Thank you @Fairqytales for the cute photo! I heard there were a lot of Wattpad glitches last week but here's to hoping you got to this chapter ok :)  

Chapter 97: Still Here

It's hard to deny desire. I felt it with every step Luke took towards me. His blue eyes were fixed on me like I was the only person in the room. I wanted us to be.

And to feel his breath on my lips – even though I had so much to say, a kiss has the power to say more.

He could kiss me where it hurts until it doesn't.

Luke reached me and stood in front of me, in the middle of the crowd. I've waited for him. A strong and impulsive boy who turned me into a hopeless romantic. I had almost been ready to trade my values for him.

We all have those frozen parts of ourselves that only melt if we open ourselves fully to someone. I don't think I'm ready. I've experienced heartbreak one too many times to open myself up again so easily. But with patience, I can.

I want him to give me time. In time, I can grow into someone who can openly love and trust. Luke stood opposite me, so close to me, but not touching.

"How do we move past this?" he asked in his deep voice, and the music from the stage was a dramatic accompaniment to his words, "We've been arguing so much."

"I'm tired of it too," I responded, "It's because we're learning about each other and ourselves at the same time. It's difficult."

"We're very different people."

"True. But we've always known that."

The music got louder as the chorus of the rock band on stage started to play. The crowd around us got more active and someone accidentally pushed me. Luke shoved them back and held my waist, while I held onto his muscular arm for support.

Luke was willing to change, but he's also strong willed. He won't trade his values. So I guess we're similar in that sense.

I never would've guessed that watching Luke bully people would be where the line was drawn between us. But that is a line I will always stand by. We live in a vicious world and, in my mind, intimidation is never ok – it's not ok when the athlete does it, when the camp counselors do it, when the ex-best friend, the ex-boyfriend or the adults do it.

If I have to lose the man I love over it, then he isn't the man I thought he was.

**

~Oma's POV, twenty minutes before~

The bar was getting loud as it filled up ahead of the singing competition. It wasn't our usual hangout.

I don't know much about Jake. He showed up this year out of the blue and then rumors started to fly around that he was Luke's brother. Luke never confirmed it.

Turns out, Jake likes to sing. Finally, a guy in this group who isn't an athlete.

I've known Luke for a long time now, and I respect his privacy. He's a fun guy, and there's no denying his dedication to basketball. Everyone has their own affairs and, if he wants to keep certain things private, he should. That's why I didn't like this idea.

"B, I wish you told me we were here for Jake," I said, as we carried our cocktails to a high-top table, "You said we were just going out."

"We are just going out," Bianca answered with a sly smile, "Luke doesn't have a say about where we go or who we see."

Sometimes I think Luke must have powers because he's played a real mind game on my friend. I just hope he wouldn't do the same to Millie.

"Is it necessary to antagonize him?" I replied, "Luke's our friend and this'll make him uncomfortable."

I didn't want to be dragged into the immaturity of these games. Chasing after a guy is not my kind of fun.

"He's a grown boy," Bianca replied, "Maybe even too grown."

I don't know what that means.

Bianca scanned the bar to see if she recognized anyone. I've never been here before, but the retro arcade game machine was calling out to me.

"I feel it in my bones that it's going to be a good night!" Bianca announced, sipping her margarita.

I recognize that twinkle in her eyes: she had her eyes set on Jake.

I mean, he's cute - if you like the Justin Bieber look. But really, Bianca wanted to taunt Luke by dating his brother.

"Lighten up Oma," Bianca insisted, watching my unimpressed reaction, "Even a future chemistry major needs to have some fun."

Her idea of fun only ends up in heartbreak.

"We have different ideas of fun," I murmured, cocktail in one hand and my phone in the other.

Austin had tagged me in a photo on Instagram and I scrolled through his album. I almost choked.

"B," I said, taking her attention away from scouting the venue, "You know how I posted that album from our vacation? The one I spent hours editing and choosing-"

"Obviously," Bianca replied, "I'm getting so much heat for my comment about puppy love that I really know your album."

"Yeah, well I spent ages on it. Meanwhile, Austin posts an album of fish and gets more likes," I said, showing her my phone.

