"Aryn Sincere. Why are you making life hard for that man?" Sadé asked sternly after Davon and Kasiah left the house. They went to go pick up some food since the uber eats delivery fees were far too high.

They were having a movie night, Kash decided to have Aryn and Davon over too, as a kind of double date—and Aryn was not as happy as she thought she'd be. Ever since she'd come home from Louisiana she'd been in a funk. Her grandfather was doing much better now—thankfully, but she wasn't.

"I don't know what you're talking about Sadé—"

"Aht, see there you go lying. What's the matter? Tell me," Kash pushed, knowing this was the only way she'd talk. "Aryn I'm serious,"

"I miss my family!" she finally cracked. "When I was home, I remembered how much I don't get to see my own mama and daddy and it's really getting to me now. I don't wanna move back to Louisiana because I have a life here now—I have so many good opportunities here. But I just—I can't walk to my cousin's house whenever I'm bored, I can't eat my mama food when I'm hungry and the shit sucks. I feel like a part of me is missing all the time, it's frustrating!" she explained and Kash's heart went out to her.

Aryn grew up in a big southern family—as did Kash. But Kash was constantly surrounded by her family and she couldn't imagine how it'd feel not being around any of them at all.

"I'm sorry, Bug. You don't just wanna fly back? Maybe stay for a little while?" she suggested, letting Aryn lean on her shoulder.

"I don't have enough vacation time yet," she sighed, looking like she wanted to cry. "I been trying to get around it but I just can't and my mama and them money tight because of Paw's surgery and my Maw's medication. It's so annoying, and now Von's probably pissed and me—I hate it here," she sighed loudly.

Aryn also did not deal well with negative emotions. She'd rather take time to herself to sort out her feelings or whatever else was bothering her and return when she was feeling better but she'd been in a relationship for close to four months now and doing that was irrational, and unfair to her partner who was confused as to why she'd been so withdrawn.

"Well, if I can do anything at all to help please let me know. I know you miss them babe," Kash said. She wasn't going to say she'd pay for anything because she knew her best friend would shut that down quick. But this sounded vague—which worked. "And I don't think he's pissed at you, baby. I think he just wants to know what's wrong with his girlfriend. You need to talk to him," Kash said.

"I know," she sighed. "Being a girlfriend is hard as hell, you gotta be all considerate of their feelings and shit," she huffed and Kash laughed loudly.

She could see her friend trying—but sometimes old habits were extremely hard to break, but Sadé was happy she was here to help her friend get out of it. For her and Davon's sake.

"It gets easier, pooh," she assured her, patting her shoulder. "We really girlfriends, both of us at the same time,"

"I know! It's usually just you," she chuckled. "But this is cool. Being in a relationship is fun, except when I have to beat Davon's ass for leaving my seat up. Other than that, pretty fun," she nodded and her friend laughed again.

Once the guys came back, Kash saw that Von still looked kind of upset. She gave Aryn a look and stood to her feet, going into the kitchen to fake look for something, but that didn't matter because Siah was still sitting in there.

"Kasiah!" she called and he turned around. "Come help me in here please!"

"Help you? You don't ha—" she cut him off as he was about to out her for not even having anything in her hand with tight lips, telling him to get up silently, and his eyes widened, but he listened, quickly going in with her. "What happened?!" he whispered frantically.

"They need to have a conversation and you sitting in there like nothing is happening," she explained and he sucked his teeth.

"How the hell was I supposed to know that, Sadé?" he asked her.

"You were supposed to just come when I called you!" she countered. "Hardheaded, that's what you are," she poked his chest.

"Man whatever," he chuckled.

Two weeks since that day had passed and Kash just came off of another job interview, sighing, hoping that this one would yield positive results.

She was trying to be patient with herself, she was only 21, and every kept telling her that her life wasn't going to come together overnight, but that didn't mean she didn't want it to. She had a plan and right now the plan was not coming to fruition and it was bothering her.

But, she wouldn't worry about that, at least right now. Right now, she had to go home and change because she had a full day planned after this just to keep her mind busy.

First, she was meeting up with her mom for brunch and to go to her appointment—she had just made 15 weeks, and they were going to try and see if they could tell the sex of the baby today so Kash refused to miss it.

After that, she was going to see Aryn, she called Kash earlier and said she wanted to talk, so of course she'd be there. She hoped she could go see Siah tonight, if he wasn't busy of course.

She was starting to hate ending her days without Kasiah. Whether it be over the phone or in his bed she wanted him near when she fell asleep. She'd be lying if she said she wasn't attached already, hopefully that wasn't a problem.

