"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are."
Anaïs Nin
August 20th, 2183
Commander Josslyn E. Shepard
_______________________________
Josslyn Shepard watched the snow and ice driving against the slanted windows of the Port Hanshan Plaza as she drank her coffee in silence. It was dark now, and it would be another twenty-three hours until Pax was in the sky, plenty of time to get the garage pass she needed. In the distance, a security guard watched her with a wary eye. The guard had been reporting her progress to Anoleis ever since they met with the Administrator earlier that afternoon.
Garrus, who stood just to her right, was being his usual impatient self, fidgeting with his rifle, shuffling on his feet. Try as she might, she couldn't get it into his thick, Turian skull that they weren't about to make the trip to Peak 15 in the dark. She understood his anxiety to some degree. The threat they faced was nearly beyond description. However, rushing headlong into trouble without a plan wasn't going to do anybody any good. They needed to be reasonable, to take only deliberate actions instead of wasting energy on reactions. Shepard owed Kaidan and the rest of the galaxy at least that much.
Liara was on her left. As usual, she had retreated into her head to hide away her emotions and anxiety. On the one hand, Shepard appreciated the exterior calm, so unlike the tension that boiled off her Turian friend. On the other hand, she'd pay good money to know what was going on behind those pretty blue eyes. What thoughts were hiding under those funny little tentacles? Hopefully, the Asari was saving a few of them for her Commander.
Shepard berated herself. 'There you go again. The entire galaxy is at stake, and you can't manage to put sex aside for more than ten minutes. What is wrong with you?'
Of course, she could berate herself all day and nothing would change. She'd still be the same old Josslyn Shepard. There were two wires running through her brain that were always hot enough to melt through any insulation she could coat herself in. One was war, the other women.
It wasn't exactly coincidental that she was primarily able to indulge in the latter by being exceptional at the former. Love was war, and war was love. They both required equal parts awareness, patience, skill, and passion. She'd built her reputation in both arenas by walking the high wire, learning to unleash and direct the savage inside without ever losing control of it. She was good at the game, damn good, but perhaps she'd grown a little too arrogant if recent events were any indication.
She'd been on a losing streak lately. She'd not only lost, but lost big. Chief Williams wasn't interested. Apparently, she was straight as an arrow, or at least too straight to consider Shepard an option. Worse, Ashley's flirting, which had felt so grand early in the game, had left Shepard twisted into a knot so tight, she was starting to worry if she'd ever be able to unravel herself again, and then there was Dr. T'Soni.
Liara was turning out to be a mystery Shepard couldn't quite solve. The Asari ran hot and cold. It was go, go, go, 'I like you Shepard, I am very interested,' and then full stop. 'We should focus on our mission.' Were all Asari (aside from Consort Shaira) so confused?
Her soldiering wasn't fairing much better. Virmire had been an unmitigated disaster. She'd lost Saren, let her best friend die, and all she had to show for it was the gratitude of a dozen Salarians and a wild story that the Council didn't believe. Hell, she wasn't even sure if she believed it herself.
"Shepard, you are fretting," said Liara.
Shepard shrugged. "Ah, I'll be ok, I just need to shoot something."
Garrus chuckled. "Commander, you're a woman after my own heart."
"Finger getting itchy too, Garrus?" asked Shepard.
"Oh, hell yes," said Garrus.
Liara sighed. "I will never understand how you two can approach killing so casually. These are sentient lives you're discussing. Men and women with families, dreams, and aspirations. Worse, in this case they are law officers."
Garrus shook his head. "Liara, Lorik Qui'in made it pretty clear that these so-called law officers are off the books, doing dirty work, and it's not like we're going to go in blasting. We'll give them a chance to step aside peacefully."
Liara's fretfulness only deepened. "And if they don't?"
"Then we'll have to put them down," said Shepard.
Liara shook her head. "But you say it like you almost enjoy it."
Shepard shrugged. "A part of me does, Liara. As I explained to Garrus just a few days ago; to be a warrior, you have to accept violence, as well as one's own capacity for savagery. The trick is controlling it, using it only when necessary, and never letting the primal part of yourself override the better angels of your nature."
Liara furrowed her pencil-thin eyebrows. "Better angels—a human expression? It sounds vaguely familiar."
