Wherein Lisa was always beside her first love: Jennie. But Jennie still chooses him, her first love: Kai.

-angst-

...

"You know you can pull off any other guy there nini! You can't ugly cry yourself just for that guy, that freaking Kai!" Lisa sat angrily at the end of Jennie's bed.

It's been going for about 2 weeks now. Lisa would always come and check for Jennie, her first love slash her bestfriend. Jennie doesn't allow anyone to enter her room, not even her mother. Her mother didn't go to comfort her daughter anyway due to a sudden business trip to another country, although she leave Jennie to Lisa. Lisa thinks she can't handle Jennie's heartbreak phase, she's just a teen. She's just as hurt as Jennie.

"Lili!" The brunette throws a pillow to Lisa. "That guy I'm crying for is the guy I love! Can't you just let me cry myself out? Ugh, I miss him already!" Jennie cried more into another pillow while getting her knees up to her chest

"But, look at you?!" The tall girl made sure she was wearing a disgusted face. Sure, Jennie is all wasted and gloomy however she remains pretty in Lisa's eyes.

"What?"

"You look really ugly right now nini."

"Ugly?"

"Uhuh, really ugly."

Jennie quickly crawl into the tall girl's front and met her eyes. "Look at me. Am I ugly?"

The latter push Jennie's shoulder and stood up while pinching her nose. "Your breath is smelly too."

Lie.

It was minty. It almost took her breath away. And it made her heart race like crazy when the brunette went into her, really really close.

Lisa knew she was already winning when Jennie ruffled her hair in annoyance and lock herself in the bathroom.

"I hate you!"

"That's okay!"

.

"Now. Do I still look ugly?" The brunette asks, turning around.

Lisa gaped her mouth open as she look at Jennie from head to toe. Jennie's hair look so soft now, her white tank top and grey sweatpants made her look more presentable and her sweet perfume was invading Lisa's insides throughout to flutter her heart, when she heard her clears throat, she composed herself. "Yeah. You look.. okay now."

Jennie's eye squinted. "What, okay?"

"Okay." Lisa shrugged. "Like human now."

"No! I need more!" Jennie stomped as she felt something was missing.

"More what?" The sitting from the couch Lisa stood up. She was getting worried for her bestfriend. "I said you look okay now." She was not the compliment or hype type of friend when it comes to Jennie. Hell, she is Lisa's crush. Of course Lisa felt shy. But either way to her other friends Lisa was a bubbly one.

Jennie sighs and sat down the couch then look up at Lisa. Lisa, who was looking down at the brunette furrowed her brows when Jennie's eyes was welding up with tears before sighing a heavy breath. "Kai would always say more. More. When I say I'm so ugly. He would always say I'm pretty, amazing and wonderful. I guess, I'm really ugly now he's gone." Jennie whines and ugly cry again.

Lisa sat and pats her back softly. God, her sweet vanilla scent isn't helping.

This is ridiculous. You can't depend your appearance to a guy.

"Nini~ stop crying about him will you?" She asks her more calm and serene now. "Y-you are more than pretty. Beautiful I guess? Idk. Your so precious, cute, fantastic, fabulous, great and awesome person." She gulps as Jennie's smile went to her eyes now and gave her a hug, pertaining to how thankful she was, she squeezed Lisa more. And that's when Lisa thought to give it a shot, that this is quite the nice time to confess her feelings. "You know Jennie."

There was still tears along Jennie's eyes when she look up at Lisa. "Wae?"

"I will always be by your side. No matter what. I'll make you happy and I'll promise to kick everyone who hurts you."

"Lisa.." Jennie tried to not cry again but end up failing. She hides her tears in Lisa's crook of neck and it send shivers to Lisa.

"Jennie. Forget about him. You have me and I can give you more than that because you deserve better plus I really like--"

Ding dong*

Lisa huffed and stood up. "I'll get it." She rolled her eyes as she opens the door. "What are you doing here?"

"I want to talk to Jennie." Kai composed her self and lift the things in his hands. There was flowers and chocolates. Typical.

"She's not here." Lisa leans on the doorframe and cross her arms.

But Jennie's voice creep in from the living room, and Kai heard it. "Lisa who's that?"

"That's not Jennie." She defends herself.

"Please. Lisa, I know I hurt your bestfriend but I need to talk to her--"

"For what?"

"I love her.."

"Oh, please we're 16."

Kai looks at Lisa unbelievably. "Lisa. I love her. Being young doesn't except us from falling inlove."

