Flora

As the rest of his family piled into the living room to watch TV, Sean stayed behind and cleared the dishes with me. His eyes were on the table, dark and preoccupied, and as usual I couldn't tell what was going through his head.

"What are you thinking?" I asked.

He looked up and smiled. "Not much. I'm just thinking you're really great with parents."

"I wasn't just trying to impress them, you know. I honestly like talking to them."

"I know, otherwise you'd say your hobby is volunteering at the soup kitchen instead of waking up in crisp white Egyptian cotton."

I smiled. "I can't help being myself, but I did try to be my best self."

"Why?"

"I thought it'd make you happy. You want your parents to like your friend who they've invited for dinner, right? Even if I'm just an ex-girlfriend." Linda's boyfriend really should learn a thing or two from me. If he took her seriously, he definitely should make an effort.

Sean lifted his eyes to my face and looked at me in a way that brought back many memories, like he adored me but didn't know what to do about it. "You're not just an ex-girlfriend," he said softly, then he took the dirty dishes to the sink.

"Hey, I'll do it."

"It's okay, I will," he said. "You've never done any house chore in your life, have you?" There was a teasing glint in his eyes.

"I make very good coffee with the coffee machine," I said, "and I can at least help you load the dishwasher."

Our fingers touched occasionally when he handed over the plates, and my heart jumped each time it happened. I scolded myself. This was a boy who I had done a lot of things with. I had touched many parts of his body which were a lot more off-limits, and I was freaking out about our fingers touching? How juvenile.

"So you feel lucky to be my history partner? This is new," he said.

"I can change my mind, can't I?" I peered at him briefly from under my lashes. "Actually, I left out a few things when I was telling your folks about how I like working with you. For instance, I didn't tell them that I really like it when you try putting up with my craziness with mild amusement."

"Mild amusement?" His eyebrows rose. "Try excruciating reluctance."

No need to argue with him because we both knew it was true. "When I get upset you drop your cocky attitude immediately. I also like that although you're stubborn and opinionated, you go through that drama thing with me even though you think it's stupid."

"Flora, are you giving me a compliment here or are you condemning me? I keep hearing words like cocky and stubborn," he said. I suspected he was embarrassed that I was suddenly saying nice things to him.

"I'm saying I love working with you."

We locked eyes. His blue eyes were as clear as crystals and he gazed at me fondly, just as back when he used to say I was the most unpretentious girl he'd ever met. It was so hard not to like him.

I dropped the line I had been building up the suspense for. "When you look at me like that, I just feel like I really, really want to kiss you."

He stared at me stunned, eyes wide and beautiful, not blinking. I knew he wanted to kiss me too but he was deliberating if it was a good idea. I raised my chin slightly. Our eye contact didn't break, and I hoped I could hypnotize him if I stared hard enough.

He leaned in and I closed my eyes, only to receive a peck on the left cheek. It was soft, light, and entirely too brief.

My eyes flung open. "Wow, a kiss on the cheek? Can I post this on Facebook and ask everyone what it means?" I said loudly. "Is he testing the waters? Telling me to stay away? Hallucinating and seeing his sick grandma?"

He laughed. "I'll tell you myself. It means I think you're cute, but stop flirting with me."

"Hmmm." I scratched my chin. "Then how do I say I think you're cute too, but I want to keep flirting with you?"

I stood on tiptoe and kissed him back, also on the cheek, before he had time to react. "Wait, I think I didn't say it well enough. Let me try saying it more slowly this time..."

He chuckled, dodging me as I pretended to attack him again.

"Maybe with a British accent?" I went on.

He picked up the dishtowel and swatted me playfully, fending himself. I laughed along with him, and I couldn't remember the last time I had such a great evening.

***

"A kiss on the cheek? I'm so disappointed," Sandra said on the phone after I reported my latest progress. "I thought Sean had balls. After you sucked up to his parents for the entire evening, the least he can do is give you a proper French."

"Aww, come on." I laughed. "I thought it was pretty cute."

Sandra snorted. "You're hopeless. Everything Sean does is cute to you." I heard her taking a gulp on the other end. Maybe her iced herbal tea. "You have to listen very carefully. Don't text him or call him for the whole weekend. Make him miss you a little."

"Don't we need to strike while the iron is hot?"

"Nothing is hot yet, honey. We'll do something to go in for the kill on Monday. Trust me on this one."

***

The sky was crisp and blue on Monday morning. I sat on the lawn and waited for class to start, sipping hot lattes with Carmen and Sandra. Janet was off in her little corner faraway listening to music. I chose to spare Carmen the details of my heart-breaking operation since I didn't particularly enjoy being preached at.

At that moment, she nudged me in the elbow. "Look, there's Sean."

Why was she pointing that out? Had I been acting really obvious? Maybe I mentioned him one too many times.

I quickly swallowed the rest of the coffee down my throat. He was coming toward us! Dressed in a pair of low rise Levis and a simple grey sweater, he sure was pleasing to the eye and I felt a wave of nausea passing over me, like I was 10 and talking to my crush for the very first time.

A second later he was here. "Flora," he acknowledged. "Sandy and Carmen." He smiled at all of us but I imagined that when it came to my name he kind of drawled longer. He could've been saying "Flora and the rest" for all that mattered.

Did he miss me? Were we back to square one? I searched his face for clues, but I couldn't tell what he was thinking at all. A weekend apart with no contact could change many things. An unfamiliar sense of insecurity crept under my skin. For all of my chatty moments, I felt a lack of words.

Luckily it was Sandra Jenkins to the rescue. "Sean, do you consider yourself an ice-cream person?"

"Sure." He glanced at me. "I can't survive on vanilla sundae alone, like Flora does, but who doesn't like ice-cream?"

