Ethan's POV

Pain and darkness.

The only two sensations I felt. I was on my millionth bottle of whiskey.I had lost the sense to keep a clear head. It had been a week since Skylar left and it didn't get any better. It was worse. Because she was all I could think about.

Her smile. The way she kissed me. Her eyes when she listened to me. How her hands always softly pressed me closer to her.

And her betrayal.

This is the longest I haven't been at work. I cannot think straight, how could she do this to me? Why did she do this to me? It was hard enough for me to open up to her and this is what I get?

I shook the empty bottle before I smashed it against the wall. I slinked back further down.

"Ethan?" I looked up to find Ace.

"Go away." I said mindlessly flailing my hand.

"Ethan, look at yourself. Get up!" He sounded angry but I couldn't care any less.

He supported me up. "Leave me alone, please." I could hear my slurred speech. He ignored me.

He shoved down an entire pint of water down my throat and it didn't do anything to erase the pain. He laid me on the bed and I instantly closed my eyes. Sleep--something I hadn't gotten for more than an hour a day. I was enveloped by darkness.

--*--

"Jesus Christ!" I exclaimed as I felt a hard throbbing in my head.

"Good , you deserve that." Ace said as he pushed a pill and water towards me."Seriously, binge-drinking is not the solution for all your problems. We're not in college anymore, Carter."

I opened my mouth as he stopped me."Eat this and come down. A girl named Andrea wants to see you."

The secretary. Skylar's secretary.

I made my way downstairs. "Andrea." I nodded solemnly at her, wishing that I looked intimidating enough.

"I'm sorry Mr. Carter, Finn helped me get here. I just wanted to know if Mrs. Carter is well? I know I was supposed to give her that envelope a week ago, but I got caught up in the weekly events and it totally slipped my mind.She hasn't been to work in a week and Mr. Evans is unreachable."She was cowering under my gaze.

A week ago? That means that Skylar didn't know anything about the take over.But the thing that concerned me more was her not being at work.

"Andrea, you're fired. Unless you want me to blacklist you everywhere, it's better if you leave." I heard a sob but I couldn't care less. She was the primary cause of all this. Without thinking any further, I grabbed my keys and drove down to the one place I expected her to be.I found myself knocking at Ava's door.

"Ethan," Her eyes enlarge at the sight of me, "I know what you're here for. I'm sorry but I'm afraid I can't help you." She started closing the door but I held it.

"Ava, please. I'm desperate. I need to know where she is." 

"Ethan, I'm bound by my word. I cannot tell you. I'm sorry." She closed the door.

Punching the wall once, I came back to my car. Driving around aimlessly for an hour, I found myself near my brother's building. Maybe he could help me--he's close with Skylar.

I made my way up. The way that he talked about her told me only one thing, he was completely oblivious. He had no clue what happened.

"I need to go to the bathroom." I said as I got up. As I reached I heard murmurs from the nearby room, I went closer.

"It worked Bianca. He seems so despaired." Zach's voice travelled, "Yeah, she left. No one knows but you can come back now. I think now is the good time as any to win him over--he's miserable." 

What the fuck.

I banged open the door and punched him straight in the face. "You asshole! What the fuck are you two up to?" I snatched the phone from him but it was already hung up.

Liam ran in looking around, "What the fuck Ethan?" he said as he helped Zach up, who was now bleeding.

"How about you ask your boyfriend?The scheming bastard wanted me to get back with Bianca and leave--" I couldn't say her name ,"Skylar."

None of us could say another word as we heard the clicking of heels in the hallway. Bianca the bitch was here.I moved towards her and she started stepping back.

"What did you do?" I levelled my gaze at her.

"I- "  She tripped but caught herself.

"I was the one who asked Neil to appoint Skylar and he agreed," She shrugged and continued, "I knew how insecure you are. I know how much your career means to you and if someone overshadowed it , you will cross all boundaries."

She had the audacity to come near me and cup my face in her hands, "I knew you'd leave Skylar, she was never good enough for you. It's always been me, Ethan. Choose me." She whispered the last part in my ear and I immediately shoved her away from myself.

"How dare you?" I said in a low voice.

"How dare I? Goddammit Ethan I still fucking love you! I want you back and I could have done anything to make that happen. Even if I had to kill someone."

"Are you fucking crazy?" I took one step ahead but stopped myself.

"For you ?I am!" She shouted.

I pushed past her and made my way outside.

"Ethan, please. I'm right here, forget her! I still love you and I know you do too."

