Okay, soo...

Dear Diary

No Adora what are you five?

Hey dude...

Are you kidding me?

You know what no greeting.

My name is Adora BlackRose and I will only be doing this stupid shit only cause the dude I visit once a week in that rich mansion makes me write this crap.

For the ones that don't get it, it's my therapist and he has this stupid idea that If I write my thoughts down I will suddenly out of nowhere have a perfect life.

Perfect life...

There is no such fucking thing.

No matter how they present life in those fucking fairytales where the pretty little girl with family issues meets the love of her life and they fall in love in like two days.

And then of course...they live happily ever after.

And it's not like it teaches children anything.

Take Snow White as an example.

She was wandering in the woods like some kind of raccoon and lived in the same house with some kind of short strangers with weird names. And if that was not enough she was okay with doing chores for those dudes wearing those stupid hats. And I don't even think I need to mention her taking poisonous apples from old ladies. Then she fell in love with that ugly prince guy who according to the real version of the book raped her to wake her up.

Ohhh and did I mention she was fourteen?

And I don't even think I need to say anything about Cinderella. Her whole love story was based on her shoe size. And do not tell me that the prince would love her the way she is. Because if she had gone to the dance with her flip-flops the only thing the prince would do is give her his shoes to get them cleaned.

Am I rambling on again?

Yeah most likely. I tend to do that when I am on my own. Well, maybe I should write about my life and not Cinderella's.

So the important stuff...

I am seventeen. I have a little brother Eliot. That little bastard gets all the good Christmas gifts because apparently, I am " too old for presents" Shut the hell up.

So about-

What the fuck is that noise?

What the hell did my dad decide to do this morning?

Anyways let's say I don't have the best teenage life I dreamed of but it's ok I guess. My mother died four years ago and since then...everything is different. She was my person you know. She was so freaking beautiful. She had ocean blue breathtaking eyes, nothing like my shitty colored ones. Big lips. Long blonde hair although she loved to dye them different colors almost every month. She had like 50 different colorful tattoos but my favourite was definitely that beautiful blue butterfly on her left thigh. A lot of people thought it was weird for a mother of two children to look like that. But it was not something to be ashamed of. She was different and I loved her for that. She made me want to be different. So... when I lost her I lost Adora.

My dad James does try to help me. He has made me visit a couple of therapists. With the last one whose name I think is Darla or something things are going better than the other ones.

I had the most fun with the first one.

My dad found it weird when she told us that we had to stop our meetings.

Little did he know I fucked my therapist in every goddamn session we had while he thought my mental health was improving

What can I say?

She was hot.

And that's when I realized...

I am never gonna be normal again.

And that's ok. I think. I mean, my mum wasn't normal but everyone loved her, she was a freaking angel.

So about school... you know this is so fucking stupid and I am so fucking bad at this. Anyways school is...ok, I guess. My grades could get better but I am trying really hard. Well, at least that's what my dad thinks. It's been four years since my mother's death so everyone thinks that I am over it. Which I am...I am fine ...on the surface at least.

I don't have many friends. Well, I don't have many 'true' friends. A lot of people tried to approach me after my mother's death but none of them actually cared. Except for Daniel. God, I love this guy so much even though I don't admit it. I know him since I was 4 when we met in pre-school and since then we are inseparable. He makes me feel good and he was always there for me.

Anyways.

Let's spice things up a bit. To the sex part.

I have a girlfriend her name is Joanna. Well if you can call what we have a relationship.

I can't say I am in love with her as much as she is, but man she knows how to use her tongue. I can say I have experience. I mean girls, guys, virgins, adults, teachers. In some words, I have had enough sex in my life. Not that I will stop. God nooo... But Joanna is the only one I actually felt something with. I don't know what this but it's definitely not love. Although she has the ability to cheer my mood. When she doesn't talk. All the others were just flings. And not even good ones. But what can I say? I am not the kind of person who does love.

Love makes you weak. And if you love somebody enough you will give fucking everything up for them. And I am not gonna let that happen. The only thing I need is someone to know how to pleasure me and then leave me alone.

That's the dream. For me at least

You know what? Now that you know enough about my dramatic life, I am gonna have to get up now to get dressed and go to school and live my happy teenage life the way I saw it in Disney Channel movies.

Goodbye, Diary...

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So i decided to change the first chapter of my story and i hope you like this one better.
For the ones that first reading my story i hope you enjoy it. Feel free to tell me how you feel about the story and make me any recommendations for it.
Anyways see you in the next chapter 😘