"Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."

-Alfred Lord Tennyson.
* * *

Valeria

I went back home immediately after they finished dinner yesterday. The drive takes an hour from their house to mine. If Mrs. González finds out that my house is not close, she will kill me, mostly because I lied to her and told her that it only takes five minutes to reach my house. I only lied because at first I thought she wouldn't employ me if I lived far away, and I didn't tell her later because I didn't want her to let her driver drive me from and to her house.

Trust me, she's an angel and she would do that, so I don't want to trouble her or her driver. Lorenzo was right, I am just a maid, anyways.

I wake up earlier than I usually do and take a shower. My hair is greasy and I would be embarrassed to go out with it.

When I finish, I put on the hair cream that Sofia gave me last month and apply it on my ends. This cream helps my frizzy hair a lot.

I then wear my clothes, put my uniform in my bag, and walk out of my room.

I spot my mother and father sitting on tliving room couchom, watching TV. My mother's red hair looks messy and her makeup is still on her face from last night because her blue winged eyeliner is still on and messy.

"I am leaving," I say, grabbing their attention.

"When is the salary?" My mother asks. My father lowers his face, avoiding looking into my eyes.

"In a few days," I reply.

"So, when?" She asks again.

"After tomorrow."

"Great. Give it all to me this time. I need to buy some stuff."

"But what about me? I need money to use the bus."

"I don't care! Tell her to get you a driver if they are that rich."

"I can't...please I—"

"That's final, Valeria!"

I leave the house with tears running down my face. Yes, you can say it, I am scared of wn mother. She scares me to death, especially when nothing goes her way. She'd beat me sometimes whenever I say no to something that she demands. That's why I backed down today, I don't have the energy to get any beatings.

I step into the bus, swiping my card against the machine. My current balance is eleven euros. In a few days, it will become 0 and I won't have any extra money to spend. I have three solutions, ask Mrs. Valeria to let her drive to get me, ask her for extra money, or find another night job since I finish at 6. Seeing that I won't likely choose the first two options, I decide on getting a second job.

I am just too shy to ask her for anything, especially when the salary is good enough. I don't think any housekeeper here in Spain gets 1600 Euros. That's a lot compared to what others get. And I couldn't enroll in any university, not only because my mother takes almost all the money, but also because I have no time for it if I keep working. Besides, if I want to enroll in public universities, my major is only found in Barcelona, and I can't even think of leaving my father with my witch of a mother.

I reach the house in 45 minutes due to low traffic. I enter through the kitchen's back door and get changed as usual. When I walk out, I see Lorenzo in the kitchen, looking for something in the fridge.

"Do you need something, sir?" I ask, startling him. He glares at me before saying, "No."

"Well, I will be making breakfast very soon. Would you like me to make you something before?"

"I didn't ask for today's schedule, did I? Also, I already told you that I don't need anything," he rudely replies, slamming the fridge door shut.

Jeez, fine.

I ignore him and start preparing breakfast. When he leaves, I sign in relief because I want to be alone in the kitchen while working, and I'd hate for anyone to stay and distract me, especially him.

I cook some pancakes, scrambled eggs, and waffles. That's what Mrs. Gonzalez wants today.

I set up the table and put everything on it when I finish. I walk to the living room to call everyone when I hear someone shouting. I walk faster to the living room, only to see a man and a woman fighting. I have never seen them before, but looking around as the rest watch them as if they are a movie, tells me that they know them. There's also a second man standing beside Lorenzo whom I have never seen before in this house.

"You are the reason I am in this state!" The girl shouts.

"How am I the reason? Didn't we both do it?" He shouts back, moving his hands in the air in an angry manner.

"You should have put the condom better than that!"

"It's 97% effective, not 100%. You should have known that!"

"I don't care!"

"Enough you two!" Mr. Gonzalez yells, startling them both. "If I hear another word from you two, I swear I'll take out my gun and kill you." Both of them grow silent at his threat, which I know for sure, isn't empty.

It's weird because they have never spoken about the mafia or guns around me until now. Not that they know I heard everything.

"Valera! Hey," Sofia says with widened eyes.

Okay, they know I heard everything.

"Hey, I just wanted to tell you that breakfast is ready."

"Okay, honey. Please add three more plates," Valentina says.

I nod and quickly walk back. They think that I don't know what they do for a living, but I do. I have heard Sofia once talking to her friend in her room about the mafia and how their families are allies of some sort. It was a shock to me back then, but I wasn't afraid just because I know these people well.

Well, I hope I do.

I get the three extra plates with the utensils and head back to the dining room. I place each plate and utensil in front of each guest and turn back to leave, but I am stopped by Valentina.

"Yes, Mrs. Gonzalez?"

"Can you stay the night tomorrow? I have some guests and I need your assistance."

"Yes, of course," I reply with a smile.

"Thanks, honey. If you need me to speak with your parents, let me know."

"It's okay, they won't say anything." 

"Great then! Just bring your stuff and you can stay in one of the guest rooms." 

"Thank you."

I leave with a smile on my face. I have always dreamed of sleeping in one of the rooms of this house. It isn't a dream that I have always wanted like studying at university, but it is something that I have thought about before. 

I walk back to the kitchen and start cleaning up the mess of my cooking. I don't realize that there's a man standing by the door until he approached me and placed his hand above my mouth. 

"Move and I'll kill you."

Fresh tears start falling down as he grabs my arm and forces me to walk in front of him. He opens the bathroom's door and seals my mouth, hands, and legs with a duck tape. I try to scream but nothing came out. 

He takes the keys and locks the door, leaving me inside and on the floor. 

After a few minutes, I hear gunshots. 

The anxiety and fear inside me are the reason I suddenly became dizzy and faint.