Chapter 29: Humiliation

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I stood there. Outside of school, contemplating on what I should do next. I was strongly leaning towards sprinting in the other direction, but my feet were plastered to the ground. I stared at it and I think I was stood their for a minimum of seven minutes.

"You're going to have to move, you know" Eliza said in my ear. She was stood besides me, but I'm pretty sure she was a few seconds away from going in. And I was right. "Look, I want to be here for your existential crisis. But I need to go to history and explain to her why I didn't do the homework" she said, fixing my hair slightly and walking off. I rolled my eyes, of course she would find any reason to not do her homework.

"You've been so unhelpful today" I called behind her, realising that it was probably the worst comeback ever.

"You must be really contemplating this, I've never seen you go without sarcasm for so long" Levi said. He was also stood besides me, he told me he would be there for me for every step of the way, and that was exactly what he was doing.

"Hilarious" I replied sarcastically, just to prove that I was completely fine but even that was weak.

I stood there for another moment before the school bell rang, I could hear it from out here, and I knew immediately that I should do something. So I did. I grabbed Levi's hand and despite him being shocked, he continued to lead me through the school door. I realised that I was being stupid, why should anybody actually care about who I was going out with, even if it was the supposed 'hottest guy in school'. I shouldn't matter to anybody but me. As somebody who believes so much about empowerment, I really should not care about what other people thought of me, I never had. And I shouldn't start now.

But when we did actually go through the doors, everything was how I expected it to be. Whilst most schools probably ran on electricity, ours was powered by gossip. Any new type of gossip was the talk of the schools, ranging from the freshmen to the teachers. As soon as Levi and I were in the sights of students and teachers, whispers erupted around the hallway. I couldn't distinctly hear what they were all saying but it would be naive to think that they were talking about anybody but us.

I felt my grip loosen in Levi's hand, but whilst mine loosened his tightened. He looked down at me and smiled encouragingly whispering "they'll get over it soon" in my ear. I nodded, walking towards the end of the hall, my palms still in his, him trailing behind me. I first went to the nurse's office, Levi accompanying me.

I walked in, taking in the familiar smell of latex gloves, before Nurse Addie made eye contact with me. "Hi Nurse Addie" I greeted.

"Hi sweetheart. Are you here for you medication?" She asked politely.

Nope, just here chat, minutes before class starts.

Instead I nodded, "Yes please, I forgot to have some at home, I'm sorry"

"No need to apologise sweetheart, and Levi you too?" She turned to Levi as my eyes widened.

He nodded.

When she turned around to the medicine cabinet I turned to Levi "you need to take pills too?"

He smiled "surprise book girl"

"You didn't tell me" I stated

He chuckled "I did, on the roof, you just forgot"

"That's why you didn't have alcohol" I whispered, more to myself than him but obviously he heard me.

"That, and you do not want to see me drunk" he smirked. "Plus, if I drank the doctors would be on my ass"

"I've never been drunk before" I shrugged

I could tell Levi was about to say something, but was interrupted by Nurse Addie. "I sure hope not young lady, you're under the legal age" she said strictly. "Also, pills and-"

"Alcohol should not mix, yeah I know" I finished off for her as she laughed. She handed us both our medication along with a cup of water.

She handed me my Xanax and SSRI, and handed Levi his pills. I put both in my mouth before swallowing with water. When I was done, I scrunched up my face in disgust. No matter how many times I swallowed those fucking pills, I could never get over the taste of them.

"I hate those fucking pills" I muttered, handing the cup back to Nurse Addie and turning to Levi who was chuckling in amusement.

"What?" I pouted.

He shook his head as if saying nothing, "you're just cute, that's all"

I rolled my eyes, only Levi.

"Are you two going out?" Nurse Addie asked us as we turned to her.

I shyly nodded.

"Aw bless you two" she smiled "now get out"

We both laughed, Levi snaking his arm behind my waist before leading me out of the room. But of course, as soon as we were in the view of the public, more whispers echoed around the hall. He lead me to my locker, but the eyes followed us.

