"Kate," Ellie shrieked. "What the hell was that back there?" 

Kate had her eyes squeezed closed, she took in a huge shaky breath. "Nothing."

"Nothing?" Ellie walked closer. " It didn't seem like nothing, Kate," and then she shrieked again. "Kate! What—oh my—are you alright?"

It was getting difficult for Kate to breathe, her head was spinning, and she felt exhausted like that time when she was hospitalized. She couldn't speak anything as suddenly a pain she was getting quite familiar with erupted inside her skull, magnifying with the passing seconds.

Right then, Kate recalled she forgot to take her medicines this morning.

Ellie quickly rushed towards her in panic and held Kate's shoulders. "I should call the doctor—"

"No— just—" Kate was groaning now with the amount of pain that made her eyes even throb. Ellie helped her to the chair. 

It was a lot of effort, but somehow Kate managed to point at her bag at the other end of the desk, Ellie got it immediately.

With great difficulty, Kate brought the pills out of the bag Ellie had been holding open before her. Kate gave a grateful look as Ellie helped her sip from a glass of water to swallow the pills.

The pain dulled down after a while. All the while, Ellie had been rubbing Kate's back with a concerned look.

It was an artificial relief, though, that the pills brought a drug-induced numbness that Kate was still trying to get used to.

However, the good thing about her little episode at that moment made what Ellie witnessed earlier a subsequent matter. No matter how much Ellie was interested in Alex's supposed highly misunderstood interest in Kate, she was more concerned about her health.  

So, when Ellie finally began the interrogation, it didn't sound like an interrogation session. Thankfully.

"Was the maniac groping you?" 

But still, it was as much awkward.

Kate cleared her throat. "Nope."

Ellie looked thoughtful. "Were you then mutually groping one another?"

"Hell, no, Ellie!" Kate exhaled a shuddering breath. "We were having an argument over him always breathing down Victor's neck," It wasn't a lie, at least. "And then... like the maniac that man he is, he stalked closer to threaten me."

"Bless the inventor of threats if what I witnessed was a bloody threat!" Ellie threw her hands up in exasperation. "For Cuckoo's sake, Kate, it's crystal clear that he was trying to bewitch you and cheat on his fiance with you."

Putting a hand on Kate's shoulder, Ellie indignantly spoke, "That maniac is really a filthy thing, it seems. While his interest in you is quite interesting, he's bloody engaged with that model, and whatever he's trying to do now is so f*cking wrong."

It was a good thing that Ellie took it upon herself to describe the situation here. Kate couldn't be more relieved.  

"I agree," Kate muttered.

Alex was head to toe, drowned in everything that was wrong. What if he saw the picture right someday? 

Would she live to see that day?

Anyway, it was not that she cared anymore. Too much had transpired in the past months, too much had changed, and too much had been lost. 

Nothing on earth or heaven can bring back the bygone.

When it got too much and all the stress felt suffocating with the pressure of harrowing memories closing in on her from all sides, her sanctuary always saved her. The Sunday visits to Mary's orphanage were regular, but recently, these unannounced visits were getting to the point of being called as regular as well.

That evening, Kate sat on a bench out in the field of the orphanage. Owen was being bounced on her lap. She smiled at the kid's cute giggles and cries of excitement.

"I'm sorry, Kate," Mary sighed, looking sympathetically at her. "No matter how much I want to, I can't go against the rules and give Owen to you."

Just like how Kate had guessed, surely her application for adoption got rejected. The deadly disease ticking like a time bomb inside her skull won this round.

Kate's eyes teared up, but she managed to give a shaky smile. "I understand, Mother."

She understood. She clearly did. 

Owen deserved the best. All these children deserved the best. They deserved a secure life and a stable environment to grow up in... none of which Kate would be able to provide at the moment.

Hell, she did not even know if she was going to be alive the next year or six feet under the ground, literally!

"But not to worry, I'll visit the kids and my Owen as much as I can, can't I?" Kate asked, blinking away the tears, her fingers trailing through Owen's cute little hair on top of his head.

