Forty Five

Background color
Font
Font size
Line height

Dimitri Marcello

I open my eyes and start shifting to get comfortable. I stop when I notice weight on me. I look down at Day gripping onto me in his sleep.

Awe.

I study his face in the light coming from the TV.

My heart picks up some speed. I just breathe through it and look up at the ceiling.

Damn.

I'm really letting all of this get to me. Him being here isn't good if he doesn't want me as much as I want him.

I more than just want him. I feel like I need him. People make shitty choices all the time.

I wrap my arm around him.

Who am I to blame him.

I scoff.

A human being.

"He fucked up," I mumble to myself.

To be honest , the only reason I blamed him so much is because I was hurting so bad. I started falling in love with his stubborn ass.

I reach over and shake him.

"Wake up," I tell him.

He groans and grips my bare sides tighter.

Let me go please.

He settles again and his breathing gets heavy.

I don't want him to, but he should.

"Day," I shake him.

His head drops in my lap. I pause for a second.

Shit.

I pick him up and sit him up straight on the couch. I cup his cheek and slap him lightly with my other hand.

My nigga. Don't almost die again.

"Day," I call him again, getting a little worried.

I slap him harder and he opens his eyes just a little bit. I sigh in relief.

Thank you.

"Crazy ass," I let go of him.

He closes his eyes again and tries to grab on to me again. I gently shove his hands away. He keeps trying to grab for me and it makes me laugh as he struggles, still stuck in sleep.

"Hey!"

He opens his eyes all the way up.

"Hm?" He looks a round red eyes.

He looks at me confused, but decides to not give fuck. He curls up wth the throw pillows.

I shouldn't of woke him now I want him to back where he was.

"Shouldn't been off that chronic with that type of medicine. Stop scaring me goddamit."

He holds his hands up. I squint to see him in the tv light.

"Shouldn't of eaten so little my nigga," he signs.

I sink into the cushions and focus my eyes on Star Wars playing on the TV. I feel him push me with his foot.

"What?" I ask.

"I was signing. Pay attention to me," he points to himself after he loosely signs.

I turn all the way around with my leg under me and face him.

"Yes."

He just eyes me.

"What?" I ask again.

What?

He makes a face and waves his hands fast. He shoos me away and I smack my lips.

"Don't nevermind me now," I sign and speak at the same time.

He lays his head down again and I poke his thigh.

"What?" I laugh, getting frustrated.

He hesitates, but follows through.

"Did I really scare you when I got sick?"

All I could do was look at him in shock.

"Did you?" I practically yell at the lil nigga.

His jaw drops and I see the sadness on his face.

"I didn't really know. I mean- I'm sorry."

"You don't have to be sorry you didn't chose to get sick," I tell him.

He moves closer to me.

I want to kiss him.

He thinks to himself.

"Wassup?" I ask.

"You remember why I said sorry right. It was different when u said it then. I apologized to you for me wronging you and not even respecting you enough to give you an explanation."

I shake my head and open my mouth to say something.

"I'm trying to forget it."

I am.

"Don't forget it. I know I hurt you and you should make me hurt just as bad."

"I swear-"

"Shut up," he catches me by surprise.

His voice is different and worn out. My nerves start jumping around.

"Shh, stop," I put my index finger over my lips.

Don't hurt yourself.

"You stop," he strains to get out and points at me.

I get mad.

"Shut the fuck up!" I grab his arms.

He looks at me with wide eyes.

"Stop trying to speak to prove something.You're gonna end up in the hospital and connected to all types of shit again. You don't have to prove anything to me anymore," I calm myself.

"I do."

I grip him a little tighter.

He doesn't get it.

"And what is that?" I ask.

He opens his mouth to say something, but he just starts coughing. I let him go and he hunches over while coughing into his fist.

I rub his back; the worry eats me up. He moves away from me and sits up.

"I can't explain it," he signs.

He grabs my cup from the coffee table and takes a sip.

"I got time," I tell him.

Please tell me what I want to tell you.

"It's confusing," he says and gets up.

There his fuck ass go, running.

I stand up fast as fuck and regret it when I feel the strain in my back. He sets my cup down.

I swear to god I'm too young to be feeling like this, ow.

He cracks his knuckles with his fingers; I move closer to him. He moves away when my lips almost touch his.

"I... I shouldn't of done that," I regret it.

He presses his lips against mine and it takes me a minute to gather my thoughts; my hands find their way to his waist.

He grabs them and pulls away from me. He holds his hands up to sign something.

"It's so backwards. I realized what you meant to me after the bullshit. I love you and it sucks to say it because I mean it to be genuine, but it could never seem that way," I think he says.

I lift my hands to his face and kiss him again.

"I love you," I tell him.

I do.

"I'm in love with you and it's sad that I didn't wanna tell you how much I was falling for you until I saw another nigga wanting you and having you the way I wanted to have you. I tried my best to be transparent. Even before Amir I let go of Shana for you. Okay? I think about you all the time. I'm not perfect, but I tried..."

Okay?

He steps towards me and wraps his arms around me. I hug him back while he buries his head in my chest.

"I can imagine how tired you are of this," I tell him.

He lets me go.

"I love you, but I'm scared. I don't want to move too fast for this to fall apart like before. I don't want this to be like Amir. I don't want to ruin it. I want to make sure we're both ready."

"I'm ready to love you, you just have to be ready to accept my love and love me back. I'll be here whenever you come to terms with whatever you feel," I tell him.

I kiss him on his forehead and he holds my arms. I slip away from him.

"Goodnight," I tell him and make my way to the stairs.

I'm not mad.

I'm not sad.

I'm not happy.

I'm satisfied with what I said and how I said it.

Bruh. I hate this chapter. I love this song though. How do you feel? Please be sure to vote and comment. Love you ๐Ÿ™‚๐Ÿ’›.

You are reading the story above: TeenFic.Net