She peered over and scrolled through the seven photos of Austin's aquatic adventure.

All taken when he went scubadiving over new year's. I mean, not a single picture of the group, of any of the sights, of our nights out or moments together. He posted fish.

"He's tagged us," Bianca added, "Do you think we're meant to be the fish?" (album is on my Instagram)

I don't even try to understand Austin's mind.

Bianca scrolled through the comments next and stopped to read Millie's. We both noticed Austin's reply:

MillieRipley: Not a bad album, cod do better
Austinuntaylored: Any fin is possible, don't trout yourself

Their friendship is just...

"Hi girls!" Stacey exclaimed, appearing on the other side of the high-top table.

"What are you doing here?" Bianca asked, handing me back my phone.

I scrolled through the other comments, letting Bianca deal with Stacey. Ever since Stacey tried to sell out Millie to be part of our group, I lost all respect. (Ch. 43, Player Next Door)

Stacey recapped for us, "Remember after I gave you the information on Millie, you agreed to invite me to all social events? Amy lets me know where you're going. She's holding up your side of the bargain."

What a useless bargain.

"I didn't realize Amy was doing that," Bianca said, "Your information was so weak that I'm going to have to rethink our agreement. Unless you can come up with something better."

"Um, well I did hear something recently," she offered up all the gossip she had, "Millie and Luke are arguing and not sleeping together."

"That's barely news," Bianca fake yawned, dismissing her with a flick of her hand.

"It's news if they're about to break up," Stacey insisted, "That's the most likely outcome anyway. What does anyone expect when a nerd dates a jock? It's a nice story, but reality doesn't work like that."

"He's more than a jock," Bianca said, "Don't fall for stereotypes. You want to believe he's dumb because it makes you feel better about yourself. Some people are multi-talented and others are... not."

Harshly put. But Bianca always defends Luke. 

Luke was her first love, and it hurts her to have him as a friend and nothing more. I used to think they were so well suited to each other. They're both smart and manipulative. They're blunt with their words and direct with their actions. They both loved partying, casually dating people to fill their own voids and accepting of each other's vanity.

Bianca's also confident, which I think you need to be to date Luke. He's an attention magnate. He's been with a lot of girls who still talk about him and that's hard to handle.

I think Millie is the version Luke wants to be. She might be naïve, but she has ideals that Luke wishes he could have.

But I don't really know.

"Ohh," Bianca whistled, staring at the two boys who walked through the door, "I did not expect to see them."

Luke Dawson and Austin Taylor headed towards the bar. I never expected them to be here.

Was Luke really here to support Jake? I thought they weren't close. Maybe there isn't bad blood between them after all.

Bianca was already gone, holding her cocktail, and heading straight for Luke.

A magnet will always be a magnet.

I sighed and followed her. I didn't want to be left behind with Stacey the Snitch.

~Millie's POV, ten minutes later~

The music got louder with the chorus of the rock band on stage. The crowd around us got more active and someone accidentally pushed me. Luke shoved them back and held my waist, while I held onto his muscular arm for support.

Something about Luke always makes me feel comfortable in the most uncomfortable of situations. But we were interrupted. The group that had surrounded him by the bar was now coming towards us on the dance floor.

"MILLAY!" Austin called out to me, continuing the fish puns that we started on Instagram, "You're krilling me with those puns!"

I grinned back, trying to come up with something else. "They're ofishally..."

Flip, I got nothing!

I didn't know how to make my response any less awkward, especially since Austin seemed fine to chill in the awkwardness. His pupils were super dilated, and I realized he was high.

Luke was less fine. He stared at his best friend and then at me like I had a tap dancing fly on my face.

"It's an inside joke," I muttered, realizing he hadn't seen Austin's Instagram.

I half waved at the other girls. Stacey and Bianca were already dancing beside us, looking up at the stage. Oma was the only one who waved back.

I turned back to Luke, thinking that maybe we could get out of here for a moment. But his attention was already elsewhere. 

He was focused on the entrance, and at the boy that just walked in. It was the same boy he's been hanging out with at school lately. (Ch. 86)

"Excuse me," he muttered to me, with his eyes barely glancing at me.

