{EIGHTEEN}
                    "Why the fuck was fez driving down the street with a ski mask?"

-

Ash hadn't talked to me since the car, that was two days ago. I guess in some ways I was happy because that meant I wasn't awkward around him, but I felt a bit hurt. "Hey, ash. Are you mad at me?" I ask as he answers his phone. "What? No, Mari just come over." Ash says and I respond before hanging up.

-

"So what's up?" I ask as me and him sit on his bed. "Well,-" he begins to say. "Why the fuck was fez driving down the street with a ski mask?" I ask cutting him off. "Not sure. But I wasn't mad at you." Ash says. "So what's the not talking and shit about?" I ask. "I'm not sure how to explain it. It's just I get awkward around you, and I know this shit sounds corny, but you make me feel..crazy. In a good way though!" He says.

"Ash, I feel awkward around you too.. but that's just because you hate me." I say laughing. My laughter stops as ash bring his hand up, holding my chin up to look at him. "Amari, if you knew the things I thought around you, you'd know that I definitely don't hate you." He says.

"Are they good thoughts?" I ask. "Obviously." Ash says. We stare at each other for a while before ash glances down at my lips. He begins to lean in, I'm hesitant. Ain't no way I'd fuck up my first kiss. As I could feel ash's breath close to my face, our lips brushing a loud and vigorous knock made us jump away from each other.

Ash then cleared his throat before getting up and walking downstairs. I awkwardly followed him. Once he opened the door an angry mouse and Custer walked through. "Where's big bro?" He asks ash who shrugs obviously not wanting to talk with him.

We sit in silence for a while, me glancing at mouse with very gruesome thoughts, and ash wondering what would've happened if mouse didn't knock that second. "Where you been?" Mouse asks fez as he watches fez walk in. "I got caught up with some shit." Fez mumbles. By now me and ash had moved to the hallway, away from the bullshit.

Fez then threw three bands on the table, one with a dollar bill covered with a splatter of blood. "Shit.." I whisper. "Are we good here?" Fez asks mouse. Mouse then slightly brushes the gun he has in his hands. "Nah, I don't think so." He says. I hadn't noticed but ashtray had moved back and grabbed something.

It was a fucking hammer. "No ashtray." I mumble. "Ash!" I yell but it was too late. He struck mouse in the head and Custer straight in the nose. "Fuck ashtray! As much as we all wanted him dead, fuck!" I yell, rubbing my hands up and down my head.

I couldn't think with Custer's continued yelling, so I walked up to him, pinching his broken nose. "Shut the fuck up, or I'll make you and you won't talk ever again." I say twisting his nose.

-
Once everything was cleaned up I decided to approach ash. "What happened earlier?" I ask him. "Nothing happened Amari." He says. "Not with mouse, with us." I ask him. "Nothing, like I said." He repeats. "So you almost kissing me was nothing? All that shit you said?" I ask him and he looks blankly at me. "I-I was high." He says using his hands to talk. "Bullshit." I mumble.

"So we're you fucking high when you killed mouse?" I ask and walk away from him, slamming the front door. I immediately regretted it, but what was said could never be taken back. At that moment I wanted to run back in and apologize, but I also didn't because he just played with me fucking emotions.

-

"Maddy, his lips were literally touching mine, but we didn't kiss." I explain to Maddy as she sits on my bedroom floor. "So wait, he said it was all nothing after?" She asks. "Yes!" I say. "So what would've happened if he actually kissed you? Would it be nothing too?" Maddy says.

"I don't even know mads, I'm just fucking confused. And I said some fucked up shit too." I say. "Well than y'all are both wrong so y'all both need to apologize, which means y'all are never making up or out ever because y'all are to stubborn." Maddy shrugs. "Am not!" I exclaim. "Then go say sorry right now." Maddy suggests.

"Hell no. I may have been an asshole for like a second, but he played with my feelings for months Maddy! Months! I've liked him for 4 months even if I didn't know, I've know him for almost eight!." I tell her.

"Well you have a point." Maddy says and I exclaim. "See! So he should apologize for being a bitch, making out with a bitch, in front of me as a matter of fact and then doing all of that shit and saying it was fucking nothing. So if he took my first kiss it would mean nothing, like come on!" I yell.

"Maddy it's all gonna change." I say. "How?" She also. "Because, he was always here for me. And now I have no one. But your not no one alright?" I tell her and she nods. "It's just, how can I like someone who hates me. It doesn't make any sense." I tell her.

Little did she know ash meant everything. It didn't mean nothing. It meant everything to him. Because he realized that he liked Mari from the second he saw her in her window, from the times he was rude and bitchy to her. He liked her. And now he could maybe even call it love, well maybe that to soon but ash knew that he'd have to say sorry soon, make up before the new year. That was 2 weeks away.