a/n: mj's pov

When Michelle was a little girl, she stared down at her soulmark every waking moment, tracing the words with her eyes over and over and over again, until she had memorized every curve and angle of the handwriting on her wrist. She knew that if she ever saw her soulmate's handwriting, she'd recognize them instantly.

And she knew that she couldn't wait to meet them. Up until she turned eight. Because when she turned eight, her mother and father were screaming at each other so loud that she couldn't help but overhear everything they said.

She heard when her mother called soulmates stupid and wrong, she heard when her father said that he'd never loved her like he was supposed to. She heard when they both said they'd wished they weren't each other's soulmates, and she heard when her mother slammed the door on her way out and never came back.

After that, she didn't look at her soulmark again. Despite the fact, she could never forget the words that would always be there. "Oh! I'm so sorry, do you need help with that?"

It wasn't a habit that she realized she had until she was starting middle school. Her father was barely around, so she had no reason to speak to him, and she was a loner at school, so she didn't need to speak to anyone else, and then on her first day as a seventh grader, somebody spoke to her and she just didn't speak back.

It was better that way, she decided, and went on with her day. It hit her then, that she couldn't remember the last time she spoke besides to herself in the safety of her own room. She was okay with that.

She managed to get through grade seven and eight with ease, not caring about the hurt or angry looks she'd get when people talked to her but she didn't talk back. And then on her first day as a freshman, it happened.

She wasn't looking where she was going, and she was carefully balancing her books and folders on her arms as she squinted at her schedule and tried to figure out where her Biology class would be at.

Somebody slammed into her, and they both toppled to the ground, her things flying out of her grasp and littering the hallway in front of her. Anger flooded her for a moment, before she calmed, realizing it was most likely her fault, and she sighed.

Michelle pulled herself to her hands and knees and began gathering her things. "Oh! I'm so sorry, do you need help with that?" Came the kind voice of whoever had knocked her over, and she froze for a minute, the mark on her arm tingling in a way she'd only ever heard of in stories.

A split second later, she merely shook her head, stood, and she walked away, leaving the boy and his friend to stare after her. Later, she would learn that his name was Peter Parker.

It was just her luck, really, that he was in every single one of her classes. She'd see him every single day, whether he was doing his work or chatting with his best friend, Ned Leeds. Or if he was getting teased by the dumbass Flash Thompson, or even watching her.

He always looked away when he saw that she noticed him looking, but she knew.

She couldn't help but wonder why. The first time she spoke was a few weeks after she met Peter, and she saw that Flash was bothering him endlessly, and she could almost ignore it.

Then he made a comment about Peter's dead parents, and she was fuming.

"At least his parents loved him, Eugene." She spat suddenly, and they both looked to her, shocked.

"Whatever. We all know you don't have a Mom, so why the hell do you think you're so special?" Flash growled, slumping back in his seat with arms crossed.

Only someone that knew her would have seen the flinch she concealed as she turned back to her own desk. "Thank you." Peter said softly, and she almost spoke back to him. Almost. She nodded, and went back to ignoring him.

When Peter started showing up every day with badly hidden bruises and bags under his eyes to rival hers, she became concerned. She never mentioned it, never did anything about it besides watching him from afar, but she was worried.

And when Ned announced that Peter had an internship with Stark Industries, then whispered frantically with him every day after, she knew that the other boy was in on his secret, and something like jealousy tugged at her heart.

It wasn't fair of her, not when she hadn't spoken to him, when she wanted nothing to do with him. It didn't matter that he was her soulmate, it never would have worked. Still, when he whispered to Ned about his crush on Liz Allen, it hurt in a way it wasn't supposed to.

"It's not like she's your soulmate, though, dude." Ned had told Peter at lunch once, and Michelle couldn't help but listen in, not able to focus on the book in front of her no matter how hard she tried.

"I know, and once I meet whoever they are, I'll probably love them, and Liz would understand. She's excited to meet her soulmate, too."

Michelle's heart ached.

After homecoming, when Peter disappeared on them for the millionth time, the pieces finally slid into place. It wasn't hard to figure out that he was Spider-Man, but it made her want to talk to him all the more.

His bruises and tired eyes made so much more sense. "Hey, Michelle!"