Mother nodded, smiling as well. "Of course, you can."

A group of kids ran past them, chasing a giggling little girl with her blond curls flying everywhere around her face. Owen whirled his head back, looking at them with his jaw hanging open, drool dripping down on his chest. The boy looked quite alert. He even flailed his fists strongly and shrieked a little as if protesting against such outrageous sound pollution around him.

"Are you going to join our charity brunch next month?" Mother asked after a while of silence.

"I definitely will," Kate beamed, inhaling a short breath, the genuine excitement very evident on her face. "Can't miss the chance to see these lovely little people having fun, showing their talents to the guests, and probably meet people who'll adopt them soon... give them a family, a loving home."

Twice a year, the orphanage arranged these charity brunches where they motivate people from all classes of society to contribute in some way to make these children's lives better. 

Kate had decided to volunteer with the preparations instead of just being a guest. She didn't have a lot of money but surely could be a part of the brunch this way.

--

Alex sighed, looking out the window of his living room. His duplex apartment had a nice view, but at that moment, it did nothing to improve his mood. 

After that almost kiss this morning, Alex stormed out of the boutique with his heart thundering in his throat. Memories of the countless times he had kissed Kate in the past had never left him, but the moment his lips had grazed hers - he swore he felt something come undone inside his chest. He recalled the taste of her lips, the sound of her moans, and the look in her eyes during their lovemaking. 

This robust desire boiled in his veins to turn around, go back to her office, and whisk her away to a faraway place to relive those old memories and reminisce the passion they shared.

But it couldn't be. 

So, instead, he called Maya and met her at a restaurant, and did not stop her but indulged himself in reciprocating when she pulled him into a kiss. But sadly, it still did not feel right - like all those other times Maya kissed him. It tasted bland and lacked any passion that he found always being inevitably ignited in him while kissing Kate. 

Maya seemed obliviously pleased, though, clearly not sharing Alex's opinion about their intimacy. 

It just infuriated Alex further.

Everything felt wrong.

"You met Kate?" It didn't sound like a question. Sitting on the couch across from Alex, Tamara Leon more like stated it.

Alex looked at his mother, surprised. 

How had she come to know about it?

"Maya told me," Tamara answered before Alex could even voice the question.

Alex groaned and then fell quiet. He needed to warn Maya to stop whatever she was doing. The last thing he needed was a fiance who had the habit of unnecessarily and irritatingly putting news from one place to the other. 

"She's my new client's business partner," Alex quietly said, turning to look out the window again. 

"You need to move on from that treacherous woman, son," Tamara looked firm, but her gaze was soft on her son, who was now giving her quite an incredulous look.

"You've arrived to attend my engagement party with Maya, and you still imply that I haven't moved on from Kate?" Alex snapped. However, seeing Tamara flinch, he exhaled a long breath, his scowl dissolving. 

He realized he had gotten exceedingly defensive, his behavior giving away things he detested himself.

It was true he hated Kate for breaking his heart, but it was also as much true that he couldn't help but think about her every single second.

Tamara placed a comforting hand on Alex's. "I just want to see my only son happy."

He hadn't informed his mother of the fact that his engagement to Maya was more of a business agreement than a relationship based on love or such emotions.  However, it seemed like that, despite his closed lips, Tamara still was beginning to see through. 

Tamara had never despised Kate in the past, but since Kate's real face came to light, Tamara had begun to hate her with a passion. And it was evident that after a particularly informative chat with Maya, Tamara was quite determined now to protect her only son from the likes of Kate. 

"I've moved on, mom. I really have." It was as if he wasn't convincing his mother but himself instead. "Kate will receive the divorce papers in a couple of days. Our marriage will finally end." His voice involuntarily choked. His little give-away there was out of his control. 

--

Kate slumped into the comfy pillow, her eyes staring at the IV line attached to the back of her palm. 

It didn't look extraordinarily thrilling as she had presumed what Chemotherapy would be like. 

