Nina

"Nina, why you still out there?"

I rubbed my eyes, fully sitting up and reaching for my phone. It was almost 3 am.

"Hmm?" I ran a hand down my face and looked up at Jay, who had just come from the room.

"Come get in this bed." He walked over to me and grabbed my hand, pulling me up.

"You're mad at me," I replied, letting go of his hand. "I'm not getting in no bed wit' you."

Ever since we left the courthouse yesterday, things were off. He didn't wanna talk to me anymore and his attitude was present. I spent the whole day giving him space because I didn't want to make him any more mad.

"I'm not."

"Yeah, okay," I sat back down on the couch and got back comfortable, my eyes still heavy with sleep. I closed them and curled up into a ball to keep warm. I did miss sharing a bed with him, but I wasn't gonna do so if he was upset and wouldn't tell me why.

I felt my body being lifted off the couch and my eyes shot open. He carried me the short distance to his bed and put me in the covers. I won't lie, the bed felt better underneath me, and the sheets were warm from where his body was. "Jay--"

"I'm not mad at you," though it was dark, I could see the tension on his face, in his body. Despite taking a nap earlier he still looked tired, and his eyes were red-rimmed like he had been crying. I wish he would just talk to me so I--

"Damn, Nina. Could you stop fucking lookin' at me like that?"

I scrunched up my eyebrows. "Like what?"

"Like you need to fix me. I am not your problem. I don't need you to worry about me all the time."

I flinched, surprised at what he was saying. "What does that mean?"

"I will always worry about you, Jay, because I care about you and I want you to be okay. I know I can't make everything better for you; even though I wish and pray that I could, I know I can't. I'm only doing what I know how to do, and that's to be here."

"But what's the point Nina? Why stay, why do all this for me? I don't deserve none of that shit. I don't know, shit doesn't make any sense to me. Why do you even stick around, ain't shit good about me," he mumbled.

I scoffed and turned around in the bed. "You don't get to tell me who I can and cannot worry about. You don't get to decide how much you mean to me. Goodnight, we gotta be up in a few hours."

"I gotta be up in a few hours."

"We do. Goodnight, Jay, " I said, ignoring the feeling in my throat that felt like I was about to cry. I wasn't sure what I did to make him upset, but it was no use crying about it, no matter how much it hurt to see him mad at me or trying to get rid of me. I hope he didn't mean none of it, cause being around him has me the happiest I been in a while. Despite everything going on from school to the trial, I see him as my person. I don't wanna lose that, especially when I just got it.

"Night," he said, walking out the room.

I didn't get much sleep after getting in the bed; I mainly stayed up watching tiktoks or scrolling through twitter. My mind was moving too fast, and I was anxious for the hearing today. We were finally going to hear the judge's ruling.

I got ready quickly so Jay could come back in and have his space back and clear his head before the trial. He was already up in the living room, pacing back and forth. I could just feel the nervous energy rolling off of him.

I wanted to tell him it would be alright, and that he would leave with custody of his son. But I knew nothing I could say would make him feel any better. And at the end of the day, it was all up to the judge to decide where Correy would end up.

Right as he was about to do another lap around the couch, I stood in front of him, blocking his path. The silence was comfortable; there weren't any words I needed to say. I simply wrapped my arms around his torso and squeezed gently, letting him know I was there. I couldn't stay mad at him for shit, and I let him embrace me back. So much was said with the hug, and I felt some of the anxiety in my chest release.

Behind me I heard Correy's little footsteps as he came out of his room. "Queen?" He asked in his little sleepy voice. I let go of Jay and walked over to him. "Yeah, it's me."

"Can I get a hug too?"

"Of course." I scooped him up and rubbed his back. "You slept well, Kingy?"

"Yes!" His breath was hot as hell, making me flinch and put him down. "Okay, good. Go wash up so we can leave soon."

"Bet," he turned to go to the bathroom down the hall.

"Aht aht. That's not how you talk to her. Didn't nobody teach you to say bet when talkin' to grown folks. Apologize," Jay added behind me.

Correy turned around and ran back up to me. "I'm sorry. Yes ma'am." I nodded to him and he turned back around and went to clean up for the day. I just laughed at his little personality. He was so much like his dad the way he walked and talked, it was like Jay hit copy and paste. He and Correy had just about the same complexion, similar eyes, and the same hair if Jay grew his out.

