➳No trigger warnings

The cats in the alleyway were nice to ranboo. They let him sleep in the cardboard boxes they normally reserved for their kitten. They sometimes brought Ranboo a dead rat or bird to eat. One of them had even groomed him once.

Ranboo made sure he returned the kindness. He would bring the cats tuna that he stole from stores, guard the kittens when their mothers were away, and give pets. The cats were Ranboo's only friends, and he was ok with that.

Ranboo wasn't sure if he had other friends. He didn't remember any, and if he didn't' remember then it probably wasn't important. He knew he didn't have a family. That was a fact that was engraved on his mind.

Ranboo ran a hand through his greasy half white half black hair. He hadn't showered in weeks. He hadn't had a decent meal in a while. He couldn't remember the last time he ate, but he assumed it was a while ago. His stomach grumbled but Ranboo ignored it. The back allies of L'manburg were not a pleasant place, but it was a safe spot for freaks like him.

That's what everyone called him, a freak. Harsh words left scars in his memories. The kids didn't like his half white half black skin. He would wear sunglasses to hide his green and red eyes. Ranboo liked to pretend like he didn't care what other people think, but words still hurt.

"Hey, Patches!" Ranboo greeted a brown cat. Patches was always friendly towards Ranboo.

Patches trotted up to Ranboo and rubbed her face on his leg. Ranboo laughed and sat down. Patches climbed into his lap, purring. The boy pet the kitty gently, not wanting to make her mad. Patches always left fur on Ranboo's jeans, but he didn't mind. The warmth the cat radiated was nice.

Patches stood up and jumped out of Ranboo's lap.

"Where ya going Patches?" He asked.

Patches pawed at Ranboo.

"Wha?" Ranboo said. "Ya want me to follow you?"

Patches meowed. Ranboo took that as a yes. Ranboo followed the cat out of the dark alleyway. Ranboo let out a small hiss when he stepped in the sun. The streets of L'manburg were packed. Ranboo grabbed a newspaper from a stand to read while he followed patches. It seemed that there was some newfound tension between L'manburg and Dream SMP.

Patches stopped walking in front of a house. She sat down and started grooming herself.

"Patches what are we doing at someone's house?"

Patches ignored Ranboo. Ranboo sighed. He sat on the doorstep of the house, watching Patches. Why had he decided to follow at cat across the city? Gee, he would probably forget where his alleyway was.

"Hello?" A voice asked behind Ranboo.

Ranboo jumped. He teleported down to the street. Standing at the doorway was a man with blond hair, green robes, and a green and white striped bucket hat.

"Shhh... calm down mate. Whatcha doin' at my house?" The man asked.

Ranboo internally panicked. He picked up Patches and planned to make a run for it.

"Patches?" The man called out. The cat ran from Ranboo's arms and to the blond man. "Did you make a friend Patches?" He cooed at the cat.

Ranboo stood there awkwardly. He wasn't sure if he was in trouble.

"Hey kid, thanks for finding Patches. Wanna come inside?" The man asked.

Ranboo nodded. If Patches trusted the man then Ranboo did too.

The inside of the house was cozy. It was made of oak and spruce wood with carpets, paintings, and tapestries everywhere. Patches sat in front of the cobblestone fireplace in the corner. The man showed Ranboo to a leather chair by the fireplace. It was the most comfortable thing Ranboo had ever sat in.

"Oh sorry, I forgot to introduce myself, I'm Philza but you can call me Phil." The man said. "What's your name?"

"I'm Ranboo."

"So Ranboo, would you like something to eat and drink? It's the least I can do after you found Patches," Phil said. His fatherly instincts kicked in at the sight of the boy's frail and sicky figure.

"Um... sure," Ranboo hesitantly said. His stomach grumbled when he thought about food. Phil seemed trustworthy enough.

Phil made them peppermint tea and brought out a tin of biscuits. They sat by the fireplace. Ranboo was silent as he sipped his tea. It was warm which was nice.

"Terrible weather we've been getting," Phil said, breaking the silence.

Ranboo nodded. He hated the rain but couldn't remember why.

"You're one of few words Mr. Ranboo," Phil commented.

"Oh sorry... " Ranboo whispered. "I just don't have much to say."

"I'm sure you have a story to tell."

"I don't remember much," Ranboo admitted.

Phil stared at the boy for a moment. He got up and started rummaging through his chests. He pulled out a brown leather journal and a pen.

"This is for you," Phil said, bringing over the journal.

Ranboo looked up confused. Why was Phil being so kind to him? He took the journal and pen.