After she arrived at the hospital, she was taken to the infusion suit and was given pre-medications. When she inquired about it, the nurse - a middle-aged woman with a permanent warm smile plastered on her face - informed her that it was just anti-nausea pills. The nurse then started an IV in her arm and left, coming back every ten minutes after to check if everything was going alright.

The sound of a sudden long snore had Kate look to her right. She smiled at the sight.

Victor had volunteered to be her guardian angel during the one hour that required all the drugs to go into her system. He had been looking tired after a busy workday, and Kate suggested that he lie down on the sofa and talk from there. That way, he could get some rest too.

Soon, right before Kate's eyes, Victor's heavy lids lost pathetically in the battle of staying open; his slurring words trailed off and were replaced with soft snores since then. 

Kate was pleased that he was finally getting some rest and not worrying over her like a maniac mother hen.

It got boring soon, though, the same sight of Victor's sleeping form and the IV attached to her hand. The room had not had much furniture too, and the open window at her left had the view blocked by branches of some trees hale with blooming leaves.

Kate was just thinking of turning the TV on and watching something at low volume, but startling her, the door to her room creaked open a little. She thought that the nurse had come back again, but it was instead a small head of a girl around four or five years that peeked in. Two round eyes filled with mischief stared at Kate. The girl's small hands held the door ajar. The little hospital gown and scarf around the girl's head told that this child had gone through quite a number of Chemotherapy sessions already at such an early age.

Kate recalled seeing other kids going through cancer treatments wandering around or sitting out in the hallway. The oncology department was full of fighters of different ages.

A small smile formed on Kate's lips, and the little girl mirrored that smile from the door after a second. 

Kate gestured with her free hand for the girl to come in. Immediately the little girl was striding inside, the door closing behind her. 

"My name is Lala. What is youl name?" The girl chirped, her hands now placed on the edge of Kate's bed.

Kate couldn't help but chuckle. It seemed this little munchkin pronounced "R" as "L" and Kate had found a new friend to hang out with during this long hour.

"Kate. Which room are you..." 

But cutting in, Victor loudly snored again, the sound imitating a lion's roar. Needless to say, the rest of the conscious people in the room burst out into laughter.

And since then, a cute new friendship was formed. Kate was well informed of all the side effects of Chemotherapy by the very experienced Lara--or Lala--as she called herself.

"My hail will be blue when it comes out again."

Kate had to bite her lip to hold back a laugh at the sight of Lara's utterly serious face. "How can you be so sure?"

"They give me these blue tablets evely molning! Now my nails have gotten a lill blue because of them, see..., so my hail will be too."

Kids have weird logic for almost everything, and the purest form of innocence can be blamed for it.

"I guess then my hair will be blue too in the future," Kate grinned, helping Lara up the bed and snug beside her. "It isn't something bad, though."

Lara looked hopeful.

--

"Once again, Kate, why don't you just stay at my place?" The worry and fear were evident on Victor's face, his forehead marring with lines. "The doctor clearly said that the side effects of Chemotherapy will be showing up. What if you feel ill? You won't even stay at Ellie's place or have one of us stay over at yours."

Kate reached up to smooth up those lines on his forehead. "I've still got some time to enjoy my freedom until those side effects get severe. The first Cycle of Chemos is lighter, the doctor said, remember?"

Besides, she didn't want to be more of a burden to Victor and Ellie, they were already doing so much for her, and she doubted she would ever be able to repay them.

Victor grunted in response and then sighed. Cupping her cheek with a palm, he dropped a quick kiss on her head. "You'll keep the phone close to you, and my number is on your speed dial, right? And don't forget about eating only food that is easily digestible. That means no spice or fast food or..."

Kate nodded with a roll of her eyes. "Aye, aye, captain, I get it all. Now don't have a heart attack over it!"

Victor smirked, his eyes crinkling at the corners with mirth. "You feel a slight bit unwell, and you'll be calling me," he ordered firmly before engulfing her in a bear hug. "And don't forget to give Ellie a call, too, after you get in. She's pissed that you asked me to accompany you for this round instead of her."

"I will," Kate replied with a smile and watched Victor get in his car. 