While they went to get ready, I just sat and prayed that they wouldn't be separated. Come on judge, don't fuck this one up.

The ride there was silent, as per usual. We walked in the courthouse, the building feeling all too chilly. Jay's lawyer met up with him in the lobby, while me and Correy went to the public benches. Wren, Flora, and Harley were already there, saving us seats.

"Good morning mami," Flora gave me a hug and then squeezed Correy's cheeks. He dapped up Wren and went to sit by Harley.

Just as we sat down the judge walked in and everyone stood up. He banged the gavel, starting the final hearing. "I'll hear closing arguments," and Sierra's lawyer stood up.

"Your Honor, My client requests sole custody of her son as the defendant has proven himself to be an unreliable parent who suffers from mental illness. That, paired with his complete disregard for the custody agreement he agreed upon with my client has shown that he does not care about consistency in the child's life, and should not be given custody. We ask that the court grant this wish for the wellbeing of the child. Thank you."

I rolled my eyes, then Jay's lawyer stood up to present her final argument. "Your Honor, my client has proven himself to be a competent father and role model for his son. As a prominent businessowner, Mr. Green has significant ties to the community and can provide a stable life for his child. His dedication to psychotherapy simply demonstrates how my client wishes to be the best version of himself so that he can be the best father he can possibly be. Your Honor, the defendant wishes to displace and destabilize the life of their son by moving him thousands of miles away during his formative years. We ask that the court take these factors into consideration and grant sole custody of Correy Green-Howell to Jaylen Green."

The judge nodded at both of them and wrote a few things down, then clasped his hands together.

"Both counselors have made their point to me about the fitness of each parent. I believe that both parties are competent enough to continue to care for the child. The only reason we are here today is because of two lapses in communication. The first being an out of town trip, and the second being a job opportunity."

"Initially, I was going to rule in a joint custody settlement, with terms of the agreement being proposed by each parent and a decision being reached by both Mr. Green and Ms. Howell. However, I do have a question to ask before I rule in this matter."

"Ms. Howell."

Sierra stood up, saying, "Yes, Your Honor?"

"I need you to answer this question truthfully. Are you going to take the job offer in New York?"

Sierra bit her lip, looking at her lawyer for guidance. Her lawyer gestured for her to answer, but she stayed silent for a little while longer, a nervous look crossing her face. "Ms. Howell?"

"Um, Your Honor I'm not sure how to respond."

"It's a yes or no question, Ms. Howell. Are you going to relocate to New York?"

"Yes, Your Honor. I no longer wish to stay in Louisiana, or be anywhere near Jay. I can't stand how he's trying to tear our family apart. I need a new start for my son and I--"

"That will be all, Ms. Howell."

She sat back down and he continued to write on his pad, eventually coming to a conclusion.

"In the custody case of Correy Green-Howell, I am ruling for a joint custody agreement, wherein both parents will be granted legal custody of the child," he started. My heart dropped, but I was still hopeful. This meant that Jay could still see Correy and have partial custody. I know it's not what he wanted but at the very least Correy would still have his father in his life.

"However, I am designating a domiciliary parent. A domiciliary parent is the parent with whom the child shall primarily reside. And since Ms. Howell, you will be relocating, I feel that this would be a disruption in schedule for the child and may cause behavioral problems later on. I am designating Mr. Green as the domiciliary parent, as this is in the child's best interest."

The gavel came down and Jay was on his feet, hugging his lawyer and nodding.

"Uh, miss lawyer girl. What all that mean?" Wren tapped my shoulder.

"It means Jay gon' have Correy most the time. It depends on what agreement they reach but it seems like Jay would have him during the school year and Sierra would have him in the summer, that way he wouldn't have to be goin' to multiple schools."

Wren nodded and grinned. "Yeah, I definitely like you. Cause me and Flora was just gon' sit here confused."

I chuckled. We all stood up to follow Jay and his lawyer out the courtroom. Correy and Harley ran up to my side, both trying to hold my hand. They bickered for a second, deciding who got to hold me.

"Lee that's not fair!"

"Yes it is! She a girl and I'm a girl so we can hold hands. That's how it work," Harley bucked.

"But she my Queen so I get to hold her hand. That's how it work," Correy tried pushing her, but she was older and stronger. She basically held him back with one finger.

They were still going back and forth when I decided to stop them cause they wanted to make a scene. "Y'all know I got two hands right?" They just looked at each other, then Harley made her way around to my other hand.

