nathan dawson's pov:

I skipped school the next day. My head was throbbing from all the crying and my eyes were so puffy I resembled an alien, so mom agreed to let me stay home. Maybe that was an attempt to make up for not seeing the possibility of me having dyslexia, but it wasn't like I was actually angry at her. 

I was still glad I didn't have to go to school, where everyone would have been on my face asking me what was wrong. I wasn't ready to come out of the closet with the learning disability thing yet, just like I wasn't ready to shout to the world that I was into guys. And girls and everything in between I guess. 

I think the correct word, in my case, would be pansexuality. I Googled it once, not long ago, and it sounded the most fitting. But honestly, I don't know. It all sounded so confusing to me, and I rather just thought I was me. If I liked someone, it just meant I liked that person.

And there I was, thinking about Solar again. I was laying on my bed, staring at the ceiling. My phone was on the bed next to me and I was pondering whether to text Solar. He was at school, probably at class, so I knew I shouldn't. But frankly I missed him, and I missed him a lot. Solar solved the dilemma by texting me first. I almost dropped the phone on my face when I rushed to read it.

Solar: Are you OK? 

Solar: Nicholas told me you have a headache, but I got a feeling he was leaving out something. 

Solar: Sorry, if I'm being nosy. Just worried.

nathan: nosy is good :) i told mom and jeffrey about the dyslexia thing and i think mom's trying to make up for it. but my head hurts for real tho.

Solar: You told them?

Solar: That's good! I'm so proud of you.

Solar: How did it go?

nathan: good, i think. turns out my parents are pretty amazing. 

Solar: You have to tell me all about it tomorrow. If you're coming to school?

Solar: You better come, it's so boring here without you. 

Solar: I miss you.

When I read the last text, my heart skipped a beat and a face-splitting smile spread on my lips. I was glad he wasn't here to see it. How could he say things like that so easily, when all I could do was think about them?

nathan: yeah, i'll come tomorrow. 

nathan: miss you too.

Then I quickly put the phone away, pressing my eyes shut. My heart was still fluttering and my cheeks burning, making me realize how screwed I was. I was crazy about Solar, and I was starting to have a hint of hope that he might be a little crazy about me too.

At some point I must have fallen asleep, because the next time I opened my eyes, mom was nudging my shoulder. I could hear someone using a faucet in the kitchen and my stomach grumbled when the aroma of food filled my nose.

"Hey, honey. Does your head still hurt?" Mom asked in a soft voice, sitting down on the edge of my bed. Her brown hair was on a loose ponytail and her eyes held certain sadness when she looked at me.

"Not really." I smiled, sitting up. I was still drowsy, so I yawned and rubbed my eyes.

"I booked you an appointment with a speech-language pathologist. I made sure he'll take every possible test this time." Mom leaned closer and ruffled my hair. "I'm so sorry we have let this go on for so long. I'm your mom, I should have seen it. There was just so much going on with.."

"Dad and Jonathan, I know." I finished the sentence for her, when it started to seem like she wasn't going to do so. "And it's okay. I don't blame you or anything."

"That's good, but I'll probably keep apologizing for a while. You know how I am." Mom's eyes brimmed with tears and he let out a teary chuckle. 

"Please don't cry, mom." I pleaded. "Or I'm going to start crying again, and then I'll have to skip school tomorrow as well."

"One day off is more than enough."

°°°°

A while later, when everyone was done eating, but not yet gotten up from the table, the doorbell rang. We changed looks, non verbally informing each other that we weren't expecting company. When I thought about the possibility of Solar making a surprise visit, I truly grasped what it meant to have butterflies in your stomach.

"I-I'll get it." I shot up, almost knocking over my chair in the process and hurried to the door. Then, when I opened the door, I could barely hide my disappointment.

It wasn't Solar, but a red haired girl, whose face was covered with freckles, a boy wearing a green oversized sweater and an orange cap and a small brown dog on a leash. The dog barked at me and wagged his tail happily, and I couldn't help but smile. 

"Hi, I'm Rosie." The girl greeted me with a toothy grin and then leaned down to pet the dog. "This is Captain." And then she gestured towards the boy: "And that's Eldrick. Is Jonathan home?"

"Jonathan, your friends are asking if you're home." In just a second or two I could hear his footsteps thudding towards the door.

I took a step backward, beaming at the sight of Jonathan and his friends talking. Jonathan adored animals, especially dogs. He crouched down and let Captain lick his face. The boy, Eldrick made a fake gagging sound at that, but then they just bursted out laughing and Jonathan was over the moon. When they left to take Captain for a walk, I felt like things were coming together just fine.

°°°°

I was back laying on my bed, staring at the ceiling, when my phone started ringing. My heart did funny things when I read the name of the caller from the screen. I wasn't big on talking on the phone, but I was ready to make an exception just to hear Solar's voice. 

"H-hi." It came out like a squeak, so I cleared my throat and tried again. 

"Hi." I could hear from his voice that he was smiling, which made my heart flutter even faster. As I said, I was screwed. I just didn't know I was this screwed.

It was quiet for a while, and then Solar spoke again: "I could have asked you this tomorrow, but I.. Well, I have no other explanation than that I wanted to hear your voice." He chuckled nervously. "Anyway, I just wanted to check if you'd want to come to pick up this old cabinet with me, Kieran and Choni on Saturday."

"A cabinet?" I repeated, making sure I had heard right. When Solar made a sound that sounded pretty much like yes, I added: "You know, I'm not very strong."

"I don't need muscles, I need company." Solar laughed warmly. 

"Good, because if you n-needed a mover, Nicholas would be better equipped for that." I pointed out.

"But he's not very good company, is he?" Solar joked, earning a chuckle from me. "I need you to save me from being the third wheel. That's not something you'd want to be with Kieran and Choni, believe me."

"How long will it take?" I asked, although I had already decided to go, just to get to spend more time with Solar.

"Hours. It's going to be a long ride." 

"I can't let you third wheel them for an hours-long car ride, can I?" I liked bantering with him. "Sure, I'll be your hero this time."

"I like the sound of that." After that we talked for almost an hour, and he made me laugh. He made me grin and he made me smile. I was crazy about him, no doubt about that.