Speaking of him, she checked her phone as she got in the car, and saw a text from him which made her smile because they usually didn't talk until after he was off or on his lunch break.

siah💘: pack you a bag when you get home, we got plans this weekend
siah💘: and you need a damn oil change sadé, you not slick. bring yo ass up here.
: oop 👀 okay what should i bring? and do i need it like...now or can it wait?
siah💘: now sadé. & idk bring cute shit.

She sucked her teeth at his vague description and the fact that she had to go get her oil changed. She just figured she had better things to do than sit in the shop for an hour—but she'd get to see her man and her brother whom she hadn't seen in about two weeks, which made her sad. She missed Khy a lot.

After she replied again to Siah, she told her mother she'd be at the restaurant soon and she was off.

"My tinka was hungry in there huh? Mommy starving my baby?" Kash cooed, rubbing her mom's stomach as they sat in the waiting room of Bianca's OB and she was eating again.

"Yo' tinka is a tapeworm, the hell. I eat everything I see chile this is not okay! I wasn't this hungry when I was pregnant wit' you, and you was almost ten pounds! This baby gon tear me, lawd," she groaned.

"Mama please," Kash laughed. "You don't know that yet! Just relax and enjoy your cheetos," she said. She was tempted to swipe one, but she definitely knew better. Soon, her husband arrived and they were just waiting on Bianca's name to be called.

Once she was called, Kash held her hand the whole way back like a child because she was so excited to see the baby. She was used to being the youngest, so the idea of her having someone to take care of and maybe even someone that could look up to her made her happy.

"Okay mom let's take a look," the ultrasound technician said, rubbing around on Bianca's stomach. "Oh! There's baby!" she said and Kash gasped softly.

She had never actually been to one of these before, she was amazed at how clearly she could see the fetus. A few seconds later, the heartbeat sounded and Kash was in love. "Oh my goodness look! Hi baby," she spoke, and her mom smiled at her. "Oop they got yo' big head," she joked with her stepdad and he laughed.

"That's yo' big head," he teased her back as the technician started to look for the gender.

"Oh—looks like we see what's in there baking. Do y'all wanna kn—"

"Yes!" they all responded and the technician laughed.

"Alrighty, if y'all can see right there," she maneuvered around Bianca's stomach and took pictures. "We have a baby girl!"

"Are you serious?! Oh my goodness a baby sister," Kash cooed. She could see the happiness in her mom and stepfather's eyes as they held hands staring at their daughter on the screen. "Not them being cute hold on lemme take a picture," she quickly pulled her phone out to text her brother the photo.

: we're having a baby sister 🥺💓
prince🖤: oh shit fr? we finna get a brat jr ik my dad happy as hell
: lmao ion like you but yeah he isssss. we waiting on you now 👀
Prince🖤: we know Monday

She grinned at his response, happy at the news. She couldn't wait to but baby gifts and bond with her sister and niece or nephew.

"Hey lovebug," Kash grinned, entering her best friends apartment.

"Hey boo," she replied, kissing Kash's cheek. "Don't you look cute,"

"Oh thank you! I was at brunch with my mama before her appointment. Is everything okay? You said you wanted to talk," she asked, kicking her shoes off and sitting on the couch.

Aryn nodded, offering Kash a bottle of water before going to get it from the kitchen and grabbing a seat next to her.

"Okay. So...I just wanted to tell you," she prefaced, and Kash unintentionally leaned in like she was about to learn a secret. "I-I told Davon I loved him,"

Kash's jaw dropped, and she immediately threw herself back on the couch squealing, making Aryn shake her head at the sheer dramatics.

"You did?! Oh my gosh Aryn! When?!" she wondered.

"Last night, I—he's so...lemme just tell the story chile. So, you remember when I was really homesick and sad and almost crying?" she asked and Kash nodded. "Well I took your advice and we talked that night and girl, I cried like a bitch. He just listened and he was so understanding and stuff and we talked about how I need to start letting him in and everything," she explained and Sadé cooed.

"I'm glad it worked out, sis," she smiled.

"Me too. But that's not the good part. So last night I'm showing him my family pictures, baby pictures and all and then my mama calls and so I'm talking to her and she said 'we'll see you soon' and I'm like, huh? Girl when? And she said next weekend bitch—he flew all of them out, mama, daddy and my brothers and sisters,"

"What?! Are you se—wow," she said, completely shocked. Aryn had two sisters and two brothers—so six plane tickets couldn't have been cheap at all. She knew he had a really good job—but she didn't know it was that good.

"Yes. And he paid for their hotel for four days, when I tell you I damn near cried again? And he was just so regular about it like he didn't drop a bag on my family! So then later on that night I'm like why did you do that? I mean I appreciate it of course and I'm so happy but why? And he said 'because I love you Aryn. I wanna see you happy and Ima do what I gotta do to make sure you happy' and I—girl," she chuckled.

