Breanna Michelle Santana

"There you are," Kaign panted, having finally caught up with me,"We've been looking for you. Dylan's getting the rental, you ready?"

"I thought my dad was supposed to be coming?"

Kaign gritted,"About that, he's busy. You know, with wedding stuff."

My eyebrows carved in my forehead. "You've been talking to my father?"

With hesitation, Kaign answered me. "Yes, you'd be surprised," he said.

I didn't think too much about what he said. I mean, it wasn't totally weird that they were in contact, Kaign did stay with us for a little bit.

Waving it off, I walked with Kaign outside and waited for Dylan to pull up.
Once he did, we put our luggage in the trunk and filed in the car.

I noticed the tension between the two of them but just stayed quiet in the back and minded my business. I'm sure I was what was wrong with them, though.

======

"Thank you," I heard Kaign say to our bellhop as he gave a tip and shut the door once he was on the other side.

"Generous tip," I heard Dylan snarl, triggering a cold stare.

Not wanting to endure another one of their never ending arguments, I trudged to my room. Well, it wasn't my room but there was a closed room in the suite that I claimed before they could. What? I needed it more than them, I'm the girl.

...

Hours went by with me just lying in bed, channel surfing.

Knock! Knock! Someone's knuckles gently hit the other side of the door.

Already knowing it was Kaign, I didn't respond.

He respected my space enough to not come in and I appreciated that. Ultimately, though, I felt like I was being such a child. I was in a funk for what seemed like no reason. Really, I didn't know what was even wrong. Perhaps everything was.

"We're getting ready to go out, I'd like it if you came with us," Kaign paused,"the Uber will be here in an hour, if you change your mind."

After wasting another few minutes consumed by the white sheets, I decided to get up.

Maybe a night out is what I needed - a distraction, I thought. I was owed a good night after last night's disaster dinner with Grayson.

Climbing out of bed, I met the boys in the living room area. "We pregaming, or what?"

Kaign and Dylan looked at each other before glancing back at me with devilish smirks.

"Hello, Brea, nice to meet you." Kaign teased, passing me a bottle of Jose Cuervo.

Well, here goes nothing...

======

The three of us barely made it into the Uber, already too tipsy.

My first mistake was drinking on an empty stomach. No. My first mistake was drinking clear like it was water. And I wasn't even a drinker, I usually couldn't get past the taste!

Our Uber driver was an older, black man with a thick accent - I wasn't to say some sort of African - and no facial hair. He wore a dated grey hat and a blue collared shirt with strips and that's all I could see. Kaign took the front seat while I got in the back with Dylan, the drunker one. He was such a lightweight, I observed.

Our driver (not even going to try and butcher his name) was very calm and collected as a driver coming from another direction almost ran right into us but stopped just as our driver slammed on his breaks, too. All of our bodies flew up and I ended up almost in the front seat. We had to laugh. With Kaign, Dylan, and I all hysterical, the driver let out a faint chuckle and went on safely once the other car passed.

Tears were literally in my eyes as I struggled to sit back and gather myself. I could've peed, it was so funny, you just had to be there!

In almost no time, we arrived at the club. It was one I wasn't familiar with but Kaign heard about it and figured it'd be a good time.

The three of us laughed our way out of the car.

"Thank you," I said to the handsome man,"love you!"

"Alright. Buh-bye," he beamed, waving until we were on the sidewalk so he could pull off.

"I'm giving him five stars," I said out loud, making Kaign and Dylan laugh some more.

"Here's to a good night," I cheered, standing outside of the club.

"Ooh, this is a good light. Let's take some pictures!" Kaign suggested, making Dylan the cameraman. How could I have forgotten how much Kaign loved his Insta? Note the sarcasm.

======

"I'm drunk." That's all I could say the whole night.

I wasn't sloppy, but definitely unable to make any rational decisions. For real, I could hardly walk in a straight line and my sight was going.

When I looked over my shoulder, Kaign and Dylan weren't there.
Pouting, I blinked my falsies and scanned the scene for my friends.

Ah, they were on the dance floor.

Bored and lonely, I wanted to go mingle but everyone was either rude or getting too handsy.

Feeling the sudden urge to pee, my black thigh-high boots carried me to the ladies room where I waited in a ridiculously long line. Maybe it wasn't ridiculous, it just seemed like that because I really had to pee.

