Mason Maloney

I was never one to worry too much about what others thought of me. It wasn't that I was extremely confident like my brother, but more like I just didn't think about it. Something had changed in me recently and suddenly I felt like I was being suffocated with insecurity. It might have started when I started getting to know Sam, but I couldn't be too sure. The uncertainty I felt around him made me feel so out of control and I worried what he thought about my every move. I worried that my attraction to him was one sided, even though it didn't seem that way at first.

Sam never replied to my message. I checked my phone the rest of the weekend like a fool and was left unsatisfied. When he came into work on Monday afternoon, I didn't know how to act around him. What we had shared together didn't seem to matter and I feared that if I brought it up, I would seem desperate.

"What are you thinking about?" Sam pulled me from my thoughts, causing me to face him as the two of us leaned against the counter.

"Nothing," I lied.

Sam had a thoughtful expression on his face. "You looked like you were lost in thought."

I shrugged, not knowing what else to say. I didn't want to delve into my thoughts with him, especially when they were about him.

"Anyway," Sam started, clearing his throat. "I was thinking we could hang out this weekend."

What he said caused me to perk up and I was sure he noticed it by the way my posture straightened and how my once sullen expression lifted exceptionally.

"Sure," I answered casually, nodding slowly.

The thought of being alone with Sam was thrilling, yet daunting. It felt as though we were breaking a law and I suppose we kind of were. The thought was exhilarating and nerve-wracking at the same time. Being around Sam caused my nerves to flare, but the added threat of getting caught together was almost overbearing.

"At my place," he trailed. "Alone."

Sam walked closer to me with a teasing smirk on his face. His right hand came in contact with my hip, squeezing it lightly. I gulped at our close proximity as his thumb found its way under my shirt and brushed back and forth on my bare skin.

"Sounds good," I muttered quietly, trying to keep my composure. It was like he knew exactly what he did to me and he was using it to his advantage.

I wished I had the confidence to give him a taste of his own medicine, but when I had no idea where we stood as friends, or more, I couldn't even bare the thought of making a move.

Sam chuckled lightly at my obvious discomfort and removed his hand from my skin, continuing to stand close to me. It felt like I couldn't breathe, yet I still didn't want him to move away from me. We stayed silent for a few moments, looking at each other with blank expressions. I wanted to look away but it was like Sam had paralyzed me and I couldn't look anywhere but him.

"We should start closing up," Sam suddenly said, backing away from me.

I cleared my throat and nodded in agreement, turning my head away from him to hide my flushed skin. Sam walked by me to go count the register while I went out to the front of the store to start putting the chairs on top of the tables.

Sam joined me soon after he finished with the register. He brought out a broom and started sweeping where I had already picked up the chairs. The only sounds that filled the air were the light bang of the chairs as I placed them on the tables and the wispy noise as Sam dragged the broom on the floor. He started to let out a hum which caused me to look over at him.

"What?" he asked when he noticed me looking.

"Nothing," I said quickly with a shrug, turning away from him.

He started humming the tune again, louder this time. I didn't recognize it so I turned to face him again, this time with a confused expression.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" he wondered, holding the broom up straight and leaning on it.

"What the hell are you humming?" I asked, finding my voice. I had been so quiet with him today, but I was starting to feel more like myself.

Sam stared at me with wide eyes, his mouth agape. "You don't know that song?"

I shrugged. "No."

His expression didn't falter. "Mr. Brightside? The Killers?"

I shrugged again, this time with a small, close-lipped smile. Sam shook his head at me and took his phone out of his pocket, muttering something under his breath about me being "unbelievable."

The song started playing and I realized that I vaguely remember hearing it through the walls of my room, coming from Nathan's loud, obnoxious speakers. But I wouldn't mention that to Sam because I knew it would only sour the mood.

"Maybe I have heard it," I admitted.

"I need to school you on music," Sam said seriously. "What do you even listen to? Pop?"

I nodded and Sam let out a groan, causing me to laugh at him.

"Pop music isn't bad, don't be an ass," I said with a wide smile.

"Some of it isn't bad," he corrected, pointing a finger at me.

I rolled my eyes. "That could be said about any genre."

"That could be said about any genre," Sam mimicked me in a mocking tone.

I chuckled and shook my head at him, leaning back against a table. "You're a child."

"At least I have taste," he countered with a scoff and continued sweeping the floor.

I pushed myself away from the table and walked over to him. Sam stopped what he was doing when he saw me standing in front of him. He raised his eyebrows in question.

"I have an idea," I told him. He tilted his head slightly as if telling me to go on. "How about I make a playlist of songs that I like for you to listen to and you make one for me."

