The picture is of Jared!

The person you are trying to reach can not come to the phone right now. Please leave a message after the tone.

*throat clears*

Alice, hi it's me, Jared. Umm...I know you probably don't want to be bothered, but...I don't know, I haven't heard from you in awhile. I...miss you. Today is the day...of course you know that...right well, umm give me a call sometime...

I sat on my bed staring at my cell phone and the voicemail that I have listened to over and over again.

I shook my head. How could he? How could he call me, on a day like this no less and act like he even deserves a response. He left me...he left us. He didn't even stay for the funeral and he has the balls to say he misses me.

I threw my phone against the wall and sat in silence as I stared at it on the floor. I could hear my heartbeat it was so quiet. The steady rhythm echoed in my mind as I struggled to forget what this day actually meant.

June 13. A date that holds darkness. A date that serves as a reminder of who my family no longer has. A date that throws me back into the threshold of mourning. While the matter resides in the back of my mind daily, this day is like no other.

I took a shaky breath before slipping on my Birks and grabbing my sunglasses to head out of the house, without my phone. Without the incessant calls from family and friends about my father.

Trudging down the sidewalk, I cut through a field that lead to the water where I could sit for awhile before having to face everyone, especially my mother. She is going to be a mess today, rightfully so.

I stared at the waves. They were calm today. The sun warmed my back as I wrapped my arms around my legs and stared at a seagull dipping into the ocean to make an attempt to catch something. As runners passed by, I kept my head low, trying to remain unnoticed from the neighbors.

"Hey kiddo!" Dad rubbed the top of my head. Annoyed, I shot him a glare as I dropped my backpack onto the kitchen island and plopped into my seat in the kitchen nook.

"That bad huh?" he asked as he bit into an apple and tossed an envelope at Jared, giving him a stern look.

"Dad, I am the only one who isn't going to London on the class trip!" I exclaimed, embarrassed that my family is clearly the lamest at my school.

"Dude, you've already been," Jared mocked as he flicked a piece of his carrot at me.

I narrowed my eyes. "When I was five!" I defended myself. "Jared you got to go to California, tell Dad," I crossed my arms, determined to make this happen.

"Dad, you should let me take the brat to Cali," Jared grinned.

Dad chuckled. "Deal!" They high fived. My jaw dropped. Letting out a streak of frustration, I stood up and stomped out of the kitchen and up to my room.

"Alice?" Someone waved their hand in front of my face, snapping me out of a memory.

"Yes?" I asked, blinking to find Adam come into view. While normally the fact that he was shirtless would make me swoon, my heart felt slightly numb today. Today wasn't about him. Hot body, checked into my brain for a later time.

"Hey, wow I didn't expect to run into you," he rubbed the back of his head with a sheepish grin.

I looked away from him and went back to staring at the water, lapping onto the sand.

"Hey," he said again before sitting down next to me. "Are you okay?"

Without looking at him I smiled a small smile. "Of course I am, sorry, just a little out of it."

I could hear his breathing. He must have stopped mid run.

"I'm surprised to see you up this early rockstar," I halfheartedly joked.

"I love running in the mornings," he said. "It clears my head."

"I used to do that too," I said and remembered the countless miles I ran up and down this very beach with my brother. He used to push me into the water in order to try and make me lose our race.

"Used to?"

I glanced down before resting my chin on my knees.

"Yeah, I used to love running with my brother, we were very competitive," I let out a small sigh at the memory.

"You don't run anymore?" Adam quizzed.

I finally looked at him and replied. "I do. Im three years younger so you know...he went off to college and then I went off to college in a different area and we would still run together during the summer when were together again, but then--" I cut myself off, realizing I was revealing a bit too much to the new guy.

"Then what?" he asked.

"Oh you know, life happens," I murmured.

"Hey look, if this is about the other night," I held my hand up and cut him off.

"No, I'm sorry, I promise it's just a bad day is all," I smiled trying to ease him. He nodded and looked out at the water.

"Well, I'm sorry again," he laughed and rubbed his arm. "I know we had just met, I didn't mean to freak you out."

I wiped the sand off of my hands and scoot over to where I was now facing him. "Don't worry about it."

Because you obviously didn't freak me out.

He grinned and turned around to face me too. "Good," he murmured.

We sat in silence, just gazing at each other. He had his blonde hair in a bun at the base of his neck, but there were wisps blowing into his face. I ached to tuck them behind his ear.

What is wrong with me?

What do you mean what is wrong? Look at him.

Ugh I am awful for thinking about him on a day like this.

"Is everything okay?" He asked, interrupting my internal dialogue.

I laughed and started drawing in the sand. "Yeah, sorry."

He laughed. "Nah, no worries, it seems you have something heavy on your mind anyways," he said with a smile.

