"Oh, honey." Mum wrapped her arms around me the second I walked into the car park. Austin had to go back to class, but Levi met me at my locker and gave me back my stuff. He tried to insist on walking with me to the carpark, but I didn't want him to get in trouble for being out of class longer than he should have, so I managed to convince him I was fine to be by myself.

"This is for you." Mum handed me a small box, as we climbed into the car, which had Willow's Muffins written across the top in swirly letters.

"Thankyou." I beamed at her, feeling much better. I opened the box to find a triple choc muffin with swirly chocolate icing on the top.

"I thought you might like that." Mum chuckled. "How are you feeling?"

"Tired." I admitted. "Sorry for interrupting your day." Mum scoffed.

"Ash, honey, the only thing I care about is the wellbeing of my children. I would drop anything to make sure you were okay. Plus, I was having coffee with an old friend and good gosh she was boring me to death. I was relieved when I saw Austin calling; it meant I had an excuse to go!" I couldn't help but laugh. Only five minutes with my mum and I felt a thousand times better.

"You're home early." Ryan looked between mum and me. I just nodded and went to the kitchen to get a plate for my muffin, which I was desperate to taste. It didn't even need to take a second bite to know it was the new best thing I'd ever tasted. "Ooh yum can I have a bite?" Ryan leaned over to take a bite of my precious muffin when I shrieked and moved it away.

"It's mine!"

"Oh, c'mon Ash." He pouted. "I'm your favourite brother, surely you give me just a bit."

"No."

"Please." He begged, drawing out the word as long as he could.

"I've had a very bad day, and this is making me feel better. Don't try to steal my one bit of happiness." I glared.

"Why was it so bad?" Just like that, his attention was no longer on the delicious muffin, but he was concerned about me. I loved him.

"I had a panic attack. That's why I came home."

"Oh. That's no good." He frowned. No kidding, Ryan. "Was there, like...a particular trigger?"

"Yeah." I answered, after a beat.

"Ash, how is the muffin?" Mum asked.

"Amazing." I told her, offering her a bite.

"Ooh, yum, that actually is really good." She giggled.

"I can't believe you." Ryan shook his head at me, glaring but with mischief glimmering in his eyes.

"Are you alright to stay here with him, honey? I want to help dad out at the office."

"And I don't even have a name anymore." My brother continued to grumble.

"I'm fine." I reassured mum, watching her leave. The second the door clicked shut, Ryan pounced. He snatched the entire muffin from my hands, bolting into the living room.

"RYAN!" I screamed after him, clumsily getting off my chair and running. I passed through the doorway in time to see him jump onto the couch and take a big, slobbery bite out of my muffin. "You are a horrible brother." I leapt into his lap, taking the muffin straight back out of his hands and taking my own bite.

"But you love me, so who cares." He smirked.

"You're right." I said, after I'd finished chewing. "And you're not a horrible brother." Suddenly I felt guilty.

"I know you don't mean it when you say those things, Ash. I don't care if you're joking around, it's what all of us do." He pulled me close.

"I had a panic attack today because my biology teacher asked us to make a family tree." I whispered.

"And you couldn't do it?"

"I didn't even try. My mind just went to my bio dad and stopped there. I-I couldn't think of anyone else." I tucked my head into his chest and took a big deep breath.

"How bad was it?" Ryan asked, cautiously. I wanted so desperately to question what he meant by 'it', but realistically I knew. It could only be one thing.

"So bad." I shook my head. "I didn't have a bed, I slept on an old mattress in the basement. The house was so old and disgusting. I'd never had anyone buy me clothes, so everything I wore was just out of the lost property at my school. He was married, too. His wife was worse than him. Both were always drunk, high, or passed out on the couch. And they smoked all these disgusting smelling things. Their friends were scary, and they always came home loud and looking for me."

"They hit you, didn't they?" Ryan's fists were balled up at his sides, his knuckles turning white.

"Every time." I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to make the images disappear. "Can I tell you something?"

"Anything, baby."

"The day when Officer Sarah and the others stormed the house, I thought they were going to kill me. I'd never been caught in a position as bad as that before. But then, when I was at the hospital, I had time to think. He wouldn't have gone that far because I was nearly old enough. I'd heard his friends offer him money before, asking for me. Someone would always say I wasn't old enough yet, that I was close but not yet. They were waiting for me to turn sixteen so their friends would pay him to use me."

"No more, Ash, please." Ryan moved one of his hands to my head.

"Sorry." I whispered.

"No, no, it's not you. I just..." He took a moment to gather himself, and I could feel his heart beating faster. "It makes me so angry you have no idea. It makes me angry at myself, at both him and his wife obviously, at the police, just everyone who could have done better."

"It's not anyone's fault. I know that." I sat up and looked at him.

"I would change everything if I could, you know that? I'm never letting anything happen to you again, Ash."

"I know." I saw something click in his face and his serious expression softened. "What?" I asked.

"I just had an idea." I cocked my head to the side, prompting him to continue. "I graduate in a few weeks. Maybe I should apply to the police academy. I could help people in your position, try and make a difference."

"You'd be a good police officer, Ryan. You should."