Chapter 39 || Wait Whattttt?
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* * Nicole's POV * *

I walk through the doors where I used to go almost every week... where I went to learn self-defense...

Really came in handy huh... I thought back on every moment I could have used it, but didn't.

I shook my head trying to erase the memories.

Either way... I think I'm getting better.

I sigh as I sit in an empty chair and plop my bag down on the floor beside me.

I haven't been here in ages.

"Nicole! Welcome back," a very familiar voice cheered as she ran over and pulled me into a hug, "We missed you."

I laugh as I hugged her back, "Missed you too Audrey."

"It's been so long! What's new?" She asks as gestures me to follow her.

"Well..." I say as my voice trails off as I carefully pick my words so that I don't tell her too much that had happened cause if I flat out said I got attacked I would have to say I didn't exactly do anything to stop it... "I have a boyfriend now."

She stops and turns to me, "No way! Seriously!"

I nod my head.

"Name? Photo?" She says in one breath.

"His name is Jake and he is coming to pick me up so you can see him then."

She cheers as we enter an empty room and adds, "Good. I must make sure he is worthy of for you."

I laugh as I think, he is more than worthy.

We enter an empty room with light wood floors with a large spare closet and a long mirror running against the entire wall. It looks like it used to be a dance studio.

"Alright I trust you remember everything but since it's been a while let's just start with a quick review," Audrey says as she gets into a strong stance.

I follow suit and soon enough we were whizzing through the review.

"It's like you haven't missed a day. I'm impressed, you're doing much better," She says with a smile, "Let me see if Milo is ready? We can start some situational stuff."

I nod as I go grab a sip of water.

Audrey leaves for a minute and enters with Milo who is covered in padding.

"Hey, Nicole! Long-time see!" Milo says, "Ya ready?"

"Yup."

He puts his headgear on and Audrey says, "Alright. Nicole stand over there. Let's start with a situation when you're waiting for your ride by the curb. Milo will approach you. Remember he may or may not attack."

I nod as I stand and wait. I got this.

"What's a pretty thing like you doing out here so late?" He asks in a low tone.

"I'm here with my friends," I say being as vague as possible.

"I don't see anyone?" He steps closer.

"They will be here any second," I reply.

He steps closer.

"Don't come any closer," I say firmly.

"Why? I'm not going to hurt you?"

"That's close enough."

He takes another step closer.

"Oh look I see my friend. Gotta go."

He looks over my shoulder, "I don't see anyone."

He steps closer and tries to grab me.

I shout as I press my fingers into where his eyes would be. When he doesn't run away I knee him hard in the spot that would make him crumble to his knees.

When he is on his knees I run away.

Audrey applauds, "Good job."

Milo stands completely unfazed due to the protection he is wearing, "If that was real he'd be talking like a chipmunk."

We all laugh.

"Alright, let's do one more situation before you have to leave," she says as she puts out two chairs in the center of the room. Audrey instructs me to sit in one of them. Milo follows and sits in the other seat.

"This will be a college-like setting. You and a man are the only two in your dorm room. When Milo places his hand on your shoulder that will represent an inappropriate act, it's could be sexual, harmful, or just unwanted touching."

I nod.

"You need to tell him persistently tell him no. If he doesn't quit do not give in and do not be quiet. Loudness is key. If he attacks use your self-defense. This situation is very open with quite a few possibilities. I want you to use your knowledge to get out of the situation and don't worry. I will be right here the whole time. Ready?"

"Yup," I say confidently.

"Alright. Go ahead Milo," Audrey says with a nod as she sits down.

I take a breath as Mil starts to say, "Thanks for inviting me up here. It was getting way to crowded down there."

"Yeah. I needed to get away from the scene." I reply.

"It's good that we get to be all alone now," He says in a low tone that kinda freaked me out even though it was fake.

I quickly think of a response, "My roommate will be back here soon though."

He laughs, "You and I both know your roommate is having way too much fun down there to come see what we are up to."

"What do you mean?" I question.

"You know," He says as he touches my shoulder which was supposed to represent an act of assault.

I shoot right up and take two steps back, "Don't touch me!"

He stands up and blocks the supposedly 'door dorm', "You wanted this. That's why you brought me up here."

"No, it isn't."

"I think it's about time you leave," I say firmly.

"I'm not going anywhere," and take a step towards me.

"Don't come any closer!" I shout.

He shakes his head, "Just get on the bed," he says as he gestures to the chairs which was the 'bed'.

"NO!" I shout and try to make a bolt for the exit but he stops me.

"Get on the f***ing bed!" he makes an attempt to grab me but I easily slip away

All of a sudden, a wave of fear washes over me out of nowhere causing my legs to shake.

Audrey notices this and starts to feed me positivity, "You're doing great Nicole. You've got this."

When I say "No" and "Get away from me" they come out as little hushes that are barely audible.

Milo slowly turns into Liam. My legs give way causing me to collapse to my knees.

Milo immediately stops and the two of them rush to my side. I cover my hands with my face to hide the tears that started to roll down my cheek.

"I can't do this," I say breathlessly.

Audrey puts her hand on my back, "You can do anything, Nicole."

I shake my head and wipe my tears, "No. I couldn't do it. I couldn't..."

"What do you mean?" Milo says as he comforts me.

I fearfully sigh as I begin to cry some more, "Liam... he almost... I couldn't protect myself..."

Audrey wraps her arms around me, "Awe honey."