And that hit Lisa like a truck. Being young doesn't except her from falling inlove with her bestfriend. She knew she was falling with her but she would always think they're too young for the so-called-thing love.

"Lisa, what took you so long-- Kai?" Jennie showed up.

"Baby.. please, let's talk." Kai showed sincerity in his voice.

And just like that. Lisa breaks inside as Jennie past through her shoulders and jump out to hug Kai. The guy whom she love.

Lisa stroll back to the living room and get her bag. She wants to go home. Why was she feeling this? Is this what've Jennie felt these past few weeks? Damn. It hurts.

"Lisa where are--"

"Home. I'll let you two talk!" She replied, not looking back.

That was Lisa's first heartbreak.

...

...

"Again Jendukie?" Jisoo ask again, making sure she heard her friend, Jennie right.

"We broke up."

"Wdym?" Rose look at her with confusion.

"He doesn't have time for me." Jennie shrugged. But her eyes quickly welled up with tears. "Now that we're in college, everything's busier.. I-i just don't--" she stopped muttering when a handkerchief showed up in front. The hands were pretty slim and familiar.

It was Lisa who one handed it. "Don't cry, you look ugly." And with that, Jennie glared at her and pull the handkerchief from her, her tears fall back because she was annoyed now.

"You.."

"What?" Lisa ask as she sat down beside Rosè. Getting ready to eat. "You really look ugly when you cry trust me. And, we're in the canteen. So many people Jennie."

The brunette just rolled her eyes. She was getting really annoyed to Lisa this past few days. Lisa didn't answer her phone whenever she calls and she never sat beside Jennie now, adding the fact that she never calls her nini again is frustrating for Jennie. It feels like Lisa is too far now.

"Jendukie? Your spacing out. Forget about him. Move on--"

Jennie rolls her eyes as she gets back from reality. "It isn't that easy Jisoo-unnie."

"Just eat wifey. Eat and eat." Rosè suggest as she munches her lunch.

"Then I'll be fat." Jennie pouted.

"Tsk." Lisa shook her head before eating. When she look up, all of them were looking at her. "What?"

"Come on Lisa. Jendukie is heartbroken here."

"Yeah," Rosè second that. "please validate her feelings just for now."

Lisa let out a laugh. "Guys. Trust me. That crying Jennie will always comeback to that fucking Kai. She's kind of stupid."

"Lisa!"

"I need to go to the bathroom." Jennie stutters as she walk away. Why is Lisa like that? She calls me stupid.. she never said that to me. She was really sweet and caring. Why does she seems so far now. The brunette can't help to let her tears fall unto her face.

"Lisa.." Jisoo's voice were threatening. "You went too far don't you think?"

"Unnie, please calm down." Rosè went to Jisoo's side. "But Lisa. Go after Jennie will you? You said you knew her better right? Then go, please."

Lisa lift a spoon of rice to her mouth before strolling to Jennie's whereby. She sighs and gulps all the rice before entering the bathroom. It seems like they were only the people inside it because Jennie cried herself out infront of a mirror. "Lili is sorry." She said, the corner of her mouth lifted as she spread her arms. "Come on nini, my hands are getting tired~"

"Shut up."

The tall girl's jaw drop. And then she realized she really did hurt her bestfriend. "I'm sorry." She said, more sincere now. She went to Jennie and hug her from the back, her chin resting to the small girl's shoulder. "I'm sorry." She apologized once again as she hug her tight. "Your not stupid. Kai is-- ouch!"

"Don't bad mouth Kai!"

Lisa rolls her eyes as she felt her stomach tense. She pulled away from the hug before heaving a sigh. "Idk. You have me.. u-us, you don't need him Jennie. You deserve better. You know this, your a pretty smart girl right?"

"But I love him.."

"Then don't."

"As if I that's so easy."

"I've done it."

"Oh! Really? How.."

Lisa shrugged. She was expecting her bestfriend to ask 'who' not how. 

"See? You can't, and I can't too! It's not really easy."

"Yeah." she muttered under her breath as she met Jennie's feline eyes. "I guess it's really hard.'

...

"Lisa!?" Jisoo shouts at the other line in her phone. "Freaking get Jennie here! She's drunk, why didn't you even come?!" She was shouting because the sounds from the club was loud.

"Isn't Kai there?"

"Ah.. I knew it. You didn't go here because you thought Kai is going, guess what that jerk didn't show up!" Jisoo mumbled then laugh, her head spinning because of the alcohols.

"And I'm guessing Jennie's been crazy drinking because he isn't there?" Lisa sighs at the other line. "I'm coming."