Feeling slightly lethargic from the drugs just an hour ago shoved into her system, Kate sauntered into the building relatively slower... unaware of a pair of angry eyes' scrutiny from afar. She was even oblivious to the footsteps following her.

It was only when she reached her apartment door and was tiredly surfing for the keys in her bag was when she realized someone had come to stand behind her.

Instinctively feeling a little weary, Kate looked back over her shoulder. A frown appeared on her forehead, seeing that it was the last person she expected to stand before her apartment and that too... with the worst of scowls darkening his face.

By how he looked as though he was absolutely ready to kill someone - Kate guessed he had seen her with Victor. Till now, she had seen enough of Alex's tendencies to reach just that one conclusion, and so it was not hard for her to predict that he was probably calling her all kinds of s*uts in his mind. 

The fact that his polluted thoughts had yet again overpowered his mind was quite transparent. And it made Kate take a step back, wanting to stay away from what Alex had let himself become. She refused to hear more of his nonsense reproaches. 

Not now, not ever anymore. 

"What made you come here?" she didn't bother restraining the irritation in her tone.

Alex clenched his jaw. His lips pressed into a thin line. "I didn't know only Victor could come here. Does Neil drop by as well?"

The filthy indication made her stomach turn. It was absolutely appalling that this man, who had once claimed to love her - with all his heart, could think so disgustingly about her.

"No," she managed to reply coolly. "Nowadays, only Victor it is, for he cares about me that much, and, undeniably, I enjoy his company. A lot. Just like you do Maya's." 

The innuendo had the desired effect.

If it was possible, Alex's expression turned even more furious. "Maya and I are serious. We're about to get married..."

This news was getting quite old.

"Who said Victor and I aren't serious?" Tilting her head to the side, Kate watched with satisfaction as the fury slowly dulled on Alex's face, with what she had insinuated sinking quickly into his stupid brain. 

If it's meant to burn no matter what, then pouring some patrol in as well can't be that great of a sin. Rather have one single explosion to end it all and evade the excruciatingly painful process of skin and flesh and bones burning into ashes.

His shoulders stiffened, and it seemed as though he had stopped breathing. There was jealousy, anger, and fear, but the immeasurable distress was what took over all those other emotions in his eyes. It caught her off-guard, and she had this urge to gather all that his eyes silently depicted, put them in one place, and transform them into words that she wanted to hear. 

But she looked away instead. 

It would be only foolishness to listen to her heart.

And to prove just that, Alex said in a chilling cold voice, "At last, that illegitimate child of yours will get a name, huh."

It was amusing how he never failed to cross that limit and reach where it hurt the most.

His words startled her. Like a slap, it stung. The hurt was, to a degree, more than what any physical assault could ever bring. Surprisingly, Kate was way too exhausted even to flinch. It was a terrifying burned-out state.

"If the reason for your very much unwanted visit is only to irritate me with your rubbish gibbering, Leon, then know that I don't have time for it." Kate sighed, turning to the side a little and busying herself on opening the door finally. 

"I'm here to give you these—"

Kate looked back at his outstretched hand, which appeared with two envelopes from inside his coat. Giving a skeptical look, Kate took the offered envelopes with some hesitance.  

"It's the invitation card for Maya and my engagement party next week," Alex said blankly. "And the other one's the divorce papers. Sign them as fast as possible."

Kate stood there petrified. 

Not sparing a glance back, Alex stormed off. 

A drop of disobedient tear fell and soaked into one of the envelopes. For a while, she stared blankly at the wet circle the warm liquid created before stepping into her apartment finally and closing the door behind her. 

Drowsily she walked toward her bed. Fatigue, like never before, deluged her from head to toe. How her insides ached at that moment, she couldn't say if it was the after-effect of her first Chemotherapy the reason or the decisive conclusion of an already severed marriage. 

She laid with the envelopes clutched into her hands that night, the fatigue growing so strong that she had no other way but to involuntarily give in to it, with the inert knowledge of tears rolling down her face, the soft pillow - drenched and cold.

~

YES, I couldn't help