Today is the day.

I, Sage Forest Rhodes, an 18-year-old boy with limited girl experience, am going on a date. Hold the applause, folks, because I'm sure I'll screw it up somehow. But I get an A for effort.

Checking myself in the mirror, I flatten out my polaroid embroidered button up. I'll change before the date tonight. I just feel like I should look good. It will limit the chances of her changing her mind.

Wandering down to the kitchen, I find my older sister drinking coffee. "Say cheese." I snap a pic as she freezes. "Ashton is going to love this."

"Send it and I'll kill you." She warns, taking a sip.

"Thanks, but I have plans tonight." I pop a waffle into the toaster. Death is not allowed.

"Oh, you do now?"

Never mind, death might be a good idea. "Did–Did I not tell you?"

"No, not that I can recall." Grinning, my sister hops on the counter. "Tell me, brother, what are your plans?"

"Well, you see...." I gnaw on my lip. Just rip the band-aid off. "I have a date."

The look on her face would be comical if we weren't talking about my dating life. "Come again?"

Really? "I have a date tonight."

"A date?" She tests the word. "Like pick a girl up, take her out to dinner, all that nice stuff." Well, I've only dated one girl, but I believe that's how it goes.

"Yeah, um, I just figured it was time I start trying to enjoy high school. Wes hooked me up with a girl that's not crazy, so I figured why not." Scarlett blinks and I panic. "Never mind, it's stupid."

"No!" She keeps me in place. "It's sudden but not stupid. Do I know her? Where are you taking her?"

"It's Freya Block and I'm thinking Olive Garden." Who doesn't love breadsticks? Her smiles falls, oh-no. "What's that face for?"

"Nothing." She assures me. "I was just expecting someone else."

"Like who?" I'm starting with a shiny clean slate.

"Never mind. So, a date?"

"It's just casual." I say, trying to pop my food out before she asks anything else.

She clears her throat. "Are you going to be doing other casual things?"

"Jesus, Scarlett." We are not discussing sex. I get it. She's like my mom and stuff. We share secrets. We gossip. I love my relationship with my sister. However, there is no way in hell, we are discussing this. "Can we not do this?"

I'd much rather throw myself in front of a moving bus and I'm scared of death. Ask my therapist.

Just when I think I'm in the clear, she sets her mug down. "Well, be a gentleman and all that important shit." She makes a run for the door before looking back. "There are condoms in my nightstand."

I throw my waffle at her. "Scarlett!"

I didn't need to know that. It's hard to accept the fact my best friend sleeps with my sister. I do not need to be offered their protection.

Staring at my ruined breakfast, I contemplate running away from home. Why can't my family be normal?

*****

Sitting down at our lunch table, I tear into my food. Left over pizza makes a good Friday even better. Before I can enjoy it, Graham taps my shoulder.

"Coming Home is coming up."

"I know." I assure him. "I've already started posting the donation link and got people to spread the word. You should be pleased to know my large following is coming in handy."

"Good, because it's coming up and–"

"And it will be a major success and when it's all over you'll have my pretty face to thank." I wink. The link was posted yesterday, and I've already raised over a thousand dollars. The people the that follow me might be stalkers, but they're loyal stalkers. "Now, can I eat?"

"Go for it, asshole." He goes back to his seat.

Thank you. Halfway through my second slice, I notice Maggie grinning at me.

"What?" I ask through a mouth full of food, not liking that gleam in her eye.

"Are you excited for tonight?"

Swallowing, I nod. "Yeah, I guess."

"You better be." Wes points a finger at me. "I created a spread sheet and everything to pick a date for you."

"Why?"

"Because I got to save the good ones for myself." He winks as Chloe punches him. "But you don't deserve a psycho."

"And yet, I get no girls." Graham sighs.

I don't even know how to properly respond to that. I feel like a thanks is demeaning to the female population but I do appreciate the effort.

"Do you need any advice?" Maggie asks, pulling me away from the weirder side of our table.

