One Thousand Miles

Chapter  |  That's Not What I Had Planned

Part  |  One

The day after John had laid a hand on me, went okay. After I finished crying in the break room I caked my face with makeup to hide the bruises and refrained from crying throughout the day. I didn't think anybody would notice that there was something wrong with me, but Todd did. He did as soon as I told him I couldn't go to lunch with him. 

He stares at me with a puzzled look before finally an award winning smile breaks out on his face. "Oh, I see. You want to try to spend your break with your husband, right?"

I couldn't answer him back because of how scared I felt when he mentioned John. I was too scared to go home because I didn't know if tonight would be anything like yesterday night. I haven't talked to him since dinner last night. He had locked himself in his office to finish work and eventually came to bed while I was sleeping. This morning I woke up earlier than my normal time, left him a note saying his breakfast was in the microwave, even added a smiley face, and sprinted out the door. From the time I walked out the door and the normal time I started for work I drove to a McDonald's in the city and had breakfast there.

"Steph, are you okay? You're starting to scare me, is everything okay?" Todd asks, managing to break me out of my thoughts.

I look at him for a moment then smile. "Yeah, why wouldn't everything be okay? I'm fine, no need to worry about me!" I say cheerfully.

He must have noticed because his concerned expression stayed. "Stephanie, is everything alright, please tell me the truth, I can tell when you're lying. Is everything alright at home?"

My husband just beat me yesterday, which is totally normal, so everything is just peachy at home!

I sigh and move my hair out of my face before placing it on Todd's shoulder. "Look, there is nothing wrong with me. I'm just tired, okay? I didn't get much sleep last night."

"John keep you up?" he asked with a wink.

I looked at him with disbelief, but it soon vanished and a smile appeared on my lips before it dropped. He wasn't wrong. Almost every hour I'd wake up because of the same nightmare I kept having. It was exactly how it had happened in real life too; John slapped, then kicked, and lastly punched me before I woke up. "Yeah, you can say something like that."

Todd hadn't questioned me after that, which I was glad for. The rest of the day I didn't see much of him, which was also a plus even though I really needed a friend to take my mind off of things. The moment I pulled up in front of the big iron gates, fear shot throughout my whole body. The guard didn't have to ask who I was since he knew who I was, and opened up the gates for me. I knew John wouldn't be home for at least another hour, so I quickly made dinner, ate as fast as I could, and stuck John's plate in the refrigerator. I didn't want to have to face John, so I quickly ran out the kitchen and started up the stairs until a very familiar voice stopped me.

"Hey," I heard John say from behind me.

I froze on the fourth step and clutched the railing tight. I squeezed my eyes shut and blamed myself for not eating fast enough. Since it was my fault that I was having this run-in with John, I had to make a decision. I could either hurry up the stairs and act like I didn't hear him, or turn around and acknowledge his presence. I decided to go with the latter, I'm sure he wouldn't have liked it if I ignored him. It just seemed like the less violent option.

"Hey," I say quietly.

He's standing there holding his briefcase in one hand and in the other he's holding a bouquet of flowers. "I missed you this morning, why did you leave so early?"

I left early because I was scared to talk to you. "Because I...I don't know."

He sighs before placing his suitcase down. He stares at me for a moment before whispering, "Come here."

As much as I didn't want to, I had to if I wanted to avoid being yelled at or hit. I stepped forward until I was directly in front of him looking down. He lifted my chin and stared into my eyes.

"I am so sorry," he whispered as he ran his thumb over my cheek. "I promise you I won't do it again, I swear."

"Okay," I say softly. He stands there running his thumb across both my cheek and jaw before hanging over the flowers. The rest of the night was okay. We watched a movie and ate popcorn before falling asleep. As we watched the movie I saw signs of the John I know and love. I knew he was still there, but it was going to take some time to believe that he was back to his normal self.

Sadly, a week isn't enough time...

