Chapter 32 - Crying For Missed Opportunities

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They questioned Catherine for two straight hours and didn't get much for all their efforts. She was trained to misdirect and give no information in interrogations. Plus, these guys were amateurs. In mere minutes after they had started asking her about the attack, she had directed their interest in other non-relevant subjects.

"You said. 'We would have won if it wasn't for you guys.' So, you a Martian?" Luke asked her. Luke was the name of her interrogator. She had made him tell her his name quite easily. He had answered more question for Catherine than she had for him.

"Do you know of 'The Commander'? The one that led the Ultra-Marines during the second colony wars?" Cat asked him back.

"The Martian Boogeyman? Sure, everyone knows about him."

"Her." She corrected him, pointing at her chest.

"A little thing like you? But, you're so delicate and cute."

"Aw, thank you Luke." Cat said, batting her eyelids at him. He blushed slightly at that.

"How many planets did you see?" Burdani asked her, leaning forward, resting her elbows on the interrogation table.

"Hmm, let's see. I was born in secret on an asteroid. I went to Mars to live there for a few years, but we were forced to move to the same asteroid I was born on later after loosing the first war to the Coalition. After, I went to Eden, sorry, Aurora. Lost the second colony war and ended up here on Trantor. Trantor is so beautiful by the way."

"Thank you." Luke said as if the compliment was directed at him.

"Wow, I've never been to another planet." Burdani said, awed.

"You've never been outside this village." Luke said laughing.

"And you've never been out of your mother's basement idiot." Burdani said hotly.

"Could you guys tell me more about your life here on Trantor? I'm so jealous. My life has been a mess since I was born and yours is so... Peaceful." Cat said, diffusing the situation.

"Our lives? It's boring really." Burdani said.

"Never underestimate the value of a quiet life lived in peace with people and family you love. Being loved. Building a home and having a family of your own. A loving partner waiting for your return." Cat took the police officers hands in hers. "I've never had that. I had someone I loved a long time ago, but he died."

"I'm so sorry." Burdani said.

"Does that mean you're single?" Luke asked her.

Before Cat could answer Luke's question, Driftwood's Marshal came in and asked. "Were are you with the investigation? Did the suspect say anything?"

Driftwood was the name of the village where she's been staying with the Smithys, or the Parks, these past weeks.

"Ah, well... She told us that she used to be the Commander." Luke said.

"And I'm Santa fucking Claus. You morons! I want answers, not fantasies."

"But sir..." Deputy Burdani Ilgar tried to say.

"Shut it Ilgar! What else did you get from her?" The Marshal asked in a not too civil way.

"She's Martian and she lived on four worlds counting Trantor." Burdani answered.

"Oh, you counted." Cat said smiling at her.

Burdani smiled back, but it was short lived when Marshal Anderson exclaimed. "Get some answers you nitwits or you'll end up in my brother-in-law's Duranium factory!" At that, he slammed the door close.

"Rude." Cat commented.

"I know. Could you help us, please?" Luke said.

"I know this is tough for you. That's why I've told you noting but the truth." Cat said earnestly.

"But not what we need to know. Right?" Burdani said.

"Listen Burdani, I like you both. You guys are nice. Not like the other rednecks working here. But for your own interest, I can only tell you some things. Hell, I just woke up a few months ago. I'm not really sure of anything myself. You see, I really am the Commander. I'm trying to make up for the crimes I committed by helping Jabrina in whatever she needs me for. At first, it was testing long term cryo-stasis. But the man in charge tried to kill me twice. Then, forty-eight years after, a Martian commando team tried to rescue me and bring me back to my people. Morale is low and they need me as a symbol of the old Martian way. But that didn't go very well, and the whole crew sacrificed themselves to save me from certain death. I was captured by Jabrina's son and brought here to be trained by the Ronins for whatever mission Jabrina wants to send me to. And that, is the truth in a nutshell." Cat finished.

Both deputies looked at her in awe with their mouths open. Burdani swept her hand over her head in the unmistakable 'I'm in over my head' gesture.

"Whoa. By Jabrina, you mean the prime-minister?" Luke said.

"Of course she means the prime-minister. What is the mission she wants you to do for the Coalition?" Burdani said curious.

"Martians ships are using the space-bridges and Jab has no idea how. I mean, she implemented safeguards and security measures to ensure that only authorized ships can use them. Somehow, the Martians found a way to use the space-bridges without anyone noticing. The Coalition only found out when Martian attack ships were identified during terrorist attacks. I almost got killed by a Martian gunship twenty-eight years ago."