Shepard cleared her throat. "Old reference, 19th century North America, but what I'm trying to say is, violence is acceptable only when it serves justice and when it's tempered with compassion."
Liara looked skeptical. "Shepard, I am not sure that makes any sense."
Shepard shrugged. "I enjoy shooting people, and then I feel bad about it later, especially after I learn a bit about the person I killed or maimed."
Garrus cocked his head. "Learn?"
Shepard nodded. "I read obituaries, extra-net blogs, and find out little bits about everyone I've ever killed, when I can. Sometimes I feel rotten about it, other times, if I find out they really deserved it, I'll take a drink and congratulate myself on making the galaxy a slightly better place."
Liara was alarmed. "Shepard, that's... frightening."
"I'm not sure if you're crazy, or just completely badass," said Garrus, "or maybe a little bit of both."
Shepard laughed. "Pretty sure the Council would agree with the first part of your statement."
Garrus nodded. "Hopefully, we can question or capture Benezia. Best case scenario, we bring her in to the Council and she supplies corroboratory evidence about the Reapers."
"Never plan for the best case," said Shepard. "Stick with the likely, and leave room for the worst. We have to assume she's indoctrinated like Shiala and Rana. We may be able to reason with her and get her to see it, but it isn't going to be easy. First we have to figure out what she's doing here."
Liara bit her lip, then forced herself to ask a question. "And what is the worst case scenario, Shepard?"
Shepard sighed. "She's like some of the Salarians we saw on Virmire, so far gone she's a raving lunatic, and we're forced to put her down. I'm sorry, Liara."
The Asari nodded. "Thank you for your honesty, Shepard. I already feared as much."
Shepard turned to Liara and gently set her hand on the Asari woman's shoulder. She felt a slight tremor through her finger tips. Liara was having difficulty suppressing her feelings. She felt so young, so innocent, and yet she was Shepard's senior by over seventy years.
'Don't play with her,' Shepard reminded herself. 'She asked for space, so let her have it.'
Shepard withdrew her hand just as Garrus came to the rescue.
"So, are we going to stand in front of the windows all night and let Anoleis's crew get what they need from Qui'in's office?"
Shepard snorted. "They have no chance without the key, Garrus. Synthetic Insights does AI work, which means their encryption is going to be next to unassailable, especially for a couple of rent-a-cops."
"Ok, then we are waiting for?" wondered the Turian.
Shepard pointed her chin towards the guard watching them. "Been thinking of a plan to throw him off the scent for a few minutes."
"Do you really think it matters? Anoleis is probably watching every move we make on a security feed."
Shepard laughed. "Garrus, haven't you noticed? There are no security feeds here. The whole point of Noveria is secrecy. All these corporations come here to do top secret research, research that they don't want anyone to know about. The last thing they'd allow are security cameras that could record what goes in and out of their labs."
The light went on in the Turian's eyes. "Ahhh, damn, how did I not think of that?"
Shepard shrugged, then opened up a secure com link to message her XO. "Presley, have Ashley and Wrex put together fire teams, then send them out to patrol the docking bay. As soon as they start their routes, tell Joker to power up the Normandy's sensor array."
There was a pause. "Commander, I feel it's my duty to remind you that scans are strictly illegal on Noveria. Not only would we risk heavy fines, we could get kicked off world."
"I know that, Presley," said Shepard. "I didn't say scan anything, I just said power the sensors up. It will set off the alarms in the hangar bay. Shut it down immediately. When Port Hanshan Control contacts you, tell them you were doing repairs on a tracking component and the VI automatically lit up the sensor array to calibrate, then you can send them sensor logs to prove that you didn't run a scan."
"Uh, ok, Commander, I'll take your word on this. Consider it done," said Presley.
"Over and out," said Shepard.
She clicked off her com link and smiled smugly.
Garrus laughed. "Yea, that'll do it. Every on duty ERCS in this joint is going to run off to the hangar bay."
Liara sighed. "And let's hope the guards don't open fire on Wrex and Ashley."
"If they do, that'll be the last mistake they ever make," said Shepard.
She gulped down the rest of her coffee, crumpled her paper cup, and tossed it into the recycle vacuum port. After giving a signal to her two companions, she took a stroll across the plaza, heading in the general direction of the garage entrance. The guard took notice and began to follow at a distance.