"Mags, I'm not a lost cause." I laugh. "I've been on a date before."

"This is different." She blinks. "You should prepare."

"I know how to wow a girl." I assure her. "Believe it or not, I kept Ella pretty happy for a while."

"Well, we want to do better than that." She states. "I never liked her anyways."

Oh, I did not see that coming.

"Jesus, Mags." Zayne pulls her back.

"Sorry." She blushes, realizing now how bad that sounds. "But it's true."

"Maggie, we're supposed to be building his confidence. Not destroying it." Wes shakes his head.

"It's fine." I turn to her. "What advice do you got?"

"Don't wear too much cologne." She wrinkles her nose. "It can cause headaches."

"You like my cologne, right?" Zayne asks her and she nods.

"Don't talk about yourself too much or your ex at all." Wes orders. "That's like a guarantee to not get laid."

"Pig." Chloe mutters.

"Do compliment her." Maggie says. "Girls spend time to look good. Appreciate it."

"Got it." Easy. I complimented Ella like every time I saw her.

"Go for subtle touches." Wes throws his arm around Chloe. "The shoulder. The elbow. The arm caresses. The hip. The knee or thigh if things are going well."

She shoves him off of her.

"Don't order anything with garlic." Zayne says. Solid point there.

"Please don't wear a crazy shirt design." Graham begs. "Be fashionable."

No garlic. Compliments. Fashionable. Touching. Processing everything, I nod. "Got it."

"You should be fine, Sage." Maggie smiles. "Be yourself. We love you."

"Even if you aren't, at least you'll get laid." Wes chimes in and I roll my eyes. The joys of being a teenage boy.

*****

Running down the hall after school ends, I come to a stop in front of a row of lockers. "Afternoon, Chlo-bear."

"Hey." She rummages through her books.

"How's it going?" I tap on the metal.

"Good. How about you?" She sounds... perky. Chloe is never perky.

Raising a brow, I decide to tread lightly "Do you want a ride home? I feel like we've barely hung out this week."

"We did our lab report at your house."

"Yeah, but you didn't stay for dinner." I remind her. "You were in and out."

She hums, zipping up her bag and I decide I've had enough. "Look, I guess I miss you."

"You do?" That gets her attention.

"Yeah, it's annoying." I grin and she rolls her eyes. It just makes me feel like I've done something wrong. "We're good, right?"

"We're fine." She finally smiles at me and I believe her.

Closing her locker, we head for the parking lot. Nudging her, I ask, "You got any advice?"

"About what?" She blinks.

"My date." I poke her cheek. "Everyone else offered some but I could use some words of wisdom from my Chlo-bear."

"I'm not exactly equipped in that department." She forces a laugh.

"I want some anyways." I'm not any more qualified than she is.

"Don't force yourself if the date falls flat." She says, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

As we get to the door a voice calls for us to stop. A leggy brunette appears in front of us and I check her out. Maybe I really should thank Wes. "Hey, Freya. Everything okay?"

Please don't cancel.

Resting a hand on my arm, she flashes a blinding smile. "No, I was just letting you how excited I am for tonight."

"I am too. Pick you up at 7, right?"

"Sounds perfect." She squeezes my arm. "I was wondering, what's your favorite color?"

"Dark blue." I say without hesitation. "So dark, it's almost black."

Reaching up on her tiptoes, she pecks my cheek. "See you later."

Watching her saunter off, I hear the door close. Glancing down, I realize Chloe should be next to me. Running through the parking lot, I stop her. "What's wrong?"

"I just remembered I'm seeing my friend tonight." She offers.

"Oh."

"Yeah." She shields her face from the sun as she looks up at me. "I have to go shave and exfoliate and do all the girl shit Maggie loves."

"Well, um, you have fun with that." I say, having no clue how to react.

"You too. Appreciate all the hard work Freya's putting into tonight because I'm sure she's doing the most."

"I will." I mutter as she walks away.