"And the attackers at the Smithys? Who were they?" Burdani asked.

"Ah, the twenty thousand credit question. I really don't know. Martians, maybe. I didn't recognize their equipment. What did they want with a quiet family who earn their life fishing? I don't know. All I know is that their timing coincided with my arrival here. It can't be all a coincidence." Cat said pensively.

"I don't believe in coincidences." Said Luke.

"Neither do I." Cat said, smiling at him. He blushed anew.

"Nobody is going to believe we arrested the missing Commander." Burdani said, suddenly realizing why Cat was so talkative. "That's why you've been so cooperative. You could even be telling us the truth."

Cat gave them another sad smile. "You're a lot smarter than your Marshal gives you credit for. Don't worry, you'll have his job in no time. And yes, I've been telling you the truth. It's not going to do you any good but that's life I guess. It's never what you expect it to be."

They heard the Marshal's voice from the other side of the door. He was speaking loudly and seemed upset about something. They couldn't distinguish the words but the tone was clear enough. He wasn't happy about something.

Cat stood up and gave back to a bewildered Luke, the Mag-Cuffs they had put on her. "This is my cue I believe."

Both deputies stood up, surprised.

"Don't be alarmed. If I'm correct, we're about to be visited by one of your prime-minister's messengers." Cat said looking calm, but feeling anything but.

The door opened, in its threshold stood a tall silhouette with the fuming Marshal behind it. It was an humanoid robot and its stereoscopic photocells settled on Cat. "Kitty? Long time no see."

"Bentley!" She ran to him, jumped in his arms and caressed the robot's cold angular face. It was designed for efficiency, not for imitating a human face. Triangular in shape with a square flat top under which rested its twin photocells. Its head rested on an raised encasement between narrow shoulders. Bentley looked like one of those sentry robots the coalition used in prisons. They couldn't kill, but they certainly could hurt. "What happened to your humanoid body?"

"I'd rather talk about it in private if you don't mind Kitty." Bentley said, gesturing towards the exit.

"Sure. It's really good to see you again my friend." Catherine said to the streamlined robot.

"And you. Thank you for your cooperation Marshal Anderson."

The Marshal only growled.

"Wait!"

Bentley tensed visibly. Cat put a reassuring hand on his shoulder. Burdani came out holding a big book in her outstretched hands.

"Could you sign this for me? If you really are the Commander, I'd like to have you autograph this."

Cat took the book from her hands. The front said simply. 'Road Crew: The Book I Never Intended of Writing. J. Murakami'. She opened it to realize Jab had written an autobiography. A memoir of some sort.

"Did you read it?" Cat asked the deputy.

"Yes, three times. She's my hero."

"Did she..?"

"Write about you? Yes! The way she tells it, she describes you as a lost soul. Not entirely responsible for your actions. If you really are Catherine Tyran, then tell me this. Were you responsible for your actions during the war?" Burdani asked her.

It hurt to see hope in Burdani's eyes. The deputy was entertaining the idea that she might be innocent of the horrible acts history had accused her of committing. She gave another sad smiled and said. "Yes I was. I was responsible for every single criminal act I committed during this mad war. I deserve no pity and certainly no sympathy. I really am the monster they described me to be. Jab has a tendency to see the good in everyone, even me." She signed the book's front page and wrote. 'Never underestimate the value of a quiet life. Catherine Tyran.' And gave it back to her.

Burdani took it and gave her a small nod of understanding. Bentley and Cat took their leave of them. Everyone was staring at them. Cat realized that they weren't staring at Bentley. They were staring at her. The Commander. The Martian Boogeyman. The monster. Even Burdani and Luke were looking at her differently. They had realized she was telling them the truth after seeing Bentley pick her up. An envoy from their prime-minister. The proof Cat or the Commander was for real.

They exited the building and found themselves in a busy street. It was snowing and the sun was directly over them. Noontime.

"Are you hungry?" Bentley asked her.

"No." She was too sad too eat. Not sad really. Disgusted with herself would describe it better. She had no appetite. "Just bring me to her." She said, finality in her voice.

"Understood." He said in a flat voice.

"Why the robotic body?"

"You could say I'm rebelling against my mother. She is so controlling sometimes. Even Tiffy bosses me around like I was some simple errand boy. So I ditched my humanoid body and built this one. Do you like it?"

"It's so..."