"You're nothing but delusional." I walked out, fuming.

I need to find out where Skylar is.

--*--

I know what I'm about to do is wrong. But I do not have another option, this is my last resort to get the smallest of clue of where Skylar actually is.

I entered into Dr.Martin's office, her therapist.

"Morning, Mr.Carter." I shook her hand.

"Morning Dr. Martin, I hope it wasn't too much trouble to see me on such a short notice."

"No, not at all. Please have a seat."

"I am sorry but I don't have time for that. I just need to know if you have any idea where Skylar is?"

"I'm sorry Mr. Carter, I'm afraid that is not my place to tell you. Whatever information she shared with me I cannot disclose it to you."

"You do understand that I'm her husband?" I said condescendingly.

"Yes I do. And yet she didn't tell you this because of a reason." She replied in the same tone.

"Dr. Martin please  I need to know." I was desperate, I didn't have the restrain in my voice to hide it.

"I apologise again.Now if you'll excuse me, I have an appointment." She went back in, leaving me with nothing helpful.

This was the only place I could've known anything. I'm out of all options. How on earth will I ever find her? I need to see her. I need to.

I have to ask my PI, the only option left.

--*--

I was lying in her bed. It smelled just like her, blueberry and citrus. I miss her presence around the house that she made a home. I miss her twirling around. I miss seeing her working, hunched over on that desk of hers. I miss her. It's getting difficult everyday.

The two weeks that we were together, were unexpectedly the most peaceful and beautiful moments of my life. I don't know if she'll ever forgive me or not but I for sure will never forgive myself for being a dickhead. I should've listened to her. We could've worked through this.This one big misunderstanding and my stupidity drove us apart.

Her walking out and saying she won't came back gives me an unfamiliar ache in my chest. Will I never see her again? I cannot move on. Ever. 

Just then my phone rang.

"Hello, Mr.Carter?" It was the PI.

"Yes. Did you find anything?"

"The only thing I could know is that she is not in the country. She flew out last week but despite trying I'm unable to know her exact location."

 I hung up.

It all seems so hopeless. Feels like all the doors have closed. "How could you disappear like this Skylar?" I say like a madman to no one.

I got up and started searching for a clue, anything that will lead me to her. I opened her last drawer and a journal dropped out. A leather-bound diary.It must be hers. I cannot open it. It's private. But what if something here could help me reaching to her? No, I cannot invade her privacy. 

But I needed her essence, even a little bit of it. Despite my better judgement I opened the diary and started reading an entry which was from 2014 , completely tear stained. It seemed like this has been read over and over. It was from the day her mother died. She was in shock.As I went through the line , it almost brought me to tears.

The next entry was from a few months ago. It's from the night we were in Hawaii , she mentioned how we didn't know each other but at the same time she was happy to be at the helm of her company. I remember that day, it was extraordinary.

I skimmed through the next few entries only to topple across the last one.

"Ethan is someone with whom I've been physically and emotionally comfortable with in a long time"

I could feel the ache in my chest , it was back. What have I done? Here she was trying to fulfil my dreams and I like a fool blamed her for destroying them. I want her back, no, I need her back. 

I love her.

I love her. I cannot believe this, but I fucking love her. And I want to tell her this by myself.

 I need to see her. I need to touch her. I need to speak to her. I want to hear her melodic voice. I want to feel her presence near me. I need her.

I need to figure out where she is. I cannot waste another moment.

Then again my phone rang, the elation died down when I saw it wasn't the PI.

"Hey, James." 

"Hey, Ethan! It's a girl! She came a week ago and Sam and I have been wanting to see you and Skylar. She is really excited so I hope you guys can make it."  Hearing the happiness  and excitement in his voice, I cannot say no. I have to go and see them. But how do I tell them Skylar won't be with me?

"Congratulations, James. I assure you I'll be there but Sky is out of country due to some business I'm afraid she cannot make it."

"What are you talking about? Sam already called Skylar, she is coming as well." I felt my heart pumping wildly.But the mere idea of seeing her there accelerated my heartbeat. I would be able to look at her. Talk to her. Skylar would be there, "Oh that's great, I'll be there in two days then."

"Sure thing, we'll be waiting for you."

I cannot believe it. I get to meet Skylar. My Skylar. I know it was selfish of me to rejoice at the news of seeing her rather than Sam and James being blessed with a girl. But I couldn't do anything, my emotions were not in my control. There was only a single though looming in my head apart from the happiness to finally meet her.

Will she forgive me?