After catching up a little more and me making fun of how they go into my apartment to cry, we decided to pay Kylian a visit.

'Do you guys want anything to drink?' Kylian asked smiling, while me and Luca were sitting on the couch.

'No, thanks.' Luca said.

'Do you think you can bottle some of those tears in my apartment in a bottle?' I laughed.

Kylian's head shoot towards me instantly, his eyes wide in shock. 'You told her?!'

'That you bought it or that you both hang out and cry in there?' I laughed even harder.

'First of all, that happened once.' Kylian said sternly.

'No, it didn't.' Luca said, giving him a death stare.

'It's okay.' I laughed, planting a kiss on Luca's head. I got up and went straight for Kylian, wrapping my arms around him. 'Thank you.' I whispered.

'For what?' he chuckled. 'For crying in your apartment?'

'For not letting go.' my eyes met his, a soft smile on my face.

'That was never an option.' he winked.

***

After laughing and joking around and then trying to plan how it's going to be when they'll officially meet Pedri, a knock is heard at the door.

'Are you expecting someone?' I asked Kylian confused.

'No, no.' he shook his head. 'I don't think.' he walked towards his door.

He froze in front of the door, taking a few steps towards the mystery person.

'Who's that?' Luca asked.

After not getting an answer straight away, Luca got up and pushed Kylian out of the way.

'Is she here?'

Neymar.

'No.' Kylian said sternly.

'She's not in her apartment or Luca's.' Neymar said with his husky voice. 'So she's here.'

'She's sleeping.' Luca added.

I stood up and pushed them both out of the way. 'Did something happen?'

'Do you think I can talk to you for a second?' he asked with pleading eyes.

I turned around to look at my boys. 'It's okay.' I smiled.

'We'll be in the room.' Luca said and grabbed Kylian after him, who clearly didn't want to leave.

Neymar walked in, both of us awkwardly looking at eachother. He took a deep breath, his eyes not searching for mine for once.

'I wanted to...' he was trying to find his words. 'I wanted to speak to you and see how you're doing.' he said softly.

'We spoke during the match.' I chuckled.

'I know, I know.' he smiled. 'But that was more of a you trying to shut me up conversation.'

'I don't think us getting into the details of our lives is something that we should do.'

And for once, his presence didn't bring me joy or sadness. It brought me nothing. He wasn't my safe place anymore. He made that clear when he cheated on me. He moved on. He let go and so did I. I had to. Yes, I cared about him and loved him, but not how I did before. I wasn't going to fall at his feet or for his words or his lies.

'I was really debating whether I should come here or not...' he swallowed hard. 'But after seeing you today, I couldn't not show up. I missed you so much, you have no idea.'

'I missed you too, Ney, and it was really good seeing you.' I smiled. 'But you didn't have to come here. Missing eachother is just a normal human being emotion.'

'You don't get it.' he shook his head. 'I miss you.' his eyes finally met mine.

'Yeah, well, if you wouldn't of done what you did...' I paused. 'You wouldn't have to miss me.'

'I know, I know. Trust me, I know.' he said quietly. 'I tried to let go, I tried to move on, I tried. I go to bed thinking about you and I wake up thinking about you. I—'

'Stop.' I said sternly. 'Stop, please.' I whispered, taking a step towards him. 'I appreciate you coming here and telling me all those things, but it's too late. You said you'll do anything in your power to get me back. That you'll kiss the ground I walk on.' I laughed. 'But you moved on. I left and you let go as soon as I did.'

'I need you.' he said, his eyes now glossy. 'Please.'

'Why?' I said a blank expression on my face. 'Why now?'

'I know now what life is without you and I don't like it. You think I moved on, but I didn't. I hate that you're not here anymore. I hate that I don't speak to you. I hate that I don't see you. I hate that I am someone that I am not.' he looked down for a second. 'Does no part of you love me still after all?'

'It does.' I nodded my head. 'But I know how my life is without you in it. I grew to adapt to it. And as hard as it is, I'm better off like this. And I don't owe you anything.'

'I know you don't...'

'So you don't get to ask if I think about you, or if I miss you, or if a little part of me still cares or loves you. You don't get to ask because you broke my heart. You took everything away from me and you don't get the satisfaction of coming back just to see if I'm incomplete without you. You don't get to ask or wonder.' I said, trying my hardest to fight my tears. 'I moved on.'

'With Pedri?'

'It doesn't matter with who or how.' I said annoyed. 'I'm happy, I'm at peace, I managed to put back the pieces that you shattered. I don't wander into your life, disturbing you, so if you could kindly stop bullshiting me and stop wandering into my life, it would be really great.'

He silently stared at me, probably not expecting me to react this way.

'You have Bruna, Ney. She's at home waiting for you.' I said sternly. 'You should miss her, love her, think about her... not me.'

'Do you love him?'

'I don't know. Maybe I do.' I took a deep breath. 'Being with him, is so damn easy.' I softly smiled, my mind flying to the Barça boy.

'How do you know he already loves you?'

I looked at him and shook my head in disbelief. 'Because the way he looks at me when he thinks I'm not looking, is the way I used to look at you...'

He silently nodded his head, almost afraid to look at me. 'I'm sorry.' he said quietly. 'I'm sorry that it happened this way...' his glossy eyes met mine.

'Yeah...' I nodded my head with a sincere smile. 'Me too.' I quickly wiped the tears that managed to escape.

'Have a good night.' he smiled softly, turning around and exiting the apartment.

Love.

They tell you love is supposed to be hard. That love isn't pretty. And that love hurts. But why does love always have to hurt?

Well, for me, love didn't always hurt. It was dancing in the middle of the night in his kitchen, it was waking up next to eachother, it was laughing and smiling and thriving together...

I don't regret loving him, but I regret letting him break my heart.

I cover my face with my hands, letting out a sigh. I hear the door opening, so I turn around to face the two boys that are looking at me with soft eyes.

'I'm okay.' I smile. 'I'm okay.' I reassure them.

'Do you want to go to your apartment so we can all cry?' Luca asked chuckling.

'Or maybe you want me to bottle some of those tears for you?' Kylian added.

I laughed, a few more tears escaping my eyes. I walked towards them, throwing my arms around their necks and dragging them into a hug. 'You have no idea, how much I missed you.'

***

Neymar's POV:

I left Kylian's apartment not knowing how to feel. Not seeing her and not talking to her made it easier to move on. But then today, when she looked at me and was cheering everytime PSG scored, the way she was laughing and smiling with Luca and Kylian, the way she tried to include me...

I realised how hopelessly in love I was with her.

I am the one that messed up and I take complete responsibility for it. And I didn't just push her away from me. I pushed her away from everyone. My friends. Our friends. My fans. Our fans. Everyone lost her...

I lost her.