10th Chapter

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" My grandchildren are growing up so fast. I feel so proud when I look at them." Handan Sultana said as she wanted to see her grandchildren in her chambers.

She took Mehmed in her hands while Gevherhan was peacefully sleeping in her crib.

" They are growing up really fast, Sultana. They are almost one year old and I feel like I gave birth to them yesterday." I said to Handan and smiled.

" Mehmed really looks alike like my lion Ahmed. They are so similiar. Hopefully one day he will grow to be brave like his father." Handan said while she was holding Mehmed in his hands.

" That is my biggest wish, Sultana." I said and smiled to her. I had good relationship with Handan and that was all I need because I didn't want her to send another concubines to my love Ahmed.

" Do you take enough care of yourself? I want you to be fine and healthy while you are pregnant." Handans said and looked at my pregnant belly.

" Don't worry, Sultana. I do whatever is needed. A little Şehzade or Sultana will come to us really soon." I said as I touched my belly and couldn't wait for the day Mehmed and Gevherhan finally meet their brother and sister.

" We can finally live peacefully when Safiye Sultana was sent to the Old Palace. I hope she will stay there." Handan said and smiled happily. She always hated Safiye and obviously she was happy because of this.

Ahmed banished Safiye to the Old Palace because she was trying to mix in his state jobs too much.

" It is weird for me Safiye Sultana is so silent in last time, she has done nothing. She obviously has some plan which will shake the whole palace." I said to her as I was kinda afraid what Safiye might to now.

" We will see, only thing I hope is that Ahmed won't forgive her and call her back to the Palace. She tries to manipulate over him a lot." Handan said and sighed.

" Hopefully he won't, but what scares me is that I heard Kosem Hatun visits her often in Old Palace." I said to Handan on purpose what I heard from Bulbul.

" Kosem lost all attention and power she got from Ahmed because of you, and that's why she needs Safiye back here. You should take care because I believe Kosem would do something to harm you." Handan said to me.

" I will always take care of that, I won't allow her to come close to me or my children." I said to her.

At that moment, someone knocked on the doors and Handan let them in. Mahfiruze came inside with Osman in her hands. She bowed to Handan, and then measured me from head to toe.

"  Sultana, I thought you maybe would like to see your grandson Osman. As you know, he is also your grandson and he is the eldest one, he is heir to the throne. And you only visit Mehmed and Gevherhan, you never care for my Osman." Mahfiruz said and acted sadly in front of Handan who still held Mehmed in her hands.

" Mahfiruz, watch out for your words. Osman is my grandson and I love him equally as all my grandchildren. You shouldn't talk about the heirs to the throne while my son Ahmed is on the throne, I won't allow you to do it." Handan said seriously to her and took Osman in her hands.

She gave Mehmed to me and I hold him in my hands, because he didn't want to sleep a lot like his sister Gevherhan did. Gevherhan loved to sleep so much and she was so peaceful while she was sleeping, but if we would wake her up, she couldn't stop crying.

At that moment Haci-aga came inside and gave the letter to Handan Sultana. She started reading it and she has huge smile on her face while she was reading that. She wanted to put it on her table, but it slipped and went into Gevherhan's crib, what she couldn't see.

After I returned to my chambers I went to sit on my sofa and relax. Kalika came inside and took Gevherhan in her hands who started crying because she woke up.

" Sultana, look, a letter is inside Gevherhan Sultana's crib." Kalika said and took the letter which she gave me. It was letter Handan recieved.

Beautiful Handan Sultana,
You have no idea how my days are empty when I don't see your beautiful smile, which lights up my world. You have no idea how desperate I am when I can't hear your beautiful laugh, when I can't see your beautiful eyes looking at me. My heart beats only for you and no one can stole it from you.
Slave of your heart Derviş only waits for the day he will be able to see you.

" Sultana, what it is written in the letter?" Kalika asked me curiously while she was trying to make Gevherhan to stop crying.

"Derviş and Handan have some secret relationship." I said to her as I hid the letter to make sure no one else will be able to find it sometimes.

" Derviş-paşa, Grand Vizier?" Kalika asked me shocked when she heard what I have said to her.

" Excatly." I said to her as I was shocked with what I have read in the letter.

How could Ottoman Valide Sultana have a secret relationship with Grand Vizier? If Sultan Ahmed would onlx know for this, he would punish her so much.

But I wouldn't show this to Ahmed. Valide Handan Sultana appericated me and she never has done anything bad to me. But for my safety, I must keep this letter to me, because no one knows how people can change and what if Handan wants to do something bad to me, then I will always have something against her.

I walked to the Harem where I saw Kosem sitting with all the girls from Harem in circle and talking to them. When they saw me, all of the girls bowed but Kosem didn't. She just came and walked closer to me with a bitchy face.

" Your end will come really soon, Mahnaz. You still even have no idea of that, but I am here to inform you. You should keep your eye on your children, because you could easily stay without them." Kosem said and talked directly to me in my face.

" I am not afraid of your threats, Kosem. I can't help you to deal with your jealousy that you lot all of the attention Sultan used to give you." I said and all girls in the harem started laughing at Kosem who couldn't stand my words anymore.

" Sultan will return his attention to me, you shouldn't even worry about it." Kosem said proudly to me.

" You can only dream about it, he abandoned you for a lot of time." I said to her with a smirk on my face.

" He will banish you when he hears about your love Giorgio from Venice." Kosem said and I felt like someone stabbed me with a knife inside my heart.

How did she know about Giorgio who was love of my life when I lived in Venice and I wanted to do whatever is needed to become his wife.

" Kosem, watch for your words." I said to her angrily. If Ahmed would only hear about Giorgio he would send me far away from Palace and separate me from my children.

" Come with me and you will see it." Kosem said and started walking with me. I had no else than to follow her to see where she has found of Giorgio.

We came to the Terrace in Harem where from we could look all the Gardens of Topkapi Palace.

I saw a man standing there waiting for someone and I immediatley recognised it was Giorgio.

" You will go and tell to Sultan that he is your ex love and that you still love him. You will ask Sultan to take you out of the Palace and send you away to find your happiness with Giorgio, or I will do it." Kosem said and raised her head prouldy.

" Kosem, you can't order those things to me. Sultan won't know about this." I said to her as I couldn't do this. I couldn’t lose Ahmed and his love for someone that has been my past.

" Then I will do it." Kosem said and started walking to Sultan's chambers.

I had no way to stop her from doing it. I knew Kosem would do what she wants. I ran closer to her.

I saw a vase standing next to me. I knew I can't become murderer, but I couldn't lose Ahmed now. I couldn’t lose him because of Kosem.

I took the vase and broken it into Kosem's head who fell down on the floor and blood was everywhere around her.

Just at the moment I have done it, I threw the vase out of my hands and I realised that I killed Kosem in this moment.

Fear got all over me what if Ahmed would know that I killed one of his favourites just to protect myself and stay with him.

I ran away and went into my chambers as sooner as I could. I came inside and I started shaking from the fear what is going to happen now.

I killed Kosem, just to save myself and save Ahmed's love towards me. I became who I never wanted to be. I would never have heart to do something like this.

" Mahnaz Sultana, are you fine?" Kalika and Aybige saw something is not fine with me and ran to me to see what it is.

" Giorgio... He is here... I... I killed Kosem..." I barely could say to them as I couldn't catch my breath anymore from fear.

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