Never changing feelings

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Y/n pov:

I stepped outside my small cottage, a small tower of books in my arms.

The trees surrounding my cottage did nothing to shield my eyes. The sun shone down and met my
them, causing me to squint. I sighed and closed them, letting the sun meet my face to get my eyes used to the light.

Mornings were the worst.

I kicked the door closed behind me. As I walked away from the cottage, I could hear a few fishes in the pond next to me.
They were meeting the surface with their faces before diving down again, creating a rainy sound.

I kept walking down the path, out of the forest, on my way to the city.

-

It's been a month.
I've had enough time to move into a small cottage in the forest. Almost as if it was a miracle, the perfect one showed up.

It was close to a pond with fishes and frogs. I was met with birds singing every morning. As well as a few of my animal friends in my surroundings.

I've been into reading as well lately, it's been a good way of letting time pass.

-

My feet met the city grounds as I strolled through the flock of people. I held the books tightly to my chest as I walked past them all, minding my own business.

I heard chirping as I stepped up the first pair of steps into the main market. I looked into the sky and saw a familiar small bird soaring around the mass of people.

I stretched my hand out and allowed the bird to rest inside my palm. This however, made my books tougher to carry with simply one arm.

I kept walking through the crowd, doing my best to not to accidentally touch shoulders with anyone.

That's when I felt someone harshly nudge my shoulder, pushing their way past me through the crowd. As they did so, the bottom book in my stack was tugged out of place, causing the stack to fall.

The bird in my hand flew into the air in surprise and flew off. I sighed in annoyance and crouched down to pick up my stack.

Thankfully, no one in the crowd paid me much attention, and they all kept walking, not throwing me a single glance.

When my hand laid upon the first book to pick it up, another's hand beat me to it. This caused my hand to land upon theirs.

"Let me help you." He said. I frowned as I recognized the voice. Looking up, I was met with Kunikuzushi's indigo eyes.

I knew very well that had it been anyone else, Kunikuzushi had wouldn't bat them an eye.
Somehow, we kept running into each other all the time. Even when I did my best to avoid him, it felt as if he approached me on purpose.

He would attach himself to me like a bee to honey every single time we bumped into each other. And I had no idea why. As far as I knew, he hadn't gotten his memories back.

"Ah... thank you." I said, and he picked up most of the books as I had the few rest of them.

"We're you going to the library with these? Let me help you carry them." He spoke. He held some of the books in one of his arms, and he even helped me up like a gentleman.

"No, that really isn't necessary..." I replied, feeling my heart warm up at this interaction. He waved off my rejection and instead took my wrist, pulling me along down the street.
"It's no problem, so let's get going." He said.

I hadn't acted any different around him, yet something still pulled him towards me. It was strange, I didn't understand it at all. He would not leave me alone.

Half of me loved the fact that he was still pulled towards me, even after being a completely new incarnation with none of his past memories.

But the other half of me wanted him to have a completely new life. And knowing I was such a big part of his past life, he couldn't have that new one with me there.

There was silence between us as we walked. However, the one sided awkwardness was washed away by the loud crowd.

My body warmed up at how he stayed so close to me so we wouldn't lose each other in the crowd.
His fingers were wrapped around my wrist in such a firm hold, as if he was scared I would slither away from him.

We made our way through the crowd and at last we left the market. He still didn't let me go.

"Honestly, carrying so many books on your own. We're you wishing for your arms to fall off?" He joked as we walked. I felt my face heat up slightly in embarrassment and slightly in love.

"I didn't expect it to be so crowded this morning." I answered him. He hummed with a smile.

My eyes took notice of how he snatched a flower from a big flower pot we walked past.
He stepped in front of me, causing me to stop walking. I looked into his eyes, confused.

He stood in front of me with a loving smile and held the flower up between his fingers. My face heated up and I forced my eyes to look anywhere but his.

He smiled while lifting the flower up, putting it into my hair. It was a simple (f/c) flower, but it felt like it meant so much.

He leaned his face close to mine, causing me to slightly glare at him for his attempt. Then he spoke with a sly smirk. "Me helping you with your books, holding your hand, and gifting you a flower. It's sort of a date you know-" He said with a sly look.

Before he finished his sentence, I flicked his forehead, causing his head to be slightly pushed backwards with a small yelp.

One more thing I might mention about this past month... he's been approaching me with an intent to take me on a date. This side of him was so similar to the one I used to date.

"I knew it, you're just helping me as another attempt to flirt." I said and grabbed my books from his arms. I faked an annoyed look and started walking away. "H-hey wait!" He said and followed after me.

"Third time this week! Seriously!" I exclaimed and huffed, hearing him jog after me, afraid I'd leave his sight.

I heard him chuckle as he approached me and walked next to me. "You can't blame me now can you?" He said, a smirk on his face.

I rolled my eyes. "When will you give up already?" I sighed.

"When you've rejected me enough times to fill the whole library a thousand times." He answered slyly, not leaving my side, even though I walked quickly.

"Well we must be halfway there then." I replied, causing him to chuckle again.

"Come on, why are you so persistent in rejecting me?" He asked.

"I have no interest in dating anyone." I said, which couldn't be further from the truth. If anyone, I'd love him to be mine again.

"Why are you so set on dating me? You-" I halted before continuing my sentence, "you should go date someone else." I said. The thought of him dating anyone else hurt, but it would be the perfect way for him to start over.

"I won't. There's something about you. Something I can't explain." He said honestly. Which made my heart ache with love, put I put on a poker face. I sent him a glare. "There's nothing with me." I told him.

He's been insisting that there was some sort of spark between us, a spark I've been trying to hide so desperately. But he just won't let go of the matter.

He hummed before studying my face. "Are you sure there's nothing you want to tell me?" He asked. Could he read my expression? My feelings? I hated that he was always able to do such.

"There's nothing. You must be imagining things." I said immediately, and defensively. I hoped he didn't catch on to my behavior. This was another reason I wanted him to stay away from me. I'd never be able to suppress my feelings forever.

"Y/n please..." he grabbed my wrist firmly, causing me to lose my books again. The books all fell to the ground, but my eyes were piercing his.

"Please... I've always felt alone, when I left my nation and wandered... I came to Sumeru and still felt alone, but then I saw you." he said. I would soon cry at his hurt look.

"I don't know what it is, but maybe we can find out together. I know we've never met before that day... but..." he started, but I cut him off.

I ripped my wrist out of his hand. "I have a very busy schedule. I can't have any hindrances today." I said, rejecting him rather harshly. Hopefully this would be the last time I had to reject him. I didn't know if I had the energy to do it anymore times.

"But-"

"Goodbye." I said. I hurriedly picked up the rest of my books and turned my back to him. Then I walked away, this time I didn't hear his steps following after me. I let out a shaky breath.


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