Siah stretched, getting out of his bed on a Friday morning. The shop was closed from today, Thursday, to Monday, much to his delight. Mr. Frank had some renovations getting done and he was thankful for the day off regardless.

He'd been increasingly tired lately—and not just because of work. He was emotionally drained around this time of year. He had been for a while, but he hated to talk about it. The only person who could truly understand was his father, but he knew his dad was probably just getting over the emotional hump as well.

December was when it usually started. His mothers birthday was on New Years Eve. He left Texas early this year, but he still left her flowers like he did every year since she passed. He spent her birthday happily this year—a part of him was still carrying guilt for that, but he tried to let it go.

February, the third specifically, was the day she died and also they day Marlei was born. And around last week, on March sixth was the day Marlei passed away.

He took Marlei's death especially hard because he wasn't even there when she died. He was at school, he remembered the day like it was yesterday. He was only 11, in the sixth grade when his teacher got the call for early dismissal.

He went to the office, actually excited to see Marlei and his dad, since after losing his mom, they were what kept him grounded. But when he arrived, he saw his principal comforting his grandfather, who was trying not to cry. His eyes were red and he looked so sad, he'd never forget it.

"Kasiah. Listen to me son, your little sister passed away this afternoon," was what his grandfather told him when they got in the car. He recalled nothing for a few minutes—as his grandfather told him, he was completely silent and fainted after receiving the news.

Once he got to the hospital, he ran. He knew where Marlei's room was, he'd been there enough times, and once he got there he bursted in to see his dad holding her and sobbing. His grandmother stood by him, wiping away her own tears and he was frozen to his spot until his dad looked up at him.

"M-Marlei?" was what he said, and it seemed everyone around him cried even more at that. "Daddy sh-she—" he couldn't even finish before he started crying himself. He walked over to his dad, to see her and she looked so peaceful.

Marlei was sickly—she never really slept well or ate well but everyone was hoping she'd pull through. She cried a lot, she was fussy and now, she looked so at peace and to this day Kasiah knew that was the only reason he didn't have a fit in that hospital room, she wasn't hurting anymore and even at such a young age it brought him some semblance of comfort.

But after, Siah wasn't okay. He never got to say goodbye to his sister, he didn't get to let her hear that he loved her with his whole heart before she too was taken away from him, and it haunted him for years on end. Even now when he visited her tombstone he felt the urge to apologize for not saying goodbye.

So, today, Siah was feeling particularly heavy as all the dates passed by. It was over now—it seemed like this stretch of months was a year long. He tried to act normal as if nothing was going on with him at all, and so his feet dragged a bit more by the time it was over.

"I miss you," he mumbled to the picture of his mom. He had many pictures of Savannah, but his favorite one was of the two of them. He was about two years old in the picture. She was pointing at the camera and smiling, but baby Siah was just looking up at his mom, like she was the sun, moon and stars. His dad told him he always stared at her like that when he was a baby.

He sighed, rubbing his thumb over the picture and then headed to the bathroom to get washed up for the day.

"Hope you been doing aight without me, old man," Siah teased, and his dad chuckled over the phone. Later on, he wasn't really feeling better, but he was settled. He called his dad to make sure he'd been okay too.

He and his dad were similar in many ways—the day they dealt with these few months was one of them. Unless someone asked, they didn't talk about it. Sometimes it still hurt like it was fresh—and they both had grieved in private for years.

"I certainly have," he joked right back. "How you been?" he asked seriously.

"Well, today was hard. All last week was kinda hard," he nodded. "I wish they were buried here," he sighed.

"Me too," Tatum agreed. "When we go back next week we gotta be sure to bring extra flowers," he smiled slightly, and Siah felt the same.

They talked for a little while longer before Tatum had to get back to work, and Siah got up to finally eat something. He then realized he should probably go grocery shopping—but not today. He wanted to have a proper day off before he was running around taking care of house things.

He made heated up some leftovers from some food he'd bought the night before and sat on his couch, playstation on so he could watch something.

While he was looking, his phone buzzed and he saw a preview of the notification, from Sadé, and he smiled slightly, seeing what she'd said.

Despite the way he was feeling, she just warmed his heart. He could always count on her to do that, especially on days where this feeling hit the hardest and he didn't speak on it. She just seemed to notice that he was off, and made him feel better in a way only she could. He felt blessed.

Instead of texting her back, he decided he'd call her.

"Helloooo," Kash sang, and he smiled a bit to himself hearing her voice.

"Hey baby," he said. "Thank you for that, I needed that," he said honestly.

"Of course! Anytime baby," she grinned. "How's your day off been? You been relaxing? I hope so,"

"Mhm, I just ate, I'm finna lay my ass down. How's work and allat?" he asked, turning his tv down. "You ate lunch, Sadé?" he raised his eyebrows.