I felt the fleeting touch of his hand brush my waist as he walked through the crowd and towards the boy. The boy noticed him almost immediately and met him half-way. They started talking and I wish I knew what was causing such a serious conversation.

I thought we agreed to communicate more, so why was Luke still so mysterious?

"Him again?!" Bianca exclaimed, watching the same scene I was, "That sophomore kid has been trailing Luke all week. They're joined at the hip now."

For once, Bianca and I can relate.

Instead of watching silently though, Bianca wanted answers. She turned to Austin with an expecting look. Austin blinked back.

"I'm going to duck out of this one," Austin said, raising his hand in a peace sign as he disappeared into the crowd, "The bar's calling me!"

"I'm coming with you!" I exclaimed, running after the floating peace sign in the crowd.

**

"So," Austin said, propping his elbows against the crowded bar, "This is a little awkward, Millie."

"Why?" I asked, trying not to smile. I couldn't help it. I found Austin so funny sometimes.

"You and me at the bar," he replied as if he was telling a grand old tale, "It's not been our finest moments."

"Let's get water then," I suggested, not wanting another beer anyway.

I slid onto a bar stool and felt comfortable now that Austin was here. The music had also died down as the rock band headed off the stage and a new act came on. It was nice to be able to speak instead of shout over the music.

Austin called out to the bartender for two glasses of water.

"And make it on the rocks," Austin added, leaning over the bar table to pluck an olive out of the open jar.

"So you want water with ice?" the bartender confirmed the odd request, watching him steal an olive.

"Correct," Austin nodded, chewing on his olive.

The mic on stage made a screeching sound. Then we heard someone tap it and say:

"Can you hear me ok?"

I spun round on the bar stool and stared at Jake on stage. He had the guitar strap strung over his shoulder. One arm was holding the neck of the guitar and his other hand was wrapped around the mic, tattoos on display.

He had a cute, nervous look which was winning the crowd over. Jake had a stage presence, that's for sure.

"I won't waste any time," Jake spoke softly into the mic, "But I wrote this song a couple days ago. It's inspired by a friend who's gone through a lot, but always shows up with a smile on her face. She's taught me to do the same. It's called Still Here."

A slurping sound next to me was distracting. I turned to Austin who raised his eyebrows at me and stopped slurping his water so loudly.

I was scared of what was about to happen. The last time Jake sang, it didn't end up well for our friendship or my relationship with Luke.

Slowly, Jake started to strum his guitar, reminding us all how incredibly natural he is with it. It's hard to think he only bought the instrument today. And then he started to sing.

And it took my breath away.

Coming home but I don't want you here,
All you do is bring back the fear,
Forced into your world,
Thought it's already starting to tear.

There's a pain in my soul as I break from a whole,
And lose control of the mind that they stole:
I'm still here.

Living in the fear but I'm still here.

It could've been different, but different doesn't mean better
She made a mistake, but I stood by and let her
Took my heart and gave it to the weather
If only she knew how much of her I treasure.

There's a pain in my soul as I break from a whole,
And lose control of the mind that they stole:
I'm still here.

Living in the fear but I'm still here.

When you're eighteen but you don't know what your dream is,
When you're broken but you get broken again,
Watch those parts get turned into art,
And they give medication to make the healing start.

Living in the fear but I'm still here.
Wishing I had a life to steer, but I'm still here.

Here.

Jake's eyes were closed as he sang his last words into the mic and his eyebrows were furrowed in a frown as he let his emotions pour out of him. His fingers slowly pulled away from the guitar and the last of the song faded. 

He opened his brown eyes and stared into the crowd, waiting for a reaction.

A/N: That's a show! What do you think their reaction will be? And what did you think of Jake's song?

Thank you @bittersweet0660 for the tiktok video! To anyone making a tiktok of the PND series, tag me so I can share your creativity  :)

Here's some of the genius Jake lyrics you came up with:

I'll post again next week. And anyone in Ibadan, Nigeria this weekend? One of our super talented PNM readers, Stephanie (@__bamiie), is dancing at the got voice oyo competition. Stephanie, you got this! 

<3 See ya next week!