Shepard lowered her voice before asking Garrus. "Did you load that tranq round in your pea-shooter?"
"Yea, just as you asked," he answered. "As soon as he rounds the corner?"
"Yea," said Shepard. "There's a storage closet right there. I'll toss him into it right after you drop him, providing the coast is clear."
"Shouldn't be any traffic at all," said Garrus. "The garage is still off limits, and so is Synthetic Insights."
Liara took the lead as the trio entered the passage to the garage. As Garrus had predicted, there was no on in sight. The Turian set up his shot. Within moments, the guard lay on the ground, too stunned to open his com link. He was nearly comatose by the time Shepard secured him in the storage closet. She checked his vitals, found that his respiration was too shallow, and gave him a light dose of trelazyne to increase his heart rate.
"He's going to wake up a lot sooner," warned Garrus.
Shepard nodded. "Yea, but at least he'll wake up."
They took the elevator up to Qui'in's lab. Garrus changed out his ammo while Shepard checked the time on her Omni-tool and tried to gauge how long it would be until Joker fired up the sensor array. The elevator doors opened, revealing an empty foyer. They passed through to the main Synthetic Insights entrance and were immediately greeted by a couple of guards. Both of them looked nervous.
"Freeze, Hanshan Security, this office is sealed," said a woman who was clearly not up for a fight.
Shepard smirked. "What will you do if I don't?"
The woman stammered. "You're the Spectre, right? Lorik Qui'in is under investigation."
Shepard shook her head. "No, Anoleis is paying you to shake this place down. Does Captain Matsuo know you're here?"
The guard backed down immediately, lowering her weapon. "Hey, I'm not the one who wants Qui'in. Anoleis has a varren up his ass about this guy. How about this? You pretend you didn't see us, we'll pretend we didn't see you."
Shepard stepped aside to let them out. They went straight to the elevator without looking back once.
"Well, that was nice and easy," said Garrus.
There was a soft hissing noise from the far side of the office. Shepard recognized it at once; the intake of a weapon's gas cooling system. She let out a sigh.
"Dammit, Garrus," she said.
"I know, I know, spoke too soon..."
Shepard's team went into action immediately. There were three more guards behind the retainer walls. Liara and Shepard knocked them out of cover with their biotics while Garrus ventilated them in short order. It was sort of a sad display. ERCS training, while adequate for guard duty, didn't measure up in a real firefight. Once the guards were down, she lowered her pistol.
Shepard groaned. "Yea, well, sorry about the carpet, Lorik."
Garrus laughed. "As soon as he said it, you just knew..."
Shepard nodded. "Never fails; talk about the devil..."
"He always walks through the door," said Garrus.
Liara stared at her two companions. "One day I hope to be able to decipher this private language you speak."
Garrus contorted his face into what appeared to be the Turian equivalent of a grin. "Just a few more firefights, T'Soni. You'll get there."
They found Qui'in's computer on the 2nd floor of the office. Shepard used the encryption key to extract the files while Garrus kept a lookout. Just before they finished, Joker jumped on the com.
"Yea, Commander, just a little heads up. You have a shitload of pissed off ERCS guards headed your way," he said.
"I know, Joker," she answered. "Do me a damn favor though, and stay off the coms. I don't want them to get itchy and use a jammer on us."
"Ok, ok," said Joker. "No reason to be surly with me."
The encryption key beeped, signaling that all the data had been retrieved. Shepard thought she heard the elevator open on the lower floor. She made eye contact with Liara and Garrus to let them know to be ready. The trio readied their weapons as they made their way out the office and across a small corridor. Several ERCS guards were blocking their path to the stairs.
A blonde haired woman stepped forward. Shepard recognized her from an earlier incident in the docking bay. The name was Sergeant Kaira Stirling. Shepard had made her as a biotic, modest ability, but Stirling was under some sort of delusion that she was the real deal. She was itching to test herself against a Spectre. This wasn't going to end well for her.
Stirling sneered as Shepard approached. "I don't think you're supposed to be in here, Shepard."
Shepard grinned. "No, I'm not. Are you?"