Finally settled, we waited outside for Jay since he had to stay back to meet with Sierra about the terms of their agreement. I was anxious just waiting to see him and hear how he felt about the whole thing. The minutes felt like years, though we only waited for another hour.

He shook his lawyer's hand and they went separate ways, her going to her car and him walking towards us with a folder in his hands and a sly grin on his face.

"So what's tea?!" Wren started as soon as he was close. Harley and Correy were still in the car, bickering and laughing about whatever in the backseat. The four of us stood outside, not wanting the kids to hear anything they didn't need to.

"Well, she was serious about taking the job. It's fucked up that she would leave him like that. I don't like Sierra outside of the fact that she gave me my child. But I want him to have a mother, you know? His momma should always be there for him, not far away."

No seriously. She had everything: a good co-parent and an amazing son. I don't think a job was worth almost losing both. A job wasn't worth almost uprooting Correy's life either. It was selfish what she was trying to do.

"So we decided since he's going to spend more time with me, he'll be in New Orleans for the school year. She can get him over the summer and for one holiday of her choice. Other than that, he's here to stay," he grinned from ear to ear.

"I knew that judge had some sense. He wouldn't take your baby from you," Flora said, hugging him.

"Yeah cause I woulda put several caps in his ass if he tried--" Wren started, but Flora gave her that look. "Sorry, damn. Always tryna kill me wit' them eyes," she mumbled. Jay laughed, the fullest one I've heard from him in a while, and hugged her as well. He looked at me then cleared his throat.

"Y'all mind taking Correy and Harley out for ice cream or somethin'? Just for a few hours," he asked them. Wren looked him up and down, while Flora confirmed. "Thank y'all. Best Godmothers ever." He went to the backseat and told Correy he'd see him later tonight.

"Yeah, yeah. Don't get too freaky na," Wren smirked.

He laced our fingers together and pulled me close as we walked over to his car.

The ride was silent once again, but with way less tension. I noticed we weren't taking the usual way to get back to his place. "Where we goin'?"

"You'll see."

A few exits and turns later we ended up at the same park he took me to on our first date. I smiled thinking of the memory.

Soon we were sitting on a park bench, letting the sun hit us, watching the birds and the water like we did that day. His arm was draped around me and my hand rested on his knee.

"Nina?"

"Mm?"

"I'm sorry." Yeah, damn right you should be! I won't rub it in though, so I just kept listening. "After they dragged me through the mud that day in court I just felt weak. All that shit coming out from therapy made me actually feel like I was losing my mind, or that I wasn't fit to be a father or fit to-- to be with you. That I was a bad person for letting myself get that fucked up--"

"You are not fucked up, Jay. You been through some shit and you're taking care of yourself. Don't talk like that." He nodded. "Always checkin' me."

"And I just felt insecure. Because how could I, wit' all my shitty problems, get to have you in my life? You, who know exactly what to do and exactly what to say. You, who kept me up when life was kicking the fuck outta me. You, who my son seems to be in love wit'."

We laughed at the last part. "Aw, my Kingy. He's so adorable."

"Yeah, when he not bein' annoying. Anyway, all that to say I'm sorry for tryna push you away when all you wanted to do was help. I'm not the best wit' using my words. I normally run from shit where I gotta use 'em, or shit that scares me. It scares me how much I like you, how much I feel like I absolutely need you in my life. All that's why I been being mean, but you didn't deserve that at all."

I nodded, his lil speech fully confirming everything that I was thinking. It felt good to have that verbal reassurance though. I liked knowing it wasn't crazy that wanted to be up under him all the time because he felt the same way. Nothing, yet everything, had changed between us.

"You accept my apology?"

"I do."

"You not mad at me?"

"I'm not."

"You wanna be my girlfriend?"

"I already am." I pulled his face down to mine and kissed his lips softly, making sure he knew I was in control of this. I leaned my forehead against his and smiled, feeling the warmth of him so close to me. I wish we could stay like this forever. I'd do anything for that.

okay loves, another chapter 😭💕 long wait, i'm sorry but i had just got back to school and things got busy as hell. but look at jay in *like* w nina 🥺 right ahead of valentine's day too. yk what they say, love a black woman from infinity to infinity 🤎👩🏿‍🦱♾➡️♾ lmk what y'all thought about this one. vote + comment for me .

-ColeWoorld