" 

"For you, I'll try," He winks.

I grin, "Have a good night, Kai."

"You too, Ashlyn."

/////

I get into my apartment and put the milk in the fridge. I kick off my shoes and shuffle my bare feet into my room. As I lay in my room, on my laptop, I think about Kai.

He may be older than me but age is just a number. He's perfect for me if you think about it. 

He's kind, devoted, even so boyish that he'll forget all the little things and will only focus on what's important. He got so anxious to ask his girl to be officially be his girlfriend that he almost ran me over. Now, I'm not saying that's a good thing, but you can tell he cares for this girl Dannie. 

And I want someone to care for me like him. 

He's a pre-med student. He wants to be some sort of doctor! Like me! I don't know of, or have any other medical student friends or family members. Kai could help me. I love imagining myself to be the wife of a hot doctor, like in my dreams. We'd have beautiful children and live a beautiful life. 

Could Kai be that guy that will fulfill my fantasies? 

I don't know, I just met the guy because he almost killed me.

Suddenly, I hear a knock at the door.

Are they all  back already? It's only about 8:20 p.m. 

I heave myself off the floor and jog over to open the door.

"Hey El, why are you already-"

I stop mid sentence to look up, at the person who is definitely not Ellie.

Colby?

He stands there, motionless, and peers down at me. I lost my breath at just looking at him while holding the door open. Ever since five days ago, we haven't had a real conversation and the kiss was just too awkward to talk about.

I stare at his captivating blue eyes while he stares back at mine.

He lifts his hands and gently pulls my face into his lips, sending fireworks everywhere in the process. He doesn't move his lips but keeps them still against mine for what felt like a long peck.

It was magical, I adore his touch but in the end, I'll always hate his ignorance.

He quickly draws away and disappears into his apartment, leaving me speechless.

Why does he keep doing this to me!

Kisses me, leaves me.

Kisses me, breaks me.

Kisses me, destroys me.

Now, I am going to destroy him.

He cannot, under any circumstance, keep doing this.

How am I feeling you may ask?

Honestly pissed off! You don't just go do that to girls.

Play with their hearts, and leave them broken. He's my rival, what am I suppose to expect though? He intentionally ruins my life on a daily basis, that's the whole purpose of an enemy right?

Who does he take me for?

Some kissing buddy?

Ashlyn Neil is no fool to fall.

I hate liking my rival!

---------------------------------------------

THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH FOR 3K+ READS HOLLLLLYYYYY. Everyone who comments cute and funny stuff on my chapters are honestly so sweet and are the besttttt<33 Literally thanks for reading, it means the world to me! Stay tuned for incoming chapters... honestly love Colby and Dylan O'brien so much it's not even funny. (But mostly Colby because Dylan is Nush's) 

Dedicating this chapter to @nush07 for being my fucking bestie <3 love youuuu 

COMMENT'you're a wizard, jerry' if you read up to here. 

*VOTE* & SHARE!!! DON'T BE SHY, FEEDBACK IS ALWAYS APRRECIATED!

hugs, kt