Sam pondered on my suggestion for a moment before nodding slowly.

"Sure," he said with a smirk. "Just don't put anything too awful on there."

I couldn't help but shove him in the shoulder in response to his words, causing him to laugh loudly at me. This was the best time to be around Sam, when the two of us felt at ease and comfortable with each other.

Sam started sweeping again and I couldn't keep myself from watching as he mouthed along to the words and swayed slightly to the music that he had playing. He was definitely a sight for sore eyes.

I didn't want to take my eyes off of him.

***

I shivered as I sat on the cold bleachers. It was an unusually cold night for late September in Massachusetts. This was the type of weather that was to be expected in November. I hugged my jacket closer to my body, trying to keep warm.

"I'm freezing my balls off, man," Pete said with chattering teeth, pulling his hood over his head.

I let out a deep breath, causing a cloud of air to form in front of me briefly. My leg bounced up and down, unable to stay still as my body desperately wanted to warm up. Much to my delight, I spotted Bella and Ross ascending the bleachers with cups of hot cocoa in their hands. Pete rejoiced loudly when his eyes fell on them.

"Life savers!" he shouted as our two friends reached us, handing each of us a cup.

My hands instantly burned as I held onto the cup, but I was so cold at that moment that I didn't care. I blew on the steaming beverage before taking a small sip, my tongue immediately blistering at the contact. As the cocoa moved down my throat, my body warmed up in delight.

"I can't believe how cold it is," Bella said as she sat beside me.

Bella had a winter hat sitting atop of her head along with her cozy North-face jacket hugging her tightly while I sat there with a light jacket over my sweatshirt.

"I'm going to freeze to death," I answered her, grabbing my hood and putting it on my head.

"Should've dressed warmer," she retorted sardonically with a knowing smile.

As Bella turned to make conversation with Pete and Ross, I took out my phone and started a message to Sam.

Good luck at your game tonight

Maybe I should have felt guilty for wishing my brother's enemy luck, but I didn't. If I was going to have any sort of relationship with Sam, even just a friendship, then supporting him was something I had to do despite what my brother wanted. There was no reason why I couldn't support both of them simultaneously.

Sam responded quickly.

Thank you. I'll talk to you later.

I smiled at the text before slipping my phone back into my pocket.

The game wasn't going to be starting for another twenty minutes, but it was crucial to get there early enough to find seating for all four of us together. Our town loved football, so the bleachers filled up for every game. Most people have become accustomed to bringing their own chairs and sitting down on the grass.

"Are you in, Mason?" Bella asked, bringing me back from my thoughts.

"What?" I asked confusedly.

She rolled her eyes. "A bunch of people are going to The Orchard tonight for hot cider, you in?" Bella explained.

The Orchard was a neat little restaurant that was on an apple orchard. In the fall, the restaurant had a bunch of apple and pumpkin themed foods and drinks and in October they had a corn maze. It was a favorite for everyone around and it was a few towns over.

"Sure," I answered with a shrug.

Bella turned away from me after hearing my answer and continued her conversation with Ross and Pete. I looked down at the field to see the football players warming up. I instantly found my brother and watched as he threw the ball to Tony, completing the pass perfectly. He looked as calm and cool as ever, superior confidence oozing off of him.

It was obvious that my brother's talent caused nerves to flare in other teams. He knew the game so well and could see through any mistake the other team was making and use it to his advantage. It was part of what made our team so good, not that he was the only part. One of the only teams he didn't shake was the Knights. The Knights and the Warriors were so evenly matched with talent, it was no wonder why they hated each other. They were always each other's hardest game.

I always thought that part of the reason why Nathan hated Sam so much was because Sam was just as good as him at football. Nathan was used to being better than the other team's quarterback because he put in the work, but so did Sam.

I continued to absentmindedly watch Nathan throw the ball, just waiting for the game to finally begin.

***

The Orchard was buzzing with excitement as nearly half of the student body was there celebrating the win. It was warm inside considering the amount of people that were crowded around providing their body heat. We were sat a small table against the wall with a few of Bella's other friends, sipping on hot apple cider and eating desserts.

Bella's friend, Wendy, sat beside me, inching closer to me every so often. She was a nice girl and obviously shy, but she was making it quite evident that she was trying to get my attention. I didn't know what to do about that, so I just contributed to conversation and tried not to make her think that her feelings were reciprocated.

"I'm about to start eating this last piece of pie if no one else claims it," Pete warned with his eyebrows raised, pointing his fork toward the last remaining piece of pie.

