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F O U R T E E N


HADLEY HAS NEVER hated Mondays before.

Dexter does. Even Aanya complains about it every so often. Never Hadley though.

It's not that she doesn't enjoy the weekends. She just doesn't see anything wrong with going to school, or to work after taking a break.

She does now.

In fact, Hadley's wound tight this Monday morning. Taylor immediately notices this. Hadley barely put up a fight about letting him use the bathroom first earlier this morning, and she barely talked to anyone while they were having breakfast.

Sadie and Aanya have both been trying to convince her that she needed to talk to Dexter as soon as possible. Hadley hasn't promised them anything, but she knows in her heart that they're right. She and Dexter had barely spoken in days and neither of them bothered to text each other over the weekend.

It's such a major deviation from how they used to act around each other and while Hadley's been doing her best not to think too much about Dexter, it's becoming clear that she really sucks at it. She spent the whole day yesterday trying to distract herself by watching Daredevil or doing some advanced reading, but many times she found herself picking her phone up to read the last conversation she had with Dexter or actually typing up a message before promptly deleting it.

She isn't used to reaching out to people. Dexter, especially. With Dexter, there was never really any need to actually reach out. He was always there, right next to her. And if he wasn't, Hadley could just stay put without worrying because it's Dexter and he'll always, always find his way back to her no matter what.

But that doesn't seem to be the case now, and as much as Hadley wants to pretend that everything's all right, she knows it's not. But she's never been the one chasing after Dexter and she realizes now how difficult it must have been for him.

She has no idea what to do, and today they're going to meet at work and Hadley's at a complete loss. She doesn't know what to expect or what to say or how to act. She nearly skips the day, but decides against it when she remembered what she'd talked about with Sadie and Aanya.

Uneasiness churns in her stomach while she and Taylor drive to work. He doesn't miss this and as soon as they roll into the main highway, he says, "Anong meron?"

"What?"

"I asked you what's up."

Hadley grits her teeth. "I know what it means. I just—" Hadley cuts herself off and shakes her head, turning back to the car's window. "Never mind."

"What is it?"

"Nothing," Hadley says. "Everything's fine."

Taylor lets out an exaggerated sigh. He makes a wide turn and pulls into a different street and when they're safely settled into the lane, he slides a brief glance at her. "Don't give me that crap, sis."

Hadley does her best to keep her face blank.

This only riles Taylor up more. "Come on, Had. Don't you think it's high time for us to have a brother-sister heart-to-heart?"

Hadley can't help it. She makes a face and says, "Did you just—"

"Yes," he interrupts, a cheeky smile on his face. "I rarely ever go home so you better make the most of our precious bonding moments. I'll have you know that I'm known for giving great advice."

"Yeah, no."

"I do."

Hadley snorts. "No," she says. "You really don't. Remember when you told Drew to ask Anna out for prom? How did that turn out again?"

Taylor's face sours. "That's different."

"My point stands," she tells him. "You suck at giving advice."

"Well," Taylor says without missing a beat, "practice makes perfect, so tell me what's wrong. That way, I can practice."

"Nope," Hadley says and makes a show of turning back to the window and putting her earphones on.

She thinks that's the end of it, but she stands corrected because not a second later, Taylor's pulling the earphones out, ignoring her protests and fixing her with another brief but firm glance. "Is it Dexter?"

Hadley's breathing hitches. Her eyes snap to Taylor's, but he's already looking back at the road. There's a serious expression on his face and she wonders, for a second, how he could have possibly known this.

Since Taylor wasn't officially roped into helping out at the shop, he's free to come and go whenever, and in the past few days, he's mostly been going out with his friends. He hasn't been around the shop much and she definitely didn't expect him to pick up on the weirdness between her and Dexter.

"I'm your kuya, Had," he says softly. "The only time I'd seen you acting like this was when you and Dexter broke up."

She blinks, unable to completely process this.

"So," Taylor prompts when she doesn't immediately reply, "will you tell me what's up?"