"Now, I want you to write down stuff you want to remember. When you finish with a journal return to me and I'll give you a new one," Phil instructed.

Ranboo wrote down Phil's address and the instructions. His handwriting was small, neat, cursive. He wondered who taught him how to write. Ranboo wrote what he remembered so far. He decided to write a page to keep track of his friends. On it, he wrote Patches and Phil.

"How old do you think you are?" Phil asked Ranboo before he left.

"Um... well I think I'm about 16, but I don't know for sure. I don't even know when my birthday is."

Phil frowned. The poor kid probably never had a birthday party before.

Phil didn't care about Ranboo's appearance. He didn't even mention his flimsy Hawaiian t-shirt and worn-out jeans. Phil had suspicions about Ranboo's living situation but never said anything. He didn't want Ranboo to freak out and stop visiting. Phil respected Ranboo's privacy.

Ranboo started to visit Phil daily. He would tell Phil about his adventures in L'manburg, reading from his journal. One day Ranboo visited Phil's house and he wasn't there.

"Hello!" Ranboo called as he walked inside the house.

"Hello," an unfamiliar voice responded. It was low and monotone, similar to Ranboo's.

A man with pink hair was sitting on Phil's recliner.

Ranboo panicked. "Who are you? Where is Phil?"

"I'm Technoblade, but you can call me Techno," The man said standing up. Techno wore a white peasant blouse and skinny black pants. A long red cape was tired around his shoulders. Golden jewelry and chains adorned his body. Ranboo felt self conscious in his Hawaiian shirt next to this regal-looking man.

"But who are you?" Ranboo asked again.

"I'm Phil's son. And Phil is coming home with a surprise."

"A surprise?" Ranboo asked, his eyes widening.

"Sure thing Ranboo," Techno said.

"How do you know my name?"

"Phil told me about you."

"Oh," that made sense.

The two talked for a while, waiting for Phil to come home. Ranboo learned that Technoblade was a war criminal in 50 different countries. He wasn't sure how he felt about this information. Techno was kind though, underneath his tough exterior was a good soul. Phil arrived 15 minutes later holding three shopping bags. In the first bag was groceries, the second and third bag contained wrapped presents.

"What are these for?" Ranboo asked, holding them up for Phil to see.

Phil smiled. "They're your birthday presents!"

"My birthday?!"

"Yup! Techno and I figured that because you didn't know your real birthday we would celebrate it today."

Ranboo's jaw dropped. He had never gotten a real birthday before, or at least one that he remembered.

Phil had made a half vanilla half chocolate cake last night. They all ate the cake and were merry. Phil and Techno had got him a lot of presents. Phil gave him a new journal, new Hawaiian shirt, and gloves. Techno had got him a business suit for some reason. Techno's logic was that people don't bother someone wearing a suit. Ranboo thanked them. It was the best birthday party he had ever had (he didn't remember any others but still). Ranboo felt a pang of guilt. He hadn't done anything for Phil or Techno.

"I haven't got you anything..." Ranboo said.

"You don't have to. These are gifts," Phil explained.

Ranboo was silent for a moment. "Why are you so nice to me?"

"We care about you."

"But I'm a freak," Ranboo said, trying to hold back tears.

Phil and Techno came over and pulled Ranboo into a hug. The boy relaxed. It had been so long since he got a hug.

"You are not a freak Ranboo," Techno said. He sounded genuine.

"Then why am I all alone... " Ranboo choked out.

Phil and Techno exchanged glances. "Ranboo where do you live?" Phil asked in his soothing manner.

"In an alleyway..." Ranboo admitted.

"By yourself?"

"With the cats, but yeah by myself i guess."

Phil's eyes widened. When Ranboo had calmed down he left the room with Techno. Ranboo heard anxious whispering from the kitchen.

"Oh god the kid's homeless... if only I knew sooner."

"He didn't tell you, don't beat yourself up."

"Oh gee, I can't just send him back to his alleyway. Can we adopt him?"

"Phil! You can't adopt every child without a father figure you see."

"I adopted you."

"Good point."

"Pleaseeeeeeeeee. Maybe he could just live with me for now?"

"Oh my goodness Dad, fine."

Phil happily jumped out of the kitchen. Ranboo was petting Patches on the sofa.

"Hey Ranboo, do you need a place to stay?"

"Uh yeah..."

"How would you like to stay with us?"

Ranboo's face lit up. His green and red eyes widened. "Yes!" He exclaimed.

Later that night Ranboo was writing in his journal. He started a new chapter titled Family. Underneath it he wrote three names: Phil, Techno, and Patches.