Stirling brayed on, seemingly oblivious to the threat that the Spectre and her two companions presented. "Anoleis would throw you off world for what you did here. I won't. You know what we did to cop killers on my world?"
Garrus interjected. "Your men are dirty, Sergeant. You're here off-duty, breaking the law for bribe money."
Shepard gave her one more chance, despite knowing with near certainty that Stirling wasn't going to take it. "I have a mission to complete. I did what I had to do."
A blue barrier encased Stirling. "I don't care."
Before Stirling could release a throw, Liara tagged her with a warp, briefly staggering the Sergeant and tearing apart her biotic barrier. Shepard snapped her arm forward, releasing a powerful throw from her fingertips. It caught Stirling full force, cracking her skull and breaking her neck in one shot. Her body flopped to the floor with a sickening thump.
Garrus cut down two men with deadly accurate fire from his assault rifle. The inferno rounds he'd loaded into his weapon burned through their armor as if it wasn't even there. They fell to the floor screaming, clutching at their searing wounds. Another guard tried to make a break for it, but Liara lifted him off the ground and emptied her pistol into him as he flailed about helplessly.
"More on the lower floor," said Garrus as he headed for the stairwell.
Shepard beat him to the punch. She vaulted over the railing, using her biotics to cushion her landing on the floor below. Before the confused guards could open fire, she hurled a powerful singularity into their midst. The spinning vortex of biotic energy sucked in the guards, nearly all the office furniture on the lower floor, the wall hangings—even chunks of plaster and carpet. It was perhaps a little more powerful than she'd planned.
The helpless ERCS guards caught in the vortex were being torn apart. Arms, legs, and spinal columns snapping under the strain of the intense gravitational force. Their screams echoed across the office floor. For a brief moment Shepard worried that the singularity had gotten away from her and was going to gobble up the entire office. Fortunately, the accumulation of objects diffused the heart of the singularity, overloading it with mass, and causing it to dissipate into a blinding blue nova, and finally into a shower of sparks.
"By the goddess!" said Liara. "Shepard, you really must be more careful."
"Spirits, what kind of implants are they sticking into humans these days?" wondered Garrus.
"All right, all right, easy," said Shepard. "I just got a little excited."
Garrus cleared his throat. "Yea, I guess. So, we need to get this data to Qui'in. When are we supposed to meet him?"
"Twelve hours from now," said Shepard. "He'll be laying low until then. That gives us plenty of time to grab a meal and some shuteye. I, for one, haven't had much sleep the past few days—not since Virmire."
"Well, let's get back to the Normandy, then," said Garrus. "I could stand to hit the rack myself."
"I actually booked a hotel suite here in the plaza," said Shepard. "It has a private hot water therapy pool."
Garrus cringed. "Ugh, I'll never understand your species, Shepard. Back in ancient times on my home world, we'd use tubs of scalding water to torture our enemies, but you humans do it to yourselves, willingly, and you seem to derive pleasure from it, even more than Asari. It's damn peculiar if you ask me."
Shepard snickered. "This Turian aversion to water is curious, Garrus. Ever heard of a bird bath?"
Garrus held up his hand. "Stop right there. I just don't want to know."
They took the elevator down. Shepard thought about it briefly, then spoke up.
"So, up for some wine and a little hot water time, Liara?" she asked.
Liara scowled. "Shepard, you need to stop pressing. We already talked about this. I care about you a great deal, but we can't focus on us right now, especially not while I'm thinking about what I'm going to say to my mother. I'm going back to the ship with Garrus. Perhaps you should enjoy your alone time. Use it to still yourself."
Shepard bit her lip.
Garrus shuffled his feet. "Damn, and I thought it was cold outside the plaza."
The elevator doors opened, revealing a woman waiting on the other side. It was Anoleis's secretary, Gianna Parasini. Shepard was never so grateful for an impromptu visit from a stranger, especially one she found so fetching. Gianna wore a tight, fuchsia business suit with an attached skirt. The entire ensemble fit her figure like a glove. It was just the type of distraction Shepard needed at the moment.
Parasini looked nervous. "Commander, there've been reports of noise from the Synthetics Insights Office. Would you know anything about it?"
Shepard shot a smile at the secretary. "Probably Anoleis's thugs
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