"Did they do this when you and Katherine first went out?" I asked, and I knew he hated it when I brought up Katherine but I couldn't stop myself from asking.

"I'd been going out with Katherine since eighth grade, middle school wasn't as gossipy as high school" He shrugged.

"I just never imagined myself to be in this position before" I responded quietly, suddenly extremely interested in my shoes.

"Hey" He murmured as he tilted my chin up "It doesn't matter how it is, I like you. That's all that matters" I nodded. He was right. Nobody should ever make me nervous for going out with Levi when I liked him and he liked me. Although looking behind Levi I saw a crowd of people basically staring at us, of course as soon as I looked their way, they diverted their eyes from us. "People are watching aren't they?" He asked suddenly.

I bit my lip.

"If people are so interested, then let's give them a show" he whispered, before planting his lips on mine. Butterflies scattered across my stomach as he softly moved his lips against mine. It was suddenly as if everybody watching had disappeared, I was so consumed in the kiss that it no longer mattered what anybody else was doing. It didn't feel like the first time, we didn't even get proper second time because of Jordan. This time it was less hesitant, more confident. We were soaked in rain the first time, this time he was egotistical and cocky and I kinda liked it. His hands reached into my hair pulling my hair band down, allowing my hair to fall down passed my shoulders. It felt like ages before we pulled away, and when we did I turned to the mirror on the door of my locker to notice my cheeks glowing red.

"You look nice with your hair out" he smiled, slightly breathless from the kiss.

I nodded, not finding words.

"It's amazing how much you blush" he commented, smirking slightly, clearly breathless from the kiss.

"I'm not good with human contact" I whispered in embarrassment, fully aware of how many people were staring.

"You're cute" he chuckled, kissing my cheek before saying "I've got bio, I'll see you at lunch, book girl"

I sighed, wondering how I was going to be able to stand being the centre of attention for any longer. I shut my locker door, closing my eyes and sighing, as if that would magically make all the spectators disappear.

The bell rang once again and I was definitely late which wasn't much of a surprise. I had psychology first period which was relieving considering none of Katherine's girls were actually smart enough to do psychology. I thought psychology would be a normal lesson like it normally was, considering the class was not filled with those who would gossip, but I was seriously wrong.

"So you and Knight?" I was asked by Blake as soon as I entered the room.

"Is that a question?" I asked nervously, deflecting the point.

"More of a statement of disbelief" He shrugged as I took a seat in my usual place, he was very careful in making sure he didn't sit too close to me, I strongly believed it was because I was 'taken'.

"Why is that such a shock?" I asked, slightly offended.

"I never pictured you to be the: date the popular guy and make out in public with him" he said casually as my cheeks immediately heated up.

"You heard about that?" I asked, amazed that gossip could basically travel faster than the speed of light in our school.

He smiled a sad smile "Kinda hard to miss, I guess" he shrugged "I just never thought you'd be the type to go for egotistical bad boys"

I sighed "He's not egotistical and no way in hell is he a bad boy, either"

"Right, he isn't the one who cheated on Katherine White" He muttered as I bit my lip.

Throughout my entire time of liking Levi, I hadn't realised that he had cheated on his girlfriend of four years. Isn't that why I hated him in the library the first day I spoke to him. However, I still found myself defending him. "He had his reasons" I said quietly, not too sure myself.

"Juliette, you don't have reasons for cheating" Blake said sternly as I found myself putting my hands on my face in annoyance.

"Can you stop please?" I said quietly once again, my voice coming out muffled through my hands as I placed them down once again.

"Sorry, I didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable" he apologised but I knew this was not the end. "But Juliette, can you really trust him?"

"I'm done with this conversation" I simply stated.

"Juliette-" he began

"No" I interrupted "No. I don't want to hear what you say. Levi is my boyfriend, of course I trust him so don't you dare think about turning me against him just because of your stupid little crush on me" I immediately regretted what I said, covering my mouth when I did.