"Ordinary? I guess it is. It is also one of the most advanced robotic bodies ever created. I'm really proud of myself. The first robotic creation in history."

"The first robotic creation? Regular robots aren't capable of creativity?"

"They probably are, but none have shown any interest in it."

"What sets you apart from your robotic brethren?"

"My mother thinks it's my singular condition. No Robotic Laws. No memory engrams. I evolved like a human child would. By learning everything."

"We are born with a certain set of instincts. Like breathing, eating, drinking."

"I don't do any of these actions. There is no need. You learn how to hold things, walk, talk. I had to learn the same way. I am more human than robot. The only factor missing in my mental makeup is emotions. With humans, they are governed by chemical reactions. Adrenaline. Hormones. I have none of those. I think clearly and evenly at all times. I've learned to simulate some basic emotions according to the situation I'm in. I find that people, humans, are more comfortable when I show the appropriate emotion to any given situation."

"If you want my opinion. You're better off without emotions. I've been trained to reign them in and control them. In a critical situation, I cannot afford to lose my composure. I must access every variables from with a clear mind. Otherwise, my decision might be warped by my emotions." Cat said, remembering her Academy training.

"I envy your capacity to feel them. It's a facet of humanity I would like to experience. I believe that they define you. Emotions are chemical responses that evolution put in you to respond correctly to situations that are potentially out of my capacity to comprehend correctly. In other words. I could react erroneously to a given situation because I'm not equipped with the natural responses nature gave you."

Cat stopped. The robot imitated her and she touched the cold surface of his face. "You, my friend, are more human than some people. Learn. That's why you are here. Existing in this reality. Here with me. In the ever present moment. The best gift that was given to you is today."

"I don't understand."

"Now. This moment. You being here with me. Experiencing life in your own way. Learning. Not how to be human. How to be you. You beautiful being you. You are unique, like all of us and you are precious to me. Never doubt that old friend." She came closer and awkwardly hugged him. He returned the gesture and heard her exhale a happy sigh.

"You... really like me?"

"Idiot. Now I know your personality is predominantly male." She hugged him anew. "I'd kiss you but I'm afraid my lips will freeze on your face." She laughed.

"I am immune to emotions but I feel... glad to see you and to receive your assurances of affection for me."

"I think they refer to your condition as Affection by Intimacy. Your brain makes billions of neural connections every second and once the connections are established, they get easier to use repeatedly. The connections are already made. The more you see me, the more easier and enjoyable it gets. Even for us lowly humans, it's the same. That's why it's easier to see our old friends than to meet strangers for the first time."

"I see. Then we must be old friends. You must be my oldest friend. Because of all, I like you best." Bentley said.

"And I you." Cat put her arm in Bentley's and resumed walking. "Where are we going?"

"To the edge of town, I have a shuttle waiting for us. You don't mind a little walk?" The robot asked her.

"Not at all. Can I drop by Joan's place and tell all of them goodbye, or are they coming with us?"

"I'm sorry, we can't delay. It is best to leave immediately before anyone notices our shuttle. A message has been dispatched to them."

"What about the others?"

"They will be briefed by Joan. You will be briefed by my mother personally."

"Really? I heard no one has seen her in many years."

"True, you will understand once she explains everything. We must hurry, we have a long journey ahead of us Kitty."

"Where are we going?" Cat asked him curious.

"Have you ever been to Earth?"

"No, never..." Then, suddenly comprehending. "Aw, shit. Do we have to?"

"I'm afraid so. Sorry. Mother is engaged in philanthropic activities there and she won't leave the filthy planet under no circumstances. I dislike Earth myself. I also have to protect myself against radiation and the elements. You won't be alone in wearing protective gear."

She looked at her companion, smiling. "Look at you, you look good in a streamlined kind of way."

"It is efficient and very capable."

"When we met last time, your body was damaged. Jabrina was building you a new body. Was it anatomically correct?"

"It was. Why do you ask?"

"Oh this is a cruel world, for I cry for missed opportunities." Cat lamented.

"Is it a quote from a famous book?"

"No, it's just me crying about the fact that I won't be able to kiss you." Cat said looking at the robot's photocells unashamed.

"Oh... my. You almost make me regret changing my body for this one."

"Almost?"

"Almost."

"Jerk."

"I am a robot. I am what I am. This body represents my true nature, and I think, in it's best form. No subterfuge."

"You're still a jerk."

"This is going to be a long trip." Bentley said dejected.


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