"Great." Sandra smiled. "There's this new parlor opening up at the intersection of Walsh Street and Berkeley Ave, and we want to try it."

"We're so sick of Amber's and the banana split," I added, although I loved Amber's and I didn't know about any new ice cream place until this moment.

"So if you and the guys aren't doing anything later, come join us. Bring Alan, of course. Carmen has finally decided to give him a chance, and a group date might do the trick." Sandra's lies rolled easily off her tongue. I knew she was making it less about him to weaken his defense mechanism, although the part of wanting a group date wasn't a lie.

Carmen was nice enough to help. "I'm not interested in Alan, but I can use some ice-cream. Come?"

"Sure," Sean said. "If Flora's not bugging me about going over our Broadway production one more time, my schedule is clear."

My heart rose all the way from my three-inched Louboutins back to its usual location. "I can give you a break," I said, "although you showed me some of the worst acting in human history."

I stood up to leave as the bell rang for homeroom. Sandra was such a good friend. I knew she planned on going to some gallery with Daniel so she could feel smug about her refinedness, but instead she deigned to eat artificial sweeteners with us pariahs. I didn't know how anyone's going to survive without a little bit of Sandy in her life.

***

We were sitting in the ice-cream parlor, and everyone was talking to everyone else excitedly. Conversations were intersected, and people were cut off.

"I want to tell you guys about something really funny," I started to say, but Jake had a louder voice, and when he started to brag about the new Jeep he bought, he got everyone's attention. I closed my mouth.

"You were saying?" Sean turned to me, waiting for me to finish.

I smiled across from him and told him my story, and we were in our own little world.

Sometimes on a group date, you still get the feeling that some people are closer than others and they really just want to be with each other. Like Sean and I, obviously. We fell in steps naturally when we moved from one place to the other, and I knew I was getting all his attention.

When we'd arrived, he gestured for me to sit in the best seat. The best seat was the one on the sofa with cushions surrounding it, instead of the stiff chairs close to the busy aisle. As Jake plopped right down and took away the menu, Sean stood up and got another one for me, asking me what I wanted. Later he went to get everyone napkins just when I felt like I needed one and was ruffling through my purse.

It was those little, negligible things that spoke with volume and I totally noticed.

"How's your pineapple smoothie?" I asked, nodding towards his glass.

"I think I like Amber's better."

"Really? Can I try it?" Without waiting for a reply I reached for his straw. I took a long sip and ran my tongue over my lips, licking away the smoothie. "Hmmm. You know, it's not bad."

This was a move I had tried many times in front of the mirror to make sure I got it just right. The effect I was going for was sexy without being slutty, which was extremely hard to pull off, mind you. From the look on Sean's face I knew I succeeded.

Score one for Team Flora.

"Do you want to try mine?" I offered.

"No, not really."

"Come on, try it! I'm really good at ordering desserts." I scooped up an enormous ball of ice cream and carefully added a blueberry on top. "Here."

He tried to take the spoon from me, but I dodged. I held it close to his mouth.

Neither of us moved in a split second. I narrowed my eyes, encouraging and challenging him at the same time. Sean wasn't one to make a fuss, as predicted. He leaned in and swallowed the scoop.

Team Flora scored again!

"How is it?" I tilted my head slightly.

"It's...refreshing."

I smiled. "They claim they use real fruit in their ice cream. I'm not sure I can say the same for your pineapple thing, but I like it too."

"Well, you can have mine if you want."

I moved closer and curled up my lips. "Only if you feed me."

He looked away and ignored me. He turned to Jake and asked if they decided on a movie yet.

The suggestion of watching a movie had came up earlier, and it was brought up by Sandra. She usually didn't want to hang with the jocks for too long because she was afraid their vulgarity would rub off on her, but apparently she decided to extend this date for my sake.

When Queen Jenkins made a request, no one turned her down, even when she suggested watching a Thai movie about ghosts. Sandra actually hated all horror genre, gory and slasher movies in particular, but I knew she did this so I could have excuses to grab Sean or something.

"You're into horror movies?" Jake asked. "I thought you only watched movies with subtitles."

"Well, this one's got subtitles," Sandra said, "and I can't judge horror movies until I see one for myself, then I can openly talk about how bad they are."

"I think I want to watch the one about car race more," Alan said.

"Alan, if you're scared or something, I'll cover your eyes when the scary parts come on," Sandra said icily, and no one made any more attempt of objection.

After pushing through the crowd outside and with Sean kind of shielding me with his arm, once in the movie theater I was conveniently seated next to him. He remembered I didn't like the aisle seat and made sure of that. I cast a quick glance at his profile in the darkened theater, at his dark lashes and his perfect face. It was making it very hard for me to concentrate.

A scary scene came on screen and I screamed.

"What's wrong, little Flora?" Sean taunted. I was apparently the only one who screamed.

I opened my mouth to protest that I was only startled (not scared!) when I screamed again, even louder than the first time. Our eyes met and suddenly I was in a fit of uncontrollable giggles.

"Shh..." He reached over and covered my mouth with his hand, trying not to laugh himself. "Shut up. Did you notice you're the only one making any noise in here?"

"That's why it's so funny..." I choked out.

The woman sitting in front glared at us and Sean whispered a hasty sorry.

Eventually I quieted down. The suspense was building and I really did start to feel nervous, and the drumming in the background pounded directly on my chest. Tentatively, I slid my fingers across the armrest and clutched his arm.

After all, I didn't want to waste Sandra's goodwill.

He didn't pull back. Even when I was almost completely leaning against him he didn't pull back. For the rest of the hour, I concentrated entirely on the movie. Well, almost. That and the warmth coming from Sean's body.

I wished I could hold his hand.

.