"Hey. . ." Kaitlyn said opening the door slightly to the darkened room, I look over at her and squint my eyes at the burning light. I've been in the dark too long. "We're having dinner, why don't you join us?" She suggests walking closer to me on the bed with Jacob lethargic body—with the just barely passing light you could see the paleness in his cheeks and lips. It has been overwhelming to see him this way but I can't bare to leave his side.

My cheeks and eyes hurt, no doubt they were swollen from crying non-stop. My baby was so lifeless and all I can do is cry.

"Um. . ." I look down wearily at Jake under me—hesitating. My heart swelled at the thought, I have be

She tug my arm, "Come on its your favorite." She tease.

I look up at her somberly and she strokes my cheeks "He's going to be okay." She assured.

"I know. . . I just don't feel right leaving him alone."

"He isn't alone, you'll be right back. Besides he isn't going anywhere, you can eat and come back—be with him for the rest of the night.

". . .okay." I say, ultimately giving in. I was hungry I didn't eat anything all day and maybe I can change into something more comfortable. I can leave for a moment.

She reached her hands to mine and I take it. She then leads me out of the room and close it back behind her. I watch the door close slowly, and I feel my swell up as another barrier shuts in him.

But Kaitlyn reassures me, "Look at me," she says taking my hand, "Everything will be fine. Jacob will be alright."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I know my brother, he is the strongest person I know," she smiles, "aside from you. He won't leave you. He will wake up."

"Okay," I nod my head. "I believe you." I trust my best friend more than anyone in the world, and she has giving me her word— her word that I will hold on to.

"Okay, good. Now you've been in this dress for too long, let's go get you changed."

I am still in my dress my from last night, the night I was supposed to go out on a date with my mate to work things out but he collapsed on me. Is that a way of God showing me a sign or what?

God has fated us together, but is saying we shouldn't be? Taking him from me like that, I can't even begin. . . What an absolute cruel joke!

I can't handle losing him. I can't! I'd just die with him, I can't. . . I love him too much

We walked into the room I was staying in and reminisce about the events that occurred exactly 24 hours ago. Jacob had a seizure and hasn't woken up since. They say, he was   hexed by my mother and I honestly don't know what to believe.

I don't know, enough. They won't tell me any specifics. A healer is supposed to on his way to help Jacob, and I don't know—I have the worst feeling.

"Can you please?" I ask turning back to her. She take the strings at the back of my dress and loosen them for me. "Thanks," I barely say, trudging into the connected bathroom. I pull the dress straps over my shoulders and let it fall to ground; exposing my naked body. I take my toothbrush and toothpaste to my teeth that I knew just smelled the worst. After that, I pull my black box braids in a bun and tie it around my head. I don't have a rubber band and if it falls down I'm GOING TO FUCKING CRY.

I don't have any! Who goes on vacation and does bring a damn hair tie?

Who goes on a vacation just to see their ex-boyfriend collapse right after proposing? And fuck, I said no. Fuck my life. It's shitty and I make shitty decisions.

What if I never get the chance to say yes. I wanted to, so badly. I wanted to tell him there's nothing I would love more, because he just does make me so happy. I should've just taken him in and kissed him—if only for second longer. . .

• • •

"Is some else here?" I ask Katie as we step closer to the dining room, I hear talk.

"Yeah, the healer and her daughter. I told you while you were in the shower. They came."

Her? I thought the healer was man. Well, what difference does it make? She's the healer, she can fix and give him back to me. "Good. Can she fix him?"

Katie looked at me sadly, "Maybe, with your help."

"My help? What can I do? I don't even understand what's wrong with him." I said as we take our final steps into the dining room. Kendrick, a woman who seems to be middle aged, and a girl next to her who I am assuming is her daughter. They are sitting with a wide spread of food out in front of them. The two guest stood in acknowledgment of me. I muster up smile and greet them politely, I look to Kendrick then Katie for introduction.

"Scarlett, this is Bella and Ella White. You guys this is, Scarlett Meyers." Kaitlyn says as we both reach for our seat across the two woman.

"Ella?" I laugh, "Why does that name sound so familiar?"

"Well, I'm sure Jacob has spoken about me—we were old friends."

"Oh, come you guys were more than just old friends." Kendrick said smirking holding out suggestive fingers.

Kaitlyn gives him a scolding look as he sat at the head of the table.

"Yeah," she nervously look over at Kendrick then barely at me, like I have something on my face.

Is there? There must be; I haven't done anything to her. Have I? Is there something that I'm missing? She fucked my man.

"You two were absolutely inseparable, and when your father found out about you two he threw an absolute fit until I convinced him what you guys had was innocent." Bella said.

My ears ring at her words. Of course they were. They probably still are, after all Jacob has known her longer than me.

"We were innocent."  She agreed.