She soon lets go of me, wipes away my tears, and says, "Self-defense isn't easy. Doing them here and out there are two completely different things. I won't lie and say it's easy because it's not. You are not alone," she paused, "I started teaching because I was abused and assaulted several times. It took me years... and I mean years to defend for myself. I wanted to teach everyone the tactics I learned so this would never happen to anyone else."

She looks me in the eye and continues, "But there is a second part that I don't usually get to teach. Self-defense is not just physical but it is also mental. Your perpetrator may attack you physically but some start to work on you mentally. They do this so you give up, stop fighting and let them win. You need to be both strong mentally and physically and to not let anyone get to you."

"How?" I ask.

"This you must learn on your own. You need to find it within yourself. Find confront your fear, don't run from it," She hugs me again, "Loving yourself is the first step."

She gives me a reassuring smile and I smile back.

"I want to give it another go," I say as I stand back up.

Audrey and Milo reply simultaneously, "Are you sure?"

I nod.

We pick up where we left off, same as the last time except this time I wasn't going to lose.

"Alright go ahead," Audrey gives us a thumbs up to start.

"I said get on the f***ing bed!"

"No!"

"Did I f***ing stutter? Get on the bed now!" He steps closer and I step back.

"Get out of my dorm!" I shout.

"I'm not going anywhere till I get what I want," He says as he advances on me.

"No!" I shout as I strike the part of the helmet representing his eyes.

"You little-" He shouts unfazed and wraps his arms around me so I am unable to leave.

I try to squirm out but it's no use. I take a deep breath and pivot slightly so I can strike him where his 'family jewels' would be. Once I do so his knees buckle allowing me to knee him straight in the face so that he topples over and I can run right out of the 'dorm' and get help.

Audrey applauds, "Much better! How did that feel?"

I nod with a laugh, "Better but I'm still scared to death. Milo are you sure you're not an actor that was terrifying my heart is still racing."

He takes off his protective helmet and bodysuit, "It has to be, the real thing will be worse."

"I know," I say with a sigh.

"It can only get better from here," Audrey says while pulling me into a hug.

Milo joins in, "Stay strong okay?"

I pull back with a smile, "I will."

"Promise?" He asks.

"Promise."

After grabbing my bag I follow Audrey to the waiting area where Jake is sitting looking at his phone patiently waiting for me.

His hair was a hot ruffled mess - so I can assume he took his motorcycle here. He wore a black button-down shirt with the first few buttons unbuttoned, paired with white-washed jeans.

Audrey stops with wide eyes and softly whispers to me, "Is that Jake?"

I nod with a smile as I see him.

"You didn't tell me he was hot!" Audrey softly laughs.

I shrug, "Yeah- A hot head-"

I walk towards him with a big smile, "Hey Jake."

The second he hears my voice he looks up with a smile with his eyes sparkling at me. He shoves his phone in his pocket, stands up and quickly walks over to me.

"Hey!" He says happily as if he missed me.

Jake wraps his arms around me and pulls me into a hug, "How'd it go?"

"Great," I say looking up at me and getting lost in his eyes.

He stares back at me and the world around me melts.

Audrey coughs to get my attention which pulls me back to planet earth.

I wiggle out of Jakes's arms and say, "Jake this is Audrey. Audrey this is Jake."

"Nice to meet you," Jake says holding out his hand.

"You too," Audrey says as she shakes his hand.

Moments later Milo comes strutting around the corner, "Where's the boyfriend at Nicole?" He shouts.

Jake looks up at MIlo and proudly says, "That'd be me."

I blush at how he was happy to be my boyfriend.

"Hey nice to meet you," Milo says as he shakes his hand, "You're treating her right, right?"

"Only the best for her," He says as he sends a cheeky smile and wink way causing me to turn into jello.

Why does he always do this to me?

"Ready to go?" He asks as turns to me.

"Yup."

He puts on his leather jacket, I put on my light pink hoodie and walk towards the doors when he says, "I'll pull up my bike wait here."

I nod as he runs outside to his motorcycle.

Milo immediately chimes in, "Wait whatttttt? That's your boyfriend?"

I nod, "Yup. Jake Vance."

"Okay, I did not see that one coming. He is like the total opposite of you. I was expecting some cute little nerd, not some six-foot bad boy!" He shouts.

I shrug with a smile, "He's not bad."

Milo rolls his eyes, "But hear my point. He has that whole stereotype going on. EVEN THE LEATHER JACKET AND MOTORCYCLE!"

Audrey and I laugh.

"But he does seem like a good kid," He finally admits, "And he seems crazy about you."

I smile wanting to say 'And I'm crazy about him' but decided against it.

Seconds later Jake pulls up to the front, "Bye guys see you soon!" and run out the door to Jake.

He stands next to his bike with his arms crossed and a devilish smirk plastered on his face.

"What?" I question crossing my arms as well.

"Ya gonna give your boyfriend a kiss?"

I raise an eyebrow, "What if I don't want to"

He laughs, "Trust me. You want to."

I laugh as I shake my head.

"Come here," He says.

I stand on my tippy toes as Jake wraps his arms around me and pulls me into him. I gently place my lips on his as he lifts me up to his height.

Sometimes I hate being so short, but moments like this make me love it.

• • •

Shoutouts to @blue29bird @S-G-S-06 @UrBritishFilipina
and @blocked_from_reality

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Alyssa Rose