Chap 14: And Baby Makes Four

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      Growing up, I never saw myself becoming a mother or even having a child. Not that I necessarily didn't want kids, but I've always thought that any kid would be so much better not having me as a mother. I never thought I could ever be a good mom for any child, Not with the upbringing that I've had or the things I've had to endure growing up. I never thought I would ever be mature enough, no matter my age, to have someone else depend on me this much and in a way, I was fine with that realization. Not everyone was fit to be a parent, and I definitely wasn't.

          The fact that I've never actually had a role model in my life that I could take notes on, was frosting on the cake when I was concerned.

           When James and I started our relationship or whatever it was back in the days, I never thought that it would last long enough for me to even consider having a child with the man, especially because of how dysfunctional that relationship was.

          James had a lot of baggage he had to carry and I, myself, was emotionally damaged. I think in a way, that was the reason why we couldn't stay away from one another. James tried so hard not be like his father that in the end he became what he despised the most. And as for me, I wanted to be better than my prostitute of a mother that I ended becoming a fancier version of her. Though I wasn't sleeping with many men, but people could see what James and I had at the beginning and draw that same conclusion.

          Nevertheless, even with all that has happened between us, all the heartbreaks and the pains and the breakups and then the makeups, we've found our way back to each other. We've grown separately and together, and we are still learning along the way and aren't scared to seek help.

           Four years ago, when I found out I was carrying James' child, we both were in horrible places in our lives, trying to fight our demons. We weren't ready. I wasn't ready.

           Well this time around, five years after we've first laid eyes on one another and even with the things currently happening in our lives, there would be no other more perfect moment than this. We had been ready for that wonderful step. And even though that thought alone was frightening, I welcomed it with open arms.

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        There was a not so subtle  knock on the door of the bathroom that I was currently occupying.

         "Yes?" I called out, already knowing who it was since she had been bugging me for the past five minutes.

        "So?" Rose asked.

        "Nothing yet." I replied.

         "Ughhhhh," She groaned, then adding right after, "What's taking so long? It's not that hard." Of course, referring to the reason why I had been sitting on that toilet seat and hadn't peed on the pregnancy stick yet.

          "How can I go when you're behind the damn door pressuring me and shit." I retorted while concentrating on what my mission was; to pee on the freaking test.

         "Maybe you should give her more water to drink or something." I frowned. Was that Eva I was hearing? I leaned my body toward the door to be able to hear clearly what was being said.

         "Eva, trust me. I gave her enough water. She's either holding it in or there's something wrong with her freaking bladder." Rose replied.

         "Did you call Eva?" I yelled out to make sure Rose could hear me.

        "Yes, I did. Now hurry up."

        I scoffed, a little bemused. I honestly thought we would have waited for the results to come up before calling our friends with the news, I wasn't expecting Rose, with her big mouth, to just go ahead and call them.

         Maybe if I concentrated more on the task at hand, maybe that would work. I waited....and waited...and waited. Then there was a louder knock on the door before it opened and Rose appeared with a jug of apple juice, which she handed me.

       "Here. Your favorite. Drink up." She smiled widely and I,  in return, rolled my eyes, opened the bottle and downed as much of the container as I could.

        Then, we waited some more.

        "Guys, did I tell you how sore my nipples are? Harper is seriously trying to chew them off, I swear It wasn't this bad with Arden." Eva said through the phone, about the newest addition to her family. Harper, the second daughter of Frederick and Eva Halter, was born two months ago, something I would never forget because that was on the same day that we got served the custody papers. Happy birthday, baby girl.

        "She's just not latching properly, try to change her feeding position, that generally helps with that. It was like this with Levy too, the first couple of months but then it got better." Rose replied while staring at me and making hand gestures to signal me to move it along and be done already. I groaned.

         "Yeah, maybe you're right. After all, she's only two months old. I'll wait a bit to see if it gets better or else I'll have to put her on formula, even though I would hate to do that." Eva continued and while I listened to the conversation, I couldn't help but think that it wouldn't be so bad to carry James' child. After all, that had been my goal for a few months now.

           Though if I were actually pregnant, I would have to admit that the pregnancy couldn't possible have come at a worst time, with Jemma back and fighting for custody and all. My focus should be on Bastian.

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       "Hand me the other test, please." I asked Rose who had by then sat down on the bathroom floor, refusing to leave, yet she wondered why I wasn't able to pee. Apparently, personal space was a thing of the past now, at least when it came to us.

        She quickly got up. "Why? Are you finally peeing?"

        I nodded. "Yup. I figured I might as well do both test to save me from having to sit here for another ten minutes with you breathing down my neck." She handed me the test.

        "Hahaha, hilarious." She laughed, sarcasm written all over it, before addressing Eva on the other line. "Eva, she's finally urinating. I'll call you back when we get the results."

       "Great, I'll be impatiently waiting while my nipples get destroyed by this child." Rose and I started laughing. "Oh and Charlotte, I'm so proud of you, baby. Good job on the peeing thing. I knew you could do it. I had faith."

         I rolled my eyes. "Whatever. I hope Harper bites one of your nipples off." I said and heard her laughing before she hung up. Obviously, I didn't actually wish that, not because of Eva herself, but because Harper still needed them to eat. I got up and flushed.

         "Give them to me, I'll hold it." Rose said, which made me turn around give her a deadpan  look.

          "Really? That's what we're doing now?"

          She shrugged and retrieved the tests from my hands. I turned back to the sink to wash my hands. "It usually doesn't take the full three minutes. If you're really pregnant it should show up within the first minute or two." She commented while staring at the tests as if she could conjure the results quicker than technology could.

         "One time," I started while soaping my hands, "I asked James if he would still want me when I'm all pregnant and fat and he said," I cleared my throat to mimic james' voice. "'Baby, I will love you even more because you're fat and pregnant.' I mean, how freaking cute is that? The James from five years ago would have never said such things." I smiled fondly while remembering that night. I also remembered that the sex was particularly even better, as if that was possible...but it was...even better, I mean.

          I looked into the mirror while rinsing my hands to find Rose still staring at the tests. I sighed and dried my hands before turning back to her.

         "Hey, I'm sure it's been more than three minutes so obviously the tests are negatives, your staring at it like this won't change a thing. The one that I took last night might have been a false-negative." I said, forcing the nonchalance to show in my voice, though I was breaking inside.

         Rose finally took her eyes off the tests long enough to stare at me in confusion. "What are you talking about? Of course you're pregnant. I was just trying to understand how this whole thing works. The technology part of it, of course." My eyes widened and at that moment, I realized I couldn't quite move while she babbled on as if she hadn't just told me that I was pregnant.

         "Rose," I shook my head, unable to recognize my own voice. "I'm having a baby."

          Rose stopped staring at the tests, beaming with a sudden happiness. All the pretending to care about the way the tests were made, vanished."WE ARE HAVING A BABY!!!" And just like that, she pulled me in for a hug while jumping like her toddler.

A baby. My baby. And then the tears started!
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I'm sooooo happy that she's pregnant, I love babies sooooo much! But don't get too comfortable, just know I looooove drama 😏😉😋 Don't forget to vote.
        

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