Answering the incoming call on my phone, I cheer up. "Hello, honey."

"I hear you're cheating on me with some hussy. Is that true?" Ashton demands and I shake my head.

"Good to know my sister is gossiping."

"It's not gossiping if she thought I already knew." He snips.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you." Damn drama queen.

"Oh, I forgive you." He sighs like he could ever be mad at me. "How are you feeling about it?"

"Fine?" I wonder. "Why does everyone act like I'm incompetent when it comes to dating?"

"I never said that." He argues. "Just want to make sure you're making good choices."

"This is not turning into a second sex talk." I state, not caring if people can hear me. I can't take another.

"No, just be smart and make sure you don't make a mistake just to prove a point." He reasons with me. "Condom's aren't 100% effective."

"This is coming from the guy whose condom stash I was told to raid." I snort.

"What does that mean?"

"If I should be careful of that fact then so should you." Hypocrite.

"One, I think I'd be a pretty damn good dad." He points out. "Two, mine and Scarlett's potential child will be better than yours and Freya Block's."

"Can you not say her name like that?" I ask.

"Like what?"

"Like the thought of her grosses you out." Scarlett said it the same way and I honestly don't understand why. She's only ever been nice to me.

"I'm sorry. Have fun tonight."

"Thank you, dear." I kiss the phone before hanging up.

Grabbing my keys, I head to my car. I need to get in the zone.

*****

Hours later, I'm standing in front of my mirror in a very boring white button up and jeans. My socks, however, are neon pink in silent retaliation.

"You look good." Scarlett studies me, already dressed for bed. A real wild one, my older sister.

"Thanks."

Reaching up, she ruffles my hair. "The mess is more you."

Snorting, I comb my eyebrows and pull my chain out so it's on display.

"Mind your manners. Be a gentleman. Drop her at the curb if she's a bitch." My sister orders.

Hugging her, I nod. "Yes, ma'am."

Satisfied with her talk, she heads for her room. Going downstairs, I double check to make sure I have everything. "Keys. Phone. Wallet."

Check. Check. Check.

"You're missing something." Sterling says from behind me.

"What?" I run back through my list.

"This." Silver slaps a condom down on the countertop.

"We heard Scar this morning." Sterling admits and I shudder as I have a flashback.

"And we figured her stash was fresher than yours." Silver adds.

"So we grabbed you one."

Picking it up by the corner, I debate bringing it to my sister or throwing it away. "Why would you do this?"

"Because we respect a healthy sex life. Just no kids." Sterling slaps my shoulder.

I need to get a concussion and forget this day ever happened.

"The real question is, do we really believe this is Ashton's size?" Silver says and as I read the label, I throw it across the room.

Gross. Gross. Gross. Definitely received too much information. Wow, I think I need a new best friend.

The twins help themselves to a bag of chips was I try to find my will to live through this conversation.

"What time do you have to leave?" Sterling asks through a mouthful of Dorito's.

Checking my watch, I move for the door. "Now. It's 6:45."

I've timed it perfectly. I'll be at her door three minutes early.

"Dude, it's 6:54." Silver shoves me out the door. "Hurry."

Shit.

*****

After being 10 minutes late picking her up and almost missing our reservation, I pick at the plastic menu covering. "You look beautiful."

Freya smiles, shyly glancing down at her outfit. I want to be nice and she does look good. It just feels like she went over the top. A navy dress that hugs all of her curves and heels that make her scarily close to me in height.

It's different from what I'm used to.

"Thanks, I had extra time to get ready."

"I'm sorry, I read the time wrong." I usually set alarms to ensure I'm not messing up the time.

"It's fine. We're here now." She smiles, glancing around the restaurant. "I don't think I've ever been to Olive Garden voluntarily."

"I love their breadsticks." I admit, taking one from the basket. "I guess I should've asked beforehand."

"It's fine." She flips her hair. "I was just expecting something a little more unique."