"No!" Bella shouted, knocking his fork away with her own. "We all agreed to share it!"

"That's not a big enough piece for seven of us to share, Bella!" he responded, looking at Bella as if she was crazy.

"I won't have any," I interjected, gesturing toward the pie.

They each spared me a glance before going back to glare at each other. I couldn't help but roll my eyes. They were too much sometimes, fighting about the stupidest things.

"I won't either," Ross added, pushing his empty plate toward the center of the table.

Wendy giggled, brushing her hand on my shoulder, as Bella and Pete bickered.

"Are they always like this?" she asked me with a laugh.

I nodded with a blank expression. "Always."

Wendy let out another laugh, her hand still on me. "They fight like an old married couple."

I pulled my lips together tightly before replying. "That they do."

I moved slightly to my right to pull my phone out of my pocket, causing Wendy to drop her hand from me. Earlier in the night, I had felt my phone buzz, but I hadn't had a chance to check it. I knew before even looking at it that it would be from Sam.

Hey

His text was simple, yet I still found myself extremely excited about it.

Hey, how did your game go?

He only took a few moments to respond.

Good. We won

I smiled with a closed mouth as I typed my reply.

Awesome. Congrats

His reply was instant with two rapid texts.

Thanks

Want to come over?

I frowned before looking up at my friends. None of them looked like they were ready to leave anytime soon, but I didn't want to deny Sam's offer. This would be the second time I rejected him and I didn't know if he was interested enough to ask me again.

Aren't you out celebrating your win?

Wasn't feeling it, I'm home alone.

Although they didn't look like it, his words were an invitation. He was alone, meaning we would be alone.

I'm at The Orchard right now.

I can pick you up.

I looked around the room and spotted Nathan. He sat with his friends, a pretty cheerleader perched on his lap. Surely he wouldn't notice if I left, but what about my friends? I would have to make up a believable excuse.

Okay.

I'll be there in ten minutes

"Damn, I have to get going," I announced, causing my friends to look at me.

"Why?" Bella asked, giving me a strange look.

"Yeah, we're your only friends," Pete added, causing me to glare at him.

"Charlene is behind on an order she needs to bake for tomorrow, she called Sam and he's going to come get me so we can help," I explained my lie. Hopefully that was believable enough.

"Sam Knight?" Wendy asked incredulously.

I ignored her.

"You better not let Nathan see you going off with Sam," Ross said in a warning tone.

"Cover for me," I said, looking over at Nathan who was still preoccupied. "I don't think he'll notice."

Bella looked as if she wanted to say something, but didn't. I could only imagine what she wanted to say. Surely, it was about Sam and I was glad she held her tongue. I did not want to talk about him with her ever again.

I'm here

As soon as I got the text, I stood up and announced that I would be leaving. I gave one last glance to Nathan to be sure he wouldn't see me leave before I briskly walked out of the small restaurant. Sam was pulled up near the door and I quickly slid myself into his passenger's seat.

"Hey," he greeted with a smile, putting the car in drive and taking off.

"Hey," I replied breathlessly, pulling my seat-belt on.

At that moment, I began to grow nervous thinking about what the two of us would do at his house. Alone. I knew I wasn't ready to go too far, but what exactly was too far for me?

"You're being quiet," Sam pointed out, glancing at me briefly.

"Just thinking," I answered quietly. I didn't want to admit to him what I was thinking about. It would feel awkward if he knew what I was thinking, especially if he was expecting something from me.

"You get lost in your head a lot," he noted.

"Sorry," I mumbled in response.

"It's not a bad thing," he quickly added. "Just something I noticed."

Soon enough we were pulling into Sam's driveway. His house was a decent size and an all around normal looking space. It was exactly something you would expect someone like him would be living in. The house wasn't too big, nor was it small. The lawn seemed to be well-kept along with the flower bed in front. The whole area seemed to lack any flaws, kind of like Sam.

I was lost in my head again, as Sam would say, since I didn't even notice him get out of the car. He stood at the passenger's door and yanked it open, looking down at me as if he was deep in thought.

"Are you okay?" he asked, moving aside so I could get out of the car.

I let out a breath. "I'm fine."

Sam didn't seem to believe me, but he let it go for now. I flinched in surprise when his hand grabbed hold of mine, his thumb rubbing my skin comfortingly. His touch was able to calm my ever growing nerves. I smiled down at our hands and then back up at him to see that he was already looking at me. The two of us seemed to have a silent conversation, as if asking the other if they were okay with what was happening. When neither of us pulled away, Sam took that as a sign to go for it.

His hand gripped mine tighter and he lead me ever so slowly into his home.

**

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