"Nahh, cause that shit was stupid as fuck Ramon. Police got involved and now your name all in it. You ready to go to jail for some bullshit? Cause you wanted to act fucking stupid?"

He shook his head as his hands swept across his face. This was probably the first time I had ever saw any type of fear in his face but it quickly wiped off as he responded. "Man, that nigga walking around here all jolly like he ain't try to put a bullet in you. You my nigga yo," he stood up, hands pointing towards me, "I'm not about to let anybody press my mothafuckin' crew and we not do shit about it. That mothafucka needed to know he wasn't just about to walk away freely from that shit."

I shook my head, I understood where he was coming from but he didn't understand how shit worked. "Ramon, you have to be strategic. Look at this shit." I pointed towards the TV that just so happened to be playing the story. "You shot a fucking eighteen year old nearly to death. You clearly saw you wasn't hitting that nigga and kept going."

He threw his hands up, "man I'm not bout to hear this shit from you." I could tell it was lowkey bothering him, surprisingly. "I'm not trying to make you feel bad Ramon, but it's reality."

"That nigga a pussy, like who does shit like that? Pull somebody in front of you? He pussy. That's reality."

I nodded my head, "you right and at the end of the day that shit is going to come back around on him. But I ain't worried about him, I'm on your ass. You need to lay low and don't do a mothafuckin' thing without my okay or you can kiss all this shit goodbye."

He looked at me, his eyebrows brought in "you threatening me?" I shook my head no, "I'm promising you. You just opened up a whole new can of worms that we have to all deal with now."

He shook his head, "Imma head out." I nodded my head, "Yeah, do that. Keep your head up though don't let this overtake you. We'll get through, stay low." As mad as he made me with this he was still one of mines and the last thing I wanted him to do was let this situation consume him.

He threw a finger up signifying that he heard me as he continued walking towards the door.

I picked up my phone seeing I had a message from Johanna asking if she could head this way in thirty minutes. I sent her a quick yeah as I looked around. Deciding I needed to do a little cleaning up. I couldn't believe I agreed to the shit, but part of me felt bad seeing as how one of my boys was the cause of it.

As soon as I finished a knock came through on my door. I picked up my phone seeing she had sent me a text about fifteen minutes ago saying she was on her way. I made my way to the door surprised by who actually stood on the other side.

"Surprised mothafucka?" Roberto asked with a smile as he pushed his way inside. I rolled my eyes as I closed the door. This was the worst timing.

"Why are you here?" A look of offense crossed his face, "whoaaa. Rude now aren't you? Since when is it not okay for me to drop by?"

"It's never okay, you always just do it. But it's not okay tonight. So go."

A smirk crossed his face, "oh I see. You got company coming over."

"Yeah, so go." I emphasized. There was no way he could see who was coming over. I knew he was the least judgmental but too much shit was up in the air right now.

He nodded his head as he looked towards the door when a knock came through. I shook my head as he headed towards the door with a smile on his face. "I'm leaving." He was eating this shit up, I was never open about who I was dealing with so him about to see whoever it was in the flesh brought some joy to him.

I stood back with my hands in my pockets. Jaw tightened. Wasn't in the mood for this right now. But I'd correct him later on what the situation actually was. He opened the door wide, from where I was standing I could see her, a look of surprise on her face as she stood there with a bag in her hand. She quickly recovered her face giving him a small smile saying hey.

Roberto turned around looking at me as he licked his lips and smiled. "I see," he said before turning back around, speaking to her and making his way out.

She stepped in. "Sorry," she started. "Didn't know he was here and I know -"

"It's not your fault," I cut her off. It was what it was now.

She nodded her head as she stood there awkwardly causing me to chuckle. "You can sit your bag down, get comfortable."

She did as I said as she took a seat on the couch. "You can sleep in my room, I just changed the sheets and everything. I'll sleep out here."

She shook her head, "no, you'll sleep with me." I smiled, "I'm fine with that too but I'm about to go shower, remote's right there." I pointed towards it. "You know where my room is, if you don't remember it's easy to find." She gave a smile and then turned around and turned the channel on the TV.

I took the longest shower as I felt like it was needed. I got out peaking into my room seeing that she wasn't in there, taking the opportunity to go ahead and change in there. I quickly changed into some more comfortable clothes then headed back out to the living room. She was sprawled out on one of the couches playing an episode of Love and Hip Hop. I shook my head upon seeing it as she looked up at me with a smile on her face, "don't do that. This is quality reality TV."

I snorted, "this is trash TV. All this shit is set up."

She looked at me like I was crazy, "no it's not. This is real."

I laughed, "If that's what helps you sleep better at night, I'm going to let you think that."

She shook her head as her eyes stayed glued to me. I tried to ignore it as I scrolled through my phone. I looked over at her as she didn't even try to fake like she wasn't staring. "What?" I asked, my full attention on her at this point.

"Was that girl here your girl? Like are you talking to her?"

I chuckled as I went back to scrolling on my phone, "Johanna what's up with you?" I ignored her question altogether.

"What you mean?" she asked as she leaned up, positioning herself to face me.

"Like why does that matter? What's going on in your head."