"I'm okay, honest," I held my hand up to my heart and sat up a little straighter. He smiled in response and leaned his elbows on to his knees.

"So," he began. "What are you doing later tonight?"

I sighed. "I have this thing with my--"

"Oh Alice dear!" I jerked my head up to find who said my name and found Mrs. Talkington walking her Great Danes. She shuffled over to me and held a hand out. I took it and she squeezed.

"Oh," she sighed. "I'm so sorry, I know today is just so hard. How is your mother? And Jared?" Genuine concern was written all over her face. My heart squeezed a little bit, but was touched at the comfort her hand gave me.

"Mom is...well you know how it is and Jared? Well...I haven't spoken to him in awhile, but I'm sure he is okay," I said.

"Oh dear, well we sure miss your father," she said petting her dogs as she shook her head. "You let me know if you need anything, anything at all."

"I will," I responded and smiled as she shuffled away, her dogs nearly dragging her into the water.

I glanced at Adam and saw the very expression I wanted to avoid, especially from him. I held a hand up and shook my head before he could speak.

"I don't need your pity," I said. I sighed and leaned back to watch the clouds move in. "I've had enough of it for a lifetime."

"You lost your father," he said, almost to make sense of it himself. "I'm so sorry Alice."

I popped my neck and raised my eyebrows. "Me too," I murmured.

After a few moments of silence, I glanced at him.

"Aren't you going to ask?" I was so used to everyone asking what happened, how my family was doing, yada yada yada. It was so exhausting.

"No," he said firmly. His eyes, searching mine, making me feel warm inside.

Surprised, I looked away. I've never not been asked.

"I lost my little sister," he began, his voice low. "I know how the process goes, I hated it, still do."

I looked up at him, my heart breaking. I can't imagine how Jared would handle losing me. "Adam, I'm so sorry."

He smiled and let out a deep breath. "Trust me when I say, it's okay," he said. He looked off at a couple running past us. The girl had horrible form and ran flat footed, but the guy kept pushing her and cheering her on.

"She had cancer, she's in a much better place now," he said, his mind far away. My heart ached for him. I could see the pain in his eyes, how he struggled not to think about her, but he also had a spark in his eyes about it. Almost a joy, like what he said was really true. He seemed sad, but happy she was out of pain.

I wish I were in that place.

"It gets better," he said and smiled.

"He was killed in a car accident two years ago," I murmured. I stared at my hands and felt my chest constricting from the impending sobs, begging to break out. The words still didn't feel right rolling off my tongue.

He didn't repsond, but I felt his knee bump my thigh as he scoot next to me and rest a hand on mine. I wasn't sure how I felt about it, but comfort on days like this is sometimes nice.

After a few moments, he pulled his hand away and let out a sigh.

"It's not fair," he murmured, watching the lifeguards take their places on the beach. People were setting up the umbrellas and unfolding chairs.

I shook my head, agreeing with him.

"But you know, how lucky are they?" Surprised, I looked up to see if he was serious. He smiled at my shocked expression. "No seriously, can you imagine the place they are in? Heaven..." he looked off in thought. "I can only imagine," he murmured, his eyes dancing as he stared back at me.

"I'm not sure if I've even faced his absence, let alone thought of where he went," I murmured, admitting it out loud.

"I didn't until this year actually," he said and leaned back, his abs in full view as he crossed his ankles and let his head fall back.

"What changed?" I asked, my eyes slightly distracted by his amazing body.

He pursed his lips in thought for a moment before answering. "I was tired of being angry," he said.

"I know she wouldn't want that for me." He laughed. "In fact, I know exactly what she would do if she were around to see how I acted. She would have smacked the living crap out of me and chewed me out." He raised his eyebrows and shook his head. "She was scary when she wanted to be."

I smiled and laid back in the sand, my hair spreading out underneath me. He laid down on his side, propping his head up with his hand and stared at me.

"I love your eyes," he said in wonder, his eyes wide as he watched me. My heart skipped and I smiled. "They reveal everything you know."

My eyebrows furrowed in confusion. He smiled and made an attempt to explain. "There are few people in this world who are vulnerable enough to let their eyes show their soul. I swear...your eyes reveal the most beautiful details about you." He lifted his free hand to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear. My skin burning from his touch.

"Spoken like a true artist," I murmured, not once taking my eyes off of his. A soft smile played on his lips.

"I like to imagine my sister in a ghost-like form still," he said.

I smiled. "That is weird and sweet all at the same time."

He shrugged. "It makes it easier for me, knowing she's looking down on me."

He stood up and held a hand out for me.

I took it and let him pull me up. "So," he said. "Is Jared your brother?"

I sighed. "Don't even get me started on him," I grumbled.