"Good! But work is okay, we're super busy today so I haven't gotten the chance to eat yet—but! I'm going on break in twenty ish minutes. Is that acceptable sir?" she chuckled, knowing he was about to fuss her out.

"I guess. Call me when you leave, I miss you," he said and her eyes lit up like a Christmas tree. He thought it was so cute how easy it was to excite her and make her smile, keeping Kash happy was as simple as telling her she looked pretty even if she said it herself twenty times already.

Of course she loved gifts too, but something about affection and love made her much more warm and satisfied than a gift.

She wouldn't say no to a gift, though.

"You do? I miss you too!" she grinned. "Okay, Ima call you back soon, Papa. I gotta finish, okay? I love you,"

"I love you," he replied and they ended the call. He sighed when she was gone, wishing she was with him now. They usually spent entire weekends together because he'd pick her up, but he was extremely tempted to apply for another parking pass so he could have her during the week too.

He was about to put his phone back down when his dad texted him a picture of him holding Marlei a week after she was born—and he smiled. He was sad, but he smiled. Siah desperately wished he could see her grow up, and become as beautiful as their mother.

"My lil angel," he sighed. "I hope you up there with mama living it up, you deserve it. Both of y'all do," he said. "I miss you too,"

The next day, Siah was still being extremely lazy and had yet to go grocery shopping and it was coming up on 1 in the afternoon. He had literally done nothing but shower.

"Man,"he huffed, getting up to put some clothes on. Once he was fully ready he grabbed his keys and jogged downstairs.

He was feeling a little better today, still slightly down but nothing he couldn't handle. And on top of that, he missed his girlfriend, so he had a twinge of attitude. It was only 12:30, so he knew he couldn't see her for another 5 hours.

Just then, his phone rang, and he saw her name pop up on the screen. He figured she was probably on her lunch break, so he picked up, only to see the headboard to her bed. "Hello?"

"Hi! Guess who got off early?" she said, sticking her tongue out and doing a dance, making him laugh. "And still gets paid for the whole day!"

"For real? I need to work at yo job," he chuckled, and an idea popped into his head. "You dressed still?"

"I just changed, why?"

"I'm finna come get you, you wanna go grocery shopping wit' me?" he asked and she nodded eagerly. "Aight, Ima be there in like five, I'm at your exit," he chuckled at the coincidence.

"Okay! Should I bring clothes for the weekend?" she wondered and he nodded. "Okay, Ima hurry up. Bye baby,"

"See you in a second," he said.

Once he got to her house, his leg bounced as he waited for her. He was trying to be patient but he hadn't seen her in literally five days, he was aching to do so. He decided to get out and wait for her, so that when she came he could take her bags for her.

"Hey baby!" he heard and his head shot up to see Sadé walking out the door in a white nike sweatsuit and some 1's he didn't know she had. She had a crossbody bag on but of course her luggage dragged behind her.

He walked up to help her with her stuff and as soon as he got it in the car and closed his door, his arms were around her, squeezing her in a tight hug.

"Hello to you too," she giggled, still in his embrace, so her voice muffled.

"Hey," he breathed out once he finally pulled back, and she stood on her toes to give him a kiss. "Don't crease them shoes na'," he chuckled and she laughed. "I missed you man,"

"Aw baby," she cooed, reaching her hand up to take something off his face. He couldn't even complain this time because she hadn't been with him to do it in a while. "I'm sorry, I just been so busy, you know?"

"You don't have to apologize for working, I work, I understand. I just...been wanting to see you," he said and she smiled, poking her lips out for a kiss which he happily gave. "Aight, come on, before we don't go nowhere," he chuckled and she laughed, going to get in the door he opened for her.

As they drove, she told him about her day, and he about his—although he hadn't done much all day but wash up.

Once they got the store, they got a cart and headed inside, Siah staying close behind Kash. She wanted to push it, for whatever reason and he let her.

"Kasiah, you never eat breakfast! At least get cereal," she fussed.

"Sadé," he chuckled. "What cereal? I'on even drink milk like that you know I'm lactose real bad," he said as they approached the cereal in the aisle.

"Get almond milk," she suggested and he gagged. "Baby, you've never had almond milk. It's good! Especially the vanilla one, Ima get it for you, I'll pay for it so if you don't like it then you wouldn't have wasted money,"

"I'a try it," he nodded and she smiled with a nod, watching him pick his cereal. They continued around the store and Kash couldn't help but notice he was standing very close behind her, like she'd get lost if he didn't. "You look cute, baby," he said randomly.

"Aw! Thank you!" she turned around and saw his phone. "Are you recording me, Kasiah?"

"Mhm, say hi," he nodded and she waved to the camera with a smile before turning around.