"What ever happen to you two," Kendrick ask, sitting up with a mischievous look in his eyes, this is the second time this exact question is being asked and I can't help but be curious.

"Yeah, what happened?" I ask. Genuinely I want to know, she has to be worth the rift in my relationship—there relationship. His supposed first love.

First love, they are everything even after years of seeing each other, you'll still feel that feeling that could just pull you away from anything. Took me awhile before I stopped seeing Kai's face everyday, everywhere I went. It was torture, especially with the thought in my mind: we will never be good for each other. I had to let him go, kiss him goodbye and I did. It was hard, but I love Jake. I did it for him, for us, for what we could have been. For this ring that I can't bring myself to take off. It just fits so perfectly on my finger.

How could I remove something so perfect. This gift my soulmate gave me, in exchange for the words "I want to love you forever."

But forever was cut short, and now I'm left with this giant crystal rock in my finger and every time I see him. His face just talking to me. With his perfect teeth, the distinct shape of his nose that molds into my lips when I press them against it. The most simplest things is the reason why I love him. His sweet ass laugh and his abnormally long index finger. The callouses under the palm of his size 20 feet.

Is that why he loves her, for the simple things. How her skin is different, not much like anything I've ever seen. Is it her hair? Her eyes? What is it?

Why. . . why did he have to go hurt me like that?  Like it was nothing and I still love him despite it. I'm so stupid.

The dinner spread gets shared out. Then uncomfortable silence arise as everyone digs into their plate. I take up my fork and get ready to eat. I break a piece of casserole with my fork, I put it in my mouth and chew slowly. I beg my dry throat to open and I just barely do. I take a sip of my water and make hasty eye contact with her.

"I guess. . . we drifted apart."

"You guess?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Why did you drift apart?"

She looks up and away from me, ignoring my question. "Can you pass me the mash potatoes, please?" She asks Kaitlyn when the mash potatoes were obviously closer to me. She is obviously uncomfortable with me here—did she know I was here; that Jacob is my soulmate—before or after they slept together. Does she even feel bad for what she did? Is she that selfish, or is it that he felt too good?

I should know, I had him. We've made love, and the way does it. . .its mind throbbing. I wonder whether it was his physique or was it really his love he was providing me with.

It should be a simple answer, Jake is dominant and sexy. Irresistible. But he can also be. . .aggressive sometimes and it's crazy, I'd beg him to stop but I never really wanted him to. I always want his body on me, his hands under my belly, right there just above my pussy and his other hand holding onto milky pair of breast. His arms would be I just got wet.

He'd be sleeping right on top of me—motionless. His dick still lodged inside of me, and my cunt throbbed and tighten around him. I was exhausted and he was snoring.

A couple hours before he came home to me with a bottle of this rare, old white wine and we drunk all of it. Truth be told, I was absolutely fucked up and sloppy drunk and Jake would just try to get on me. Fucked me right there on the kitchen floor. I felt like I was on a bed of flower petals and there is nothing better than him with me. The floor was hard and cold and as drunk he was, he made love to me so gentle and in the pace that I like.

His sweet lips were everywhere, his tongue had been everywhere and I loved, because it felt like this man was actually made for me. Like the shape of his cock, when hard would become slightly crooked and he'd fit in my mouth so perfectly.

If I didn't know any better, I'd say I'm addicted sex but I know it's just him. I like Garret and, wow, he was—he was great and such a passionate lover but I couldn't help but think Jacob. Imagining his lips on mine, imagine his lips telling me "I love you" in a way that will always pierce my heart.

It's like a fairytale, why am I so drawn to him? Even in a coma, I'm at his bed side because I love him. And it hurts to think that he loves her they way he said he love me. And for week my eyes stung with tears and my chest—never felt heavier. Like I was missing something. Like I am missing something!

Is this normal? To want to love some one so bad, to want make love with endlessly, simply because he'd make the most out of your insecurities. They way he'd whisper in my ear, "Your beautiful baby girl " In the morning when only just wake up, this time right up under me and his solid voice would be raspy, basically growl this to me and it turned me on, and then we made love. Fuck, I love him.

And I could never help it when he calls me his baby girl. It made me special. Like I was in safe space, without him I'd have to find another safe space. What could ever replace him, the love of my life.

And to beautiful big beast, love me, bite me, hurt me, make love to all of me and I will see it why I say I love you so much.

Did he love her like that? In so many words, like mine. Does he want to kiss her body the way he does mine, make love to her. After all they were once lovers, or are even if we did only 48 hours ago. This sweet love, and it remains tender in my mind. The way he'd hold my body, I felt it everywhere—him everywhere.

Did he ever make her feel like that?

She's had him, they love each other and I know. I do... Why else would he do that to me? Fuck her then fuck me—tell me you love me but show me you love her. He was willing to make love to her even if it meant hurting me. This girl, she is no random girl. She has got his heart, in a way that I will never understand. So why is this ring on my finger and not hers?