Hadley can't though. Not really. And it's not just because it would be completely, totally weird (not to mention inappropriate) for her to tell her brother that she and Dexter had sex, but also because she and Taylor really just weren't the heart-to-heart type of siblings.

They loved each other, sure, but their love mostly translated to them forgiving each other despite the pranks and insults they every so often throw each other's way. Hadley could talk to him about her life through vague details but would really rather not go into specifics.

The same goes for him, she thinks, and Hadley's fine with that. In fact, Hadley prefers them like that.

But Taylor's still giving off an expectant vibe. He's focused on driving, but his eyes dart to her a couple times. It makes her feel restless and she fidgets in her seat, uncomfortable with seeing this side of him.

She stays silent.

Eventually, Taylor sighs. "Fine," he grumbles. "Have it your way."

They spend the rest of the ride in terse silence. Hadley couldn't get out of the car fast enough, but she stops short as soon as she reaches the door. Through it, she sees Dexter sitting on the counter tapping away on his phone. She watches him for a second, hand frozen on the door handle.

She isn't sure she could have found the courage to push the door open if Taylor hadn't stepped right behind her. Dexter looks up when they enter. Their eyes meet, but he doesn't grin like he usually does. Instead, they stare at each other, unmoving, both their expressions unreadable, and for the first time ever, Hadley feels as though they've finally acknowledged that something isn't quite right.

Hadley feels Taylor's burning gaze, so she quickly spurs into action. "Morning," she says, dropping her gaze as she walks towards the counter.

Dexter jumps off it and returns the greeting. "Hey."

"Is Dad in the kitchen?" she asks him. She keeps her eyes on the space between his eyes.

"Yeah."

She nods, looks away and, without another word, walks slips behind the counter to head to the kitchen, fully aware that Taylor's watching her go, and that Dexter, on the other hand, couldn't even look at her.

* * * * *

Dexter doesn't know what he wants to do.

All he knows is that he can't spend his summer working at Sweet Tooth only for him and Hadley to avoid each other. So he comes to work early and talks to Hadley's mom about quitting, making up a horrible excuse about gearing himself for college or something like that.

Tita didn't even question him. She'd thanked him profusely for helping out in the first place and assured him that Hadley's grandmother is almost better now. "Or I can always make use of that good-for-nothing son of mine," she said. And that was it.

It's Dexter's last day today, but Hadley doesn't know it yet. Tita actually told him that he doesn't have to stay today, but he felt bad enough for quitting so abruptly, so he decided he might as well see the day through. Just one more.

Honestly, he expects it to go by no differently than how their days have gone by last week. Hadley will be helping her parents in the kitchen and he will be out manning the counter.

There aren't too many customers that day. Dexter isn't surprised. Through the window, he can see the mass of thick, grey clouds rolling menacingly into the sky.

It's going to rain sooner or later, which means it'll be a slow day all around town. He spends most of the morning watching replays of League of Legends games on Youtube, wishing it can distract him from thinking about Hadley.

It doesn't.

He's still painfully aware of her presence. The mere fact that she's right there and that they're not fucking talking to each other makes it impossible for him to think of anything but this unbridgeable gap between them.

Dexter tries to focus on watching. He really does. But then he hears her muffled laughter from the kitchen and his heart falls a little. He can almost imagine her now, wrapping some candy or something while Tito Robert cracks a joke or another.

Dexter could have fit into the picture. He could be working right there with her, grabbing some candy when she's not looking. Hell, he'd do it even if she is. She'll try to slap his hand away and pretend his addiction to sweets irritates her when in fact, Dexter thinks, she finds it adorable.

He has no idea what the hell's happening on the video he's watching. He lets out a breath and gives up, but just when he's about to lock his phone, he gets a call from Henry.

He startles and clumsily swipes at his phone, pleasantly surprised to be hearing from his friend.

"Hey!" he says brightly.

Too brightly, perhaps, that Henry felt the need to say, "O—kay..."

He sounds like he's suspicious of Dexter. Henry always sounds like he's suspicious of Dexter—or anyone, for that matter. It makes Dexter feel like Henry's always onto him. He probably is. Henry always seems to know everything. Even now that he's all the way in Singapore and Dexter said literally just one word to him so far, it still feels as though he's already got everything figured out.

