Chapter 3 - Part 1

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Taylor

Jordan was sitting on her bed with her arms crossed over her chest as she watched me enter the room.

"I know. I have some explaining to do—" I began, but she cut me off with the wave of her hand.

"I warned you about him. I told you that if you got involved with him he'd break your heart," she said, her tone getting more and more upset. "I'm not trying to tell you how to live your life; I just don't want to have to pick up the pieces when he's done with you."

My eyes softened at my roommate. I understood why she was so upset with me, and I loved that she cared.

"Look, I'm sorry I lied to you," I apologized. "I shouldn't have. But the truth is, nothing happened with him."

"Then why did he show up here looking for you?" she asked, her eyes questioning.

"Well..."

In truth, it was complicated.

"He thinks someone spiked my drink last night," I started. Jordan's eyes widened, and she shot up.

"Someone spiked your drink!" she shrieked. I grabbed her by both of her arms to try and calm her down. She was visibly upset at the thought that someone had tried to do that to me.

"I have no proof someone did that. It's just that I didn't drink that much and Sin said I could barely stand."

"You said you lost your virginity last night," she began and swallowed. "Did someone rape you?"

"No," I answered, shaking my head for extra emphasis.

"Sin is the reason nothing happened to me. He saw I was out of it, so he babysat me for the night."

Jordan looked at me like I'd grown another head.

"He babysat you," she repeated, hoping they would make more sense to her, but his actions clearly didn't coincide with the person she knew.

"I didn't remember anything from the time that you left, and when I woke up, I was in Sin's bed dressed in my underwear. That's why I thought something had happened between us, and I left before he woke up," I started to explain as I released her arms and rubbed my forehead. I was still feeling the effects of my 'hangover.'

"Why were you in your underwear?" she asked suspiciously.

"No, it wasn't like that. He said I tried to take advantage of him," I admitted, feeling a blush tinge my cheeks. I'd felt that attraction for him across the room the first time I'd ever laid eyes on him, so I didn't doubt that given the opportunity I would have tried something.

"Well I never," she murmured and sat down on her bed. It was like I'd told her Santa was real. I gave her a moment for her to wrap her mind around the thought.

"It's just he's normally the one that girls need protecting from. It just doesn't make sense that he looked after you." She was trying to explain why it was so hard to believe.

I shrugged. It was what it was, and there was no point trying to figure it out.

"I kinda feel bad for being openly hostile toward him," she muttered as she raised her eyes to mine.

"It's fine. I don't think it bothered him," I replied. Then her face changed from sympathetic to angry.

"I told you not to take a drink from someone you don't know," she lectured. It felt like I was getting a talking to from a parent and not just a friend.

"I can't remember who gave me the drink," I said. Most people, by college, would know the dos and don'ts of going to parties and dealing with alcohol. I'd missed out on it, and I must have forgotten about Jordan's warning.

I didn't want to think of what might have happened if Sin hadn't seen me. I took a deep breath of guilt and fear and released it. There was no going back and changing it. I just had to learn from my mistakes and make sure I didn't repeat them.

"I knew I shouldn't have left you," she mumbled to me as she stood up and gave me a hug.

"It wasn't your fault, I'm a big girl," I replied as I hugged her back. She pulled away slightly and looked at me with a serious face.

"But that's the thing. You might look like a big girl, but you lack the experience that girls our age have," she said.

She was right, but this was the whole purpose of going out and experiencing all the things that life had to offer, even if some of those things were bad. I wasn't going to be scared to do the things I wanted to because I feared the bad that could happen.

"I know that you think Sin is a good guy because of what he did last night, but one good deed in among all the bad ones doesn't mean he's any less dangerous," she informed me, watching me closely to see my reaction.

"I know."

She was just telling me this because she was worried I would think he was a good guy, but I already knew that he was dangerous. If I allowed him anywhere near my heart, he would break it, and I didn't need Jordan to tell me that.

"Okay, lecture over," she announced. "Let's go and get some lunch."

"Sure."

We left the dorm and went to the cafeteria.