"Oh you're nasty," Sadé bursted into laughter.

"But I said it back like eighteen times, chile. And after, you know to make it official," she giggled. "I'm really happy. This was so unexpected, this whole relationship. But I'm glad you bullied me into giving him a chance because I honestly needed him," she sighed happily.

"That is so sweet, Aryn. I'm so happy for y'all! This is too precious my baby is love! Real love, like wow," she placed her hand against her chest dramatically. "So when's the wedding,"

"Okay, Ms. Girl, please relax," she chuckled. "We haven't even moved in together yet and here you go with the drama,"

"You know I can't help mys—" she started to speak before they both heard a loud call from the hallway.

"Baby! Pass me my towel, please!" Kash heard Davon's voice.

"We haven't moved in together, she says. You might as well have!" she teased and Aryn flipped her middle finger at her as she got up to go get Davon's towel.

Kash was genuinely happy for Aryn. She was aglow with the happiness she was feeling, especially now. You could see it, it was evident even in her smile.

"So! What about you?" Aryn said, plopping back down on the couch while Kash sipped her water.

"Me? What about me?" Kash furrowed her eyebrows.

"You dropped the 'L' word on Siah yet?" she wondered and her face remained confused. "Girl stop playin'," she straight faced Kash.

"Me? You said love?" she blinked and Aryn could see the cogs in her head turning ever so slowly.

"Yes, love him! Where is yo' head at girl?" she replied. "What you don't? And don't lie, I know you," she said.

Kash had thought about it, of course. Every single time she saw him the thought crossed her mind, but that's where it stayed, in her mind. She hadn't spoken about it to anyone—not her mother nor Aryn who were usually her go-to's. But she had to admit she was a bit nervous to admit that she might be in love with Kasiah.

He'd shown her different from her last relationship in the short three months that they were together, compared to the two years of she and her ex's relationship but it was still nerve wracking to he put in the same vulnerable position that she was in last time that had her heart shattered into a million pieces that she just got around to taping back together.

"I-I do. I do love him," she nodded.

But despite that, she couldn't deny the way he made her feel, and the way her heart reacted to him. The response from her body and her heart clearly showed her the answer—it was her mind warring against them that was the problem. And unfortunately, when she got like this her mind tended to win.

"And you haven't told him because..." Aryn drew out. "You're scared?"

"I wouldn't say I'm scared—okay yes. But not the way you think," she immediately clarified when Aryn gave her a look. "I-I'm just...okay! I'm scared. But is that so wrong? Can you blame me? I can't just go telling him—shit I can't even think about telling him without that little nagging voice in the back of my head that's telling me not to ever let anyone make me look as stupid as I have before. I'm not at all saying I think Siah would make me look stupid, because I don't. I genuinely do not believe that, but—"

"Sadé, you don't have to explain yourself to me, baby. I understand, one hundred percent. Placing your heart in the hands of someone after having it broken is terrifying. But, remember that Siah is not him. Siah has made you feel everything he couldn't in a matter of weeks. If you love him, tell him. Don't hold back because of other people's mistakes—don't punish Kasiah for something he hasn't done," Aryn said.

"Why do you always have to make so much damn sense?" Kash huffed. She knew Aryn was right—she knew it before Aryn even said it but it took her saying it to confirm. It wasn't fair to Siah to force herself to hold back on the way she was feeling because she'd had a bad experience before.

While it was true, healing was an ongoing process, one that could go on for a long time, if you decided to get into a relationship with someone during that process—which is completely justifiable and normal, what is not okay is to emotionally neglect your partner in the name of self preservation and Sadé knew it. She knew and she needed to start acting like it.

"It's that psych class I took. I remember things," she tapped the side of her head and Kash laughed—because they took that class together.

"I'm here!" Kash called as she locked her jeep, walking into the garage. "Bubs!" she exclaimed with a huge grin.

"Hey Fat fat!" he cheesed. "I missed you kid,"

"I miss you too! You don't visit, I should smack you," she straight faced him, handing him her keys.

"Uh—neither do you, you bum,"

"You have a girlfriend! Y'all could just be naked, doing naked people things and here I come knocking. Think, Khy," she said in a duh tone and he laughed hard.

"Last time I checked you definitely had a boyfriend, so I'm not understanding," he raised his eyebrows.

"Yes I have a boyfriend, but you would come visit me at my dad's house and me and my boyfriend aren't going to be having sex in my father's house, so bam. I win, you have to come see me more," she shrugged as he fake gagged. "Oh please! You're actually literally disgusting—y'all are the ones who was so loud at nana's that we all—"

"Alright! Damn," he chuckled, covering her mouth with his hand. "Get your girlfriend bro," he said as Siah walked back outside with some water.