The last time they'd spoken was the night he landed in Singapore. It was just a short letting you know I'm safe call, and he hasn't called since.

"How's Singapore treating you?"

"Like royalty," Henry replies. "If, by Singapore, you mean my grandmother. I haven't done a single chore since I got here. I swear I'd live here, if I could."

Dexter raises an eyebrow, unable to keep himself from smiling. "Don't let your love for me stop you. I'm sure our feelings for each other are strong enough for us to manage this whole long distance thing."

Henry laughs. When Henry laughs, it's always loud and graceful at the same time. "You can always move in with me, Babe. We can even adopt a dog or something."

"Honey, you're afraid of dogs," Dexter points out.

"Well, you don't really like cats so I'm just being considerate of you."

"Sweetie, you know I'm willing to make sacrifices for you," Dexter says, a close-lipped smile playing on his lips.

"Careful," Henry tells him. "Hadley might hear you and get jealous of our secret love affair."

Dexter falters for a moment. He blinks and tries to recover, but that split-second of silence must have been enough for Henry to pick up that something isn't right. Still, Dexter tries. "She can always move in with us and let her be part of our love."

Henry's silent for a moment. Even in his silence, he seems suspicious of Dexter. When he finally speaks, he says, "Where is she anyway? I'm surprised you haven't already put me on speaker. You are in the shop, right?"

He sounds very passive-aggressive. Dexter's eyes unconsciously slides to the kitchen door before falling back on the counter. "Yeah. I'm here. She's, uh, helping her dad out in the kitchen."

"And you haven't called her out yet because..."

"Well, obviously, I want to keep you all to myself," Dexter replies without missing a beat, but Henry doesn't jump in. His friend stays silent, and Dexter's spirits fall a little.

"Dex," Henry says. "Is everything all right?"

Dexter doesn't answer. Once again, his eyes slide to the closed door separating him and Hadley. Finally, he heaves a sigh and slips out of the counter, holding the phone firmly against his ear. He goes out of the shop but hovers by the door to continue keeping an eye on the door.

"Dexter? Did something happen?"

He doesn't know if he should say anything. Dexter's always confided in Henry more than Colin. Not that he needed to confide much. Dexter doesn't like bottling up his feelings so he tells nearly everyone about his problems before shrugging them off completely.

It's times like these, however, that Dexter suddenly feels the need to reach out; to have someone tell him what to do, or what to feel, because he feels like life has just planted him in some kind of maze with no way out and he doesn't know where to begin looking for the right path.

"I don't know, Henry," he finally says. "Hadley and I haven't been getting along well for days now. I've—I've been avoiding her."

"What the fuck." Henry sounds alarmed. There's a rustle; a few thumps that told him Henry must have repositioned the phone. And then, he's back, sounding even more alarmed this time. "You're avoiding Hadley?"

Hearing someone other than himself say it makes Dexter cringe. He runs a hand through his hair and lets it sit there. "Yeah."

"What the fuck is going on there?"

Dexter swallows past the lump in his throat. He looks around for a moment, missing the bustling crowd that usually fills the streets of Rivermount. He doesn't know what he's expecting to find. The right answer, maybe?

Bullshit.

He already knows the answer. He's known it for quite a while now. Dexter's just been pretending not to see it.

He hangs his head low and drops his hand. Through the window, he lets his eyes stray back to that closed door again; knowing she's there, just beyond that fucking door the two of them have both been hiding behind for days now. Knowing he can just open it and stroll back into her life without even bothering to knock if he really wanted to. Knowing it's not that simple, of course not, because it's never fucking simple between them, and that was the problem, wasn't it?

That was always the fucking problem.

"Dex? Are you still there?"

He rips his gaze off the door and turns his back to it, fixing his gaze on the muted grey sky instead. "Yeah," he says. "Sorry."

"Will you tell me what's going on?"

Dexter's in a maze and he has no idea where to start looking for the way out. There might not even be one. He's tempted to stay where he is and pretend he isn't lost or desperate to figure it out, but he can't be stuck here forever.

