Chapter 32

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Mum and dad were still asleep each morning when I left for school, and out working each night when I went to bed, so by the time Friday night came around, I still hadn't had the opportunity to talk to them about my maths result. It was really starting to eat at my temper, and I was becoming more and more edgy as time went on.

"Ash, can you set the table please, Nick will be back with dinner any minute." Ryan called from the kitchen.

"Can't you do it?" I called back, slightly snappier than I'd intended. Only when the clutter of dishes stopped I knew what was coming.

"Do you have a problem?" He stood, leaning against the threshold, hosting an expression of exasperation. I'd been like this all day.

"No." I turned my attention back to the TV, where I was watching my baking show. It was very stress relieving and never provoked any questions from my brothers, I'd found.

"Then quit the attitude and do as I've asked."

"There are other people here who can do it, why me?" I snapped.

"Ashlyn." He warned. "Stop being a baby and get over whatever it is causing this little hissy fit of yours. Set the table, now." With that, he retreated, and I had my choice. In the end, guilt I'd made Ryan angry was what won, so I set the table, but not without making a heap of noise and expressing my frustration as I did so.

"Thankyou." Ryan told me, being neither condescending nor genuine. He had mastered impassive.

Less than five minutes later, Nick had returned with three bags full of all kinds of food, and everyone was sitting down to eat. My parents were still not home, and I was beginning to wonder how long it would be before they had some time at home again, because I wasn't sure if I could go much longer without a full debrief with my mum.

"You took my spot." Austin frowned, semi-jokingly commenting on how I'd taken his usual position towards the end of the table, rather than sitting between Nick and Ryan like I normally would. I just shrugged and pretended to be interested in what food was being served."

"What would you like Ash?" Nick asked, standing, and coming over to help me.

"I can do it myself." I told him, earning a frown.

"Fine." He returned back to his seat and served his own food, but I could sense him watching me. I piled a decent spoonful of rice and three spring rolls onto my plate, but genuinely wasn't hungry. It had been a long week and I just wanted to read, snuggle with Teddy, and go to bed.

I listened along to the boys make their plans for sport tomorrow; who was taking who, whether or not mum and dad were able to drive people (apparently not), times, and rank of importance as to who had to make it to their events. It didn't take long before I'd spaced out though, thinking about what else had happened during my draining week.

I'd spent time with Levi, which was definitely the highlight of my week. We'd stayed late after school one evening to study for a biology test, which was full of laughter and attempting to create the craziest mnemonics we could. I'd helped Gabby finish her portfolio for media and I was so amazed and proud of the work she'd done and the final product. But even though there were some good parts, even just training for track, having not had the discussion with my parents and being able to explain everything with Scarlett was bothering me. Everywhere at school, either her or Jonah appeared somewhere. Jonah was being like usual; attempting to completely ignore my existence, and Scarlett was busy finding ways she could make a snarky comment every time she spoke. It felt almost as if she was trying to expose me, and my past, when she didn't even know what it had been like. She clung to the little information she had – that I hadn't always lived with my brothers and that Jonah hadn't known about me and used it as a weapon in ways that didn't even begin to make sense, yet somehow felt just as threatening as if she really did know. I couldn't tell Levi and have my whole school know about what had been my reality for the past while when I was yet to be open and honest about it with my family, and that was also becoming more and more noticeable as everyone seemed to be settling as if I'd always been part of this family.

"Eat." Nick appeared next to me, a hand on my shoulder, giving me a fright and dragging me back to reality.

"You scared me." I glared.

"You were too busy off daydreaming to eat. You haven't taken one bite."

"I'm not hungry." I grumbled, attempting to shrug off his hand, but his grip remained.

"Don't care."

"Nick?" I waited and turned my head to look him in the eyes. I saw his hardened features soften and knew that was my chance. "Can I eat in the lounge, please?"

"Why?" I cocked my head, expressing my exhaustion and silently trying to persuade him. "Are you going to eat if I let you?"

"Yes."

"Fine. But you have to add something else to your plate first." I looked around at what was left, finding no spring rolls, and since I already had enough rice, I didn't know what else I wanted. Almost sensing my indecisiveness, Nick scooped three pieces of, what I knew to be honey chicken, onto my plate. "Just try it." He spoke before I could protest. "And go before I could change my mind."

I didn't even look to see if any of them watched as I left, just hurried into the lounge room, to the couch, and pressed play, picking up exactly where I'd left off. I felt more relaxed being on my own, but decided, before I ate, to quickly text mum and ask when she'd be home long enough to talk. Having a time would make it easier. 


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