A week after he'd promised that he would never hit me again, he hit me. After work I had visited my parents and didn't get back home until half past eight. He demanded to know where I was, but when I told him he didn't believe me. We argued back and forth until finally I just gave up and tried to walk off. Next thing you know, the air is knocked out of my lungs, there's pain in my back, and I'm falling to the floor. When I hit the floor he rolled me over before grabbing me by the arms and dragging me into the living room. As he's dragging me, I'm crying and screaming for help, but he yells at me to shut up. He picked me up and threw me on the couch before climbing on top of me and pinning me down. He backhanded me before he started to yell in my face. 

"Do I need to teach you a lesson?" he asked as he started to undo his belt.

I shook my head, but he didn't listen. He ended up hitting me with the belt several times before he grew tired and walked out the room. I laid there in a fetal position crying my eyes out. At first I thought he wouldn't come back, but he did. That next morning I woke up wrapped up in a blanket, and I knew I hadn't put it there.

The morning dragged by slow, and since it was the weekend I was off. I was bored out of my mind and really needed something to take my mind off of John. I called Tanya even though John wouldn't like it if she came by, but since he had to work, I could invite her over without him knowing.

When I called and asked her to come over she told me she would be there in about an hour which caused me to internally groan. Once we hung up the phone I quickly headed upstairs and showered before applying makeup to my face, changing into my bathing suit, and slipping on a T-shirt and shorts. As soon as I slipped my shirt over my head, I realized that if I wore this, the bruised would show. Even though it was a pretty hot day for mid-September I decided to change into a longer sleeved shirt.

I knew Tanya would ask questions once she saw the bruises. I didn't want to answer any questions because that would mean I would have to think of those terrible memories.

When Tanya arrived she had one of the hugest smiles on her face. I was glad I was able to smile without force. I was tired of putting on a fake smile because that really made me think of how sad I felt about what's been going on between John and I. It felt nice to smile and actually feel happy.

"Oh, Steph it feels like it's been years since the last time I saw you," Tanya said as she pulled me in for a hug.

I laughed and hugged her back. "The last time I saw you was like last month."

She rolled her eyes and smiled. "Yeah I know, but every time I try to talk or hang out with you you're always busy with work, or John. I swear that man is....ugh!"

I sigh. "Yeah."

We walk back to the backyard and sit down in a chair before starting up a conversation. She told me about what's been going on with her life which wasn't any different from the last time she told me. Other than the fact that Tyler was trying to get custody of his four year old son, there was nothing new. When she asked about me I just told her everything except for the first and second time John hit me.

"Well that's nice," she stood as she stood up from her chair. "Come on lets go take a swim, it hot. I can tell you're definitely hot in that long sleeved shirt. I mean seriously Steph, yeah it may be close to fall, but it isn't cold just yet."

I look at her with wide eyes and shake my head. "No, I think I'll just sit right here."

She sucked her teeth and rolled her eyes. "Nope, nope, nope, I'm not taking no for an answer. Now get your lazy ass up and get into that pool."

I sighed. I knew that she wasn't take no for an answer, so I slowly stood up and reached for the hem of my shirt. I slowly lifted it up and over my head before throwing it down on the chair I was just sitting in. I looked down just as she gasped.

"What the hell happened to you?" Tanya asked as she looked at my bruised arm with shock.

I shook my head. "Nothing, it was....rough sex, okay?" I slip off my shorts and turn to place them on the chair along with my shirt. Once the shorts land on the chair, I hear her gasp again. I turn around and raise an eyebrow, but she takes a few steps forward and turns my body around so my back is facing her.

I look at her over my shoulder and she just looks back at me with anger and shock. "Rough sex my ass, Stephanie! John's beating you, isn't he?" I open my mouth to respond, but she cuts me off. "And don't you lie to me!"

"Well..."

"Well what?" she asks.

I sigh and turn my head around so I'm no longer facing her. I blink away the tears forming in my eyes before mumbling my answer.

"I'm sorry what?"

I sigh and blink some more. "Yes, Tanya." I hear her breathing hitch. "John's beating me."