"Scar?" Kaitlyn's hand rest on mine, she catches my attention with a worried look on her face. "You've barely touched your food, are you okay?"

"Yeah—yeah I'm fine." I assure her. "I'm just thinking."

"Scarlett, do you think we can speak," she looks over at Kendrick, "Alone."

"About?" I ask.

She gives me a longing look and I give in and giving up on my appetite. "Okay."

"I'll be back." I look to Kaitlyn.

"I'm sorry." She whisper.

"It's okay." I say, I look down at her as I stand. I walk out of the dining room and grab a fur blanket on the top shelf. I wrap the blanket over my shoulders. I step out and expected her to follow. She did, I hold the blanket over my arms and sit out in the red patio chair. She came out after me and sat across from me. In the middle of us a small grey table.

She stares at me blankly, she doesn't move a muscle, but I could see it in her eyes, her anxiety. I felt it to. I feel like I should hate her—I'm mean—she fucked my man! But I'm not mad, not at her not in the least. She doesn't owe me anything.

Her lips are painted with a shiny red lipstick, she had this amazing smell, like lavender. I like that. Her hair is in long waves of curls. Her skin face has patches of pale skin smoothed over by a dark skin fade. She wore a red dress, and white heels. Her legs were the same as her face—complemented her evening wear. She leans over her crossed legs and fold her hands over them. I got to give to him—she is pretty. Wow, gorgeous even. And some how I feel like I'm supposed to compete with this and I really don't want to I shouldn't have.

"First off, are you okay?"

I sit up against the seat and my body began to warm, I let the fur blanket fall to the wooden patio floor.

"Do I look okay?" I asked in my fashion nova curve outfit. A black plaid shirt that reached my mid thigh and a freeing top to match. I crossed my Reebok fitted shoes under one another as I lean closer to her. She sits back on her arm rest and glance at the ground, giving an impression of intimidation. Only if she knew.

"Yeah, I can see why he loves you." She said, her eyes genuine and somber.

"How would you know?"

"The way he talks about you. . .you make him very happy. Jacob hasn't always been the happiest person you see—he's been struggling with depression for as long as I known and he's mostly in denial about him. He has a lot of pride, he won't show it when he's going through it. You have to give him a chance—but I'm guessing by the look of your finger—you have."

I didn't know that. Depression? I never he had issues with that, but supposed I should have known. He's my mate, how could I have not seen this.

I look down that the diamond, then at her. "Oh, this." I hid my finger under my right hand on my lap. "Did you know he was going to give me this?"

"Yes. He told me he's coming to see you—make things right but he didn't tell me about a ring."

I nod my head, "Do you love him?" I bluntly ask.

"I do, yes.

"Are you still sleeping with him?"

She shrugs her shoulders, "When he wakes, ask him."

"Ask him. He's your soulmate. Aren't you guys supposed share and trust each other?"

"I thought so, but we aren't as close as I thought."

"Yeah but, I think he really loves you," she reaches her hand over the palm of mine.

"I hear it from you but I don't see it from him—besides love is overwhelming."

"That's what makes it taste so good. You love him?"

"Yes, I do."

"And you believe he's your soulmate?"

"Yes," I roll my eyes subtle.

"Then why do you question it?

"Your match made in heaven, by God himself. Despite the trials you know for a fact he is for you."

"Was," I correct.

"I can tell you one thing for sure, he isn't for me."

"Like I said it's not the same unless I see from him—if I ever."

"He isn't dead."

"There aren't any color in cheeks, I've felt him so cold. He's drifting away—unless your mother does something."

"That's the thing, my mother can't help him if she doesn't know who or what magic did that to him?"

I shrug my shoulders, "I don't know."

"You're a witch, yeah?"

"And you're a werewolf, so?"

"You must have had some luck getting in touch with him—figuring how we can help him."

"What, you mean you don't know?" I stand on my feet.

"Then what are you even doing here? He's dying and there is nothing you can do about it."

"There you go again, you keep saying he's dying, yet his heart is still beating."

"Barely!"

"But still, you're his mate you should be able to figure how we can help him."

"I'm his mate but he doesn't share this side of himself with me and even if I do have some sort of power that could sense his ailing I'm not experienced enough. I barely have full use of my powers yet."

"Okay but if I showed you a spell, do you think you can execute it." She raises to meet me eye to eye. She was just s but taller than me with her heels and as I were my shoes.

I shrug doubting, "I haven't practiced in months, I'm not sure—"

"My mom can lead you. She'll be there, she has of experience. She just need your powers."

I look at her suspiciously, my powers? "Why mine specifically?"

"In this current climate there is no witch that will step in mile of werewolves."

Current climate? "If it's to help Jake; okay but how can I be sure?"