Trigger warning: this chapter contains mentions of drug abuse, alcohol abuse, and suicide. If you are uncomfortable with any of the following topics please skip this chapter.

I wake up in a hospital room with no memories of what happened the night before. I feel my head and immediately take my hand away due to the pain I just caused myself. I look around and see my boyfriend Ashton sitting on the couch looking at his phone.

"Babe," I say. Ashton looks up and rushes over to my side. He kisses my cheek and I kiss his. "Why am I in the hospital?" 

"You seriously don't remember?"

"No. I seriously don't."

"Last night I got a call at like one in the morning that you were admitted into the hospital." He explains.

"Do you know what happened before I got into the hospital?"

"Yeah." He starts. "Last night you got really high and really drunk. You got high on weed and decided it was a good idea to also get drunk. I wasn't there but from what the neighbours told me, you were about to jump off the roof because you wanted to kill yourself."

"What?" I ask confused.

"Baby I need you, to be honest with me. Do you want to kill yourself?" Ashton asks holding both of my hands. I feel tears start to swell up in my eyes. A tear falls from my eyes onto Ashton's hand as I look up at him.

"I thought I hid it well," I say with a shaky voice. Ash pulls me into a tight hug as I cry into his shoulder.

"Sweetheart you need to tell me if you feel like this." He says kindly. I nod and I end up crying myself to sleep in Ashton's arms.