That was so mean, why on earth did I do that?

"You know?" He asked quietly "you know that I liked you?"

I nodded not finding any other words to say.

"I thought you were nice" he muttered "I guess I was wrong"

For the rest of the lesson we were silent, we didn't say one word to each other and I didn't know whether that made me relieved or whether that made me feel bad. I felt really guilty for shouting at him and I felt really guilty for just being overall mean. But I just couldn't stand the fact that he was saying shit about Levi, and as confused as I felt about him cheating on Katherine, I still knew I could trust him.

The rest of the school day went past pretty fast actually. I had double psychology which was pretty awkward and quiet, but the lesson itself was not bad. I then had two free periods and lunch, which was all spent at the Library. I didn't once see Levi throughout the entire day, which partially worried me but I was pretty sure he was fine.

Last period however was one I don't think I could have forgotten.

It was history which already meant I was pretty much freaking out. This was the lesson which almost everybody took, including Eliza, Jordan, Levi, Katherine and her minions. So I already knew shit was going to go down.

I sat down just behind my usual seat, at the front of the class, alone. But I was pleasantly surprised when Levi decided to surprise me and sit besides me.

"You know," I began "the last time you sat next to me in school, I had a panic attack" I said teasingly as the tips of his ears burned red.

He grinned "but last time, I couldn't do this" he began as he leaned forwards, attempting to place his lips on mine.

I giggled, shaking my head as I turned away "I don't do PDA" I said, despite knowing that we kissed in front of a huge crowd of people this morning.

He pouted as I smiled "But I do"

"Well then, I guess it's just something you should get used to" I teased once again as I crossed my arms over my chest, as a defiant gesture.

"You look extremely hot when you do that" he whispered, moving my hair from my ear in order for me to hear.

I didn't turn to face him. "I'm not falling for that"

"Miss Robinson is staring at you" he shrugged.

My head darted to his side, I could not miss anything to do with history, the requirements of this subject were already too high, and to not pay attention is like asking to fail. I did, however, notice once I turned that the teacher wasn't even facing me, but helping two other students at the back. Before I could even get a word out, Levi's lips were on mine. My eyes widened but I still found myself kissing back. My neck and cheeks were burning due to the PDA, and I had realised that I shared this class with many people I didn't like, but I still couldn't find myself taking my lips off his.

His lips moved smoothly against mine, his arms finding their way to wrap themselves against my waist. I straightened up when my mind processed where we were, pushing my body away from his. I'm sure my cheeks were red and I looked completely flustered. I was so strongly set on not allowing Levi kiss me in public, it wasn't the best view for other people but I couldn't help it. Once his lips were on mine, I found myself lost in our own world. I just couldn't help but think about the two of us. It wasn't about anybody else.

"Stop" I muttered weakly when I pulled back.

His hands moved my hair from my face. "Maybe one day, you won't blush when I kiss you" he said teasingly.

"Unlikely" I stated "maybe one day, you won't kiss me in public"

"Unlikely" he mimicked.

I laughed "Just do your work!" I scolded

"How am I supposed to keep my eyes off of you, though?" He teased, his hands finding its way on my waist, brushing my sides slightly as I shivered.

"I'm moving back to my spot" I declared, standing up and grabbing all of my stuff.

"No don't go" he whined as I smiled.

I carried my stuff to the front of the room where I would normally sit, setting my things down and bringing out my books from my bag. I began writing up what we were supposed to be doing, before I felt a presence besides me.

"I'm not gonna kiss you" I muttered absentmindedly

"Lord, I hope not" I heard a female voice from next to me. I looked up to see Katherine White stood besides me, her arms folded, sending a glare my way. Her, now brown, hair flowed down her shoulders as she scowled at me.

Written: 30/10/15 (Focus Day)
Posted: 5/03/16 (P.S I totally forgot to update yesterday and I'm such a bad person wow)

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