"Yes Limario, get your girl here." Jisoo said in a teasing manner. "that's right, that's a right behaviour there."

"She's not my girl, she's my bestfriend." Lisa hissed.

"Oooh, still denying huh? I've seen your letters Lisa! Inside your dorm."

Lisa stood up, panicking. "You turtle rabbit! Go away there, Jennie might hear you!"

"And that letter seems its not for bestfriends," Jisoo chuckles. "It seems the person is in love~" she sings then laughs, literally drunk.

"Aish, shut your mouth! I'm coming!" 

.

"Bye Lisayah~ take care of Jennie!" Lisa glared at Jisoo. She was a bit upset that Jisoo invaded her privacy but she can't do anything about it anyways. Jisoo knows now. She loves Jennie. She need to talk to her quickly.

"Bye monkey! I'll take care of Jisoo-unnie!"

"Bye chipmunk, you guys take care! Don't be in an accident."

"As if anyone wants that, but yeah! Suuure!"

Lisa chuckles as Rosè stumbles down with Jisoo on the ground but they managed themselves to get in the car. She huffed, shooking her head at her friends' clumsiness and decides to head to her car with the brunette on her back. Lisa was carrying her because she was dead out drunk. Good thing Jennie is smaller and light-weight so Lisa got everything controlled.

"Lili," Jennie cries in her back. 

"Hmm?" she managed hummed despite the shiver she felt.

"I need water."

"Hmm, we'll get one later at home."

"Lili."

"yeah?" There was a deafening silence before Jennie responds.

"I miss you."

"Hmm." she only hums in reply, making the brunette wiggle herself on Lisa's neck.

"Ei~ Don't you miss me?" she whines like a baby.

Lisa gently puts Jennie down in the front seat as they reached her car. "I do."

"Then why are you so mean to me?" Jennie pouted and started crying.

Lisa can't help but to look at her pout. She could kiss it, but she won't. She close the door after she fasten Jennie's seat belt and goes at the other side.

She was starting the engine when Jennie spoke out. "Kai? Are you taking me home?"

Lisa lips involuntary shake. She tightens her grip at the steering wheel as her heart felt it was squeeze. 

"Are we okay now?"

Lisa can't help but to massage her temple. She need to get away from drunk Jennie ASAP.

"I love you Kai. Please come back to me." Jennie utters before passing out.

And that was Lisa's second heartbreak. And its still Jennie. Her bestfriend.

"I love you too.."

.

"Jennie." The tall girl lightly taps Jennie's  mandu cheeks to wake her up. "Jen.. we're here." she started unbuckling her seat belt before carrying her in a bridal style. She really passed out, tsk.

After she locks her car, she strolled through the hallway with Jennie in her arms. Their dorms we're actually just beside each other. So, Lisa decides to take Jennie to hers inside. Lisa enters her dorm with Jennie. She carefully let her down unto her bed. Her roomate, Chaeyoung might wake up. But it seems like she was wrong because moans started filling the dorm. She quickly shut her bedroom door. Shit, Chaeyoung brought a girl again!

Lisa abruptly put her pillows beside Jennie's ears because she might wake up! And Lisa can't do anything. She would be embarrass to cut off their lovely time, so she went beside Jennie because she has no choice. Anyways, it isn't her first time sleeping with Jennie. They always had sleepover when their in middle school so this isn't that different now. Lisa tries to convince herself and calm her heart.

Not long after, her eyes surrender but she made sure to face the opposite side of Jennie's face. She might not control herself and kiss the cute drunk girl. 

.

Morning came and Lisa found Jennie clinging unto her. She caress her hair for a minute before getting up. She was all dressed up and smell good when she got out of the bathroom, she glance at the brunette and she was still sleeping. The moment she went to the kitchen she found an unfamiliar girl but she wasn't shock. She normalize seeing unfamiliar pretty girls the day she live in the dorm with Chaeyoung. Damn that short tiger can literally hook up with someone who she likes with a wink.

"Hi," she greets before minding her own business now. She was done making coffees for herself and cereal for Jennie when Chaeyoung's chick spoke out. "I'm Mina."

"Hi Mina." She replies, still not totally interacting because she was busy putting all the breakfast she prepared on a tray. When she was done. She gaze up to Mina and saw confusion all over her face. "Don't worry I'm not scared nor shock. Typical Chaeyoung," She shrugs. "can pull every girls." when Mina's face fell into more confusion Lisa sighs. "Idk, I always expect it every other week or--" she clears her throat. She bit her lip in anxious, she thinks she said a lil bit too much. Huh. is this Mina for real now? or not?