Later, when I got back, I realized I'd left my phone behind again. I glanced down at the screen and saw twenty missed calls from my brother, Connor. I let out a sigh before I dialed his number. I was preparing for the inevitable lecture that I was going to get when he answered on the second ring.

"Where have you been? I've been going out of my mind with worry," he lectured me in a worried tone. He'd had time to work himself up.

I rolled my eyes before I answered.

"I'm fine. I just forgot my phone behind when I went to get some something to eat," I explained to him.

"You left it behind! What if you'd needed to call for help and you didn't have your phone?" he continued in an angry tone. I bit my lip to stop myself from telling him to quit being so dramatic.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled, knowing there was no use trying to argue with him. As much as I wanted to break free from his hold, I understood why he was so protective, so I tried to put up with it. It was frustrating at times, but I knew he was doing it out of love.

I loved my brotherly dearly—he was the only family I still had left—but his overprotectiveness was suffocating me. If he had his way, he'd have me under lock and key.

"If you're going to be irresponsible I'll hire someone to watch you," he threatened. He was starting to pull out the big guns. When I'd first made the decision to go to college, he'd fought me on it. After months of arguing about it, he'd finally conceded, but he'd told me that if at any time he felt that I wasn't careful he'd hire a bodyguard to keep me safe. To an outsider, it could look overdramatic, but if you knew the truth you'd understand why he was the way he was. As much as I hated it, I understood.

"Please don't. I promise not to forget my phone again," I said, trying to reason with him. There was no way I wanted someone following me around the college. It would attract attention that I didn't want and I wanted to have a normal college experience—and normal didn't include a bodyguard.

If he knew what happened last night, he'd been on the first plane here to take me home. But home was his house, not mine, and I wanted to make my own way in life. This was my chance, and I wasn't going to let him ruin it. I was determined to be able to make my own decisions even if they led to a few mistakes in the process. He let out a big sigh, and there were a few moments of silence.

"You know I do this because I love you," he explained, sounding like he'd managed to calm down a bit.

"Yeah, I know. I love you too," I replied, sitting down on my bed and leaning against the wall as I waited for him to say more.

He worried so much. I wondered if all the stress was going to put him into an early grave one day.

"So how are things going?" he asked, trying to make conversation. He phoned me every day to check on me.

"Good."

There was no way I could tell him what happened last night, or he'd show up and drag me back home.

"You okay with the workload?" he asked.

I began to fidget with the end of the blanket that covered my bed. The stitching was coming undone.

"Yeah, so far so good," I said. I was so glad to be out from under his protective presence that college and all the studying was easier than dealing with him.

I know it was horrible to think that, but it was the truth. Despite the fact that I knew his protectiveness came from the fact that he loved me and was scared to lose me, it was suffocating. He'd thought he'd nearly lost me once, and that fear pushed him to take every precaution he could to ensure my safety.

"I've got to go. I've got a meeting," he told me. "Please keep your phone on you."

"I will."

"I love you," he said. He said it to me every time we talked. I think it was those three words that people regretted not uttering for the last time to a loved one that they had lost.

"I love you too."

The call ended, and I dropped my phone onto my bed. I let out a sigh as I leaned my head back against the wall and closed my eyes for a moment.

"Was it that rough?" Jordan asked.

She'd been so quiet I'd forgotten she was in the room with me. I opened my eyes and found her sitting on her bed, crossed-legged with a book on her lap.

"Yes, but it was my fault. I shouldn't have forgotten my phone," I said, rubbing my forehead. I was still feeling a little fragile and, after the conversation I just had, I could feel another headache starting up.

I'd told her about my overprotective brother, but I had never told her why he was so overprotective. It wasn't something I liked to talk about, and she understood that. The problem with telling people about it was the sympathetic looks, and I just couldn't stand those anymore. This was my chance to start over, doing what I wanted, making my own mistakes without my past following me every step of the way.

For the rest of the day, I put my homework away and lay on my bed with a book, trying to get my mind off a hot bad-boy who made my stomach flutter every time I saw him.


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