"Can't you stay a little longer?" Ashley whined.

I shook my head, we went through this every time. I know what you're thinking, I'm fucked up; and I know I am but shit wasn't that easy to break off. I tried, I really did and shit went left. She was crying, hitting me, and pissed that I was breaking it off to try and work shit out with Aria. And I felt her anger, her pain and her confusion in it all. Because all in all, I wanted both of them and I told her that. But I knew I couldn't have both, but I wanted my daughter to grow up with both of her parents in the house if I could make it possible and I felt like I had to explore this relationship with Aria if it had me questioning leaving Ashley to begin with.

One thing led to another after the argument and we ended up in bed having sex, after that I had nothing to do with her for about a month. But then she called me crying one day begging me to come over because she needed someone to talk to and I was the only person she felt like she could really talk to, and that night is what had us here at the moment. Plenty of times I wish I wouldn't have went.

She knows about Aria, it's a not a secret. A part of her doesn't care but I know in another sense it's eating her up. Shit, it was eating me up. I needed to end it, I just couldn't. Ashley made it hard, and it was no telling what she would do. That's what scared me the most. I vowed I wouldn't do shit like this again because I wanted to be a better example for Ava, but yet I put myself in this situation and I had no one to blame but myself, I planned to end it with Ashley though, but I feel like I had to make her feel like the choice was hers. That's the only way this was going to work without it being messy as hell, at least that's what I hoped.

"You know I can't." I responded as I started to get dressed. She rolled her eyes, hating any time she felt like I was leaving her to go be with Aria. It was eleven at night and well past the time I should have been here seeing as how I shouldn't have been here at all. "I'm over you not being able to stay the night." She let out.

"You know the situation Ashley." I pulled my shirt over my head before connecting eyes with her, I could see the hurt in them. "I have to go." I left out as she didn't speak another word. I hated what I was doing to Aria, and I hated what I was doing to Ashley.

I got in my car speeding off towards Aria and I's place, calling Chris in the process. "Yo!" he answered. "My boy, what you up to?" I questioned.

"Not shit, chillin' at the house. What's good?"

"I was with you tonight."

He chuckled, "boy you ain't shit, but I got you. Jodie told me how you got that nigga off guard in front of Aria." I shook my head knowing exactly what he was talking about. "Don't get yourself caught up now."

"Trying not to. But Imma get at you."

"Alright, bet." As we hung up I pulled into our parking lot, Ashley only stayed about five minutes from where we stayed so it was never a long drive. I deleted Ashley from my messages and my call log as I walked in. I was surprised to see it was pitch black, I walked in the room turning on the light seeing an empty room. It was late as hell for Aria to still be out with Ava. I shook my head deciding to give her time until I got in the shower before calling her.

I ran the shower water as I stripped down as my phone started ringing. I looked at the caller ID seeing Ashley calling, however I didn't have her name saved as Ashley. I shook my head as I let it go to voicemail and hopped in the shower. Once I got out I brushed my teeth then walked into the room seeing Aria tie her hair up and Ava sleep. She turned looking at me, "Hey." I walked over to her wrapping my arms around her body, kissing the side of her face. I loved this girl and there was no doubt about that shit. She was who I wanted to be with. She smiled, closing her eyes before turning around to face me looking me in my eyes like she was trying to read my soul. I smiled as she smiled back, pecking me on my lips. "How was your day?" she asked.

I sighed as I let her go, going to grab some boxers out of my drawer. "It was straight, how was yours?"

She went over to the bed sitting down, "it was straight too."

"Where you coming from?" I asked as I stepped into my boxers.

"Mink's," she started as she pulled the covers back, "lost track of time. Surprised you didn't hit my phone."

I chuckled, "I said I was going to give you until after I got out the shower. But when I got out you were here."

She laughed as she laid down. I hit the light and got in laying down beside her getting as close to her as I could as I wrapped my arms around her. "I missed you," I whispered into the crook of her neck, and I did. I felt like ever since we started living together we saw less of one another.

"I missed you too," she whispered back. I couldn't keep living this double life. I had to stop this shit.

---

"What's good boy?" Jodie asked as he dapped me up. Me and the boys were meeting up just to catch up and shit, this last year of college had us all spread out. No sooner than us sitting down Chris walked in, eyes all over the waitress who had just stopped at our table. I shook my head chuckling as he slid in the booth quickly trying to get a look at her face as disappointment set in on his. We ordered some beers and then she was gone. "I can't stand a butta head yo. Her body look too good for all that shit."

Jodie and I laughed as Chris jumped right into questioning, "but my nigga, you," he started as he pointed at me, "you on some crazy wild shit."