I repeat, unlimited breadsticks. Who else does that with bread this good? Small talk is a good idea. "Where do you think you're gonna go to school?"

"University of Tennessee." Freya smiles. That's very... basic. Almost everyone from here goes there.

"Did you apply anywhere else?"

"Oh, of course." She nods. "Alabama, Auburn, Mississippi State, Georgia, Florida, Ole Miss, LSU."

"You just about listed every SEC school." I joke. "What do you want to study?"

"Oh, I don't know." She giggles. "It's not like it matters."

"Um, it sorta does." It's four years of expensive schooling that sets you up for a career.

"Nonsense. I'll go to school. Do an easy major. Find a pretty boy, preferably an athlete, and marry them." She studies the menu.

Wow, that's different. I don't want to judge her, because I really shouldn't, but that sounds so shallow. There are better ways to find a husband than going into debt.

"What about you?" She asks, moving her hair over her shoulder so I have a perfect view of her chest.

After a second too long of looking, I clear my throat. "What about me?"

"Where is the Sage Rhodes going to school?" She leans over the table like I'm sharing some big secret.

"I don't know yet." I admit.

"That's okay. Vanderbilt might have gotten rid of you but I'm sure some team will love you." She grabs my hand, brushing her thumb across my palm.

"That's not what happened." I snap. "I'm the one who left."

"That's fine." She nods her head sympathetically. "I hope you make it."

"Thanks." I relax, ready to forget about this conversation.

"That way I can say I went out with a pro baseball player." She winks and I shove another bread stick in my mouth.

We've managed to make it halfway through our meal without me faking a stomachache and leaving. This has been the worst conversation of my life. Wes told me not to talk too much about myself, but maybe he should've given Freya the same advice.

She talks only about herself.

Not about her future, unless it involves marrying and never working. Not about her little brother. She can't even talk about her favorite holiday without mentioning how hot she looks in red at Christmas time.

I'm sure that's true but I was going for more of learning what her favorite Christmas movie is. Anything to make her sound like a human being.

"Sage, did you hear me?" She trails a nail up my wrist.

"Hm, sorry." I shake my head.

"Who's your escort for Coming Home?" She tilts her head.

"Not sure." I say, coming back to reality. "But I have time."

That's part of the reason I decided to do this. It's a perfect way to meet someone willing to smile pretty for. picture with me.

"It's next Thursday." She says.

"It's the 21st." I correct her. I have it marked down in my calendar and everything. Scarlett would be proud.

"No, it's the 12th, silly." Her nail runs up and down my arm. "Everyone knows that."

"I didn't." Stupid dyslexia. This is why I need someone to proofread everything I do.

"I'll be your escort." She says. "I have the prettiest yellow dress I could wear and I'm sure we'd look perfect together."

Before I can find a way to say no, our server appears. "Check?"

"Please."

*****

Driving Freya home, I'm consumed by one thought. Do I sleep with her?

It's safe to say, after spending an evening with her and getting to know her truly boring she is, I'm ready to dip out. I now know why Ash and Scar were less than pleased with her. Then again, she's absolutely gorgeous. I've suffered through dinner; I should enjoy one part of my evening.

Parking in her driveway, she does a very good job of getting into my personal space. "I had a great time tonight."

"So did I." I lie. Deciding I should just go for it, I kiss her.

Without skipping a beat, she somehow manages to end up in my lap. Pulling back, she whispers in my ear. "My dress isn't the only thing dark blue I'm wearing."

Oh, God. I think I'm going to be sick.

My phone buzzes and I pretend to read it. "My little sister just had an asthma attack. I need to go."

"Oh." She says as I hand over her bag and phone. "But my parents aren't home."

Opening my door, I somehow manage to set her on her feet. "Lock your doors."

Driving off, I search through my car for some gum. I might've remembered to not eat garlic but she sure as hell didn't.

*****

I screamed, not gonna lie.

Poor Sage, but... honestly... are we the mad about it?

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