He needs to make a move soon.

"Dex?"

The voice doesn't come from the phone, and Dexter turns around so quickly he nearly loses his balance. He finds Hadley holding the door open.

"Hey," she says.

"I have to go," Dexter says into the phone, keeping his eyes on Hadley's. Henry says something to him, but he's no longer listening. He ends the call and lets his hand fall to his side. The two of them stand there, eyes locked, the wind from the upcoming storm rushing past them.

"You weren't inside," Hadley tells him, sounding uncertain of her own words. "I thought you left."

There's an undercurrent to her words that Dexter doesn't miss, and it hits him with a wave of guilt that nearly makes his resolve crumble; makes him want to smile and pretend everything's all right so that the two of them can finally go back to normal.

He pushes it down and reminds himself he can't keep doing this. Not anymore. The maze will swallow him whole if he doesn't choose which way he'd go soon.

"Today's my last day," he tells her. "Working here, I mean."

Hadley drops her gaze. "Yeah. Dad told me."

Silence. There's silence everywhere, filling his thoughts and his heart and this unending space between them. It's too loud and demanding and it tears at Dexter's throat because he has no fucking idea what to say to break it

Hadley seems to feel this. Her eyes are wide when she snaps them back to Dexter's, almost like she knows exactly what he's struggling to choke out.

And she doesn't want to hear it. She takes a step back and clears her throat. "You still have thirty minutes before your lunch break, so—"

"Hadley."

She stops.

Dexter takes a breath. Or does he? He doesn't know. He can't tell. All he knows is that the words are begging to spill out and he wants them to but part of him also wants to rein them in and keep them locked away because how can he fucking let them spill out and ruin what's left of them?

What is left of them, though, other than this silence?

There's so much silence left between them.

He hates it. Detests it. Wishes it never existed in the first place. But the only thing he can do now is break it.

He lets out a breath, his shoulders slumping as the air leaves his body.

"I'm tired," he concedes. He doesn't let himself think or feel as his words slice into the silence, breaking it piece by fucking piece with every syllable rolling off his tongue. He looks her in the eye and sees the way the words fall around them. "I'm tired of us."

She takes in a sharp breath. Her panic shows and she searches his eyes, frantic. She's gasping for words and Dexter wants to take it back, take it all back and tug at her and say it's just a joke, just a goddamn fucking joke.

But it's not, so he says nothing and waits until the frantic look on her face disappears. Slowly, her expression settles into a cool, blank look and when she slides her eyes back to his, they've already gone ice cold.

"What are you trying to say?"

He drops his gaze to his hands. "Maybe we should stop this, Had. Maybe we should stop being friends."

* * * * *

His voice sounds unfamiliar to her. She hates it. She hates the words that slip out his mouth. She hates how heavily they fall between them.

"We can't keep pretending that everything's all right."

Anger sparks in her chest. It spreads like wildfire, and all of a sudden she finds herself stepping out of the doorway, walking closer to him, not once daring to look away from him.

"Pretending?" she spits out, drilling her eyes to his, hoping the venom in her voice scalds him. "You want us to stop pretending?"

He doesn't say anything. He stays silent as he looks at her, his eyes sad and tired and lifeless, and Hadley hates them. Hadley hates the way he stands. Hadley hates his silence almost as much as he hates his words and she's stuck there feeling all this hate clawing at her throat.

"You're the one who wanted to pretend everything was all right, Dex," she says. "You were the one who strolled into this place last week wearing that stupid, stupid fake smile of yours and now you're telling me you want us to stop pretending like it's my fault?"

"You wanted me to," he snaps. "You wanted me to pretend, Had. So I did."

"I wanted what?"

"You wanted to pretend it never happened!"

Hadley steps back. "What are you talking about?"

"We had sex, Had." He steps closer, almost threateningly. His voice drips with barely concealed anger and it nearly forces Hadley to step back. "We had sex and you wanted to pretend it never happened."

"I didn't want it to change anything!"

"How can it not?"

"Because it's

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