fifty seven | dark showers

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Since y'all wanted some Colby action..

Colby's POV

I stepped into the hot shower, letting the scolding hot water fall down my body.

Escaping reality for a while.

Trying not to break down for just 10 minutes.

Often I would sit in the shower for hours.

Because it was a distraction from what was happening.

It had only been 3 months and there was one month left.

I wanted to be strong and wait it out.

It was unbearable.

And everyday got harder and heavier.

I hadn't left the house in about 2 weeks.

I only left my room if I had to.

I felt sick.

Poorly.

I hadn't been eating.

I hadn't been sleeping.

I tried my best for her but nothing was worth it anymore.

The only thing I would look forward to is seeing her again.

Seeing Ronnie.

Just to touch her skin.

Kiss her lips.

Cherish her and for everything she is.

It felt like she was never coming home.

It felt like I would never see her again.

I just miss her.

I miss the joy she brings to my life, to everyone's life.

I miss her comfort and how she could make the darkest of days seem bright.

And I've been having alot recently.

Dark days.

I could tell everyone's worried.

Worried about me.

Sam especially.

He doesn't think I realise that he is weary.

He leaves his door open all the time so he can hear what I'm doing.

I've heard him stand outside my door, Just listening.

I hate that I put him through this.

I hate that I put everyone through this.

I want to be happy and strong for Ronnie but she was the one who made me that way.

Without her I'm lost.

I sighed and switched off the shower.

I stepped out, wrapping a towel around my waist.

I dry my shoulder with gentle pats.

I turned my body so I could see the mark.

The bullet mark.

The permanent scar and reminder of something that hurt someone I loved.

It was still scabbing and healing but it didn't hurt as much anymore.

I thought it would of fully healed by now.

I pulled out the medical tape and cover ups from the cabinet.

Cutting the bandage and placing it down as I placed tape on the edges.

I sighed and brushed my teeth.

Slumping back into my room.

Throwing on some sweats and a t-shirt.

I flopped down onto my bed, staring at the roof,

"Colby?"

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