Her head snapped up from the book in front of her, and she glanced around the nearly empty library until she caught sight of the person that seemed to always be on her mind lately. Peter was walking towards her with a grin, his bag slung over one shoulder.

"Can I sit with you? I've just got some homework to do."

Michelle knew she shouldn't have, but she nodded, and he beamed, dropping into the seat across from her. She tried to go back to reading, but didn't even get through one sentence before Peter was talking again.

"Can I ask you a question?"

She gave him a deadpan look as if to say 'you just did ', then nodded once again.

"Is it a medical thing? The reason you don't talk?" He questioned hesitantly, and she released a breath through her nose, shaking her head.

Unconsciously, her eyes dropped to her covered wrist, and his gaze followed. Then realization flooded his face. "Oh! You don't want to meet your soulmate?"

Michelle shrugged, and he gave a weird smile. "Cool beans. I think if I tried not to talk that long, I'd literally explode." Peter told her, and it drew an unexpected snort from her.

The brunet grinned. "I knew you could laugh! Ned thinks you're inhuman."

She tried not to show the smile tugging at the corners of her lips.

When she realized he wasn't working on anything, she looked pointedly to his bag, and he flushed as red as a tomato. "Oh, I- um, don't actually have homework. I just wanted to talk to you." He admitted sheepishly.

Michelle ignored how her stomach did flips, and stared down at the page, but didn't process a single word on it. "I'm sorry for bothering you. I'll go now." Peter apologized, standing up and turning to go, but before she realized what she was doing, the girl snapped her hand out to latch around his wrist.

He turned back around with wide eyes, and she pulled out her phone, going to her notes and typing as fast as she could. She turned it so he could see. Call me MJ.

Smiling, Peter nodded. "Kay! Bye, MJ. See you at school." And with that, he was gone.

Michelle, MJ, closed her book after he left, and stared down at the hand that had touched his arm. "I'm sorry," she whispered, because she could never give him the soulmate he was looking for.

And then she fell for him. She fell for the way he left dorky puns on post-it notes for her when she wasn't looking, for the way his eyes lit up when he got excited, for the way he was always there for the people he cared about, and even people he didn't know.

She fell in love with nerdy Peter Parker, and she wished she'd never met him. So she did the only thing she could think to do, she distanced herself from him. Didn't meet him in the library like they'd come to do most days, didn't defend him from Flash or listen to his rambles.

She didn't even watch him anymore. But, she was always aware of him. Always aware that if she turned her head, he'd be watching, aware that if she showed up at the library, he'd be waiting, and aware that if she was his friend again, he'd come running back.

And it wasn't fair. It wasn't fair that the universe had paired the most excitable person in the world with someone who didn't want a soulmate. It wasn't fair to Peter Parker.

"I would probably go splat on the concrete, Ned." Whispered a very flat voiced Peter during chemistry one day, and MJ couldn't stop herself from listening.

"You've gotta take a chance, man." The other boy responded, and then they were talking too quietly for her to hear.

If her assignment hadn't already been done, she probably wouldn't have been able to finish it, too focused on the words replaying in her head.

" You've gotta take a chance."

And as she looked over at her soulmate, at the boy who was supposed to be meant for her, she recalled the happy days of her parents' marriage, when they were so loving that MJ fake gagged every time they were in a room together, just to get them to break apart and laugh.

And she thought of all the soulmates out there who could make it work, who had long, happy lives together, and it hit her with stunning clarity that she had to take a chance.

After class ended, she bolted out of the room and stood outside the door, wringing her hands. She had to do this. Just one chance.

Peter and Ned came out of the class a few moments later, chattering about something or the other, and they stopped dead at the sight of MJ blocking their path.

"I'm so fucking sorry. You're my soulmate." She told him, almost trembling with anxiety.

Peter's mouth fell open in shock, and Ned's eyes widened so much she thought they'd pop out of his head and roll away.

"I've had 'fucking' on my arm since before I knew what a swear word was." Came his very well crafted response, and she winced.

"Coffee to make up for it?"

"Oh my g- Yes! Holy crap!"

Years later, when she lies in bed and waits for her husband to get home from patrolling, she will know that it was the best chance she ever took.