She looked like she was thinking as she brought her lip in biting it, it seemed to be a nervous habit of hers. "Jose I think it's clear I'm feeling you. Why the fuck else would it matter?"

I nodded in understanding, "no Johanna. I'm not talking to her." That response seemed to make her happy. "Where's your head at though?" She questioned, "I don't want to get ahead of myself."

I was surprised by her response. "Ahead of yourself in what way?"

She looked up at me, slight attitude on her face. "Jose, seriously?" I honestly didn't know what she meant, I needed shit straightforward. "Yeah."

"With this," she pointed between us. I sighed, I was feeling Johanna, that was without a doubt but this shit with us could only go so far realistically. "I'm feeling you too Jo. I won't lie. But in the same instance, me and you trying to make anything happen with everything going on would be stupid as fuck. Like everything would have to be secretive as fuck and even then there's chances of shit getting out. Shit look at today alone, you came through when my boy was leaving, which wasn't your fault cause he just popped up. But shit like that puts too much into question."

"If you don't want to deal with me you can just say that, you don't have to fake reasons." She responded. It was like she wanted to ignore the facts.

I sighed, "I'm not faking reasons Jo."

"Jose you're secretive as fuck with your relationships anyways, so what you're saying, nevermind." She shook her head, waving it off.

I shook my head, "you right. But with that shit, it's okay if shit get out about it cause there won't be no negative repercussions. I ain't got to explain shit to nobody. But with you, it's another situation Jo. You're black, our sides are feuding. Your brother is my worst enemy, that's a lot of shit that'll affect our relationship. Period, point, blank."

"In other words you care what people think, got it."

"And you don't?" I demanded. "How many of your friends know we fucked?"

She got silent. "Exactly, you care too."

"But I don't." She yelled back.

"Then why don't your friends know? Be real. Y'all females love to dish, why don't your best friend know? The person who should know it all."

She tucked a hair behind her ear. "Because she would judge me, with everything going on with our sides." She whispered as if she realized my point.

"Exactly Jo. We can like each other all we want yo. Shit, we can fuck. I'm with it. But with all this shit going on, it ain't some shit either of us want to answer to or hear somebody bitch about."

"But so what Jose, they bitch about it then what? That's it. That's the end of it."

I shook my head, "it's not though Johanna. It's not. It's people you love that I want to fucking kill. Like you don't get this shit. Hearing people's mouth about it is just one part, but get to the deeper end of shit. Your brother killing my folks and we killing theirs. Like do you realize the reason you're at my house now? Cause my people were trying to pop your brother. And what's going to be the end result for us? You hating me cause I shot your brother? Ain't no good shit gon' come out of this. We got feelings for each other that shouldn't exist. Like we shouldn't even be having this conversation. This shit stupid."

I stood up, blown as I headed towards the kitchen grabbing a beer. She sat there not moving as she looked up towards the TV as the show was going off. I shook my head, as I took a couple drinks from my beer.

She stood up as a commercial came on turning to face me, "do you have water?" I nodded my head as I went towards the fridge, grabbing a bottled water as she made her way towards me in the kitchen. She stopped a good foot away from me reaching for the water in my hand, as I reached out giving it to her. She quickly turned back around to head back to the living room, but I quickly reached forward grabbing her by her waist and pulling her into me. I backed up her against the counter as I just looked at her for a second. She looked at me for a quick second before trying to avoid eye contact altogether.

"Jo, I'm not trying to stay I don't want to try this with you." She connected eyes with me, "but you are Jose, that's exactly what you're saying."

I shook my head, "it's not. But we can't ignore the facts! If shit was different I would 110% in." She looked up at me, then chuckled, shaking her head. "I'm going to head to bed now." She looked down at my arms that were keeping her locked between me. I moved one arm, just to bring my hand to her face as I connected our lips. Her body responded positively as our mouths explored each other. I pulled her body closer to mine, as close as I could get her to me. She pulled away as the kiss deepened, looking up at me as if her eyes were trying to read mine. She shook her head as she pushed me back and off of her.

I stepped back from her as I ran my hands down my face. My dick at full attention which she caught sight of. Our eyes connected after her eyes trailed up my body. She turned her head to the side slightly, "so I'm good enough for you to fuck in private, but just not be with?"

I closed my eyes, crossing my arms not wanting to do this shit with her. "Cause it doesn't sound as bad if you're just fucking me right? You get to say you're fucking one of their girls. But since I don't look like Melissa -"

I stopped her right there, "don't do that. Melissa's not my girl. We're not even talking, she's helping me with my sister."

"But it's okay for people to think you two are talking." I shook my head, aggravated by this conversation and how she was trying to flip it. "Johanna we just went through this shit."

She nodded her head before turning to leave the kitchen. "Johanna." I called out.  She stopped, turning to slightly face me. "If I had to choose, with all this bullshit put aside, none of the crazy shit going on, it would be you." And that was honesty, she was who had my attention.

She gave a small smile, "and Jose, with all the bullshit in place, all the crazy shit going on. It is you I choose." She turned back around walking to the living room, grabbing her bag and making her way to my room.

I picked up my beer, finishing it not knowing where exactly this left us, but it couldn't be too far off from where we started.