I shook my head as my smile dropped, when I say nothing, I mean nothing made me happy about the situation I was in. I was over that hurting people shit and I knew somebody was going to get hurt, if not everybody - myself included.

"Yeah, I don't even fuck with that shit." Jodie added in as the waitress came back to the table with some beers. "Can I get y'all anything else?" she asked with a smile. Chris waved her off, "we good right now, give us like fifteen." She nodded before leaving the table.

I sighed, "I'm not a fan of the shit either. But Ashley don't make this shit easy. Like I do care about the girl. But I just want Aria more. Like I can see myself marrying her and realistically, I don't see that with Ashley, not no more. At one point I did but with this shit now, nahh." I shook my head to further emphasize my point as I picked my beer to take a sip.

"Then end it with Ashley," Jodie said matter-of-factly as he picked up his beer. "I don't see what the issue is."

"Shit ain't that easy Jo, her feelings involved and ain't no telling what she gon' do. You know Ashley can be crazy as fuck."

"My nigga, everybody feelings involved. Ain't no nice way to go about it. End it before she let Aria know or Aria find out about her. That shit is going to be worse because then both of them are going to be hurt, opposed to just one. You made this shit messy yo."

"Man, shit. I say keep fucking both of them until shit hit the fan." Chris smiled as he leaned back taking a swig of his beer.

"Listen to that dumb ass if you want to. If you ain't give a fuck about these girls then yeah, shit fuck it. Keep doing what you doing. But you claim you care and you saying you want to spend forever with one of them, then you have to tighten up."

I nodded my head, "I know. I just need time."

Jodie chuckled, "time going to turn into turmoil. Shit you know I know, I've had my fair share of bullshit."

I chuckled, "yeah, but enough about that shit, what's new with y'all?"

"Aye, on some real shit yo. Y'all think I can fuck Mink?" Chris blurted out random as fuck.

Jodie and I both turned and looked at him like he was stupid, "you fucked Kennedy, highly fucking doubt it." I responded as I picked up my beer.

He waved my comment off, "man I've fucked plenty of friends, shit, we all have" he emphasized as he pointed to both Jodie and I. "I'm just saying, Mink been looking good as fuck and I ain't fucked with Kennedy since like last year."

"Nah bruh, it ain't happening." Jodie held seriousness to his tone as he shook his head.

I nodded my head, "yeah, my nigga. Let that shit go. That's one it won't happen with. Loyalty is her middle name." I fucked with Mink, but I knew she had her reservations about me and she made that known.

Chris kissed his teeth, "Man, I think imma try my luck. I feel like y'all doubting me."

"We trying to save your ass from some embarrassment. Try her in public if you want to, she gon' blast you." I replied.

Jodie and I chuckled as he added in, "hell yeah, her mouth is ridiculous."

Chris waved it off not caring. "You ain't learn shit after catching that STD did you? Still running after every damn girl." Jodie commented.

I got wide eyed as I tried to suppress my laugh, "oh that's cool Jodie, real funny. Man that shit was curable, ain't got it no more so shut the fuck up."

Jodie put his hands up, "I'm just saying, that shit should tell you to slow the fuck down."

"Man, it's my last year of college, fuck you mean slow down? It taught me to always wrap it up and never trust what come out these bitches mouth."

Jodie and I both shook our head, "you got it man."

"Man y'all use to be out here on the same shit, and Jodie you were worse than me." Chris continued.

"Well aware," Jodie answered as he took a swig of his beer. "You right and that shit old. I've fucked so many bitches I lost count. I'm just saying, you ain't tired of that shit?"

"So you really tired of it?" He asked Jodie, zoned in on him.

Jodie snickered, "I mean, you gon' miss it sometimes, but honestly I'm good with fucking one girl or two. I don't need to hit twenty different bitches every month."

"See one girl or two. Same shit." Chris picked up his beer as he waved Jodie off.

"I say that shit cause I ain't in no relationship though, I'm not committed to shit. So if I want to fuck more than one girl I can, but I ain't got to be out here trying to fuck everybody, like you still on. Shit is different."

"Jodie that's cause you fucked everybody, ain't nobody new out here for you to fuck." Chris threw out. I laughed not being able to hold it in.

Jodie nodded his head, slight smile on his face as he picked up his beer again. "Whatever yo," he smiled. Chris and I were still cracking up as we watched Jodie's smile drop as his eyes landed on someone, we both stopped, turning to see who he was looking at seeing the one and only Kira, that one girl that Jodie felt like got away.

Chris and I looked at each other wondering what Jodie was going to do. Whatever it was, this shit was about to be interesting.