"okay Mina. I'll get going, feel free to use the kitchen--" Mina strolls back Chaeyoung's room before Lisa could say bye and the next thing she all could hear was faint shouts. Ugh, that Mina is really for real huh? The way they argue is.. the thing. Something must really going on except from hooking up. Sorry my dude, Chaeyoung.

"Ouch!" Lisa runs to her room as she heard a thud. Jennie is on the floor as she enter. "shit my head is spinning!"

Lisa can't help but to laugh instead of worrying. "And that is on crazy drinking Miss Jennie."

The brunette quickly gave her a deadpan glare. "water." she paused for a second after Lisa gave her a look. "please."

"fine. i'll get back with a glass of fine water." Lisa puts down the tray and goes back to the kitchen. "Here." Jennie quickly drank the whole glass of water as soon as Lisa gave it. She was dead thirsty and her throat is dry as a desert.

Once Lisa finishes her coffee she faced her bestfriend. "I'll be going now."

"Huh? It's weekend Lisa." Jennie climbs back to bed. "Where are you going?" She  asks as she massage her temple. Her head was heavy and hot due to hangover.

"Uh.. some errands."

The brunette looks at the nearest clock and frown. "Seven in the morning?"

Lisa clicks her tongue. "I'm going. Eat the food I made and get out outside my room after. Bye." She locks the door.. no more like slam?

Jennie's eyes widen. Is that Lisa? Woah.

She has never seen her bestfriend look serious and irritated like that before.. yes she saw her got mad but not at her. Her stomach tense. She really is far away from me now. I think I need to make it up to her.

...

All in other while, Lisa was heading to Jisoo. She freaking needs to talk to her. She knocks first. But when there's no response she opens it with her spare key. Jisoo and Rosè were roomates. So they gave Jennie and Lisa one because they were bestfriends.

She was confused when Rosè wasn't in her room. And was more mortified when she saw Jisoo in her room probably naked with Rosè. She shuts the door close. And that made a sound.

She can hear rumbling and mumbling before she seats on the couch, calming herself.

They fucked?

Geez. What the hell.

After a while, Jisoo came out first, then Rose with a blanket covering her body.. ran to her room.

The taller girl made a look at Jisoo. "So?"

"So what?"

Lisa can't help but giggle. "You guys did it more than once? It seems normal to you guys."

"So what?"

Lisa cover her mouth. "B-but, you guys are still friends right?"

"Yeah. More than friends. She's my girlfriend in secret." Jisoo shrugs. She sat beside Lisa and pulls her hair suddenly. "Don't tell this to anybody."

"Even Jennie?"

Jisoo looks at her. "You still talk to her?"

Lisa didn't respond. That made Jisoo smirk. "We're even now. Don't tell anyone about what you saw and I won't tell Jennie that her beloved bestfriend has been inlove with her since they were 16--" Rosè cut Jisoo off with a shout.

"What?! Your inlove with Jennie?"

Lisa leans back to the couch. Not gazing anyone's contact. "I won't buy you some chicken Chu."

"Lisa, Omyghad please answer me--"

"Yes. But I know it will just fade away.. so you guys don't need to worry. I'll be a good friend after I've move on. And-- don't even think on pursuing me to confess. If our friendship got ruined, it will be the end of me."

The two nodded. They seem to understand Lisa.

"But, atleast don't make it obvious that you love her idiot." Jisoo nudged her.

"Huh? I even act mean to her? Does that count being obvious?"

"Yeah. Remember that time in canteen? You were so jealous. And I came up with a conclusion then tada. It's true. Your inlove with Jennie Kim.

Lisa let out a nervous laugh. "Guys. I want to move on remember? You fucking keep on repeating that I'm inlove with her. Stop it.

"Okay." Jisoo nodded. "But atleast. Make it up to her as a friend. She doesn't deserve being treated like that you know."

"Hmm." Rosè agreed. "Just look at her like a friend and forget about your feelings--"

"It's not easy. I can't just look at her like a friend when I'm inlove.. when I love her."

"Atleast try."

...

"Lisa? C-can we hangout after your errands?" Jennie never imagined herself stuttering before when asking Lisa to hangout. She feels like now is different because Lisa is being mean to her and she doesn't know why.

Lisa who just about to open her dorm, face Jennie. She remembers what've Jisoo and Rosè said. She gulps as their eyes met. "Yeah sure. But can we do it tomorrow? I'm all lock up with thesis papers."

"Yeah sure.. too, see you tomorrow." Jennie exhales.