Needing to distract myself, I slid a hand in my back pocket to grab my phone and check any missed notifications.
Just a few missed calls from my dad but I figured I'd deal with him in the morning when I was sober. He probably was just making sure I was alright.

Vibrating my pink-painted lips, I checked social media. Joey 'liked' the picture that I took outside of the club about an hour ago and posted right then and there.

Oh yeah, I'm back in town. Maybe he knew that and wants to hang out, I thought in my intoxicated head. I should text him.

No, I don't want to seem thirsty, he never replied to my "you up" text. Ugh, cringe. I mentally facepalmed myself for even sending that.

After using the bathroom, I walked up to the mirror slightly off-balance and washed my hands. Once they were dried off with the machine, I teased my hair that had long since fallen flat of it's waves.

Other drunk girls handed me compliments, saying I was pretty and that they loved me despite us having never met. I met a few potential girl friends but it didn't matter because I planned on going away very soon, and never coming back. Not to Oregon, anyway.

Having left the musty bathroom, I was back in the sea of sweaty twenty to thirty year olds, grinding on each other, all drunk or high.

At first Kaign and Dylan were no where to be found again but then I saw them at our booth arguing.

My eyes rolled, I was so over it.

That's when I decided, if I was the cause of all their problems, I would just remove myself.
However, I did send them both a text so they wouldn't worry as much.

======

KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK! I waited for him to come to the door.

Nervous, I pushed my boobs up and checked my reflection in the iPhone camera.

Minutes later, the door opens at a crack.

"Brea? W-what're you doing here? What time is it?" He asks, his voice sounding sleepy.

I saw that he was shirtless and his hazel eyes were squinted like they hadn't yet adjusted to being in the light.

"Hey, Joey," I breathed out,"I know you saw that I was in town so I figured we'd pick up where we left off." That was bold to say, even for drunk me.

He looked awfully scatterbrained, like he didn't remember the time we'd spent together a month or so ago.

"Maybe this will jog your memory," I said, lunging towards him for a kiss. I aggressively leaned in, quite literally throwing myself at him but he pushed away.

"Joey?" Another woman's voice called out. Suddenly, she appeared by his side. A short, skinny girl with porcelain skin who wore nothing but a bedsheet around her otherwise naked body.

Oh, okay. That's embarrassing...

"It's not what it looks like, Riley. This is Brea, an old friend. She's obviously drunk, let me help her. Go back to bed, I'll be there in a second,"he cleared things up with his company.
Before walking back inside, the girl gave me the most stank look like I was a damn animal.

I was mad at Joey for talking about me like that as if I wasn't right there. This was the same guy who was ready to lay down candles and rose petals to get the chance to sleep with me and now he's acting like I'm nothing?
Then again, I suppose he didn't owe me any loyalty, and I did show up unexpected after not keeping in touch, so what did I expect?

Joey excused himself to put on a shirt and reappeared a minute later, clearly concerned about my current state.

I mumbled under my breath,"it's silly, I shouldn't be here. Sorry-"

"No, Brea, wait a minute. What do you need, you obviously came for a reason. What is it, do you need a ride, money, or something?"

"What," my face curled,"no, I don't need your money! I came because I thought we could... y'know."

"Oh," Joey gibed,"Brea, I'm seeing Riley now. Where did you get that idea?"

"Well, you wanted me before. I just thought that-"

"That I'd wait for you? Look, you're a great girl but I don't wait for anyone. Besides, you have too much going on, it's a lot to process. You get that, don't you?"

My face fell. Ouch. Ripping my earring out would've been less painful.
The liquor made me more sensitive, so I didn't like hearing that. While I'm sure that was his truth, it made me feel really shitty. I had enough on my shoulders and didn't want to have to do anymore self-evaluation than I've already done.

Joey must've caught my facial expression and felt bad. He grabbed my wrists and tried consoling me. "Oh, Brea, I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to—"

"Fuck it, it's fine. Please, don't touch me," I said, backing up,"um, I'm gonna go. It was nice seeing you." I tried keeping my cool, clinging onto what little dignity I had left.

Holding my head up high, I rounded the corner and waited until he was out of sight to let the waterworks begin.

Prime example of why I don't think "love" is for me.