They were in the snack aisle now, and Siah got what he wanted, so he was just following Kash around. "Ooh baby, these look good. Can we get these?" she turned to him and his eyebrows were raised.

"Why you asking? I tell you no?"

"Yes!" she laughed. "You do, but you always end up doing it anyway," she said.

"Exactly, go head put em in there," he pointed at the cart and she nodded, grabbing an extra box. "I ain' say get two,"

"You implied it," she pointed and he shook his head.

Once they were back at his apartment and had the groceries put up, Siah asked to lay down, which wasn't unusual, but he was being very clingy today, when it was usually her that was clinging to him all hours of the day.

He lay on top of her, hand in her shirt, as usual. He even asked her to rub his head, which she gladly did of course. "You're so touchy today," she chuckled, using her free hand to toy with his earlobe.

"I missed you," he said simply and she smiled again, but in the back of her mind she wanted to ask him a question.

"A-are you okay?" she wondered.

"Mhm. I can't miss you now?" he wondered.

"Of course you can, but Siah you know as well as me that you're not the most vocal when it comes to that and usually I am the overtly affectionate one. You're acting like me," she teased and he smirked. "It's just...you seem like you're coping,"

He sat still for a moment, wondering how he just got read like a book in under two minutes. He contemplated keeping up the lie, but he knew that was stupid. She was here for him, she had him in a comfortable enough position to share things about himself—even the sad things he rarely spoke about.

"Well um," he began. "My mama's birthday, the day she died, my sisters birthday and the day she died all passed from December to last week, I just...been missing them. Kinda dealing wit' it, and now that it's over it's like I'm recovering from it all at once,"

"Kasiah..." Kash gasped softly. "I'm sorry, baby. Why didn't you say anything?" she asked, her voice dripping in concern.

He shrugged. "I'on talk about it. Me or my dad—we grieve in  silence. I rather talk about the good stuff and let the sadness pass," he explained. Sadé didn't know what to say, he masked his pain perfectly, she would have never ever guessed this.

"You don't have to, Papa. I'm here, me and your friends, you guys don't have to do this alone," she told him sadly. She honestly felt terrible that she missed so many important days in his life, and consecutively. "We're here for you, you know that," she said.

"I know you are, that's why I was so pressed for you to come over here. I need you right now," he said. He was honestly feeling very vulnerable and the fact that she was here for that was enough for him.

"Well...you wanna talk about it?" she asked. "It's okay if you don't, but if you do, I'm listening," she assured him.

After a minute or two of silence and Kash rubbing his head comfortingly, he just nodded his head.

"My um...my sister was only a month old when she died. I never got to tell her goodbye and it depressed me for a long time. I got to-to hold my mama's hand when she was dying and-and the doctor told me it's possible the last thing she heard was me saying that I'd always always always love her. Marlei didn't—she didn't know, she didn't hear," he choked out and Sadé's eyes started to water involuntarily.

"I didn't even wanna go to school that day. I had a test in Science class, so I couldn't miss it and every day I wish I did it just so I could tell my sister I loved her one more time,"

"I'm positive she knew, and that she still knows. She loves you just as much and that's why you're so blessed. You got two angels looking after you every step of your day, and they love you so much," she sniffed. "They're so proud of you," she said, never stopping her hand from moving.

"You think so?" he asked. He wasn't crying, she knew, but his voice was so filled with emotion it made her heart ache.

"I know so, Papa. Look at you! I know you're everything Ms. Savannah prayed for and even more than that. You make her and Marlei so proud, and your daddy," she told him, and she could feel him smile against her.

"A-and you?"

"Of course!" she smiled, tilting his head up, the tears still in her eyes. "You make me proud every single day, Kasiah. I love you," she assured him, and she could have sworn she saw him start to tear up too.

"I love you," he mumbled. "Thank you,"

"Of course. I meant what I said yesterday," she poked his cheek and he just smiled with a nod. "Tell me some more about your mom, baby," she requested, and he perked up again.

"Well...when I was younger, she used to sing a lot. She wasn't particularly great at it," he chuckled and she smiled. "She loved Stevie Wonder, always had that man music playing in the house—especially 'Overjoyed' and 'As'. Oh God, 'My Cherie Amour' too. I could sing them songs backwards in my sleep,"

"Oh my girl had good taste. My mom loves him too," she giggled. "I always said I was gonna dance to Ribbon in the Sky at my wedding," she said.

"You for real?" he raised his eyebrows, and she nodded. "Me too," he chuckled, and her smile turned to a huge grin.

"So we gotta dedicate our first dance to our moms, then," she nodded and it seemed as if—looking into his eyes, you could see Siah fall in love with Sadé all over again. "Okay, so what about her family?"

"Aw man, she was a spoiled brat. Baby of the family, just like you," he said. "My dad said she wasn't hard to please but she hated when he told her no. She hated it so much, she even